The Elements Series is set immediately after 'And It Rained…' So you must read that first! Also, this fic isn't pure Buffy/Spike - Willow/Kennedy, Willow/Tara, Xander/Anya and hints of Dawn/Andrew are also included. Others will appear later on too, and I'm open to ANY suggestions to improve the fic! (though I completely draw the line at B/A or Riley returning - lol)
Distribution: Just let me know please! Disclaimer: Joss Whedon owns all the characters, and so does ME, Fox, etc
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Spike shut the door behind him, as he stepped outside into the sharp, cold night air, and shivered. Being a vampire, the temperature shouldn't have bothered him, but somehow the goings on of the past 24 hours mixed in with the full moon chilled him to the bone.
"How're you doing luv?"
He sat down next to the blonde huddled on the porch.
"Okay, I guess," Buffy grasped his hand, and leant towards him, comforted by his presence.
"Kennedy's back. Says she thinks she got something out of Willow earlier. Looks good." Spike tried at cheering her up, but got no response. Nevertheless, Spike went on. "The Whelp seems to be doing a bit better. Stopped taking to himself."
Buffy just put her head on his shoulder and sighed.
"Buffy…look at me…" Spike murmured softly. "Look at me."
Reluctantly, Buffy titled her head to meet his eyes.
"You're an idiot."
Buffy's eyes widened with surprise, and lifted her head from his shoulder. "Okay, not what I was expecting but…"
"I mean…" Spike took an un-needed breath. "None of this is your fault. It's not your fault that Faith's gone. It's not your fault that Red or Giles are in the hospital, that Anya's missing or what Xander's going through." He touched her cheek. "You can't blame yourself for everything all the time."
A tear rolled down Buffy's cheek, and Spike wiped it away. "It is my fault." Buffy's voice caught in her throat. "I let this happen. I should've been more careful, quicker…" Another tear dropped to the ground. "Eight years, Spike. Eight years ago I shouldn't have ever let them help me. If I hadn't, maybe…maybe they would still be okay." She sniffed. "Willow would be at Oxford studying something so clever I can't even say its name," Tears began to flow freely down her face. "But now…now she's in hospital, unconscious and bleeding all because of me." Buffy swallowed and fiddled with Spike's sleeve. "I did this. It's me. Faith's…" She whispered. "Faith's dead because of me…"
"Faith got to live her life to the full for almost six years, in ways some people don't get to in a lifetime. All because of you."
"Because I died? Because I let Kendra get killed? Being chosen and shortening your life-span isn't something you usually thank people for…"
"She could never have reached the limits she did if she hadn't been chosen. Think. Faith's life wouldn't have had any real meaning to her, no higher purpose. But after she was chosen she could fight, she could release her pain in being the Slayer. Buffy…you're the reason Faith was willing to die. You inspire that kind of feeling in people."
"Great…" Buffy said bitterly. "I inspire people to get killed…"
"No," Spike held her hand tightly. "You inspire people to care that much about others. Faith five years ago would never have given herself up so willingly as she did last night. She sacrificed herself because she was ready to, because she knew what she had to do." He looked down. "Like that night at the tower. You knew. Just like she did."
Buffy shut her eyes tightly. "I'm the reason…"
Spike cut her off. "You're the reason that we're still here today, the reason we have enough strength left to keep on fighting. Buffy…" His voice dropped and he looked back up at her. Tears were streaming down the Slayer's face, but she didn't seem to care anymore. "You're our reason for living."
Suddenly, Buffy burst into loud, uncontrollable sobs and tears ran down her cheeks as Spike pulled her towards him. "Shh…" He kissed her forehead. "I love you."
Buffy swallowed hard and looked up at him, pain evident in her eyes. "I love you too."
The Slayer wiped the tears from her cheeks, lay her head back down on his shoulder and shut her eyes. "I love you…" She repeated softly.
Spike put his arm around her, and stroked her hair.
"Spike…" Buffy whispered, sleepily. "Tell me a story?"
"A story? Luv, you sound like a small child…" Spike smiled at her, slightly amused.
"For once I don't want to have to be the Chosen One." Buffy sighed, opening her blood-shot eyes to look back up at him. "All adult-y and responsible. Story?"
Spike shook his head in wonder at the strange yet beautiful woman in his arms. "Okay…"
Buffy shifted slightly so she was more comfortable, and closed her eyes again.
"Once upon a time in a faraway land, there was a young girl who was chosen for a very special job. One day a prince, with an unusually pale complexion and bleached hair, rode through her kingdom on his horse, and fell in love with her…" Buffy slowly drifted off into the land of dreams, a small smile on her tear-stained face, as he told their story of the past 4 years all over again – something neither had really reviewed since they turned the first page.
As he watched her sleep, Spike could only pray that she would have a peaceful rest, and that she could forgive herself for all things that weren't even her fault to begin with.
As he gently lifted her into his arms and carried her back into the house, he failed to see the wind blow through the trees with an urgent gush; the neighbour's garden sprinkler falter for a fraction of a second; a burning star in the deep blue sky flicker, then disappear; and a daisy droop, as if it had just been picked.
If these four events had been noticed, well.
Maybe things would have turned out differently.
End of Fire./Part1
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AN: End of this part!! Moving on to Fire./Part 2 very soon!! But hey, only if I know you guys are still reading. :D How to let me know? Review, of course! :P
*gives reader a toffee apple*
