Even Better Than the Real Thing
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Please note, that I do not own the characters Draco Malfoy or Ginny Weasley, or any other magical lingo.
This is a Draco/Ginny romance story.
---------------------------------------------------
HUGE AUTHOR'S NOTES:
(Sorry!! Skip down to the chapter heading if you don't care!)
Regarding the chapter titles:
I never realized it would be such an issue/concern. Once again, each title will be the title of a song, one which I was listening to while writing the chapter. It may have inspired me, either through lyrics or tone. It's important to help you understand the tone. When I say certain things, they can be imagined a multitude of different ways, and that's fine, but if you want the full impact, the song helps a little.
Just a thing that I'm doing. Mostly to make myself happy. And to spread the joy of music. Should you download any of these songs, and maybe listen to them as your read, you'll see where I'm going with that. Anyway, the lyrics of the songs (most of them) match up really well with the emotions of the characters or the tone of the scene. Yes? Get it? Don't worry, it'll come up again, and I'll mention it, again. :-)
Regarding the originality of content:
Also, I know that a lot of this is unoriginal material. The whole diary/sketchbook deal, the whole Malfoy turning Death Eater bit (which I think is pretty true to the story). I know that my characterization of Ginny is timid and sorta apathetic, but that's how I saw Ginny. Draco's pretty accurate, right? Sorta? He'll change, time can do that to a person…
Regarding concerns over romance:
Also, they will be falling in love. It'll happen I promise! I know it's taking time. I don't like it when people rush into it and have them kissing within the first few chapters. It's not about the kissing. This is about the falling in love, them learning what it means to love, having to make sacrifices, etc. I know most people agree with me on this point. Since this is a story about their romance, it'll progress slowly, but surely. There will be love. You'll be able to feel it.
Also my general thanks to everyone who has reviewed and to everyone who's enjoying this. I really really appreciate your feedback. It makes me feel special!! Also, the number of reviews for this story has surpassed my 10 chapter fic about Severus, which I've poured more of my heart into! I cannot believe it! Anyway, I love Draco and Ginny, and I really wanted to make a story that everyone can get attached to…
Once again, sorry about the incredibly long Author's Notes!!!
---------------------------------------------------
Don't forget: Review some more!
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Chapter 5: Don't Tell Me
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
It had been three days since she saw Draco last. She was sitting in the library again, at the same table she always used. She felt restless. Most students were outside, enjoying the chilly winter weather. Snowballs, snowmen, forts and Hogsmeade. And she certainly wasn't in the mood.
So Ginny sat there, staring at nothing, books open and spread out over the round oak table.
For the past couple of days, she got teased by most of the Slytherins for her silly diary entries. It didn't matter. She really didn't notice after a while. Ron admitted that he was impressed with her indifference to the whole situation. She had only shrugged her shoulders in response. He patted her on the shoulder and told her everything would be alright. She had just shrugged again.
Ginny hadn't been thinking about her diary. She didn't think about Pansy and her friends spreading their pointless rumors. She wasn't even concerned with Christmas or presents or holiday assignments. More than anything, her mind went to Draco Malfoy. She was constantly wondering where he might be at that moment, what he might be doing. Is he still at Hogwarts? If so, why haven't I seen him the past few days?
She reasoned that it was quite possible he was avoiding her. Maybe he was upset with her for looking in his private sketchbook and for finding out his darkest secrets. Ginny started to grin, imagining Draco following her sneakily around corners, waiting for the perfect moment to attack.
"What's so funny, Weasley?"
Ginny jumped. She turned to the leering voice about ten feet to her right, her smile gone. There stood Draco Malfoy. He was tall. She guessed he was about as tall as Ron. And he was lean, probably from all that Quidditch practice. After all, he had to practice really hard if he wanted to beat our Harry, she thought.
She eyed his expensive clothes, feeling very self-conscious and reminded that she was very impoverished. He wore a white button-up shirt layered with a dark green wool sweater. His hands were tucked into the pockets of his gray dress slacks. Even his shoes were expensive, all black and shiny. His tan canvas bag was slung over one shoulder, looking casual. His white-blond hair was slicked back, caressing the base of his neck. And of course, his trademark smirk. Anyone would look at him and say nothing unusual has happened to him lately.
