Even Better Than the Real Thing

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

Please note, that I do not own the characters Draco Malfoy or Ginny Weasley, or any other magical lingo.

This is a Draco/Ginny romance story.

Updated 11/11/02:

http://www.lorddave.com/evenbetter

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

Chapter 13:  Heroes

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

            Virginia.  Was her hair always this red?  He tried memorizing every detail of her flushed face.  Her maroon dress flapped in the cold wind, her tatty coat doing little to protect her.  He stood a moment, completely lost in her.  When his eyes met hers, he saw she was ready for a good cry.  He stood silent, not wanting to move, not wanting to ever move.  He wanted time to stand still, and leave him here.  With Virginia.

            Virginia.  The same girl he had teased for years.  Bloody hell, he didn't even know her name until a few days ago.  He had teased the "little weasel" for years.  And her family.  Her impoverished family.  He'd made fun of her meddling father.  Called her mother plump.  Mocked her brothers – damn Weasleys – and her crush, Potter.  Bugger.  This girl.  This girl that he knew nothing about.  In the past, all he had seen was the red hair.

            The same red hair was holding him captive at this moment.  She hooked a few strands of unruly hair behind her ear.  It was hopeless, as the wind swept it back across her face.  He admired how the silky tresses flew with the wind.

            How could it be love?  He didn't even know her.  He knew nothing.  He should stamp out the feeling before it does develop into love, though.

            "What are you doing here?"

            Draco turned back toward the tracks, looking for the train.  He could see it, far in the distance.  Another 7 or 8 minutes away.  He pretended to be indifferent about her presence.  No matter how he felt, he has to leave her alone.  Even Severus agreed.  Now was not the time to get involved with anyone, in any sort of relationship.

            "Draco Malfoy, you owe me a friend."

            He spun around at her, his eyes wide in surprise and confusion.  She stood there, her hands on her hips, glaring up at him.

            "Excuse me?"

            "You heard me!  I want a friend!"

            "Virginia – "

            "No, you listen to me, what makes you think you can't be my friend?  Draco, Death-Eater or not, I want you as my friend."

            He stood, stunned.  This little girl.  Dear Merlin, she made him want to laugh and cry all at once.  She wanted him to be her friend.  What could he say to possibly explain to her?  A friendship with a Death-Eater was practically a death wish.  A friendship with a Malfoy was practically a traitorous act.

            "Virginia – "

            "Ron always says I need to start standing up for myself.  I agree.  So I'm starting here and now.  With you, Draco!"

He squinted at her, not sure if he heard her right.  Here and now.  Of all times.  Draco tried hard to keep any sort of expression off of his face.  So she wanted to stand up for herself.  Good for her.  But it just had to be here and now.

"Virginia, I – "

"And frankly, Draco, I think you need me in your life.  As much as you'd like to deny it and as much as you hate – "

He raised his hand, silencing her.  Something inside him shattered.  She thinks that he hates her, he thought.  He clenched his teeth, feeling his jaw tense.  He swallowed.  He gathered his courage and stepped closer, leaning down, inching his face closer to hers. 

Her open mouth snapped shut, her eyebrows raised questioningly.  He rested his hands lightly on her shoulders, resisting the urge to embrace her completely.  He pressed his forehead against hers, closing his eyes, hearing the train coming closer.  It was coming to take him away from her. 

Forever. 

He opened his eyes slowly, wanting to remember this moment for the rest of his life.  He looked at her, studied every inch of her face up close.  He saw her tears trickle down her face.  He felt her warm breath on his face.

"Virginia…"

Not caring about anything in the entire world, Draco closed the distance, kissing her lightly on the lips.

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

When Draco turned to face her, instead of feeling sympathetic or compassionate, she felt livid.  She got angry, something she rarely did. 

Ginny knew she was most likely the most patient person on the planet.  She had six older brothers.  That meant waiting her turn to use the bathroom.  Being the last person to be served at the dinner table.  Getting new things only when there was any money left over.  And, of course, enduring every prank imaginable.

And for some reason, Ginny's found herself angry at Draco.  Not for the years of teasing, or for him leaving to become a Death Eater.  It was because he owed her a friend.  Well, she knew he didn't make any promises, but that's how Ginny felt, nonetheless.  So here she was, on the station platform, standing a few feet from him, her hands on her hips.

This was probably the last time I'll ever be alone with Draco, she thought.  She swallowed.  And she was arguing with him.  Well, she was yelling at him, not letting him get a word in edgewise.  She felt her anger pass a bit.  Now she was feeling exasperated and confused.  But most of all, helpless.

