Part 6: Telling The Truth..
The truth will set you free. I have lied to myself for so long. I don't even know what is the truth any more.why then can I not let myself hear what Aeryn's truth is.
Aeryn entered her quarters to find Chiana sitting on her bed. Jack lay there so innocent of the cruel universe around him. Tears streaming down her face, the last of her anger fading as she stared down at her beautiful son. Frell, she now had doubts if it was the right thing to bring Jack back to this mad man who once had been the warmest, loving being in the universe.
How could he change so much that you couldn't even see the wonderful person any longer. Realization came to her as she remembered what the other John had said. 'You are my guiding star, my anchor that keeps me from drifting in the madness we call life." She sat down with the painful thought of just how much she had contributed in creating this new John Crichton. Fresh tears flowed with the pain of the whole frelling situation.
Chiana demanded to know what the farbot had said. Just shaking her head, Aeryn picked up Jack and placed him in his bed. Brushing his hair off his forehead she bent down and kissed him. 'I love you, Jack.' As she started to leave his room she saw the brightly colored DRD sitting in the corner watching Jack. A faint smile flickered over her lips to only to return to a saddened frown.
Going back into her room she found Chiana had left. Normally she would have been concerned at what the Nebari would do, but she was drained to such an emotional point that she just didn't care anymore.
LOCK DOWN:
John had gone back to his quarters to sleep. He too felt emotionally and physically drained. Right now he felt nothing but numbness. As he changed for bed, he heard the locks on his door activating. Turning he saw Chiana standing on the other side of the grid watching him as if he was a Peacekeeper.
"What are you doing, Chiana?"
He crossed over to the door. "Pilot, unlock my door." The silence wasn't broken with a response. "Pilot, come on man."
"Not this time Crichton. You are going to hear the truth no matter if you want to or not." Chiana danced back and forth in front of the door.
"Give it a rest, Pip. This has nothing to do with you. This is between Aeryn and me." He said in a tired voice.
"That is were you are wrong. you have hurt Jackie with your cold attitude. Aeryn has tried so hard to teach Jack about you. Now you are going to hear the truth about your son." She sat just in front of the door. "Did you ever wonder about Jack's conception and birth? No, you are to busy feeling sorry for yourself. John Crichton had been wronged. No one has been hurt like me. No one had been abandoned. You fekkik!" Chiana all but yelled at him.
"Fekkik?" He asked confused.
"You are a frelling selfish idiot. How can you deny your son?"
"I don't deny him. Hell, I don't even know him. Aeryn saw to that." John snapped.
"So. That is past history that can't be changed. You should spend sometime with him to get to know him.he can get to know you." She jumped up and swayed back and forth on each word.
"It's not that simple, Chi. How do I know that Aeryn will take him away from me because she gets another urge to find herself." He walked back into his quarters. "I can't love something else only to have it taken away from me again. My heart has been shattered enough- there is hardly any pieces left."
"Look we can stand here and argue this all night and day. Still nothing will change. I just want you to stay in one place keep and your mouth closed. No more whining. This is not about you or Aeryn this is about a life you helped create."
He barked out a dry laugh. "You mean the other me."
"No, now shut your mouth and open your ears. I am going to tell you a story about your son." She settled herself on the floor outside the cell door again. Sighing John gave in to the inevitable. He lay on his bed, throwing his arm over his eyes trying to block the headache that was surely to follow. He remained quiet hoping this would be over soon.
"It started after she left, when she had found out she was pregnat on the command carrier. She just didn't know if it could be John Crichton's. Something about peacekeeper female soldiers and womb stasis." Shaking her head she continued. "Anyway it wasn't long after she joined the rebels that she was betrayed and captured by Commandant Grayza."
John took his arm down, breaking in. "Grayza? That inter- galactic bitch still looking for us?"
"Yes." She said through her teeth. "Now be quiet."
John shrugged his shoulders apologetically. "Now as I was saying. Aeryn was put into the aurora chair to find out where you were. Finding that she didn't know, but that Aeryn was pregnant, Grayza ordered her to be taken to medic bay. They deactivated the status compartment. Aeryn was frantic over what they would do to the child. She wanted to fight and flee but knew she couldn't.
John looked at her with stone-faced. Oh how Chiana wanted to hit him one. "They planned to let the child come to full term. Once it was born they would execute Aeryn and use the child to get you to join them. They really do want you more now then ever."
