Tomoko-chan: Hey! It be me again, answering some reviews. Kamorgana: Thank
for being civil when responding. I appreciate it greatly. When Kenshin
experienced that moment of convulsions, it was not because of AIDS or the
loss of blood. Do not fear, all will be explained. His madness and odd
behavior will also be explained. Thank you! Kira, chibi-tanuki, and
SamuraiX Koneko, thank you so much for your kind reviews. As you can see, I
have updated earlier than usual! Thank you all. As most of you saw, I
started a new fanfic called the Poetic Archive. It is a shrine of poems to
the Kenshin Gumi. Please send in the people you want poems about, and I
will write them! Coolio, rulio, let's go in a poolio!
Hee hee. Chimps in black boots.
*****
Kaoru wiggled in Kenshin's tight, protective grasp, struggling to free her self. He smiled cruelly as an evil chuckle rose in his throat, deep and meaningful. Her eyes widened in fear; she had never heard him laugh like that. His laughs were always bright and airy and were let out at just the right moment, accompanied by his sweet smiles. Like candy, she noted.
But now his fiery hair loomed loosely over her like a haunting flame, burning her skin and heating it with fear. His gold-engulfed eyes weighted her with the metal, keeping her body between him and the floor. She knew that the angel of death had come for her. Kenshin would eventually finish with her and grab a nearby needle and fill it with chemicals and punch it into her, or grab the chair next to them and whack her over the head until she went into a coma. Or something witty and painful like that. It would have to be, for Kaoru didn't think she could ever hurt Kenshin back.
But could destiny be changed?
She raised her right knee quickly into Kenshin's groin and observed his eyes widen and grow blank in pain. He fell to one side, clutching his crotch, while Kaoru shot up and ran to the wall again, panting. Sweat beaded her forehead as she watched Kenshin's agony. He had closed his eyes now and laid there, hands loosely placed below his waist.
"Why. . .?" Kaoru managed, gasping for air.
"Why what?" His eyes remained closed.
"Why everything? Why me and Kenji? Why that whore? Why the scars on your cheek?" Tears lingered on her eyelashes.
Kenshin griped the metal railing for his hospital bed and pulled him self to his feet, shaky and unsteady like a newborn colt. He wobbled momentarily, his head down and his hair covering all signs of a face.
"Why?" He asked her, aggravation in his tone. "You mean you don't remember yet?" Kaoru fumbled behind her back for the door knob. Her brow furrowed in frightened confusion.
Kenshin chuckled, his hair still hiding the obvious smile on his face. Kaoru nearly wished aloud that his head would stay down. Though it lolled to the sides occasionally, disturbing her, she did not want to see what the hair hid. "Because it's fun to remember, Kaoru. Then I can change it all I want. You know, experiment with all of our lives, so to speak. You wanna know why, Kaoru? Little Miss Kaoru? Kaoru-dono?"
Her eyes widened. He hadn't called her that for so long. Her heart tore.
His head rose, exposing a twisted, insane grin. Kaoru couldn't bear a gasp. A sick terror rose in her throat, releasing as a horrified squawk. Inside, she screamed, 'My Kenshin! Oh, my darling! My baby. . . what the fuck did you do to my baby!?' She wanted to run up to him screaming like a mad-man, and hold him as she did so, so they could be insane together at least.
But even in her thoughts, she was afraid to touch him.
"Because I think it's FUN."
Kaoru looked at him, and saw the blood dripping from his hands.
She screamed, opened the door, and ran screeching for her life out into the hallway.
*****
"Aoshi-chan."
Aoshi's gaze shot from the magazine to Misao instantly, his instincts picking up her voice at the first note. He dropped the thin, badly bound media source and wrapped his arms around her, closing his eyes tightly. "Thank Kami-sama. . ." He breathed in relief. Misao hardly responded, and only patted his back with a faint smile in return. Pulling apart their embrace, he stared at her, scolding softly. "Why aren't you in a bed?"
"I'm not hurt." She answered simply, shrugging her shoulders as if it were nothing. "I had nothing wrong with me, so they just let me go. All I did was faint. That's all."
"Why did you go to his house anyway?" Aoshi kept his hold on her, forcing her to look back into his eyes. He knew she felt uncomfortable, staring back at people, but he knew that's a true sign of her truthfulness.
"Well," Her heart and mind were having totally different conversations. "He's my. . ."
::Lover::
"Friend, so I wondered if he was okay enough so we could. . ."
::Become one again. To loose ourselves once more::
"Catch a movie or something. I didn't want to call, because it was a little early when I would have called, and I was worried. . ."
::That his wife would come in and see us, naked and clean and pure, just like Kami-sama made us. But he made us to be ashamed in ourselves that way. We would cover ourselves, not to hide from each other, but only from her. She didn't understand::
"That he had work or something. It was late-afternoon when I thought about going, so I figured it was about right to. . ."