"And frankly, Draco, I think you need me in your life.  As much as you'd like to deny it and as much as you hate – "

She was going to say as much as you hate me, but he raised his hand.  At first she thought he was waving her off, brushing her aside.  But he startled her by stepping closer, leaning closer.  Her heart was pounding painfully in her chest.  She wanted to wrap her arms around him and forget the world.  She heard the train in the distance, coming closer.  It was coming to take him away from her.

It was coming to take him away from her forever.  She couldn't help but let the tears flow down her cheeks.  And when he whispered her name, her breath caught in her throat.  The quiet, seductive tone –

He kissed her.

It was light.  Gentle.  Tender.  Brief, but perfect.  And when he pulled away, he wound his arms tightly around her, holding her to his chest.  She buried herself in his arms, squirming to get closer.

The train pulled into the station, air and smoke blasting out on the platform.  It tousled her hair, and whipped at her coat, but she ignored it. 

He moved his hands to her shoulders, pushing her away gently.  He stepped away from her, not taking his gray eyes off of her.  He stood there, looking more like a small boy than a grown young man.  He bent to pick up his suitcase.  He licked his lips and prepared to turn toward the train.

"Will I see you when you're back?"

Her voice was almost drowned out by the sounds of the train.  She tried pushing some hair back out of her face, hooking it behind her ear.  She watched drop his eyes to the ground, as he considered her question.  And looking back up at her, his face broke into the saddest expression she'd ever seen on him.

"No."

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

             The rest of the day was hard to pass for Draco.  The instant he had kissed Virginia, he knew he'd sealed his fate.  He loved her.  He really did.  And all it took to prove it to him was that one kiss.  Though it made things a lot harder on him, it was worth it.

            He was recalling moments from the past few days.  When he spotted her in the Great Hall with her hair in her mouth.  When he found her alone in the Owlery.  When he caught her reading upside down in the library.  When he took her to his sanctuary. 

            He stretched out across the seats in the small train compartment.  His hands behind his head, he lay there for most of the train ride.  He stared at the ceiling, replaying that kiss in his mind over and over.  He wondered what Virginia had thought of it.  He wondered if she loved him…

            One moment, I'm pushing her away, and the next I'm kissing her.  I'm really sending mixed messages to that girl…

            He chuckled, wondering if she was as confused by his actions as he was.  He thought back to the kiss.

            Then, unwanted images of him harassing her came to mind.  Like when he threw his book at her.  When he laughed as she tripped and fell.  When he scowled at her, shoving her aside, just for being a Weasley.  He'd been mean to her just out of spite.  Because of her stupid family.  Her even stupider git of a brother.  And because of her apparent crush on Harry bloody Potter.

            The mere thought of her infatuated with Potter made his heart clench up.  He knew he was jealous.  But it made him feel sick thinking about her in love with Potter.  He hoped that Potter would never realize what a woman she really was.

            He closed his eyes.  They were starting to burn again.  The surefire sign of lack of sleep.  Draco pushed all thoughts of Potter from his mind.  He tried to focus his tired mind on that kiss.  It wasn't his first.  And certainly not his last.  But quite possibly his most precious.

            Sleep took him slowly, catching him with a faint sad smile on his lips.

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

            The rest of the day was hard to pass for Ginny.  She was still stunned.  He'd kissed her.  She was about to say something along the lines of him hating her, and then he kissed her.

It was her first kiss.  And she couldn't possibly have imagined it going better.  It was tender and soft, not greedy, but emotional.  If she didn't know better, she'd guess from that kiss that he loved her.

But that couldn't be quite true.  He's a Malfoy.  Don't they naturally hate everyone?  Especially poor, pathetic people like her?  She didn't think he loved her.  The very thought made her chest tighten in pain.  He still got on that train.  And he had said no when she asked about seeing him when he returned.  So what was that kiss all about?

She ran her fingers over her lips, for the millionth time.  Everything seemed so right about that kiss.  But he was –

"Gin!  Your turn!"

She looked across the table at Ron.  He was watching her with raised eyebrows.  She looked down at their chess game.  Her heart certainly wasn't in it.

"Ron, I –"

"Come on, Gin, at least finish this game?"

She sighed and scanned the pieces.  She wasn't doing very well.  A few poor moves and the game would be over.  She moved her bishop, taking his rook.  She knew that left her open for an attack from his queen.  She pretended not to notice.