He held up his hand in her pausing. She snapped. "What?"
"Permission to speak. Even if they used a warning beacon to alert me that I was a father do they think I would just walk in to give myself up with no way my child could be set free and be taken care of? I mean I want my son, but it wouldn't do him any good if I captured too."
"How in the frell am I to know that? These are Peacekeepers we are talking about. You figure it out. Now as I was saying. Aeryn was able to escape."
"How?" John barked out.
"Believe this or not, but by Captain Braca." She paused ready for his next outbreak. She was disappointed when he didn't respond. "Well, anyway."
"You're right I don't believe it. Why in the frell would he help her? And they must be desperate to make that idiot a captain."
"Anywayyy.. he did. She made it back to the rebels who in return helped her to get the hell out of Dodger."
"That's Dodge."
'Yeah. She got a ship and came looking for any of us she could find. She found me stuck on a planet hurt and hiding. Aeryn was pretty far along. She was afraid that the pregnancy was lasting longer then an ordinary sebacean pregnancy. It was then that I decided I would not leave her or Jack. I haven't. I want to help as long as they both need me. It's more I could say for you."
John was staring off into the distance adsorbing it up. Chiana cleared her throat getting his attention. "After Jack was born we stayed hidden until Aeryn felt comfortable becoming a mom. She took to it remarkably well. A few monens after his birth we found transport and started hunting for you. We searched for three long cycles. Each time we would feel we were getting close only to find the trail was cold. I would have given up on you but not Aeryn. I asked her once why she persisted in finding you. It wasn't until a day or so ago that she finally answered my question. You want to know what it was?"
Shaking his head with a shrug he knew she would tell him anyway. "It was because the biggest mistake she had ever made in her life was leaving you and not telling you about Jack. She had to find you so that you and Jack could know each other. That's all she was expecting from you. All she wanted was for Jack to know his father. Now you tell me, Mr. Know-nothing, why in the frell haven't you paid attention to your very own son?"
John leaned back against the wall, not answering. Frell he didn't even know what to say.
"Ahhh! You frelling stupid human." Chiana screamed. She jumped to her feet. "Stay in there till you rot, you drenit. John remained seated as she stormed off.
The truth will set you free. I have lied to myself for so long. I don't even know what is the truth any more.why then can I not let myself hear what Aeryn's truth is.
Aeryn entered her quarters to find Chiana sitting on her bed. Jack lay there so innocent of the cruel universe around him. Tears streaming down her face, the last of her anger fading as she stared down at her beautiful son. Frell, she now had doubts if it was the right thing to bring Jack back to this mad man who once had been the warmest, loving being in the universe.
How could he change so much that you couldn't even see the wonderful person any longer. Realization came to her as she remembered what the other John had said. 'You are my guiding star, my anchor that keeps me from drifting in the madness we call life." She sat down with the painful thought of just how much she had contributed in creating this new John Crichton. Fresh tears flowed with the pain of the whole frelling situation.
Chiana demanded to know what the farbot had said. Just shaking her head, Aeryn picked up Jack and placed him in his bed. Brushing his hair off his forehead she bent down and kissed him. 'I love you, Jack.' As she started to leave his room she saw the brightly colored DRD sitting in the corner watching Jack. A faint smile flickered over her lips to only to return to a saddened frown.
Going back into her room she found Chiana had left. Normally she would have been concerned at what the Nebari would do, but she was drained to such an emotional point that she just didn't care anymore.
LOCK DOWN:
John had gone back to his quarters to sleep. He too felt emotionally and physically drained. Right now he felt nothing but numbness. As he changed for bed, he heard the locks on his door activating. Turning he saw Chiana standing on the other side of the grid watching him as if he was a Peacekeeper.
"What are you doing, Chiana?"
He crossed over to the door. "Pilot, unlock my door." The silence wasn't broken with a response. "Pilot, come on man."
"Not this time Crichton. You are going to hear the truth no matter if you want to or not." Chiana danced back and forth in front of the door.
"Give it a rest, Pip. This has nothing to do with you. This is between Aeryn and me." He said in a tired voice.
"That is were you are wrong. you have hurt Jackie with your cold attitude. Aeryn has tried so hard to teach Jack about you. Now you are going to hear the truth about your son." She sat just in front of the door. "Did you ever wonder about Jack's conception and birth? No, you are to busy feeling sorry for yourself. John Crichton had been wronged. No one has been hurt like me. No one had been abandoned. You fekkik!" Chiana all but yelled at him.
