75
Angel stepped into Rose's office the first day after the week end. He moved so quietly and she was so intent on what she was doing that she didn't hear him enter.
"Rose?" Angel said softly.
Rose sat bolt upright with a startled yelp. She sat there looking at him a moment, hand pressed to her chest. "Why does it take so long to slow back down?" she inquired.
He almost asked what she was talking about when he realized she was talking about the frantic beat of her heart, which was quite audible to him. "Adrenalin," he replied. "A chemical the human body produces in times of stress. If you want the particulars, you'll have to ask someone else. My knowledge of biology has always been more.., basic."
"So what brings you to my tiny piece of Wolfram and Hart?" Rose asked. "Aside from trying to scare me into fits."
He perched on the corner of her desk, and Rose wondered what it was about nearly every male that came into her office that they chose to sit there rather than a chair. "I wanted to ask how your research is going," he answered.
Rose made a face. "Very discouraging. If it was for anything less important, I think I'd give up."
Angel subjected her to a careful scrutiny. "Is that why you have those dark circles under your eyes?" he queried. "Or was it something that happened to you over the weekend? I know you didn't have them Friday night."
"To tell the truth, I..," Rose began, then suddenly broke off, looking very alert. "Spike? It's very rude to eavesdrop, love."
Spike slowly appeared. Extremities first, then working inward. He beamed with self-congratulation. "Pretty good, innit? 'Lo, luv." He went to stand right behind Rose's chair, hovering over her protectively.
"Spectacular," Rose agreed, but without any enthusiasm.
"You don't like it." Spike's face fell. "Thought it was kind of impressive, myself," he muttered.
"But a bit juvenile, don't you think," Angel remarked. He flinched slightly as the toe of Rose's shoe connected with the bottom of his foot. "Still, given your current limitations, yeah, I guess it was impressive." He gave Rose a cautious look. So, she was trying to protect Spike's feelings. It did nothing for him to see the smirk on Spike's face that showed he had witnessed the byplay.
"Am I interrupting something?" Spike asked. "It's just that I thought that what with Rose being on her lunch break and all..," The sentence and Spike trailed off into nothing simultaneously.
Angel was stunned. Tact from Spike? He wondered which was the greater influence, a soul, or Rose. "He's really gone, isn't he?"
Rose's eyes grew distant for a moment. "He is. I don't know why it is, but I always know when Spike is around. Always."
"Do you want to finish what you were telling me before Spike arrived and departed?" Angel prompted. "A reason for those dark circles?"
"I was contacted again," Rose confessed. "By my peers. They know that I'm in love with Spike, but they gave me no indication whatsoever as to whether or not they consider it a point in his favor." She closed her eyes briefly, fighting down a sudden surge of panic. "In fact, they said little or nothing, and when I was there, I couldn't..," Once again she had to find a word in human speech to describe something distinctly inhuman. "I couldn't feel them. It was like a conversation with another human being. Communicating, but not truly connecting. Oh dear, I'm putting this very badly, I'm afraid."
"Maybe not," Angel encouraged her. "Are you saying that the rest of the Powers are distancing themselves from you?"
"Something like that," Rose conceded. "And I don't understand why. It scares me, for myself, and even more so for Spike. The only ray of hope in the whole situation is that they didn't call me back. If I'm still here, it means that a decision hasn't been arrived at yet. It means that I may still have a chance to sway them. But I should be a part of that decision."
"Has there ever been a decision made on anything that excluded one of you?" Angel asked.
"Never," Rose stated flatly. "Not once in forever. If one of us was away, like I am now, that one was always called back to take part in the decision. I don't know what's going on, Liam. For the first time ever, I really don't know what's going on. And I haven't been sleeping well as a result."
"Maybe it's a positive sign," Angel suggested, but without much hope.
"And maybe it's not," Rose sighed sadly. She seemed calm enough, but Angel could once again hear the frenzied thump, thump, thump of Rose's heart.
&&&&&&
The week was dragging by at a plodding pace. Rose was now like so many of the people she had seen, merely going through the motions. She only came alive when Spike was around, and did her best to cover in front of him. The only work she could really throw herself into was her research on Spike's behalf. In addition to sleeping poorly, she was scarcely eating, and soon the effects of such a lifestyle began to tell on her.
