Prologue - The Drak Lord Strikes
A hidden past. A dark secret. That is what my life is. No one knows anything about me. No one would understand what I have been through. My parents risked everything they had, everything they were, despite the warning of all the members of the Order of the White Rose, to report the Dark Lord's doings. We all did what we had to to keep alive, while still helping out the light. But only I'm still alive. Only I still live. The aurors didn't get to my home in time to save my parents. They didn't bother, they hoped the alert would be a chance to take them to Azkaban, after all, not everyone knew about their involvement in the Order. But when the aurors did finally get there, they met up with the surprise of their lives.
I still look back every once in a while and see my parents' faces when they saw the Dark Mark above the doorway. I can vividly recall both of them standing up to him, listening to what he was accusing them of, denying having cooperated with the light. But their protests were weak, and I knew he could see through them. I could see through them. He told them that if they swore their fealty to him and swore to not double-cross him again, he would let them off easily. After all, they were pretty high up in the spectrum of his followers. But they denied him, and they faced the consequences. Sometimes, I can still hear their tortured screams of pain as he used the crucio curse on them. I can see their faces, even though I shut my eyes. I'm just lucky he didn't see me at the time, for I would be dead too.
Lord Voldemort. What kind of a lord is he? He is nothing. He is perverse and weak, and he has a cruel sense of humour. He tortured my parents senseless, all the while laughing at their pained expressions. And then, in one swift movement, in one breath, he killed them. They died without a word. I never got to say goodbye to them, I never had a chance to look at their smiling faces one last time before they left this world forever. Not that they would have had much to say, had we been allowed a parting word, but nonetheless, it's something.
I can remember clearly how, as soon as the Dark Lord finished off my parents, he looked around, as if trying to find something. And sure enough he found it. That thing he was looking for happened to be me. Sometimes I see those crimson slits he had for eyes in my dreams. They haunt me and terrorize me. The way the light glinted off those slits that night gave him a maniacal look, one that will follow me forever.
The Dark Lord approached me slowly and calmly, trapping me in the corner I had hidden myself. He stooped over me and shook his head in false disappointment.
"What would your parents say if they saw you like this?" he asked me softly.
I quivered under his icy cold breath. He frightened me, and indeed I had good reason to be frightened by this... this thing.
"They probably wouldn't be too happy by your lack of courage," he concluded for me. "Then again, they died the same way. Cowering in fear. Those fools!"
"They are braver than you will ever be. They didn't bend to your will, and they died for what they believed was right. That does not make them fools, on the contrary- "
"Silence!" he yelled at me.
I didn't know at the time what had propelled me to defend my parents in the face of death, and even now I still wonder. Whatever it was though, he silenced it real quick.
He talked to me again, but I cannot remember what he said. All I can remember is a searing pain soaring through my limbs. I twisted and turned, I writhed, trying to make it stop, but it would not go away. I heard myself, my voice, projected, screaming. I was screaming out in pain for him to have mercy, I was screaming out for my parents.
And then, it stopped. As suddenly as it had come, it left. I opened my eyes and saw at least a dozen witches and wizards lined up, standing in front of me. Their wands were out and they were facing the Dark Lord. Many of them were attempting to conceal their shock, their amazement as they stared at my parents' body, at the Dark Lord as he hovered above them before disappearing with a loud bang.
I must have passed out then, because I remember nothing else until I opened my eyes again and found myself in a white room, with white bed sheets, and blinding white lights. There was too much white. And sitting next to my bed, was a mediwizard, in white robes.
He told me to sit up slowly and examined me, while I sat and stupidly tried to recall what I was doing there. But when I did recall, I wish I hadn't. I almost cried right there and then, but I sucked it up and listened to the doctor who was now talking to me.
"What is your name please?"
"Gwendolyn Brookes."
"Age?"
"I'll be fifteen in October."
"Can you remember anything that happened last night?"
Images began popping into my head, my parents, their screams, the Dark Lord, his crimson eyes. I closed my eyes and sighed deeply, trying to lower my breathing rate, which had suddenly sped up. Then I looked at the doctor, coldly, unemotionally. He nodded his head and left. It was only then that I let the tears spill out of my eyes. It was only then that I allowed myself to be weak.
It has been four months since Voldemort attacked my parents, attacked me. Four months and I still keep reliving that night. Four months, and I am still afraid that he will come for me. Four months and I still can't get over that night.
And to make things worse, now I must go back to school. But not Beauxbatons. No, I could never go back there. I would never be able to live up the stares and the rumors, and the small talk. No, I could never go back to Beauxbatons. So my closest choice was Hogwarts. It's a despicable British school, but I must go. And the aurors say that it's the safest place on earth right now, especially since Albus Dumbledore is headmaster.
I have heard of this Headmaster Dumbledore. Fleur Delacoeur was talking about what an old loony he was, after she came back a year ago from the Triwizard Tourmanent. Still, if they say that it is the safest place for now, I guess I must go. I can't very well stay out here and live on my own. I have the money my parents left me, but I don't know what to do with myself, and I can't use magic. I might as well finish school and then leave the country. At least going to school, I will not have to be staying with random foreign auror families as I have been having to do.
