The gays and Nick continued on around the gate which would hopefully plunge them into Wisconsin. Nick would sit there with an eye twitching the whole time and plotting death threats to the gays.
"You stupid gays are gonna die! YOUR ALL GONNA DIE! Then my precious will be in my hands, and I'll be rich! RICH I TELL YOU!" said Nick.
"I don't trust him at all Mr. Finny," said Sam.
"Oh Sam that's nonsense, look at him. He's so enlightening," said Finny. Nick then turned to the gays.
"I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" screamed Nick.
"Can we get something to eat first?" asked Finny.
"Sure," said Nick. He then plunged his hand into some nearby bushes and pulled out a rabbit. He then put both his hands on it's neck and snapped it's spine instantly with an emotional look on his face.
"Here, eat it raw! I heard you could get salmonella from it," said Nick.
"No there's only one proper way to cook it," said Sam. He then took the rabbit and through it into a pot he had. Sam then took out his matches and started up a roasting fire. He added some water and diced the rabbit to meat then threw it in with vegetables of all sorts. Nick gave a disgusted look at the pot.
"Nasty," said Nick.
"No, it's actually quite good," said Sam. But Nick was far too picky to eat what Sam had to cook.
"You're just ruining it you fool," said Nick.
"What would you know? You're just a deformed freak," said Sam.
"Sam why are you always so mean to him?" asked Finny.
"Look at him! He's obviously plotting against us!" yelled Sam. They turned and saw Nick approaching them with a butcher knife. He then quickly hid it and started whistling.
"No I think he has good intentions. I actually feel sorry for him," said Finny. Finny and Sam fought and Nick got an annoyed look on his face.
"Screw you gays, I'm gonna go find something actually good to eat," said Nick. Nick then ventured off into the woods in search of food.
"Now look at what you did, you lost our guide Sam!" yelled Finny.
"He was gonna slaughter us anyways," said Sam.
"C'mon Sam we have to go find him!" said Finny.
"But…" started Sam.
"No buts! He's our only guide and if we don't find him, we'll be lost in Wisconsin forever!" said Finny. He then grabbed Sam's arm and dragged him into the woods after Nick. They went around trees and through brush in the woods until suddenly they heard a loud noise.
"What was that?" asked Sam.
"It sounded like an elephant," said Finny.
"But nobody has ever seen an elephant in Wisconsin before," said Sam. So they went towards the sound until they came to a clearing with lots of tourists marching along the path. Suddenly, an elephant came out of the clearing with a couple of tourists on top of it.
"Look Mr. Finny, an elephant! The people back home will never believe me!" said Sam excitively.
"Well no duh they won't believe you, cause an elephant in Wisconsin would just sound like you were drunk when you saw it," said Finny.
"Yes but you saw it too Mr. Finny!" said Sam.
"Yeah but I'm not pissing my pants over it like you are," said Finny. Suddenly out of the bushes a football sailed and hit one of the tourists in the head. Then footballs all around went and fell half of the tourists. The elephant got scared and jumped up, throwing the tourists off it's back. It then started running away, trampling some tourists. More footballs sailed and fell the rest of the tourists.
"What was that?!?" exclaimed Finny.
"Huh? What happened? I was staring at the elephant," said Sam.
"Damn it Sam, footballs just came out of no where and killed all the tourists!" yelled Finny. Suddenly, men came out of the bushes dressed in Vikings sweatshirts with their hoods up. They had a bag of footballs on their backs and many weapons. They grabbed Finny and Sam and took them through the forest.
"Who are you?" asked Finny. They ignored him and then took him to a cave behind a waterfall overlooking a small pool. They then put Finny and Sam down and started plotting their course.
"If we go this way, then the forces of Wisconsin will surely crush us," said their leader.
"Well we must go this way then," said one of the followers. The leader then turned to Finny and Sam.
"What are a couple of gays doing in Wisconsin?" asked the leader.
"We were, um….going to my grandma's house," said Finny trying to hide the ring.
"Yeah, his grandma's house," said Sam.
"What are your names?" asked the leader.
"My name is Finny Baggins," said Finny.
"And mine is Sam Densemore," said Sam.
"If you don't mind me asking, what is your name?" asked Finny.
"My name is Gary Anderson and I'm from Winona," said Gary.
"GASP! That must mean you're.." started Finny.
"Calm down. I don't have a brother, well at least I don't think I do," said Gary. He then sat in thought. Finny started playing the ring around his neck. Gary then looked at him.
"What's this?" he asked, then reached in Finny's shirt and took out the ring.
"Why this is…" he started then trailed off. His eyes were locked on the ring. Finny began to panic, for it would mean that the ring would only be stolen. Suddenly one of Gary's henchmen came running in.
"Master Gary! We've found a deformed creature in the pool right under us!" exclaimed the henchmen. Finny knew this meant only one thing. Nick had been found. He stared with a face of fear as Gary and his henchmen went out to the pool to capture Nick.