"I was thinking about you, Draco." She replied honestly. She looked up into his eyes. He was surprised, she could tell. He sneered at her, pretending she was being sarcastic with him. He walked around to the other side of the table. He nudged a couple books aside, being purposely gentle, and put down his bag.
"Reading?" He eyed all of the open books.
"Not really," Ginny moved to close a few and stack them aside. She hooked some hair behind her ear and brought her eyes up to his face. Keeping her voice steady, she asked, "Draco…how are you?"
He snorted. The smirk plastered on his attractive face, he rose his eyes to hers, looking at her from under his lashes. Ginny's breath caught in her throat. Maybe she was prying too much.
"What do you care, Weasley?"
Oddly, Ginny felt hurt by that statement. Sure, she was feeling apathetic lately, but not about this. Not about him. She was truly concerned.
"Draco, my name is Ginny. Not Weasley."
He snorted again, though the smirk slowly faded.
"Alright, Ginny, it's not like you care." He put so much emphasis on her name that the rest of his sentence didn't even matter. She sighed. Here's the Draco she knew. It can't be too bad.
She stared down at the book open in front of her, pretending to read. It felt a little awkward sitting at the same table as Draco. It was almost like there was a sense of familiarity with each other. Like a new understanding of each other.
Her face flushed as she felt Draco stare at her. He cleared this throat. He reached out and turned her book around. It had been upside-down.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
The day was cold yet mostly sunny. Snow fell throughout the night, creating a wonderland for all the students to wake up to.
Draco was in no mood to be cold. He was in no mood for anything, really. He had wanted his escape. And now here he was. Free, yet feeling completely alone. He felt directionless.
He had spoken long with Professor Snape and Headmaster Dumbledore. They spoke for hours that day in the office. He felt numb from the whole experience. He still couldn't believe that he took the first step to the Light. He had always thought he'd just keep getting swept along by his father.
His father. He wasn't sure what he'd say to him. He would have to send an owl within 3 days. Three days until Christmas. He'd have to consult Professor Snape this evening.
Draco had doubted Snape's loyalty to the Dark Lord for a long time, but he never mentioned it. He loved and respected his Head of House like a second father. He was always available for Draco, and seemed to understand where Draco was coming from.
Draco still felt sick every time he thought of this entire ordeal. And being out in the cold would not help matters. He wouldn't want to be outside in that blasted snow even if he weren't burdened with such worries. He wanted to be warm.
He instinctively headed down to the library after he had his lunch in Professor Snape's chambers. He had been eating all of his meals there. Mostly because he didn't have the nerve to step into the Great Hall. He knew that nobody suspected anything. To everyone else, he'd still be the same Draco.
To everyone but the little girl. Weasley. Ginny, he corrected himself. He sneered when he thought of her. He wasn't sure why, but he's been incredibly irritable the past few days. He couldn't keep the scowl off his face.
When he reached the library doors, he pushed them open, feeling a blast of warmth and an air of solitude. He closed his eyes, luxuriating in the sensation. He stepped inside, shoving his hands in his pockets, sauntering towards his favorite table tucked behind several rows of books.
His eyes caught on a flash of red. There she was, he smirked. The little Weasley was sitting here in the library. He approached her silently, not sure what he'd say or do. He walked around to her side, and watched her.
Her eyes were unfocused, clearing not reading the books lying in front of her. The expression on her small, delicate face made his heart throb. She was sad. She looked upset and confused. The smirk faded slightly.
He trailed his eyes down her body, starting with her hair. It was red. He'd despised that red hair for years. Damn Weasley red. The locks were shiny and curled slightly, cascading over her shoulders. She wore a gray t-shirt, probably a hand-me-down from one of her million brothers. Over that, she wore a faded, lavender hand-knit sweater with a yellow V on the front. He wondered what the V meant, middle name maybe? She was wearing a pair of jeans, most likely used, that looked slightly too big around her waist and legs, and slightly too short. Her sneakers were terribly scuffed, most likely another treasure gifted her from one of her brothers.
