It was wet, slimy, spontaneous and dangerous. You'd even call it superfluous and all because because because this is a shameless plug for cat in the hat!! Damn those advertisements. They've dug into my mind and copyrighted my soul. But back to the wet sliminess; what could it be? Yes, what could that nasty mass of crap be? It has to be- oh look! It's Yusuke and Kuwabara strolling down the street happily arm in arm holding a bag while their children play beside them. Sure the child is actually a frozen burrito wrapper and the bag is the entrails of a stray demon slowly dripping all over the ground behind them, but we're using our imaginations kids.
Not-so-little Kuwabara was grinning madly now that he and his lover had solved the latest case assigned by not-so-babyfied hotness Koenma. Beating the snap out of demons with someone you love is like being in a world of your own. A world filled with blood and entrails and sugar coated gumdrops.... yes life was perfect for the precious little redhead. He had the perfect life and nothing to fear. Nothing to fear except.....He shook his head. He shouldn't ponder on such things. He had Yusuke now, what did he have to worry about? The demon in question turned to his tall lover and grinned in that not-so-kyute way that meant he either wanted to kill, make-out, go for a stroll under a moonlit sky, or have hot sex. That's one special grin there.
Well, we're gonna say it was the sex grin so they can conveniently go have hot sex. It's another stupid plot device n'all. Oh, and by the way, they dropped those demon entrails in the garbage. That's right kids, follow their example and don't litter. Just because you throw it away doesn't mean the gutter rats will like it.
******************
It lurked. Oh did it lurk. It was the lurkiest of lurkers. It was Lord of the Lurk. And it was evol. It was *insert clever title here* a.k.a. the wetness from part 1. Yes, it has returned, the *insert clever title here*. Evol *insert clever title here* had been lying dormant, waiting for the right time to strike. It was ready to lash out and destroy the lives of Kuwabara and Yusuke. Now was the right time, the time for *insert clever title here* to achieve vengeance! Soon it would have it's prey and there was nothing the half demon and the human could do!
*insert clever title here* chuckled. Or gurgled. Wet things make wet sounds after all...
********************
So...um....so.... Ok Yusuke has got Kuwabara upside down, ok, and he's like pounding into him and like moaning n'stuff, and Kuwabara's dizzy from pleasure and the blood rushing to his head, and then they like were reaching climax. There, that wasn't so hard. Ahem.
Yusuke pounded into his lover's body once more before yanno in his yanno causing his gentle lover to climax all over the both of them. Well, not really all over them, 'cause that's not humanly possible. Actually, most of the sex scenes in fanfics are in no way possible, but we ignore this fact in pursuit of hot monkey loving between two anime characters. Hoo yeah. Hot.
The two relaxed and demon boy's knees buckled beneath him. They crashed to the floor, him landing on top of Kuwabara.
"Sorri Kuwa....Love u...", Yusuke whispered before promptly passing out.
"Ah, my Urameshi. So kyute.", sighed Kuwa. He attempted to pat his lover on the head, but failed when he found his arms to be trapped beneath him. Well damn. That sux. At least he was comfy right? But no. What was that? Was there a-? No! It couldn't be!!! Kuwabara's eyes widened and his body became rigid. There was something wet near his ear!! He winced and began to scoot away, but then he realized it could have been yanno. Yeah, could have been sperm next to his ear. He could handle sperm, blood, and well-aimed lugi's. Anything else? Hell no!
He relaxed rationalizing what it must be. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes to sleep... Ah fuck it! That stuff was still to gross, even if it was- fuck! It couldn't be sperm either! Sperm should be warm and that sure as hell was not. Our young maiden began to panic. He was helplessly pinned down by his prone lover and the wetness seemed to travel ever closer to the delicate shell of his ear. He flailed and squirmed but to no avail. He was trapped, maybe forever.
Yusuke snorted. "Yeah....the squirrels did hump my spirit gun.....no Kuwa.... I like the monkey in my pants...." He continued to moan aimlessly unaware of his lover's plight. Kuwabara continued to squirm and began to yell out Yusuke's name.
"Yeah, yah like dat..dun u Kuwa...." Yusuke began to snore still oblivious to anything around him.