::See if he felt the same for me::
"Go over and ask." She completed finally, feeling like she had no air in her chest. Aoshi brushed a strand of charcoal hair from her face, which was nearly identical to his. The emerald in his gaze calmed and frightened her at the same time, as if she were being presented a huge, expensive precious stone. She shot her own stare to the floor, afraid her faded, tired blue would give away something. Aoshi smiled, and engulfed her in another hug.
"Let's go home." He spoke by her ear, sounding calm and collected as Misao felt ready to collapse inside. Tears wet the corners of her eyes. She felt like she was five again, so it was okay to cry for no reason.
"Aoshi-sempai. . ." She buried her face into his black jacket and cried.
*****
Kaoru pulled out her cell phone, but did not know who to call.
She sat in her car, still in the hospital parking lot, holding her armor-black phone blankly, wondering who was there to catch her as she began to fall. The insanity in his eyes still burned her soul. She breathed hard, trying to rid her mind of the sight. She could feel the hate in his being. She could taste the blood on his tongue. She smelled the sweat against his fevered skin, tingling with every move she made. He wanted more. She knew.
She was never more disturbed in her life.
She was positive that there was no blood on his hands, and yet there was. There was so much. It gathered and fell into disgusting piles by his feet, dripping in scarlet fullness. Blood from his past. From those moments in time Kaoru could not find. There was blood. It was there.
She was sure of it.
Kaoru took the ragged paper from her purse and looked it over, trying to decipher the digits in the night. She did not want to turn on her car light; the dark was fine. Besides, Kenshin had hurt her in the light. What if he came back to her in the light again? No, she couldn't trust the light again.
An unknown tear fell from her eyes, blemishing the last number. She hardly cared, but she was disappointed that she might not be able to call him. It was hard enough to read in this darkness, but to read faded numerals was a little more difficult. She wasn't even sure she wanted to call anyone. Perhaps she would just stay there all night in her car, and it would be good enough.
But, oh, how she ached! Her heart crackled like rice cereal in her chest, the cuts swerving and deepening within her. Her body was so tired of it all. This running around and falling to the ground in tears and being hit. . . she was exhausted. Her mind was faint and distant, loosing consciousness.
The buttons of the phone glowed in char-truce light as she dialed the number.
*****
"Hello?"
"Aoshi. . ."
His eyes widened briefly as he grasped the black-painted desk phone. His mouth grew to a small smile that wrapped faintly around his teeth. "Kaoru! I didn't think you would call so early after we met. Good thing I just got home. I don't too far from the hospital." He leaned against the mahogany bookcase, filled with rows and columns of thick leather-bound books. "Not that I don't mind you calling, or anything." He laughed nervously. "So, how are you? How is your husband?"
Kaoru smiled quietly at the sound of his laugh, but it slipped away and shattered in her heart. She didn't want to cry in front of him again, but it seemed so hard to hold them inside. The almost burned. She covered her nose and sniffled, hoping he wouldn't hear.
But he did.
His eyes lowered in concern. "Kaoru? What's wrong?"
She drew her hand to her mouth, droplets oozing from her tear ducts. "Aoshi. . ." She started again, her fingers muffling the words. "His eyes, Aoshi. His eyes. They hurt. He was crazy, but I couldn't scream. I couldn't scream for the longest time. I couldn't understand it. I didn't know why he changed. He started talking about messing with peoples lives, and remembering. . ." She paused to breathe, her face red and hot. "And then he hit me. . ."
"He HIT you!?" Aoshi nearly screamed.
"He looked so weak, then he just stood up and he kissed me. I wanted it, but I couldn't feel right. He didn't FEEL right when he did it. He hurt me, so I pushed him away. But he didn't like that at all." She moved her hand to finger her waist. She held herself. "I knew he wanted to kill me. He wanted to kill me and love me at the same time."
"Kaoru, where are you?"
"Still at the hospital."
"You're not. . ."
"No. I'm not still with him. If I were, I'd probably be dead now."
"Stay there. I'm coming to get you."
"I'm in my car. . ."
"I don't care!" He yelled, slamming a hand onto the desk. "Stay there. I'll find you. I'll get you. Okay?"
She nodded, aware he couldn't see her. "Okay."
"I'll be there soon. It's imperative you don't move."
"I won't."
"Promise?"
"I promise."
"See you soon." He hesitated before hanging up the phone, and waited for Kaoru to hang up first before he did so. He sighed as he grabbed his black leather jacket from the coat hanger by the door, and Misao poked her head from the doorway, hiding herself with a green towel.
"Where are you going?"
"Out."
"When will you be back?"
"I don't know."
"Do you know anything?" She smiled, accidentally letting the towel droop and exposing part of her milky-white breast. He smiled grimly, remembering how he used to bathe his baby sister, her chest flat as a board and her woman hood perfectly hairless, and how those days were gone. She would show complete strangers her nakedness, but would scream if he came in while she was changing or bathing.
