Disclaimer: I don't own Hamtaro. Get over it.

Author's Note: I make many references to my old comic "Everybody Loves Flash_Fox" in this fic, so if you get confused too much or want to see the comic, the link is in my profile.

Edit: I've changed it so it doesn't say you went to the football game Cheerleader Bijou. I'm sorry if the idea of you cheerleading a football game offended you. I don't see how I called you a boy, but just in case I find it in the mere future, I'm sorry for that too.

A Very Hamtaro Satire

By Flash_fox

Chapter 7: Breadway

(Laura wakes and Hamtaro wakes and everything is peachy when…)

Laura: Guess what Hamtaro! Our workplace is having a musical!

Hamtaro: Musical?

Laura: Yes Musical!

Hamtaro: ...

Laura's Mom: Laura! It's almost 5:30 AM! Your ganna be late for work!

Laura: Sorry I can't take you with me while I'm doing child labor Hamtaro. See ya! (Runs out of her room.)

Hamtaro: Now it's time to go to the clubhouse. (Runs behind bed. No hole in the wall.) Rats, I should of known they would link that rat problem to this hole… Now how will I get out… I know! (Run downstairs and out the wide open door. He jumps in the controls of a wrecking ball and through the magic of television could operate it properly. He smashes a hole into Laura's room. Then Hamtaro climbs out of the controls, runs into the house and escapes from the giant hole in Laura's room. He slides down the drainpipe and lands on the debris covered Brandy.) You should take a bath Brandy, you look a little dirty. (Runs off to the clubhouse)

(Meanwhile at a local walnut farm…)

Mr. Yoshi: Laura, Kana, you go with the harvesting crew. Fat kid who appeared out of no where and accidentally tore Kana's drawing which lead to a pointless thing where Laura thought Kana was angry at her in "Be Brave Cappy", you go sort out the hay.

Fat kid who appeared out of no where and accidentally tore Kana's drawing which lead to a pointless thing where Laura thought Kana was angry at her in "Be Brave Cappy": Umm… don't mind me asking sir, but why do we need hay on a walnut farm?

Mr. Yoshi: (Long pause) You fired Fat kid who appeared out of no where and accidentally tore Kana's drawing which lead to a pointless thing where Laura thought Kana was angry at her in "Be Brave Cappy".

Fat kid who appeared out of no where and accidentally tore Kana's drawing which lead to a pointless thing where Laura thought Kana was angry at her in "Be Brave Cappy": Awww man…

Mr. Yoshi: Remember, everyone in the musical meets after work tonight. That's 10:30 PM sharp!

(Everyone goes where they are supposed to be.)

Laura: I'm so excited! Tonight, I audition. Tomorrow, opening night.

Kana: They don't give ya that much time…

Laura: Well this is only a two-part chapter.

Kana: That's so cool!

(Meanwhile back at the clubhouse…)

Hamtaro: Laura is doing a musical at her school!

Everyone: (Thinks: Like we care but since we are being paid a hefty salary for this…) Wow.

Hamtaro: Maybe we can make our own musical!

Boss: Eh, nothing better to do.

(A little bit later…)

Maxwell: In order for us to make a parody of the musical "Cats", we need a writer. Now who's its ganna be?

Howdy: How about that Shakespeare guy?

Maxwell: Long since dead.

Howdy: Shucks.

Cappy: How about Lady Magnus Prime?

Boss: Who's Lady Magnus Prime?

Maxwell: She's too busy dating Snoozer.

Cappy: What?!?! (Runs out door.)

Boss: How about that Katy-Chan?

Maxwell: Too busy hugging Stan.

Bijou: What about Tortured Artist?

Maxwell: No, he's being tortured.

Dexter: What about Pashmina Fan?

Maxwell: Fanning down Pashmina.

Howdy: Cheerleader Bijou?

Maxwell: She's preparing for the cheerleading meet.

Oxnard: How about Joe Mellow?

Maxwell: Too mellow.

Howdy: What about that RoseSandrock?

Maxwell: I dunno… But I know that if we don't get a writer, this story will be a kingdom of bloopers (Pun intended)

(The show "Everybody Loves Flash_fox" plays on the TV. Penelope is watching it.)

On the TV:

FF: LFF, no!

LFF: Woah…

(Picture on Crystal from Star Fox adventures on FF's computer.)