"Fekkik?" He asked confused.
"You are a frelling selfish idiot. How can you deny your son?"
"I don't deny him. Hell, I don't even know him. Aeryn saw to that." John snapped.
"So. That is past history that can't be changed. You should spend sometime with him to get to know him.he can get to know you." She jumped up and swayed back and forth on each word.
"It's not that simple, Chi. How do I know that Aeryn will take him away from me because she gets another urge to find herself." He walked back into his quarters. "I can't love something else only to have it taken away from me again. My heart has been shattered enough- there is hardly any pieces left."
"Look we can stand here and argue this all night and day. Still nothing will change. I just want you to stay in one place keep and your mouth closed. No more whining. This is not about you or Aeryn this is about a life you helped create."
He barked out a dry laugh. "You mean the other me."
"No, now shut your mouth and open your ears. I am going to tell you a story about your son." She settled herself on the floor outside the cell door again. Sighing John gave in to the inevitable. He lay on his bed, throwing his arm over his eyes trying to block the headache that was surely to follow. He remained quiet hoping this would be over soon.
"It started after she left, when she had found out she was pregnat on the command carrier. She just didn't know if it could be John Crichton's. Something about peacekeeper female soldiers and womb stasis." Shaking her head she continued. "Anyway it wasn't long after she joined the rebels that she was betrayed and captured by Commandant Grayza."
John took his arm down, breaking in. "Grayza? That inter- galactic bitch still looking for us?"
"Yes." She said through her teeth. "Now be quiet."
John shrugged his shoulders apologetically. "Now as I was saying. Aeryn was put into the aurora chair to find out where you were. Finding that she didn't know, but that Aeryn was pregnant, Grayza ordered her to be taken to medic bay. They deactivated the status compartment. Aeryn was frantic over what they would do to the child. She wanted to fight and flee but knew she couldn't.
John looked at her with stone-faced. Oh how Chiana wanted to hit him one. "They planned to let the child come to full term. Once it was born they would execute Aeryn and use the child to get you to join them. They really do want you more now then ever."
He held up his hand in her pausing. She snapped. "What?"
"Permission to speak. Even if they used a warning beacon to alert me that I was a father do they think I would just walk in to give myself up with no way my child could be set free and be taken care of? I mean I want my son, but it wouldn't do him any good if I captured too."
"How in the frell am I to know that? These are Peacekeepers we are talking about. You figure it out. Now as I was saying. Aeryn was able to escape."
"How?" John barked out.
"Believe this or not, but by Captain Braca." She paused ready for his next outbreak. She was disappointed when he didn't respond. "Well, anyway."
"You're right I don't believe it. Why in the frell would he help her? And they must be desperate to make that idiot a captain."
"Anywayyy.. he did. She made it back to the rebels who in return helped her to get the hell out of Dodger."
"That's Dodge."
'Yeah. She got a ship and came looking for any of us she could find. She found me stuck on a planet hurt and hiding. Aeryn was pretty far along. She was afraid that the pregnancy was lasting longer then an ordinary sebacean pregnancy. It was then that I decided I would not leave her or Jack. I haven't. I want to help as long as they both need me. It's more I could say for you."
John was staring off into the distance adsorbing it up. Chiana cleared her throat getting his attention. "After Jack was born we stayed hidden until Aeryn felt comfortable becoming a mom. She took to it remarkably well. A few monens after his birth we found transport and started hunting for you. We searched for three long cycles. Each time we would feel we were getting close only to find the trail was cold. I would have given up on you but not Aeryn. I asked her once why she persisted in finding you. It wasn't until a day or so ago that she finally answered my question. You want to know what it was?"
Shaking his head with a shrug he knew she would tell him anyway. "It was because the biggest mistake she had ever made in her life was leaving you and not telling you about Jack. She had to find you so that you and Jack could know each other. That's all she was expecting from you. All she wanted was for Jack to know his father. Now you tell me, Mr. Know-nothing, why in the frell haven't you paid attention to your very own son?"
John leaned back against the wall, not answering. Frell he didn't even know what to say.
"Ahhh! You frelling stupid human." Chiana screamed. She jumped to her feet. "Stay in there till you rot, you drenit. John remained seated as she stormed off.