"Not yet." He opened the door, the smirk still on his face.
*****
She had left her car a while ago and was now sitting on the curb in front of the hospital. She didn't want to stay in there anymore; it was too cramped. Kaoru sighed into the sleeves of her sweatshirt, which she had just taken off of her waist and pulled it over her. Kaoru shivered still. She would have to eat or sleep soon; she could almost feel the energy dripping out of her body. Her eyelids fell temptingly, but lifted again at the sound approaching her. It sounded like the jingle of wind chimes, but maybe a little bit heavier.
Then Aoshi emerged from the darkness, his keys clinking under his palm.
He shoved them in his pocket and ran to her, bowing down to her level to grasp her shoulders. "Are you okay? Where did he hit you?" He demanded, his eyes wide and scolding. Kaoru's eyes stayed nearly closed, as if she were bored.
"I'm fine. He just hit my face."
"I see. . ." He moved a strand of her hair away and noted the redness on her right cheek. He stroked it gently and caressed it with his finger tips. Kaoru closed her eyes, allowing the faint pleasure of his softness to caress her. Tears slipped without realization from her lashes, wetting his hand. He stared at it.
"What. . ."
She stopped him and grasped his hand. Kaoru took it and placed it on her heart, her pulse beating smooth and even. Her mouth was an expressionless line, but her eyes dripped with sadness.
"Do you feel that?"
"Yes."
"Doesn't it feel broken?"
"A little."
"Can you fix that?"
"I don't know."
"I'm hungry." She said randomly.
"I know a good Japanese restaurant, if you want to go."
"Yes please."
He smiled, allowing her to hold his hand to her chest for a while. "You said you wouldn't move." He hinted. She gave the air of a sigh, her head bowing a little.
"I wanted to give the light a second chance."
*****
"More sake, please." Kaoru raised a hand to the waitress, who bowed in understanding. Aoshi held his face and smiled, his tempura getting cold after not being eaten for so long. Kaoru, however, had eaten almost three times as much as he had ordered, complete with appetizers, dessert, and drinks. Then again, he had not ordered very much, but still, she ate as if it were her last meal.
::You shouldn't drink so much sake, that you shouldn't.::
"You shouldn't drink so much." Aoshi stated, not quite sure why.
"You sound like Kenshin." Kaoru retorted over the rim of the glass after another gulp. Her cheeks had grown rosy and soft-looking, and her eyes gleamed like sapphires at the bottom of a lake. She set down the glass, a curved smile on her face. She laughed.
He raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"
The low chuckle in her throat became a gut-bursting guffaw in seconds. She held her side as tears squeezed from the corners of her eyes. Aoshi blushed when he noticed the stares emanating from the people around him. He just couldn't figure out what was so damn funny.
"What?" He demanded again. Kaoru's laughs subsided a bit and she wiped her eyes.
"I just now realized," She started, her hand moving from her stomach to her lap. "That I know you better than my own husband. I even think I like you better." She smiled. Aoshi stared her down, serious.
"Don't say that. You're going through a rough time with your husband. Now isn't the time to have doubts with him. He'll be fine. YOU'LL be fine."
She looked at the tatami-clad floor. "No. I'm divorcing him. We are supposed to go to the attorney's office tomorrow, but I don't think that will work out. They might let him out, but I don't think they will." She stood and wobbled briefly before walking to the other side of the table to join Aoshi. Kaoru kneeled and leaned her head on his shoulder as she clutched the sleeve of his deep, blue shirt.
Aoshi blushed a deep pink, his eyes drifting to her. "Are you sleepy?"
She nodded faintly, placing her head in his lap. "A little. But I. . . I just hurt. I'm tired and I hurt. I'm tired in my body, I'm tired in my mind, I'm tired in my heart." She hugged his waist, cuddling into his black denim jeans. "And it hurts. I'm tired of this pain."
He averted his gaze, trying to look busy with his meal, picking loosely. Kaoru squeezed him harder.
"Me thinks you're embarrassed." She chuckled.
"Oh, yea, well me thinks you've had enough. Me thinks I should take you home."
"Me thinks you should ease up." She closed her eyes and snuggled lovingly deeper into his pants, and eventually made Aoshi jump out in surprise.
*****
"Yahiko. . ."
"Sanoske. . ."
Yahiko giggled lightly, tickling Sano's stiff, tight stomach with his fingertips, sending shivers down his spine. Sanoske felt his reach go lower through his tingling fit, and stopped momentarily, his face turning a but red. Yahiko continued traveling down to his waist. And-
Sano grasped his hand firmly.
"Sano-chan." Yahiko complained, pouting impatiently.
"Kenji's here. We can't. Not until Kaoru gets back."
"But then you'll complain that she'll hear us."
"Maybe I will. But now I'm complaining because a four-year-old is in the next room, sleeping. Do you know how hard it would be to explain to Kenji what we were doing if he walked in?"