Wesley had called Rose to ask her to bring some forgotten papers to a senior staff meeting, so pretty much everyone who was anyone, i.e. Angel's original team was there when she fainted.
Angel whipped off his jacket and folded it into a pillow and tucked it under Rose's head. "Wes, call the company doctor and tell him that if he's not up here in five minutes, he's fired."
Wesley nodded and went to the phone.
Rose started muttering, without regaining consciousness. "He doesn't deserve what's happened to him. Everyone I've spoken to agrees with me." She began thrashing around, and everyone gathered around, wanting to help, but helpless. Angel considered that if this was what Rose's nights had been like of late, it was no wonder she was starting to look like a zombie.
"Please," the still unconscious Rose pleaded. "Let me restore him." Lorne, ever sympathetic, as well as empathetic, knelt on the other side of her and took one of her hands and gently stroked her forehead.
"You can't make decisions without me," Rose's midday nightmare went on. "I am a part. We are all Powers, together."
At that revelation, Angel glanced around at his companions, and saw that not only had they heard it, but it had struck a chord. Suddenly, Rose shrieked out, "No!" and sat bolt upright. A moment later, her open eyes began to focus.
Any discussion was delayed by the arrival of the doctor. He gave Rose a quick once over, and asked a few questions that Rose answered automatically.
"Stress," the doctor pronounced. "Resulting in disrupted sleeping and eating habits. Not uncommon, these days. I'll prescribe a mild sedative for her. That, and eating on a more consistent basis should help. But it's only palliative. If she can't resolve her problem enough to get her lifestyle back in order, I'd suggest therapy." He looked at Rose again. "Not everyone is emotionally equipped to work here," he observed, recalling seeing Rose after her run-in with a demon. "She may not be, sir, and it may be in her best interests for you to consider letting her go." Angel began to glower, and the doctor backed down. "Get her home, get some food and the sedative into her. She needs food and rest. But most of all, she needs some peace." His job done, he left.
As one, all eyes turned from Rose to Angel, with more than a hint of accusation. "Later," he said firmly. "I need to get her home first." A thought struck him. "She ought to have someone to stay with her."
"I'll go." Lorne volunteered before anyone else could open their mouths. "My department can run itself for the rest of the day, and the only other one of us that I suspect that Spike wouldn't object to is Fred, and our princess is much too busy to take the day off."
"Fine." Angel helped Rose to her feet, half carrying her. He just wanted to get out of here and have a quick word with Rose, if possible before the barrage of questions began raining down. He set such a brisk pace that he ended up having to carry Rose, and Lorne was practically running to keep up.
Angel was thankful that Lorne kept silent, he wasn't sure he could cope right now, the way it was all blowing up in his face. He handed Rose in to the demon, preferring her safely in the back seat with someone to keep an eye on her so he could concentrate on his driving.
Since she had regained consciousness, Rose had said nothing other than to answer the doctor's questions. As far as Angel knew, she had no idea what she had let slip while she had been out of it. She looked drained, almost literally, to Angel's eye, who had seen a few drained people. Usually ones that he had drained.
Lorne tagged along like a puppy while Angel carried Rose up to her apartment. As he headed into her bedroom, he said, "Lorne, could you give us a minute?"
Lorne shrugged and stopped where he was. He glanced around and saw the picture on the wall and went over and began studying it as if there would be a test on it at the end of the day.
Angel set Rose down on her bed. "Rose," he said. "Are you up to talking? I need to have a word with you before I go back."
"I can talk." Rose's voice was lusterless, lacking timbre.
"Do you have any idea what you said while you were unconscious?" Angel asked.
"I talked?" Rose looked confused. "How can you talk when you're not awake?"
"We don't have time to go into that now," Angel replied. "The point is, you said something about being a Power. Everyone in the office heard you. And they put two and two together. I may be able to keep them quiet, I might not, just because it's so big that someone might let something slip when they don't realize that Spike is around."