Life is crap.
A hidden past. A dark secret. That is what my life is. No one knows anything about me. No one would understand what I have been through. My parents risked everything they had, everything they were, despite the warning of all the members of the Order of the White Rose, to report the Dark Lord's doings. We all did what we had to to keep alive, while still helping out the light. But only I'm still alive. Only I still live. The aurors didn't get to my home in time to save my parents. They didn't bother, they hoped the alert would be a chance to take them to Azkaban, after all, not everyone knew about their involvement in the Order. But when the aurors did finally get there, they met up with the surprise of their lives.
I still look back every once in a while and see my parents' faces when they saw the Dark Mark above the doorway. I can vividly recall both of them standing up to him, listening to what he was accusing them of, denying having cooperated with the light. But their protests were weak, and I knew he could see through them. I could see through them. He told them that if they swore their fealty to him and swore to not double-cross him again, he would let them off easily. After all, they were pretty high up in the spectrum of his followers. But they denied him, and they faced the consequences. Sometimes, I can still hear their tortured screams of pain as he used the crucio curse on them. I can see their faces, even though I shut my eyes. I'm just lucky he didn't see me at the time, for I would be dead too.
Lord Voldemort. What kind of a lord is he? He is nothing. He is perverse and weak, and he has a cruel sense of humour. He tortured my parents senseless, all the while laughing at their pained expressions. And then, in one swift movement, in one breath, he killed them. They died without a word. I never got to say goodbye to them, I never had a chance to look at their smiling faces one last time before they left this world forever. Not that they would have had much to say, had we been allowed a parting word, but nonetheless, it's something.
I can remember clearly how, as soon as the Dark Lord finished off my parents, he looked around, as if trying to find something. And sure enough he found it. That thing he was looking for happened to be me. Sometimes I see those crimson slits he had for eyes in my dreams. They haunt me and terrorize me. The way the light glinted off those slits that night gave him a maniacal look, one that will follow me forever.
The Dark Lord approached me slowly and calmly, trapping me in the corner I had hidden myself. He stooped over me and shook his head in false disappointment.
"What would your parents say if they saw you like this?" he asked me softly.
I quivered under his icy cold breath. He frightened me, and indeed I had good reason to be frightened by this... this thing.
"They probably wouldn't be too happy by your lack of courage," he concluded for me. "Then again, they died the same way. Cowering in fear. Those fools!"
"They are braver than you will ever be. They didn't bend to your will, and they died for what they believed was right. That does not make them fools, on the contrary- "
"Silence!" he yelled at me.
I didn't know at the time what had propelled me to defend my parents in the face of death, and even now I still wonder. Whatever it was though, he silenced it real quick.
He talked to me again, but I cannot remember what he said. All I can remember is a searing pain soaring through my limbs. I twisted and turned, I writhed, trying to make it stop, but it would not go away. I heard myself, my voice, projected, screaming. I was screaming out in pain for him to have mercy, I was screaming out for my parents.
And then, it stopped. As suddenly as it had come, it left. I opened my eyes and saw at least a dozen witches and wizards lined up, standing in front of me. Their wands were out and they were facing the Dark Lord. Many of them were attempting to conceal their shock, their amazement as they stared at my parents' body, at the Dark Lord as he hovered above them before disappearing with a loud bang.
I must have passed out then, because I remember nothing else until I opened my eyes again and found myself in a white room, with white bed sheets, and blinding white lights. There was too much white. And sitting next to my bed, was a mediwizard, in white robes.
He told me to sit up slowly and examined me, while I sat and stupidly tried to recall what I was doing there. But when I did recall, I wish I hadn't. I almost cried right there and then, but I sucked it up and listened to the doctor who was now talking to me.
"What is your name please?"
"Gwendolyn Brookes."
"Age?"
"I'll be fifteen in October."
"Can you remember anything that happened last night?"
Images began popping into my head, my parents, their screams, the Dark Lord, his crimson eyes. I closed my eyes and sighed deeply, trying to lower my breathing rate, which had suddenly sped up. Then I looked at the doctor, coldly, unemotionally. He nodded his head and left. It was only then that I let the tears spill out of my eyes. It was only then that I allowed myself to be weak.
It has been four months since Voldemort attacked my parents, attacked me. Four months and I still keep reliving that night. Four months, and I am still afraid that he will come for me. Four months and I still can't get over that night.
And to make things worse, now I must go back to school. But not Beauxbatons. No, I could never go back there. I would never be able to live up the stares and the rumors, and the small talk. No, I could never go back to Beauxbatons. So my closest choice was Hogwarts. It's a despicable British school, but I must go. And the aurors say that it's the safest place on earth right now, especially since Albus Dumbledore is headmaster.
I have heard of this Headmaster Dumbledore. Fleur Delacoeur was talking about what an old loony he was, after she came back a year ago from the Triwizard Tourmanent. Still, if they say that it is the safest place for now, I guess I must go. I can't very well stay out here and live on my own. I have the money my parents left me, but I don't know what to do with myself, and I can't use magic. I might as well finish school and then leave the country. At least going to school, I will not have to be staying with random foreign auror families as I have been having to do.
Life is crap.