Yahiko grinned. "Not very."
Sano playfully moved Yahiko's face into the couch cushions. "Hentai baka. They have Sex Ed. In public schools for a reason you know. He shouldn't have to learn until he HAS to learn."
Yahiko sat up, then laid himself down on Sano, his head resting on his sculpted abdomen. "Something happened today, Sano-chan. Something at the pre-school."
Sanoske patted his satin-like hair, ruffling the layers. "What?"
"Well, there's a little boy there named Soujiro. He seems like a pretty good kid. He smiles a lot. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen him cry before. Not even when he gets hurt." Yahiko stopped to smile. "And when kids push him, he pushes back. He sees nothing wrong with it, and sometimes I don't either, but we have to teach them not to hit, you know. But he keeps on hitting them right back.
"But lately he's been coming in late with scratches and bruises all over his arms and face. I ask him, and he says his father is teaching him a lesson. He says his dad is teaching to be stronger. I'm getting nervous."
"Talk to the parents." Sano suggested, his other hand caressing Yahiko's spine. Yahiko smiled faintly, his eyes closing in the pleasure.
"I thought about that, but his father just got out of the hospital. He was in a horrible fire. I hear he has burns all over. I suppose I could talk to his mother." Yahiko began to fall asleep, when Sano shook him slightly. He glared sleepily up at him. "What is it?"
"I'm thinking of having a bath after Kaoru picks up Kenji." He looked down, grinning mischievously. "Wanna join me?"
Yahiko laughed quietly into the corner of the white shirt that was unopened and hanging on Sano's delicately tan chest. "Do I ever."
A shrill rang came from the phone, startling them. Sanoske reached over and picked the phone off of the hook, bringing the receiver to his ear. "Hello?"
"Hi, Sano!"
"Oh, Kaoru. Hey, what's up?"
"Nothing. Hey, I was wondering if you could watch Kenji tonight? I'm not feeling very well."
Sanoske's heart cracked as his eyes drooped in disappointment. "Sure, no problem."
Kaoru's voice came out slightly concerned. "You sure?"
"Yea. It's fine."
"Okay. Thank you so much, Sano. Arigato gozaimasu."
"Any time. Bye."
"Bye."
Sano placed the phone back on the charger, sulking bitterly. "Tsu." He cursed under his breath. Yahiko played with his strong muscles caringly.
"What is it?"
He sighed. "No bath tonight."
*****
"Here, let me help you."
"Really, Aoshi, I'm fine."
"Come on Kaoru, look at yourself. You can barely walk. Let me help you up the stairs."
"Just. . . oh, fine." Kaoru allowed him to take her arm and wrap it around his shoulders. He took her waist and pulled her frame closer to his. Kaoru's faced flushed red, embarrassed how uncoordinated she was after drinking. She could fool an officer out of DUI if she had TRIED. Luckily, Aoshi drove her home, saying he would help get her car in the morning.
"Here we are." Aoshi helped her up the last step and ushered her to her door. She took out her keys unsteadily and watched the door glide open, her eyes blank and empty. Her heart pounded deeply and slowly within her. Kaoru swiveled and embraced Aoshi, pressing her face to his chest. He staggered momentarily, surprised by the sudden hug, but patted her back and let his head fall, their ebony hair blending.
That was when Aoshi felt her lips brush against his.
He had no time to move or even realize what was happening until after Kaoru had forced a kiss, strong and passionate. Aoshi's eyes widened after he had time to take in what was happening. He pulled her away, her face confused as if she couldn't figure out what was wrong.
"What are you doing, Kaoru!?" His voice cracked.
"Aoshi, please. I'm in so much pain." She pulled him closer. "I hurt so bad. Please help ease the pain. Please make it go away."
"Kaoru. . ."
"Please. . ." She moved up and smothered him in another kiss, wilder and harder than before. Aoshi could taste the sake on her tongue, bitter- sweet and delicious. His eye softened lightly as he pulled away, but with less rejection.
"This is not right. Your husband. . ."
". . .Is not here." Kaoru completed abruptly for him.
"Kaoru. . ." Aoshi tried to resist once more.
"Aoshi. . ." Kaoru tugged his jacket and forced him into her apartment, her eyes fixed on his strong chest. He followed, dazed and puzzled. As much as he wanted to deny it and scream how juvenile it was, he missed this. He missed those middle-school and high-school nights with begotten lovers that would never return to him.
And so, as much as he wanted to run, he closed the door behind him, and locked it.
*****
Tomoko-chan: Ooh! I'm so mean! Yesh, to many of you guys' pleasure (or pain) there will be a lemon in the next chapter. I might have to post it on my live-journal or something, thanks to FFN's new policy. Fuddruckers! Well, I might post it here. We'll see. One thing is for sure, I'll need to do some "research" on lemons to make this as amusing as possible. If you know any good, great, or oh-my-god-this-made-me-so-hot lemons, please send me a link or address along with a review! Blah. I'm so tired. I'm writing this at 11:30. Usually I'm watching Adult Swim on Cartoon Network by now, but eh. I had to work today, with many escaping animals and screaming children, mind you!