The wetness crawled deeper still, the living embodiment of ear infection and disease. It leaked and slurped and leaked more like a baby drinking a fiber drink. In fact the not-so-nice wetness was on a mission to KILL. Poor Kuwabara was meant to be it's victim. But wait, what was that gentle stirring from above? Is it a lark, a raven, maybe a dove? Why not a dove was it at all. 'Twas Yusuke's mother with a bottle of alcohol. Another advertisement for Cat in the Hat. It's the last one and let that be that.
Alas, it was Yusuke's mother with another bottle in her hands, standing in the doorway to her son's bedroom in her son's apartment. Plot device? No..... She approached her prone son, listening to Kuwabara whimper all the way, and then raised that alcohol bottle and brought it sharply down upon her stupid little boy's head. Repeatedly. Until he began to bleed. And after he woke up too. Hey, she was drunk. That's not child abuse, right?
Yusuke, now finally awake and very very naked, leapt off of his fire-haired lover and hefted him above his head effectively rescuing him from the wetness. But the wetness was quick. It traveled across the floor and up the wall.
"Oh no you don't yah little bitch!", shouted Yusuke. He took after it after setting Kuwa gently on the bed that they'd neglected using which got them in this mess to begin with. Yusuke dived and dashed in the dark with the wetness alluding him every time. He crashed into a wall after a particularly fumbled jump and turned on the light. Ooo, now he could actually see the puddle of shit. We sure don't love him because he's smart.
With his newfound gift of sight, he cornered the wetness, leaned over, and swallowed it. Kuwabara gasped in shock. His mother went searching for another drink. Yusuke gasped and choked, and then he fell to the ground in one of those dramatic dying sequences. It was a visual marvel, really. Yap. Anywayz, Kuwabara slid over to catch his fall, barely succeeding in doing so and held him close.
How could this happen? How could this new love that had blossomed so quickly disappear in so little time. Oh Jack! I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go!!!!
Well, dramaticness aside, Yusuke was really ok. In fact, besides being a little grossed out, he felt G-R-A-T-E great! In celebration of him being alive and well he and his lover had some more wild sex.
So, in the end Yusuke and Kuwabara fucked like rabbits, Yusuke's mom drank herself into a small coma, and *insert clever name here* was defeated.
The End.
************************
wwwwwaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrruuuuu!!!!!!! and we're done! haha! to my 3 fans out there, i'd like to say thank u for sticking with me and God bless. i luv u guys so much! on a more serious note, if someone is abusing anyone else under the influence of alcohol: backslap them and then report them to the police. Abuse is never a joke.
Not-so-little Kuwabara was grinning madly now that he and his lover had solved the latest case assigned by not-so-babyfied hotness Koenma. Beating the snap out of demons with someone you love is like being in a world of your own. A world filled with blood and entrails and sugar coated gumdrops.... yes life was perfect for the precious little redhead. He had the perfect life and nothing to fear. Nothing to fear except.....He shook his head. He shouldn't ponder on such things. He had Yusuke now, what did he have to worry about? The demon in question turned to his tall lover and grinned in that not-so-kyute way that meant he either wanted to kill, make-out, go for a stroll under a moonlit sky, or have hot sex. That's one special grin there.
Well, we're gonna say it was the sex grin so they can conveniently go have hot sex. It's another stupid plot device n'all. Oh, and by the way, they dropped those demon entrails in the garbage. That's right kids, follow their example and don't litter. Just because you throw it away doesn't mean the gutter rats will like it.
******************
It lurked. Oh did it lurk. It was the lurkiest of lurkers. It was Lord of the Lurk. And it was evol. It was *insert clever title here* a.k.a. the wetness from part 1. Yes, it has returned, the *insert clever title here*. Evol *insert clever title here* had been lying dormant, waiting for the right time to strike. It was ready to lash out and destroy the lives of Kuwabara and Yusuke. Now was the right time, the time for *insert clever title here* to achieve vengeance! Soon it would have it's prey and there was nothing the half demon and the human could do!
*insert clever title here* chuckled. Or gurgled. Wet things make wet sounds after all...
********************
So...um....so.... Ok Yusuke has got Kuwabara upside down, ok, and he's like pounding into him and like moaning n'stuff, and Kuwabara's dizzy from pleasure and the blood rushing to his head, and then they like were reaching climax. There, that wasn't so hard. Ahem.