No cosmetics or jewelry. Nothing fancy, nothing special. Personally, he thought she looked silly. She could have done far better. He smirked again, imagining taking her to the absurdly fancy stores his mother shopped at. The fuss they would make over this little doll. He nearly chuckled.
Draco saw her lips curl into a small grin, her eyes starting to twinkle. Some amusing thought, perhaps?
"What's so funny, Weasley?"
She seemed to snap out of her trance. She turned and stared at him for a while. She appeared to be sizing him up. Her answer shocked him. She was thinking about him? His scowl deepened.
Draco rounded the table and sat down. He had planned on being alone for the day, but somehow he felt better sitting near her. She even had the nerve to ask him how he was. How was he? Even he didn't really know. And besides, why did she care? She gave up after a while and pretended to go back to her reading.
Draco, my name is Ginny. Not Weasley.
She was cute. He watched a few more minutes, one hand resting on the book, the other wrapped around the back of her neck, holding back her hair. Her eyes flew across the page, her dark lashes fluttering when she blinked. He almost sighed, but he shook his head, reminding himself where he was.
He reached across the table and turned her book around for her. Unless she was an expert at reading upside down… He grinned. He genuinely grinned. He felt his heart throb again.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Ginny giggled. She looked up to see Draco grinning. He was grinning! Not cruel, not mocking. Genuine. She giggled, feeling happy for the first time in days. The soft sound echoed around the library.
"I'm glad you found that amusing, Miss Weasley, now that's five points from Gryffindor for disturbing all of the other students," said Draco, impersonating Madam Pince exactly. He gestured around the room, which was completely empty. Ginny smiled at him. She watched him sit back in his chair, running a hand over his sleek hair. She tilted her head a little to the side, imagining running her own fingers through his hair.
"Look, Weasley, I trust you not to…well," he cleared his throat. "Not to mention my situation to anyone…"
Ginny's eyebrows flew up. So much for understanding.
"Draco…I'd never talk about that…" She looked at him, sincerely. "I promise. You can use Obliviate on me if you'd like."
He shook his head. He looked down and folded his hands behind his head. She observed him quietly. He stretched his legs out under the table, his feet lightly touching hers. She crossed her ankles and pulled them under her chair. Draco seemed lost in thought. He closed his eyes and stayed perfectly still.
Ginny traced the pattern of wood on the table with her fingers. She remembered the blank calm look Draco had on his face that day in the Headmaster's office. She felt a slight pain in her chest. She knew what it was. It was pride. She was proud of Draco. He did the right thing. On his own. That must have been very difficult. Ginny could only imagine.
"What would you like for Christmas, Ginny?"
The question shocked her. She looked up to Draco. He was rubbing his face with his hands. She noticed the slight stubble covering his chin and cheeks. He arched an eyebrow at her, dragging his fingers along his jaw, lazily, nonchalant.
"Um…I'm not sure. Haven't given it any thought, really. Why do you ask?" She bit her bottom lip, waiting for his response. Was he…was he offering to get her a present?
"No reason." He cleared his throat. "Well, I was wondering because I happen to know Santa Claus…" He paused while Ginny giggled. "And since you've been a nice little girl, I can put in a good word for you." He tapped his fingers on the table, pretending to be serious. Oh, he was too much, Ginny thought.
"Draco?" Her gentle tone made him stop drumming his fingers. He looked up at her, his face blank and serious.
"Yes?"
"I…well…I know this will sound silly, and feel free to stop me if I'm making a complete fool of myself…but what I'd really like for Christmas is a …a friend." She licked her lips, holding her breath.
Draco studied her a moment. His pale gray eyes searched her brown ones. He seemed to be contemplating what she said. Ginny swallowed. Oddly, Draco was one person she could, not only relate to, but also respect.
He opened his mouth, starting to say something, but stopped and closed it again. He did this several times, looking rather confused as to how to respond.
