Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation.

Hey people! This is my very first fanfic, so please be gentle with me. Also, I wanted to say that English is not my first language and I don't have a beta, so if there are any mistakes just tell me and I will correct them. I think that was everything I wanted to say, but if you've got any questions, feel free to ask.

On with the fic.

Promise

"Why do you never say it?" he asked, staring blankly out of the window of my car. What did I do to bring that up? But I should have known. Shuichi was just too quiet for being himself and dwelling like that was not like him either. He was the happy-go-lucky type of guy, not that I want to say he's stupid but usually he doesn't think about things unless it's nessesarry.

I heard him sigh and when I glanced over at him I saw him turning to the passenger's side's window. I could see the hurt look in his eyes for not answering him through his reflection as I kept driving.

It must have been the party they threw for Tatsuha's birthday that made Shuichi think. That idiotic childlike singer always clinging to Tatsuha like a madman.

It startled me when he spoke again, jerking me out of my thoughts.

"You know, Yuki, it's not like I want you to say it now or anytime soon. It's just … it would just be nice to hear it once in my life, you know," he softly said.

I sighed heavily as I pulled up in the garage. I turned the engine off, leaning back against my seat looking up at the ceiling and closing my eyes. I heard him unbuckling his seatbelt and slowly turning to watch me. The fear was emanating from every small movement, I could feel it clearly.

"I'm sorry, Yuki. I didn't …"

"Shut up!"

The only thing I knew how to defend my mask of uncaring: push him away from me. As far as possible.

"But, Yuki …"

"I said SHUT UP, stupid!"

That's it. I hurt him again. As I glanced over at him I could see tears hanging in the corners of his eyes, threatening to fall any second. I sighed, unbuckled my seatbelt and slowly turned around to face him. I saw his eyes widening in shock for a moment as I wiped his tears away with my thumps, my palms gently brushing his cheeks.

"Don't cry," I said softly. I didn't want him to cry over me. It made my heart ache so much that I wanted to cry with him. But that, of course, was something he didn't know and what I would never show him. It would give him so much more power over me than he already held.

"I'm so sorry, Yuki," he started again. This time I would let him talk. He hung his head, tears now running freely down his cheeks. He stiffled a few sobs before continueing, wiping his eyes with his sleeves from time to time.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to bring things up and I just should have kept my big mouth shut. I know how hard it is for you, I didn't mean to hurt you, it's just that I can never be sure. I didn't mean to …"

I did the only thing I knew to silence him when he was rambling like that. I tilted his head up and kissed him sofly on his lips, leaning my forehead against his after parting. As I looked in his surprised eyes he looked down a bit again.

"I just love you so much that I don't know what I would do without you, Yuki. And I can never be sure if you're feeling the same way," he whispered before burrying his head in my neck and arms wrapping around me tightly. He cried freely now, hard sobs shaking his skinny but beautiful form. I gently wrapped my arms around him and pulled him closer, letting him cry in my arms. He knew I just couldn't fulfill his request and maybe never would be able to. My past wouldn't let me, the wounds still being too fresh, just starting to heal. Through him. That is the reason that there is no denying for me offering him as much affection possible for me, without dropping too many of my walls built in all those years.

He cried himself to sleep, as was to be expected. I carefully carried him into the apartment we shared, not wanting to disturb his sleep. I brought him to the bedroom and when I had him tucked under the covers I carefully sat down beside him, gently strocking his soft pink hair. The moonlight filtering in through the closed curtains cast an eerie gleam on his angelic face making him look even more beautiful, if that was possible. He looked so peaceful, breathing in a soft and steady rhythm, making me want to stay with him. But I wouldn't let myself disturb him right now, so I slowly bent down, lightly kissing his forehead before making my way to the door. I turned around looking at him one last time before starting off to my study.

"This I promise you, Shuichi, once in your life I will tell you that I love," I said barely above a whisper before closing the door.

Yuki Eiri never saw the purple orbs staring at the closed door, brimming with tears again.

I know it was short and there was not a lot of sense behind it, but anyway, please review and tell me what you think. Thanks.

There, I fixed it. At least what I found.