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Title: For all my power...
Author: MissMarvel (Sensor Girl)
Date: November 2003
Rating: PG
Feedback: MissMarvel13@shaw.ca
Archive: Sure you can! Just drop me a note telling me where!
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters mentioned in this story...yet. However until that fateful day they are owned souly
By Marvel Comics. I wish I were making money off this fiction but I am not.
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Ah feel so free! Ah can barely remember the last time ah felt this alive! Ah finally, after all these years, ah have mah life back!
When I drained Cody ah thought it was all ovah but ah was wrong. Ah remember that night like it was yesterday. One kiss. Just between two young kids. Innocent. Something went wrong. Ah felt the pull, his memories become mine. I couldn't stop it. Then he collapsed. It's happened a few times after that, had to in mah line of work, but it was never quite the same. Always something different there. Maliciousness? Sense of duty? Whatever it was, I can forget about it now. Through some strange twist of fate, that left me without mah powers, ah can touch again! Ah nevah thought skin on skin contact could feel so good. This is a new begginin'. A fresh start. Without mah powers, without the gloves and without the X-Men. Ah can be normal now, just like ah always wanted. There's no reason not to be. Ah can settle down, get a decent, honest job, make new friends. It's gonna be great! And Remy'll be there too. Now that ah can touch there's no reason our relationship can't move to the next level. Maybe we can get an apartment, or a nice little house. Settle down, both get jobs. Maybe even get married in a couple years. We could be, no, we WILL be so happy! We'd both go off to our day jobs, our normal everyday nine to five jobs, just so we could come home to each other later. Maybe come home to a nice dinner, candle light, soft music, the whole nine yards.
Afterwards sit by a fire and talk til midnight. Then maybe a couple years later we could start a family. Ah know Remy'd make
a great Daddy. Ballet or piano lessons, the first day of school, everything. We'd give our child the childhood we never got to
have. There'd be love. And that'll get us through. No, it hasn't happened yet, but with mah powers outta the way...who knows?
I wish I were dead. Dat's about as clear as I can make it. I coulda been dead but Rogue brought me back. I don' know if I
can ever forgive her for dat, really. Sure, I love her. I'll always love her but it doesn't justify her bringing me back from my only
shot at happiness. It's not dat I wanted to leave her, it's just dat it's too damn hard to go on living. I came back for what? To
have my powers stripped from me? Do you know what dis means? No more adventure. I'm of no use to the X-Men now. You can't stop a bad guy with looks! They barely kept me around before, what about now? I guess I could do some theivin' for dem eventually...after I re-learn all the skills I had before. Poppa warned me about dis. Relyin' to heavy on ya powers. Never thought dey'd be taken away really. Not forever. I'd give anything to have 'em back. I...even considered goin' back to Sinister for help. I don' want to but it might be de only way. Well, unless you count suicide. Which I just might. Death, no matter how final it is, has got to be better dan dis. You know, I still forget dere gone sometimes. Just today I tried to charge a card. Nothing happened. I hate dis feeling. Dis new vulnerability that comes with loosin' a peice of who you are. I don't have any way to defend myself or Rogue if Sinister decides he wants revenge. Or even Angel for dat matter. But ya know what really kills me? I lost the powers but my eyes are still de same. I can't call myself a mutant anymore but I have no chance of living a normal life. I can wear sunglasses, but the fact is someone's either gonna get suspicious or eventually turn out de lights. It's not fair. I don't understand how Rogue can be so happy. I'm glad that she's enjoyin' it but I can't move on dat easy. Not on dis issue. It's killin' me inside. It's killin' me and I can't do anything about it. So I'll just do what I always do. Which is nothing...