Rose gasped and fell back on the pillows. "Spike can't find out, Liam, he can't. You've got to ask them not to speak of it, at all."
"He's going to find out sometime," Angel pointed out.
"Yes," she agreed. "But just before I leave. It has to be that way. No one was supposed to know." She covered her face with her hands. "What have I done?"
"We'll figure out a way to work things out," Angel promised. "If I see Spike, do you want me to send him here?"
"Do you think you could keep him away?" she asked. "If the tables were turned, I know that I would want to be with..,"
"Rose!" Spike came through a wall. "They said you'd fainted." He sat on the edge of the bed. "You want to take a powder now, mate?" He addressed Angel without looking at him. "The A team is here now."
Angel got up. He'd better get back to the firm and start effecting some damage control before things got out of hand. He trusted his team to be discreet, but one word at the wrong time with the wrong person in hearing distance, and there'd be hell to pay. "Make sure you follow the doctor's instructions, Rose," he ordered, as he reached the doorway. "Lorne will stay here in case you need any help." He spared a glance for Spike who just sat there, gazing intently at the wan figure on the bed. "If you're not feeling up to it, take the day off tomorrow. You're not going to be any good to anybody, least of all yourself unless you take care."
But evidently Spike had been listening. "She'll be a good girl," he promised. "Because you're going to do it for me, aren't you, pet?" The last was obviously directed at Rose. For good measure, he said to Angel, "Now bugger off, ya poncey git."
Lorne was still absorbed in his study of the picture on the wall when Angel re-entered the living room, but he was aware of the vampire's presence. "This is big league stuff, isn't it?" He turned to face Angel. "I hope I'm right in assuming that you'll fill me in tomorrow?"
"What I can," Angel promised. "Just make sure she takes her medication and gets something to eat. I have to get back to the office now and try to..,"
"Put the genie back in the bottle?" Lorne asked. "Easier said than done, Angelcakes. As for the Rosebud, I promise she's in good hands."
&&&&&&
When Angel got back to the conference room, the remaining trio were still waiting expectantly. At least, he thought with relief, they hadn't been out and about and speculating where other ears could pick up on things.
"How long have you known, Angel?" Wes asked quietly.
"About a week," he answered. He didn't even try to lie, it had gone to far to be covered effectively with lies now. "She wasn't supposed to tell anyone, but she needed someone to talk to."
"Well why didn't she tell Spike?" Gunn inquired. "The two of them being so tight, I would have thought that he was the first one she'd clue in."
"Spike is definitely off limits as far as telling him anything goes," Angel said firmly. "In fact, I'd like to ask you to keep it all within the confines of this room. Don't even talk about it among yourselves. It would be a big help if you could all just forget it, but I don't suppose that's an option."
"Forget that I had a sleepover with one of The Powers That Be?" Fred said incredulously. "I think it would be easier to forget my name."
"But what is one of the Powers doing here?" Wesley wanted to know. "It must be something really serious, for one of them to step in personally."
"It's about Spike," Angel answered. He sat down at the table and rested his chin on his hands. "Evidently there's been some discussion about whether or not Spike got a raw deal out of saving the world. Rose is here to try to prove her case, but she got a little more involved than she was supposed to."
"Falling head over heels for the guy is not what I'd call a little more involved," Gunn pointed out. "Do you buy that stuff, boss?"
"If I didn't, I'd be calling the nearest mental hospital," Angel responded. "Because Rose really believes it. But I believe it too. I think the best thing we can do is just go on as before and pretend that Rose is just another employee."
"Wait a minute." Fred had a thoughtful look on her face. "Is there anyone here that Rose hasn't asked about whether or not they felt that Spike deserved to go to hell?"
"Me," Gunn admitted. "But then, I haven't been around her much. What about the rest of you?"
"She asked me," Wes replied.
"And me," Angel said. "And I think she probably got the same answer from all of us."
"But will that be enough to convince the rest of the Powers?" Wesley wondered.
"And what is it going to do to Spike when she has to go back?" Fred mused. As Wes and Gunn looked at her querulously, she asked, "Well, she will have to go back, won't she?"
"She'll have to go back," Angel confirmed.