I need chocolate.
Me sleep now.
Hee hee. Chimps in black boots.
*****
Kaoru wiggled in Kenshin's tight, protective grasp, struggling to free her self. He smiled cruelly as an evil chuckle rose in his throat, deep and meaningful. Her eyes widened in fear; she had never heard him laugh like that. His laughs were always bright and airy and were let out at just the right moment, accompanied by his sweet smiles. Like candy, she noted.
But now his fiery hair loomed loosely over her like a haunting flame, burning her skin and heating it with fear. His gold-engulfed eyes weighted her with the metal, keeping her body between him and the floor. She knew that the angel of death had come for her. Kenshin would eventually finish with her and grab a nearby needle and fill it with chemicals and punch it into her, or grab the chair next to them and whack her over the head until she went into a coma. Or something witty and painful like that. It would have to be, for Kaoru didn't think she could ever hurt Kenshin back.
But could destiny be changed?
She raised her right knee quickly into Kenshin's groin and observed his eyes widen and grow blank in pain. He fell to one side, clutching his crotch, while Kaoru shot up and ran to the wall again, panting. Sweat beaded her forehead as she watched Kenshin's agony. He had closed his eyes now and laid there, hands loosely placed below his waist.
"Why. . .?" Kaoru managed, gasping for air.
"Why what?" His eyes remained closed.
"Why everything? Why me and Kenji? Why that whore? Why the scars on your cheek?" Tears lingered on her eyelashes.
Kenshin griped the metal railing for his hospital bed and pulled him self to his feet, shaky and unsteady like a newborn colt. He wobbled momentarily, his head down and his hair covering all signs of a face.
"Why?" He asked her, aggravation in his tone. "You mean you don't remember yet?" Kaoru fumbled behind her back for the door knob. Her brow furrowed in frightened confusion.
Kenshin chuckled, his hair still hiding the obvious smile on his face. Kaoru nearly wished aloud that his head would stay down. Though it lolled to the sides occasionally, disturbing her, she did not want to see what the hair hid. "Because it's fun to remember, Kaoru. Then I can change it all I want. You know, experiment with all of our lives, so to speak. You wanna know why, Kaoru? Little Miss Kaoru? Kaoru-dono?"
Her eyes widened. He hadn't called her that for so long. Her heart tore.
His head rose, exposing a twisted, insane grin. Kaoru couldn't bear a gasp. A sick terror rose in her throat, releasing as a horrified squawk. Inside, she screamed, 'My Kenshin! Oh, my darling! My baby. . . what the fuck did you do to my baby!?' She wanted to run up to him screaming like a mad-man, and hold him as she did so, so they could be insane together at least.
But even in her thoughts, she was afraid to touch him.
"Because I think it's FUN."
Kaoru looked at him, and saw the blood dripping from his hands.
She screamed, opened the door, and ran screeching for her life out into the hallway.
*****
"Aoshi-chan."
Aoshi's gaze shot from the magazine to Misao instantly, his instincts picking up her voice at the first note. He dropped the thin, badly bound media source and wrapped his arms around her, closing his eyes tightly. "Thank Kami-sama. . ." He breathed in relief. Misao hardly responded, and only patted his back with a faint smile in return. Pulling apart their embrace, he stared at her, scolding softly. "Why aren't you in a bed?"
"I'm not hurt." She answered simply, shrugging her shoulders as if it were nothing. "I had nothing wrong with me, so they just let me go. All I did was faint. That's all."
"Why did you go to his house anyway?" Aoshi kept his hold on her, forcing her to look back into his eyes. He knew she felt uncomfortable, staring back at people, but he knew that's a true sign of her truthfulness.
"Well," Her heart and mind were having totally different conversations. "He's my. . ."
::Lover::
"Friend, so I wondered if he was okay enough so we could. . ."
::Become one again. To loose ourselves once more::
"Catch a movie or something. I didn't want to call, because it was a little early when I would have called, and I was worried. . ."
::That his wife would come in and see us, naked and clean and pure, just like Kami-sama made us. But he made us to be ashamed in ourselves that way. We would cover ourselves, not to hide from each other, but only from her. She didn't understand::
"That he had work or something. It was late-afternoon when I thought about going, so I figured it was about right to. . ."
::See if he felt the same for me::
"Go over and ask." She completed finally, feeling like she had no air in her chest. Aoshi brushed a strand of charcoal hair from her face, which was nearly identical to his. The emerald in his gaze calmed and frightened her at the same time, as if she were being presented a huge, expensive precious stone. She shot her own stare to the floor, afraid her faded, tired blue would give away something. Aoshi smiled, and engulfed her in another hug.
