Chapter .1.

Trouble in Cario.

Cairo, Egypt.

Artemis, the boy genius, was supposed to be on holiday with his happily formed family in Cairo but Artemis didn't find it as enjoyable as his parents. While they were taking photos of the pyramids and the Nile, he sat in the shade of a café pondering his next ingenious scheme for money. Butler squished a mosquito idly trying to bite his neck. The heat and the crowded streets made the bodyguard extra tense. Artemis scratched his temple. Neither spoke. Butler broke this silence.

"You should take a look around Artemis, while you're here that is."

Artemis stared at his bodyguard a while, considering his idea.

"It may clear your head?" added Butler.

After a while, Artemis gave in.

"Alright, but only because my head is pounding through this heat."

They made their way through the crowded streets, densely populated by merchants, peasants and beggars. Many beggars sat on rugs in the shade; some wrapped in thick potato sacks. How did they stand this heat with those things on them? Thought Artemis.

"Do you think the people are having a better time than me?" Artemis asked, not looking at the hulk of a man beside him.

"I don't know," replied Butler, "I doubt it though. Probably work as usual."

"Speaking of the people…" Artemis was staring at a rather small pair of beggars sitting behind a fruit stall. One was lying down and completely covered in a blanket. The second sat upright, shawl wrapped tightly around her head.

"Artemis…don't!" Too late. Young master Fowl was already standing beside the two and introducing himself.

"Hello." He said, in his clearly Irish accent. "I'm Artemis Fowl, pleased to meet you."

The small female looked up, showing Artemis her stunning brown eyes amongst her muddy face. She looked modestly surprised.

"Do you speak English?"

She still had a blank expression. The bundle next to her groaned, wriggled sideways and came to rest, back, to the wall. Artemis turned his attention to the moving canvas sack. The voice was deep, clearly male.

"What's wrong with him?"

"He sick." Replied the lady. Her accent was very convincing.

"I see."

"I sell house to pay hospital bill but not enough." She explained. "He may die."

"I see" repeated Artemis. "May I take a look Miss Short?"

"What you call me?" Puzzlement was written all over her face.

"Miss Short. I know who you are. No need to hide from me."

Butler ran behind Artemis and clapped a hand over Artemis' mouth.

"I'm very sorry" he apologised "doesn't know where he is today."

Butler reached into his pocket and pulled out some notes.

"Here" he said, gesturing to the money "take it."

She did hesitantly, and Butler let go of Artemis.

"She didn't look very keen to take that." Protested Artemis.

"Lets go Artemis."

"Don't worry Butler, I know what I'm doing."

He strode back over to where the female beggar was studying the notes carefully.

"Shall I give you some reasons why I think you are my friend Miss Short and not a beggar?" began Artemis.

The beggar nodded. "Go on then."

"1. your hair sticking out of your hood is of auburn colour and well conditioned, which I don't think a poor beggar would have."

She stared at a tuff of hair sticking out from under her hood, quickly stuffing it back under the shawl.

"2. you are quite short for any human and much too developed for a child."

"That doesn't prove anything, I could be a midget!" Her accent went off slightly.

"O.K I'll give you that but what about reason three. Look around." Artemis gestured the other beggars around.

"What?"

"They all have bare feet and you." He pointed at her feet, "Are wearing state-of-the-art moon boots only worn by LEPrechaun employees."

She stared down at her feet at where he was pointing, also covering this patch of evidence with her blanket. Butler had to smile. Artemis did amaze him sometimes.

"Hello Holly, nice to see you again!" Artemis held out his hand. The fairy looked up, eyes narrowed, but soon she smiled and shook his hand.

"Your such a show off mud boy!" she smiled. "Hi again Butler."

Butler nodded his head. "So what are you doing here Captain?"

"Top Secret mission," Holly tapped her cherry like nose with a forefinger. "Can't let interfering mud boys and his pets know!"

"Have you come alone?"

She smiled at them and nodded towards the bundle next to her.

"Of course not, I do have back up."

Artemis pulled at the potato sack, revealing the head of…Commander Root, his usual beetroot colour.

"Damn you mud boy." He swore.

"Commander, how nice to see you too!" joked Artemis, and he didn't usually do that!

"So" said Butler, scratching a mosquito bite, "Its just you two here?"

"Of course not," snapped Root, "that would be suicide. Captain Kelp and Private Verbil are over there." Root pointed to another pair of beggars in a small alley.

"Kelp? I think I've locked shoulders with him before. Verbil, I don't know him. Well, I soon will and believe me, he will wish I hadn't." Butler smiled and turned to follow Artemis.

"Oh, one more thing." Artemis stopped and turned to face the Commander. "Don't talk too loudly. I don't want some mud boy to give us away."

Artemis nodded in agreement and presumed walking towards the beggars.

"Hello" greeted Artemis. Now this was different. One was sitting upright and covered in what appeared to be five layers of blankets and sacks. The other was leaning against the wall, also covered in a blanket, had a face dirtier than the floor they were sitting on. He looked up at the sound of a voice.

"Hel-lo? " he questioned.

"You must be Kelp?" continued Artemis, ignoring his fake confusion.

"No, no sir. I humble servant. I look after brother." He gestured to the pile off cloth on his right.

"Ah, yes, private Verbil." Artemis received a confused glare for this remark. "Why is he wearing all that? It must be boiling!"

"Yes 'tis. But 'tis the only why he can hide his deformity!"

"His deformed?"

"Aye, aye."

"That's a bit offensive to him captain, he must not be that bad."

"What?" his voice sounded more like his own.

"Your Captain Kelp, Holly said so, or has she got it wrong?"

Kelp smiled at Artemis. "Call me Trouble." He said, stretching out his hand. Artemis shook it.

"And this is Private Verbil?"

"Yeah, that's him. Verbil. Verbil? CHIX!" Kelp gave the fairy a sharp elbow to the ribs. The bundle of rags got the fright of his life and toppled sideways.

"Wha' the heck was that for?" it mumbled.

"This is Artemis, Chix." Trouble gestured to Artemis, "He was the one who kidnapped Holly. "

"I see…" Suddenly a green arm shot out from under the cloth. Kelp's expression went ballistic.

"Put your arm back in!" Whispered Trouble, whacking Verbil's forearm. It quickly withdrew with a high yelp.

"You must be a sprite then Private. Is that why your hiding?"

"Nah, this is the latest fashion!" Chix said sarcastically.

Kelp rolled his eyes.

"So, why are you four here? Holly won't tell me you see."

"And I won't either." Agreed Trouble sternly. "Its top secret!"

" If I was to find somewhere private, would you tell me then?"

Kelp thought for a moment before agreeing. Chix just fiddled with the sheets shielding his green arms.

"O.K mud boy, but it better be secluded."

"No problem!" Artemis turned to Butler, "Can you go back to our hotel and see if the back rooms free? Say it's urgent."

Butler nodded and strolled over to a large building Artemis had been sitting outside of.

"Now if you'd like to follow me gentlemen, we can talk."