Yay! Chapter six:

It was a strange thing, hurtling past the tops of trees that one had formerly walked through, Jandalf thought. She turned to the Susrog somehow. "Did you have to do that?"

The Susrog nodded and grinned. "As you know, I'm the demon of Somewhere Unimportant. I gotta turn away any…what's the word?" She explored her limited vocabulary unsuccessfully.

"Intruders?" offered Jandalf.

"Yeah. I gotta. You know, it's just my job."

Jandalf sighed. "Great. Well, at least I'll get to change into something white," she said, looking at her orange, now rather dirty, robes.

And they kept hurtling down till they splashed into a small city's pool and caused a major disturbance among the citizens of Winkler, Manitoba, Canada, North America, Earth, Earth System, Galactic Sector A, the Milky Way.

Chelsegorn emerged from the tunnel into the mountains. "More mountains?"

Katrinolas came out right behind her. "Look, it's a valley down there."

Lindo and Taffy came out once she had found a wastebasket to dispose of her garbage. "Oh, look, a valley."

"That's what I just said," snapped Katrinolas.

"Big deal." Lindo headed down to it.

Katrinolas and Chelsegorn looked at each other, then followed Lindo, Taffy close behind.

They gradually came into a different forest, with odd-looking trees. The four looked up at the trees, thinking that they looked like they didn't belong on this planet. Or in this story, for that matter.

A high-pitched yell suddenly came from the canopies. A small green form fell off of a branch somewhere, and came to the ground with a thump.

The four winced.

The green…whatever it was…stood up and brushed himself off. Then he noticed the group and dashed behind a tree. "You didn't see anything," he yelled.

Lindo walked around the tree. "You look oddly familiar."

"How would you know, you slimy Earthanoid?! Speak with respect when you talk to the best invader in the Irkan Armada!!!!!!!! I AM ZIM!!!!!!!!!!!"

Lindo stared at him for a second, then punched him square in the face. He howled and glared at her.

"I'm not HUMAN!" she yelled. "I'm a HOBBIT!!! GET IT THROUGH YOUR BIG GREEN HEAD!!!"

"I don't have a big head," he pouted. "That's Dib's head."

"DIE!!!!" She punched him again, and he fell into the tree's cavity, yelling his big green head off.

"Come on," she said to the others, and kept walking into the thickening plot…I mean, forest.

Suddenly a bright white light shone through the trees at a point somewhere ahead. Taffy was drawn to it like a mosquito to a bug zapper.

"Dumb dog," Lindo muttered, and followed him.

"Dumb hobbit," Chelsegorn muttered, and followed her.

"Dumb human," Katrinolas muttered, and followed all three of them.

It was Jandalf, trying to tug her cloak free from a briar bush. "Oh, hi, guys."

"Wait," said Lindo. "You're not Jandalf. You're not orange."

"Jandalf? Yes, that's what they used to call me. I changed, okay?" Jandalf said, exasperated. "Well, I died, too, but that's beside the point. I also saw lots of pretty stars. But that's also beside the point."

"What's the point?!" they yelled simultaneously.

"I was getting to that." She finally tugged her cloak free and began picking the thorns out of it. "Minions of Xendor."

"Okay, I'm convinced now," said Lindo.

Jandalf glared at her. "What was I saying? Oh, right. The point: Sore-on-my-head's house is in this valley. Actually, I think we're in his backyard."

"That would explain the yard gnome," said Chelsegorn, mistakenly pointing to Lindo.

Lindo pounced at her but slammed into an invisible wall. Jandalf glared at her again. "No more of that right now. We're close to accomplishing our goal. Now, if you'll wait just a minute…" Jandalf took out her cell phone and dialed a number. "Hello. Yeah, it's me… Where are you?…Oh, okay…yeah, that would be good…see you." She hung up.

"Who was that?" asked Katrinolas.

"Shadowfax. He has this uncanny connection to phone lines. I'll never understand it. Anyway…here he comes."

A large white horse came galloping down the slope. He slowed down and came to a halt in front of them, coughing violently.

"I thought I told you to quit smoking," scolded Jandalf.

Shadowfax whinnied despondently.

"I do not smoke," she replied indignantly, "and you know it. Minions of Xendor, why does everyone automatically associate wizards with tobacco pipes? Here, have a patch." She took out a horse-sized nicotine patch and stuck it on Shadowfax. "Okay, people, hop on."

Somehow, like Lindo's tent in the cavern, they all fit on the horse's back.

Jandalf whistled a tune while they rode, and, moments later, she found she had accidentally attracted at least five dozen horses, who trotted along behind them.

"Minions of Xendor," she muttered, and waved them off. "Shoo, go away."

The horses, confused, scattered into the foliage.

Lindo, on a whim, tapped Jandalf's shoulder.

"Yes?"

"Are you human?"

"Uh…actually, I don't know."

Lindo seemed rather taken aback. "Why not? How can you not know?"

Jandalf shrugged. "All I know is, I'm a wizard. I'm fairly sure Mikumon and I are in the same boat, though. We've actually debated the issue several times."

"Oh." Lindo seemed somewhat confused, an easy goal to accomplish for any wizard.

There actually were several yard gnomes, many of them looking oddly like Lindo clones. Either that, or they were carrying machine guns. Guerrilla yard gnomes?

"It just screams 'Zim was here'," muttered Jandalf. "We're getting closer. Anyone not want to go in Sore-on-my-head's house? It's going to be freaky, I can promise you that."

Taffy jumped off Shadowfax.

"Chicken," said Lindo.

Taffy ignored her but went over to piddle on a Lindo-yard gnome.

She scowled at him.

Chelsegorn hopped off to keep Taffy company and pulled Katrinolas after her.

"Hey!" said Katrinolas. "Who said I don't want to go? I've been there before!"

"Who says you did want to go?" said Chelsegorn.

"Me, duh. Let go."

"Fine."

Katrinolas swung back up. "Well, what are we waiting for?"

Shadowfax took the hint and cantered off.

Chelsegorn grabbed Taffy's paw and swung him around. "Wheeeeeeee!!!!!!"

OK, I'm almost done posting the story, obviously. But there shall be a sequel…