"Let's go home." He spoke by her ear, sounding calm and collected as Misao felt ready to collapse inside. Tears wet the corners of her eyes. She felt like she was five again, so it was okay to cry for no reason.
"Aoshi-sempai. . ." She buried her face into his black jacket and cried.
*****
Kaoru pulled out her cell phone, but did not know who to call.
She sat in her car, still in the hospital parking lot, holding her armor-black phone blankly, wondering who was there to catch her as she began to fall. The insanity in his eyes still burned her soul. She breathed hard, trying to rid her mind of the sight. She could feel the hate in his being. She could taste the blood on his tongue. She smelled the sweat against his fevered skin, tingling with every move she made. He wanted more. She knew.
She was never more disturbed in her life.
She was positive that there was no blood on his hands, and yet there was. There was so much. It gathered and fell into disgusting piles by his feet, dripping in scarlet fullness. Blood from his past. From those moments in time Kaoru could not find. There was blood. It was there.
She was sure of it.
Kaoru took the ragged paper from her purse and looked it over, trying to decipher the digits in the night. She did not want to turn on her car light; the dark was fine. Besides, Kenshin had hurt her in the light. What if he came back to her in the light again? No, she couldn't trust the light again.
An unknown tear fell from her eyes, blemishing the last number. She hardly cared, but she was disappointed that she might not be able to call him. It was hard enough to read in this darkness, but to read faded numerals was a little more difficult. She wasn't even sure she wanted to call anyone. Perhaps she would just stay there all night in her car, and it would be good enough.
But, oh, how she ached! Her heart crackled like rice cereal in her chest, the cuts swerving and deepening within her. Her body was so tired of it all. This running around and falling to the ground in tears and being hit. . . she was exhausted. Her mind was faint and distant, loosing consciousness.
The buttons of the phone glowed in char-truce light as she dialed the number.
*****
"Hello?"
"Aoshi. . ."
His eyes widened briefly as he grasped the black-painted desk phone. His mouth grew to a small smile that wrapped faintly around his teeth. "Kaoru! I didn't think you would call so early after we met. Good thing I just got home. I don't too far from the hospital." He leaned against the mahogany bookcase, filled with rows and columns of thick leather-bound books. "Not that I don't mind you calling, or anything." He laughed nervously. "So, how are you? How is your husband?"
Kaoru smiled quietly at the sound of his laugh, but it slipped away and shattered in her heart. She didn't want to cry in front of him again, but it seemed so hard to hold them inside. The almost burned. She covered her nose and sniffled, hoping he wouldn't hear.
But he did.
His eyes lowered in concern. "Kaoru? What's wrong?"
She drew her hand to her mouth, droplets oozing from her tear ducts. "Aoshi. . ." She started again, her fingers muffling the words. "His eyes, Aoshi. His eyes. They hurt. He was crazy, but I couldn't scream. I couldn't scream for the longest time. I couldn't understand it. I didn't know why he changed. He started talking about messing with peoples lives, and remembering. . ." She paused to breathe, her face red and hot. "And then he hit me. . ."
"He HIT you!?" Aoshi nearly screamed.
"He looked so weak, then he just stood up and he kissed me. I wanted it, but I couldn't feel right. He didn't FEEL right when he did it. He hurt me, so I pushed him away. But he didn't like that at all." She moved her hand to finger her waist. She held herself. "I knew he wanted to kill me. He wanted to kill me and love me at the same time."
"Kaoru, where are you?"
"Still at the hospital."
"You're not. . ."
"No. I'm not still with him. If I were, I'd probably be dead now."
"Stay there. I'm coming to get you."
"I'm in my car. . ."
"I don't care!" He yelled, slamming a hand onto the desk. "Stay there. I'll find you. I'll get you. Okay?"
She nodded, aware he couldn't see her. "Okay."
"I'll be there soon. It's imperative you don't move."
"I won't."
"Promise?"
"I promise."
"See you soon." He hesitated before hanging up the phone, and waited for Kaoru to hang up first before he did so. He sighed as he grabbed his black leather jacket from the coat hanger by the door, and Misao poked her head from the doorway, hiding herself with a green towel.
"Where are you going?"
"Out."
"When will you be back?"
"I don't know."
"Do you know anything?" She smiled, accidentally letting the towel droop and exposing part of her milky-white breast. He smiled grimly, remembering how he used to bathe his baby sister, her chest flat as a board and her woman hood perfectly hairless, and how those days were gone. She would show complete strangers her nakedness, but would scream if he came in while she was changing or bathing.
"Not yet." He opened the door, the smirk still on his face.
