Wheeeeee~!!!! My first shot at a fanfiction! I've been thinking A LOT on this idea (if you look at the margins in my notebooks, you can see hundreds of squiggly arrow thingies and illegible words crammed into lil nooks and crannies) and FINALLY I'm actually typing the thing up...XD

Disclaimer: I don't own naruto. (awwww) I don't own sasuke either. (shucks) the same goes for kakashi, sakura, and the RV that Team 7 will eventually use in later chapters.(no duh, they stole it from some poor old guy)

Warnings: Horrible grammar, run-on sentences, and lots of OOC-ness. Oh, and NO pairings (I'm sorry for any narusasu fans...really, I'd LOVE to make this into a shonen-ai but I suck at it. Please don't beat me up.X3) I think pg-13 for language and minor violence.

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

Road Trip Across America: Naruto Style!

Explanation: Ok. I got this idea from this website called "FluffyMag" where they have a series called "Big Buttocks". It's basically what you get when you stuff the Inuyasha cast into a house with a disembodied voice. (Kinda like the TV show, big brother)

The fic I'm writing is what happens when a sleep-deprived naruto fan combines _that_, a bunch of states, an RV, and Team 7.

The prologue sucks, I know, but it sets up the stage for the fun(?) stuff.

By: rice-pudding

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

Prologue: When things go wrong

"You're LATE!!!"

This was the greeting Kakashi, the leader of team 7, was met with at the group's meeting place. His silver hair swished to one side to reveal one of his eyes, which was now only a thin crescent, showing amusement at the 2 very annoyed genins glaring at him.

"I was fixing my neighbor's roof which collapsed because of that last blizzard."

The blonde boy clad in orange yelled, "It's JULY!!! We haven't had snow in 7 months! We haven't had a blizzard in YEARS!"

The tall, dark-haired boy standing next to the speaker furrowed his brows and said, "Must you be so loud? Half the village is probably awake now because of your yelling, dobe."

"Who the hell are you callin dobe?!"

"I'm calling you a dobe."

"Don't call me that!"

"Dobe."

"ARGH~!!! Say that one more time and I'll..."

"You'll do what? Last time you said that I kicked your sorry ass so well you couldn't move for a day."

"."

"Hmph. I thought so."

"Jerk"

"Moron"

"Dumb-ass"

"Dead-last"

"."

"Ha. I win"

"Ugh~!!!!!!"

Kakashi sweat-dropped and stood between the 2 boys to stop them from murdering each other. Sakura, the pink-haired girl, seemed worried but her inner self was whooping for a sparring match.

"That's enough. We have a C-rank mission to complete today and we'll never get it done if we have 2 corpses on our hands."

Naruto and Sasuke huffed and glared at each other before following Kakashi into the forest with Sakura.

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

"Kakashi-sensei~!!! We've been walkin for YEARS! We're practically out of the leaf country and you STILL haven't told us what the mission is~!!!!"

Sakura nodded in assent and Sasuke shot a glare towards Kakashi.

"Well, if I had told you earlier, you wouldn't have agreed to come with me."

Uh oh.

Kakashi continued, "I've volunteered our team to be the first to help an elderly researcher experiment concerning time and space theories he is renowned for."

Sasuke commented dryly, "So we're the guinea pigs."

"Precisely."

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

The foursome finally arrived at a small cabin that stood next to a brook at the edge of a clearing.

Kakashi walked up to the door and knocked as hard as he could.

"Oi! Watcha doin?! You're gonna bring the whole damn thing down!!!"

Despite Naruto's protests, the silver-haired jounin kept on banging. The funny thing was, the trio could hear the shuffling of feet inside but the door remained closed.

"Hey.hey.! What's wrong with the old geezer?! Is he deaf or something?!?!"

Kakashi chuckled and used a simple jutsu to unlock the door and walked right in.

"Geez! What was the point of knocking if you were gonna barge in anyhow?"

The genins followed Kakashi into the cabin to be greeted by a chaotic mess. The floor was littered with scrolls, and wooden mechanisms were haphazardly placed around the room. The latter were making odd clicking noises once in a while in addition to a constant barrage of rhythmic thumps. A wizened old man with a towel around his neck was pacing the length of the room, taking notes on the process of his experiments. He didn't even seen to notice that there were 4 strangers in his home(?).

"This is Enoki-sama. Practically deaf, near-sighted, and suffering from short term memory loss."

"eh?!?!"

This finally caught the old geez. I mean, researcher's attention. He looked up in surprise but upon seeing Kakashi broke into a happy (and loud) chatter.

"So you're finally here! I was starting to think I had the days mixed up when you didn't show up on times. Then again, I might have forgotten the time of the appointment. It would have been a real loss I tell you, a real loss, if it turned out to be another day. The potion that needs to be tested takes a full month to age and today is when it is at the peak of perfection! Now hurry along, no time to dilly dally~!"

The 3 confused genins followed Kakashi, who in turn followed Enoki-sama, into an adjacent room where there was a raised platform surrounded by lit candles.

Naruto piped up, "What are the candles for?"

The researcher looked up and asked, "Did you say something young man?"

Naruto stomped next to him and just about screamed into the other's ear, "WHAT ARE THE CANDLES FOR?!?!"

Enoki-sama smiled and replied, "The set looks creepier that way." (XD)

The 4 soon-to-be-guinea-pigs sighed and Naruto muttered, "I just know I am NOT going to like this." Kakashi smiled. Sorta.

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

"Now here's the potion. It's made out of 70 different species of herbs so don't spill even a single drop! Along with several hand seals, I will perform a ninjutsu that should take you 5 min. forward in time. To you, it should feel like nothing happened. To me, you should disappear and then appear again 5 mins. later. Got that? When you're ready."

*Poof*

Team 7 was no more. (fx: evil laugh)

'Now for the 5 min. wait."

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

.5 min. later.

"And tada~!!! 4 shinobi's appear forth in time~!!!"

(fx. Cricket chirps)

The researcher paced the room wondering what happened to his guinea pigs. Looking back to his notes, he scanned for mistakes.

'No.there's nothing amiss! It should have worked fine.but wait.damn these stupid eyes. Can't even read a character that big. Where're my glasses? Oh here they are. Now let's see.'

'...'

'oops.'

'That wasn't supposed to be a fox seal but instead a rat seal. Damn. I should alert the hokage if this immediately.'

He ran out the cabin door and dashed across the clearing towards the village. Just as he was about to enter the forest, he stopped.

'Why am I out here again?'

TBC

|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

author's note: Yes I know, the whole thing's very weird and the ending really is crappy but hey! This is my first shot at writing anything outside of my English class so go easy on me.XP