Ginny felt a blush creep into her cheeks. She could have smacked herself. Why was she so silly? Like Draco Malfoy doesn't have enough problems, she wants to be his friend? She groaned inwardly. Finally, Draco seemed to decide on what to say.
"Well, I don't think they have those at Gladrags, but I'll see what I can do for you, Ginny." He smirked at her, surprising her by using her first name. Ginny couldn't resist a smile back.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
"No, I guess it's more like a dive than a dip, really." Weasley was explaining one of her favorite Quidditch moves. She grew up with 6 boys, and if she hadn't learned to play, they all would have been seriously offended. From what Draco could tell, she was rather good.
Draco nodded, as she continued talking. She talked a lot, he realized. But he didn't mind. She kept his mind distracted. He hugged himself tight. Being a moron, he had suggested they go for a walk outside. Ginny just smiled and agreed.
They each had gone back to their respective dormitories to return their things and to dress in their warmest clothes. When they met out in front of the Entrance Hall doors, they made quite the odd pair.
Ginny was dressed in mismatching muggle style clothes. She wore a blue sweater over her lavender one, a light jacket, and a black overcoat. She had wrapped her neck with her faded yellow and red Gryffindor scarf, and stuffed her hands into an old pair of yellow gloves. She wore a pair of red rubber boots, and topped off her outfit with a muggle cap that read "NYC" across the front.
He layered a thick enchanted wool overcoat, a shadowy black. He wore his Slytherin green and silver scarf, a pair of costly black leather gloves, and a pair of black boots. He even wore his gray cloak over his coat, just in case. He prided himself on looking, literally, like a million galleons.
Quite the pair. Draco nearly laughed. But he reminded himself that wouldn't be polite. So instead he grinned at her. She was cute. He shook himself, scolding himself for using words like cute. She was…endearing. That was more satisfactory.
They walked along a path that led around the grounds, winding toward the Quidditch Pitch. Their pace was leisurely, and their conversation was carefree. This is just what Draco needed. It was in fact a beautiful day, despite the intense cold.
By the time they reached the Pitch, his nose and ears felt numb with cold. He looked down at Ginny, smiling at her pink face. She was looking around the Pitch, still talking.
"But there was this one time, when Percy thought that Fred and George were going to run the Porskoff Ploy, but instead they maneuvered around…"
Draco toned out, not entirely caring what she was saying, just as long as she kept saying something. It was rather comforting. He liked the feeling of being in someone's company and not getting annoyed or angry. He felt neither. He felt at ease.
Draco climbed the stairs to the empty stands, Ginny following right behind him. He sat down, deliberately in the Slytherin cheering section. Ginny didn't seem to notice the enormous green and silver banners above and behind her.
"So, if you ever need to decide between the Howley Maneuver and the Porskoff Ploy—" He interrupted her.
"Weasley—" She interrupted him.
"Ginny."
"Sorry." Damn it, why can't he remember that. "Ginny, shut up a moment, will you?" That came out harsher than he intended. She rolled her eyes and looked away, folding her arms across her chest.
Draco sat a moment, enjoying the silence. His body was nearly numb with cold. The silence was deafening. After a few moments, the only sounds he could hear were his own heartbeat and Ginny's breaths.
The field was covered in fresh white snow. There was a sharp stinging wind. Neither of them seemed to mind it much. They each sat silent, with pink faces and slightly shaking bodies.
"So, what does the V stand for?"
For a moment she looked at him, confused. She didn't follow what he was asking. He pointed to her chest, where the V was buried beneath layers of gaudy, cheap fabrics.
Misunderstanding his meaning, she looked down at herself, starting to get a little angry. She looked back up him and hit him on the shoulder.
"You sweater, Ginny, your sweater!"
He laughed at the bright blush in her cheeks. She finally understood. She turned her head, looking at the far end of the Pitch. He figured she wasn't going to answer him. They sat another few minutes in the cold. He started to wonder what they were doing out here anyway.
"Virginia."
"Excuse me?"