LFF: …

FF: (blushes)

Penelope: Ookyoo!

Boss: Penelope, I don't think that's a show for little hamsters.

Howdy: What about that Flash_fox guy?

Maxwell: The one writing the fic?

Howdy: No, the one who used to do this show.

Maxwell: Well, he hasn't worked since that show went out of popularity…

Hamtaro: I'll call him! (Runs to phone.)

(Meanwhile, in pretty much another universe…)

FF: (Walks into his home.)

LFF: (At table) Hey dad.

FF: Any calls while I was gone?

LFF: Lord Boshi orders a pizza.

FF: I ment calls to this house.

LFF: Where do you think LB ordered?

LB: Where's my pizza!

Foxy: (Walks down the stairs wearing a shirt saying "Frisbee champ, some year-some other year") Hey dad!

FF: Hey Foxy

Foxy: Can we go to the nearest thrift store FF?

LB: You mean the hippie shop?

Foxy: Yeah

FF: Can you do it LFF? Hamtaro is on.

LFF: Sigh… ok…

FF: (Turns on TV.)

(Shows Hamtaro picking up the phone.)

Hamtaro: What is flash_fox's number again?

(Catches the attention of everyone in FF's house except LB who is eating pizza and nachos)

Maxwell: The number is 328-3369.

Oxnard: How did you remember that one so fast?

Maxwell: I just remember that it means FAT-FFOX.

Hamtaro: (Dials)

(Everyone in FF's house except LB who is testing FF's rocket launcher jumped when the phone rang. FF picks it up.)

Flash_Fox: Hello… Yes I'm FF

Hamtaro: Darn… busy… (Hangs up)

LFF: Wait, then who is FF talking to?

Flash_Fox: Well yes I'm interested in car insurance.

LFF: (Takes phone) NO HE ISN'T! (Hangs up phone.)

Flash_Fox: Why did you do that?

Foxy: The last time you bought car insurance; we had to sell the Fonz.

(Meanwhile in a medical class…)

(Fonzy is an assistant for a teacher.)

Teacher: To get rid of the Luke worm, first you cover the seat with honey and sit on it.

Fonz: Aye! You don't tell the Fonz to sit on it!

(Now back to FF's house…)

LB: You had the Fonz?

FF: I always collect American idols.

Simon: This joke is so bad, if you were in the dark ages they would of stoned you.

FF: You da man Simon!

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We'll be right back

Oxnard, holding a cheese is cornered by a cat. Oxnard shivers in fear. The cat takes the cheese.

Oxnard: What the? Oh no, you did not just take my cheese. (Attacks cat. Runs off with cheese.)

Ah the power of cheese.

And now we're back

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(Back to the clubhouse…)

(FF and LB walk through the entrance of the clubhouse.)

FF: Nothing like going through a mind mending portal to another universe. (Sees Howdy) Hi… uh… I forgot your name… What's your name?

Howdy: Howdy

FF: Hi, what's your name?

Howdy: Howdy

FF: Hi, what's your name?

Howdy: Howdy!

FF: … (To Pashmina) What's his name?

Pashmina: Howdy

FF: Oh don't you start.

Pashmina: No, his name is Howdy.

FF: oh… (towards Howdy) Hi Howdy

Howdy: Howdy

FF: Oh now you tell me your name!

Everyone in the room (Sweat drop)

FF: Ok, I've already decided on where the musical will take place. The Starbucks theatre of Starbucks street of Starbucks city. The humans will be doing a play contest there tomorrow night.

Hamtaro: But the humans can't understand us hamsters.

FF: Then we'll add subtitles and call it an Ophra.

Maxwell: Don't you mean an Opera?

FF: Sure, what did I say?

Sandy: But how are we ganna memorize all those verses and stuff in that little time?

FF: Hey, if Laura can do it in 10 minutes in "The Glass Slipper Chase", then we can do it in two days.

Everyone: Oompa!

LB: Gah!

FF: What's wrong?

LB: There aren't any windows, how are we ganna get out?

FF: There is a door.

LB: Door? No one uses doors anymore.

To Be Continued

Author's note: If you feel embarrassed or offended by anything said or done in this fic, remember that I didn't mean any harm to you and please don't hurt me. If you would like an apology, ask for it in a review and I'll post it with the next chapter. (Oh BTW, I am a guy.)