Yusuke pounded into his lover's body once more before yanno in his yanno causing his gentle lover to climax all over the both of them. Well, not really all over them, 'cause that's not humanly possible. Actually, most of the sex scenes in fanfics are in no way possible, but we ignore this fact in pursuit of hot monkey loving between two anime characters. Hoo yeah. Hot.
The two relaxed and demon boy's knees buckled beneath him. They crashed to the floor, him landing on top of Kuwabara.
"Sorri Kuwa....Love u...", Yusuke whispered before promptly passing out.
"Ah, my Urameshi. So kyute.", sighed Kuwa. He attempted to pat his lover on the head, but failed when he found his arms to be trapped beneath him. Well damn. That sux. At least he was comfy right? But no. What was that? Was there a-? No! It couldn't be!!! Kuwabara's eyes widened and his body became rigid. There was something wet near his ear!! He winced and began to scoot away, but then he realized it could have been yanno. Yeah, could have been sperm next to his ear. He could handle sperm, blood, and well-aimed lugi's. Anything else? Hell no!
He relaxed rationalizing what it must be. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes to sleep... Ah fuck it! That stuff was still to gross, even if it was- fuck! It couldn't be sperm either! Sperm should be warm and that sure as hell was not. Our young maiden began to panic. He was helplessly pinned down by his prone lover and the wetness seemed to travel ever closer to the delicate shell of his ear. He flailed and squirmed but to no avail. He was trapped, maybe forever.
Yusuke snorted. "Yeah....the squirrels did hump my spirit gun.....no Kuwa.... I like the monkey in my pants...." He continued to moan aimlessly unaware of his lover's plight. Kuwabara continued to squirm and began to yell out Yusuke's name.
"Yeah, yah like dat..dun u Kuwa...." Yusuke began to snore still oblivious to anything around him.
The wetness crawled deeper still, the living embodiment of ear infection and disease. It leaked and slurped and leaked more like a baby drinking a fiber drink. In fact the not-so-nice wetness was on a mission to KILL. Poor Kuwabara was meant to be it's victim. But wait, what was that gentle stirring from above? Is it a lark, a raven, maybe a dove? Why not a dove was it at all. 'Twas Yusuke's mother with a bottle of alcohol. Another advertisement for Cat in the Hat. It's the last one and let that be that.
Alas, it was Yusuke's mother with another bottle in her hands, standing in the doorway to her son's bedroom in her son's apartment. Plot device? No..... She approached her prone son, listening to Kuwabara whimper all the way, and then raised that alcohol bottle and brought it sharply down upon her stupid little boy's head. Repeatedly. Until he began to bleed. And after he woke up too. Hey, she was drunk. That's not child abuse, right?
Yusuke, now finally awake and very very naked, leapt off of his fire-haired lover and hefted him above his head effectively rescuing him from the wetness. But the wetness was quick. It traveled across the floor and up the wall.
"Oh no you don't yah little bitch!", shouted Yusuke. He took after it after setting Kuwa gently on the bed that they'd neglected using which got them in this mess to begin with. Yusuke dived and dashed in the dark with the wetness alluding him every time. He crashed into a wall after a particularly fumbled jump and turned on the light. Ooo, now he could actually see the puddle of shit. We sure don't love him because he's smart.
With his newfound gift of sight, he cornered the wetness, leaned over, and swallowed it. Kuwabara gasped in shock. His mother went searching for another drink. Yusuke gasped and choked, and then he fell to the ground in one of those dramatic dying sequences. It was a visual marvel, really. Yap. Anywayz, Kuwabara slid over to catch his fall, barely succeeding in doing so and held him close.
How could this happen? How could this new love that had blossomed so quickly disappear in so little time. Oh Jack! I'll never let go Jack, I'll never let go!!!!
Well, dramaticness aside, Yusuke was really ok. In fact, besides being a little grossed out, he felt G-R-A-T-E great! In celebration of him being alive and well he and his lover had some more wild sex.
So, in the end Yusuke and Kuwabara fucked like rabbits, Yusuke's mom drank herself into a small coma, and *insert clever name here* was defeated.
The End.
************************
wwwwwaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrruuuuu!!!!!!! and we're done! haha! to my 3 fans out there, i'd like to say thank u for sticking with me and God bless. i luv u guys so much! on a more serious note, if someone is abusing anyone else under the influence of alcohol: backslap them and then report them to the police. Abuse is never a joke.