"The V…it stands for Virginia," she sighed. She rubbed her gloved hands together. "That's my name."
"Ginny? For Virginia? That's just…" He wanted to say tacky, but that would probably make her angry. Instead he said, "That's quite apropos."
"And what, Draco, do you mean by that?"
"Nothing, nothing! I just…well, I think that Virginia is more beautiful." He surprised himself by telling the truth. He did think it was more beautiful name. Ginny sounded so…young and clumsy. Virginia sounded elegant and mature. He made up his mind to never again call her Ginny, or Weasley for that matter. Only Virginia. Whether she liked it or not.
"My mum made it for me, Christmas present from last year. She knits a sweater for each of us, and for Harry, too." Draco scowled at the mention of Harry. Harry bloody Potter. The boy who lived. The boy who bugged the hell out of Draco, that's who he really was. He didn't dwell on these thoughts long, as he realized Ginny was asking him a question.
"Draco?"
"Sorry, what did you say?"
"I asked you what you'd like for Christmas."
What he'd like? He looked out over Pitch once again. He stared off for a long time, wondering what he wanted. He wanted to live to see his 17th birthday. And all the birthdays following that. He wanted to live a free life, not having to worry about his father, or the Dark Lord. He really wanted a lavish mansion on a private island somewhere.
He started to smile, imagining the constant warm sunshine and hot sand. The clear water. The skies, the sunsets, the stars. He sat back, completely lost in thought.
"Draco?"
He turned to Ginny. He couldn't ask her for a private island. Where the hell would she get one of those? He couldn't very well ask her to protect his life either. And she was quite clever, coming up with such a simple, honest answer when he asked her the same question.
"Virginia, there are many things I'd like to receive for Christmas. But I don't think any of them are really possible."
"Nothing simple? Like a new broomstick repair kit? Or maybe a set of quills?" She paused, thinking. "A box of Honeyduke's finest chocolates?"
Draco smiled at her naivety. Quills. He wished that those were the things he longed for. Instead of longing for a life.
Draco cleared his throat and stood up.
"You must be freezing in that joke of a coat. We should head back to the castle. That'll give you enough time to warm up before dinner." He started bounding down the stairs, not noticing that Virginia wasn't following him.
He was nearly back to the path when he turned and looked over his shoulder. He easily spotted her still off in the stands. She was standing there, staring at him. He turned back to the path and waited. It was several moments before she caught up.
"Sorry. Was just thinking," she explained, huffing to catch her breath. "So, do you think you'll join us for dinner in the Great Hall tonight?"
He shook his head, suddenly not trusting to use his voice. He felt a bit shaky.
They plodded along, side by side, through the thin layer of snow on the path. They retraced their footsteps back toward the castle.
Draco gazed off into the Forbidden Forest. His head was starting to hurt. His eyes were starting to burn, threatening to tear. His heart was heavy. He felt so burdened.
He felt a small hand slip into his own. He turned and looked down to see the Weasley—Virginia, he corrected himself—looking back coyly. Surprised, he flashed her an awkward smile and tightened his hand around hers. He felt the tears threaten to choke him. He coughed into his other gloved hand and cleared his throat.
He'd be damned if he let her see him cry. Though, oddly, he felt like she'd be the only person to really understand why.
So he walked. They walked, hand in hand. All the way back to the castle, not needing to utter a single word.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
U2 – Even Better Than the Real Thing
The Strokes – Hard to Explain
Weezer – Island in the Sun
Cake – Hem of your Garment
Moby – We Are All Made of Stars
Madonna – Don't Tell Me
*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Sorry the chapter was a bit heavy on the Draco-side. But I'm sure most of you won't really mind ;-). Please excuse any errors/typos, as I was extremely sleepy when I posted this (around 3:30 in the morning!). I'll look it over later today and repost if there are any corrections. Hope you liked it!
Draco's overcoat would be something like this, probably a little younger looking, but about this formal and expensive-looking:
http://www.customsuits.co.uk/styles/Overcoat4.jpg
Don't forget to review!