*****
She had left her car a while ago and was now sitting on the curb in front of the hospital. She didn't want to stay in there anymore; it was too cramped. Kaoru sighed into the sleeves of her sweatshirt, which she had just taken off of her waist and pulled it over her. Kaoru shivered still. She would have to eat or sleep soon; she could almost feel the energy dripping out of her body. Her eyelids fell temptingly, but lifted again at the sound approaching her. It sounded like the jingle of wind chimes, but maybe a little bit heavier.
Then Aoshi emerged from the darkness, his keys clinking under his palm.
He shoved them in his pocket and ran to her, bowing down to her level to grasp her shoulders. "Are you okay? Where did he hit you?" He demanded, his eyes wide and scolding. Kaoru's eyes stayed nearly closed, as if she were bored.
"I'm fine. He just hit my face."
"I see. . ." He moved a strand of her hair away and noted the redness on her right cheek. He stroked it gently and caressed it with his finger tips. Kaoru closed her eyes, allowing the faint pleasure of his softness to caress her. Tears slipped without realization from her lashes, wetting his hand. He stared at it.
"What. . ."
She stopped him and grasped his hand. Kaoru took it and placed it on her heart, her pulse beating smooth and even. Her mouth was an expressionless line, but her eyes dripped with sadness.
"Do you feel that?"
"Yes."
"Doesn't it feel broken?"
"A little."
"Can you fix that?"
"I don't know."
"I'm hungry." She said randomly.
"I know a good Japanese restaurant, if you want to go."
"Yes please."
He smiled, allowing her to hold his hand to her chest for a while. "You said you wouldn't move." He hinted. She gave the air of a sigh, her head bowing a little.
"I wanted to give the light a second chance."
*****
"More sake, please." Kaoru raised a hand to the waitress, who bowed in understanding. Aoshi held his face and smiled, his tempura getting cold after not being eaten for so long. Kaoru, however, had eaten almost three times as much as he had ordered, complete with appetizers, dessert, and drinks. Then again, he had not ordered very much, but still, she ate as if it were her last meal.
::You shouldn't drink so much sake, that you shouldn't.::
"You shouldn't drink so much." Aoshi stated, not quite sure why.
"You sound like Kenshin." Kaoru retorted over the rim of the glass after another gulp. Her cheeks had grown rosy and soft-looking, and her eyes gleamed like sapphires at the bottom of a lake. She set down the glass, a curved smile on her face. She laughed.
He raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"
The low chuckle in her throat became a gut-bursting guffaw in seconds. She held her side as tears squeezed from the corners of her eyes. Aoshi blushed when he noticed the stares emanating from the people around him. He just couldn't figure out what was so damn funny.
"What?" He demanded again. Kaoru's laughs subsided a bit and she wiped her eyes.
"I just now realized," She started, her hand moving from her stomach to her lap. "That I know you better than my own husband. I even think I like you better." She smiled. Aoshi stared her down, serious.
"Don't say that. You're going through a rough time with your husband. Now isn't the time to have doubts with him. He'll be fine. YOU'LL be fine."
She looked at the tatami-clad floor. "No. I'm divorcing him. We are supposed to go to the attorney's office tomorrow, but I don't think that will work out. They might let him out, but I don't think they will." She stood and wobbled briefly before walking to the other side of the table to join Aoshi. Kaoru kneeled and leaned her head on his shoulder as she clutched the sleeve of his deep, blue shirt.
Aoshi blushed a deep pink, his eyes drifting to her. "Are you sleepy?"
She nodded faintly, placing her head in his lap. "A little. But I. . . I just hurt. I'm tired and I hurt. I'm tired in my body, I'm tired in my mind, I'm tired in my heart." She hugged his waist, cuddling into his black denim jeans. "And it hurts. I'm tired of this pain."
He averted his gaze, trying to look busy with his meal, picking loosely. Kaoru squeezed him harder.
"Me thinks you're embarrassed." She chuckled.
"Oh, yea, well me thinks you've had enough. Me thinks I should take you home."
"Me thinks you should ease up." She closed her eyes and snuggled lovingly deeper into his pants, and eventually made Aoshi jump out in surprise.
*****
"Yahiko. . ."
"Sanoske. . ."
Yahiko giggled lightly, tickling Sano's stiff, tight stomach with his fingertips, sending shivers down his spine. Sanoske felt his reach go lower through his tingling fit, and stopped momentarily, his face turning a but red. Yahiko continued traveling down to his waist. And-
Sano grasped his hand firmly.
"Sano-chan." Yahiko complained, pouting impatiently.
"Kenji's here. We can't. Not until Kaoru gets back."
"But then you'll complain that she'll hear us."
"Maybe I will. But now I'm complaining because a four-year-old is in the next room, sleeping. Do you know how hard it would be to explain to Kenji what we were doing if he walked in?"
Yahiko grinned. "Not very."
Sano playfully moved Yahiko's face into the couch cushions. "Hentai baka. They have Sex Ed. In public schools for a reason you know. He shouldn't have to learn until he HAS to learn."