"You stupid gays are gonna die! YOUR ALL GONNA DIE! Then my precious will be in my hands, and I'll be rich! RICH I TELL YOU!" said Nick.
"I don't trust him at all Mr. Finny," said Sam.
"Oh Sam that's nonsense, look at him. He's so enlightening," said Finny. Nick then turned to the gays.
"I'M GONNA KILL YOU!" screamed Nick.
"Can we get something to eat first?" asked Finny.
"Sure," said Nick. He then plunged his hand into some nearby bushes and pulled out a rabbit. He then put both his hands on it's neck and snapped it's spine instantly with an emotional look on his face.
"Here, eat it raw! I heard you could get salmonella from it," said Nick.
"No there's only one proper way to cook it," said Sam. He then took the rabbit and through it into a pot he had. Sam then took out his matches and started up a roasting fire. He added some water and diced the rabbit to meat then threw it in with vegetables of all sorts. Nick gave a disgusted look at the pot.
"Nasty," said Nick.
"No, it's actually quite good," said Sam. But Nick was far too picky to eat what Sam had to cook.
"You're just ruining it you fool," said Nick.
"What would you know? You're just a deformed freak," said Sam.
"Sam why are you always so mean to him?" asked Finny.
"Look at him! He's obviously plotting against us!" yelled Sam. They turned and saw Nick approaching them with a butcher knife. He then quickly hid it and started whistling.
"No I think he has good intentions. I actually feel sorry for him," said Finny. Finny and Sam fought and Nick got an annoyed look on his face.
"Screw you gays, I'm gonna go find something actually good to eat," said Nick. Nick then ventured off into the woods in search of food.
"Now look at what you did, you lost our guide Sam!" yelled Finny.
"He was gonna slaughter us anyways," said Sam.
"C'mon Sam we have to go find him!" said Finny.
"But…" started Sam.
"No buts! He's our only guide and if we don't find him, we'll be lost in Wisconsin forever!" said Finny. He then grabbed Sam's arm and dragged him into the woods after Nick. They went around trees and through brush in the woods until suddenly they heard a loud noise.
"What was that?" asked Sam.
"It sounded like an elephant," said Finny.
"But nobody has ever seen an elephant in Wisconsin before," said Sam. So they went towards the sound until they came to a clearing with lots of tourists marching along the path. Suddenly, an elephant came out of the clearing with a couple of tourists on top of it.
"Look Mr. Finny, an elephant! The people back home will never believe me!" said Sam excitively.
"Well no duh they won't believe you, cause an elephant in Wisconsin would just sound like you were drunk when you saw it," said Finny.
"Yes but you saw it too Mr. Finny!" said Sam.
"Yeah but I'm not pissing my pants over it like you are," said Finny. Suddenly out of the bushes a football sailed and hit one of the tourists in the head. Then footballs all around went and fell half of the tourists. The elephant got scared and jumped up, throwing the tourists off it's back. It then started running away, trampling some tourists. More footballs sailed and fell the rest of the tourists.
"What was that?!?" exclaimed Finny.
"Huh? What happened? I was staring at the elephant," said Sam.
"Damn it Sam, footballs just came out of no where and killed all the tourists!" yelled Finny. Suddenly, men came out of the bushes dressed in Vikings sweatshirts with their hoods up. They had a bag of footballs on their backs and many weapons. They grabbed Finny and Sam and took them through the forest.
"Who are you?" asked Finny. They ignored him and then took him to a cave behind a waterfall overlooking a small pool. They then put Finny and Sam down and started plotting their course.
"If we go this way, then the forces of Wisconsin will surely crush us," said their leader.
"Well we must go this way then," said one of the followers. The leader then turned to Finny and Sam.
"What are a couple of gays doing in Wisconsin?" asked the leader.
"We were, um….going to my grandma's house," said Finny trying to hide the ring.
"Yeah, his grandma's house," said Sam.
"What are your names?" asked the leader.
"My name is Finny Baggins," said Finny.
"And mine is Sam Densemore," said Sam.
"If you don't mind me asking, what is your name?" asked Finny.
"My name is Gary Anderson and I'm from Winona," said Gary.
"GASP! That must mean you're.." started Finny.
"Calm down. I don't have a brother, well at least I don't think I do," said Gary. He then sat in thought. Finny started playing the ring around his neck. Gary then looked at him.
"What's this?" he asked, then reached in Finny's shirt and took out the ring.
"Why this is…" he started then trailed off. His eyes were locked on the ring. Finny began to panic, for it would mean that the ring would only be stolen. Suddenly one of Gary's henchmen came running in.
"Master Gary! We've found a deformed creature in the pool right under us!" exclaimed the henchmen. Finny knew this meant only one thing. Nick had been found. He stared with a face of fear as Gary and his henchmen went out to the pool to capture Nick.