Yahiko sat up, then laid himself down on Sano, his head resting on his sculpted abdomen. "Something happened today, Sano-chan. Something at the pre-school."
Sanoske patted his satin-like hair, ruffling the layers. "What?"
"Well, there's a little boy there named Soujiro. He seems like a pretty good kid. He smiles a lot. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen him cry before. Not even when he gets hurt." Yahiko stopped to smile. "And when kids push him, he pushes back. He sees nothing wrong with it, and sometimes I don't either, but we have to teach them not to hit, you know. But he keeps on hitting them right back.
"But lately he's been coming in late with scratches and bruises all over his arms and face. I ask him, and he says his father is teaching him a lesson. He says his dad is teaching to be stronger. I'm getting nervous."
"Talk to the parents." Sano suggested, his other hand caressing Yahiko's spine. Yahiko smiled faintly, his eyes closing in the pleasure.
"I thought about that, but his father just got out of the hospital. He was in a horrible fire. I hear he has burns all over. I suppose I could talk to his mother." Yahiko began to fall asleep, when Sano shook him slightly. He glared sleepily up at him. "What is it?"
"I'm thinking of having a bath after Kaoru picks up Kenji." He looked down, grinning mischievously. "Wanna join me?"
Yahiko laughed quietly into the corner of the white shirt that was unopened and hanging on Sano's delicately tan chest. "Do I ever."
A shrill rang came from the phone, startling them. Sanoske reached over and picked the phone off of the hook, bringing the receiver to his ear. "Hello?"
"Hi, Sano!"
"Oh, Kaoru. Hey, what's up?"
"Nothing. Hey, I was wondering if you could watch Kenji tonight? I'm not feeling very well."
Sanoske's heart cracked as his eyes drooped in disappointment. "Sure, no problem."
Kaoru's voice came out slightly concerned. "You sure?"
"Yea. It's fine."
"Okay. Thank you so much, Sano. Arigato gozaimasu."
"Any time. Bye."
"Bye."
Sano placed the phone back on the charger, sulking bitterly. "Tsu." He cursed under his breath. Yahiko played with his strong muscles caringly.
"What is it?"
He sighed. "No bath tonight."
*****
"Here, let me help you."
"Really, Aoshi, I'm fine."
"Come on Kaoru, look at yourself. You can barely walk. Let me help you up the stairs."
"Just. . . oh, fine." Kaoru allowed him to take her arm and wrap it around his shoulders. He took her waist and pulled her frame closer to his. Kaoru's faced flushed red, embarrassed how uncoordinated she was after drinking. She could fool an officer out of DUI if she had TRIED. Luckily, Aoshi drove her home, saying he would help get her car in the morning.
"Here we are." Aoshi helped her up the last step and ushered her to her door. She took out her keys unsteadily and watched the door glide open, her eyes blank and empty. Her heart pounded deeply and slowly within her. Kaoru swiveled and embraced Aoshi, pressing her face to his chest. He staggered momentarily, surprised by the sudden hug, but patted her back and let his head fall, their ebony hair blending.
That was when Aoshi felt her lips brush against his.
He had no time to move or even realize what was happening until after Kaoru had forced a kiss, strong and passionate. Aoshi's eyes widened after he had time to take in what was happening. He pulled her away, her face confused as if she couldn't figure out what was wrong.
"What are you doing, Kaoru!?" His voice cracked.
"Aoshi, please. I'm in so much pain." She pulled him closer. "I hurt so bad. Please help ease the pain. Please make it go away."
"Kaoru. . ."
"Please. . ." She moved up and smothered him in another kiss, wilder and harder than before. Aoshi could taste the sake on her tongue, bitter- sweet and delicious. His eye softened lightly as he pulled away, but with less rejection.
"This is not right. Your husband. . ."
". . .Is not here." Kaoru completed abruptly for him.
"Kaoru. . ." Aoshi tried to resist once more.
"Aoshi. . ." Kaoru tugged his jacket and forced him into her apartment, her eyes fixed on his strong chest. He followed, dazed and puzzled. As much as he wanted to deny it and scream how juvenile it was, he missed this. He missed those middle-school and high-school nights with begotten lovers that would never return to him.
And so, as much as he wanted to run, he closed the door behind him, and locked it.
*****
Tomoko-chan: Ooh! I'm so mean! Yesh, to many of you guys' pleasure (or pain) there will be a lemon in the next chapter. I might have to post it on my live-journal or something, thanks to FFN's new policy. Fuddruckers! Well, I might post it here. We'll see. One thing is for sure, I'll need to do some "research" on lemons to make this as amusing as possible. If you know any good, great, or oh-my-god-this-made-me-so-hot lemons, please send me a link or address along with a review! Blah. I'm so tired. I'm writing this at 11:30. Usually I'm watching Adult Swim on Cartoon Network by now, but eh. I had to work today, with many escaping animals and screaming children, mind you!
I need chocolate.
Me sleep now.