"You look really tired, Gin.  Anything going on?"

She shook her head, not missing the suspecting tone of his voice.  While Ron considered his move, she casually glanced over at Harry.  She did a double take.  He was sitting on the sofa a few away, reading his book on Quidditch.  He was always reading that book.  And he always wore the same awed expression.

The firelight dancing on his face, his messy hair in his bright eager eyes, his soft lips moving as he read the words to himself, his inviting neck, and his body... 

Ginny looked at him, but didn't feel the longing she normally did.  She frowned.  Two weeks ago, she would have been drooling over this image of Harry, sitting by the fire, reading a book.  And now?  Nothing.  Not a single spark.

Suddenly the image of her kissing Draco came flooding back to her mind.

She stood up abruptly.  And she realized that –

"Ron!  I have to…er…well, good game.  I better –"

            She ran.  She didn't turn back at the call of her name.  She didn't want to see the look on her brother's face.  She ran to her room and slammed the door shut.  She bounded to her bed and cowered under the covers.

            The kiss.  She swallowed.  She wasn't in love with Harry, anymore.  Actually she was beginning to doubt if she were ever in love with him.  The kiss.  She suspected that she might…no, she was fairly certain:  she loved Draco Malfoy.  That kiss…and he still said he doesn't want to see her again.

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

            "Your grades?"

            "Top of the class in all, but Transfiguration."

            "McGonagall.  I'll bet she's favoring that Granger girl.  No bother, doesn't really matter.  Top of the class.  Excellent."

            Draco and his father were sitting in his father's study at the Manor.  He'd just arrived, giving his case, cloak, and coat to several house elves.  Draco was eager to get up to his room, so that he could take another long nap until the meeting that night.

            "I've hand selected your attire for the evening.  It's in your changing room.  But go now.  Get some rest.  You look an awful mess."
            Draco nodded, standing and stalking to the door.  His dry throat itched, and he coughed.  It echoed in the large room.  He left through the huge open double doors.  He knew these doors always remained open.  Some sort of strange habit his father had.  His father only closed the doors during dealings of important matters.  So if the doors were shut, everyone knew not to disturb his father, under penalty of death.

            In the hallway, he found a small house elf.  He asked for a glass of water to be brought up to his room.

            "Anything else, Master Draco?"
            He shook his head, coughing again.  The dryness in his throat was irritating and stubbornly itchy.  He started the trek to his room, climbing stairs, walking down endless hallways until he reached his wing of the Manor.  His quarters were large, several rooms, taking up nearly a fifth of the Manor.  Being the only child allotted him many such luxuries.  Including his very own house elves.  Three house elves.

            "Your water, Master Draco."
            He reached down, taking the glass from Maggy, his favorite house elf.  She'd been serving him since he was a small boy.  He drank greedily, trying to alleviate the strange itchy sensation in this throat.  His rooms were exactly as he'd left them.  They were cleaned, of course, but they were more or less in the same order.  He walked straight through to his bedroom, with Maggy at his heels.

            Draco coughed again.  He grimaced, not liking the feeling.  Bugger.  But he was too sleepy to really care.

            Without undressing or even shutting the window dressings, he collapsed into his bed.  Maggy squealed and pulled his shoes off.  She tried pulling the covers over him, but it was hopeless.  She shut the window shades, and lit the fire in the fireplace before leaving her master to rest.

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

            She checked her wristwatch.  It was dinnertime.  But she was not going to eat.  She couldn't.  There was a gnawing pain in her stomach.  She felt sick.  Forget about going to dinner, she thought, I don't think I can even roll out of bed.  Oh Merlin.  She closed her eyes, imagining where Draco might be at this hour.

            Was it time for their meeting?  Or did the ceremony already occur?  Did it hurt to receive the Dark Mark?

            She closed her eyes, the pain causing her to wince.  She took a deep, shuddering breath.

            Ginny tried sitting up.  She managed to do so perfectly fine.  She knew she wasn't sick to her stomach.  She just felt sick to her stomach.  But that didn't change the pain nonetheless.  She walked over to the mirror and evaluated herself with sleepy eyes.

            "Eww…"

            That was all that the mirror managed to say.  And Ginny had to agree.  It was rather a scary sight.  Her hair was a fiery mess, tangled and matted.  Her eyes had circles around them, looking sunken and dark.  Her face was pale, a whiter shade than normal.  Her rumpled clothes didn't add much to her appearance either.

            She set to work, fixing herself up.  She combed out her hair, pinning it back, the way her mum always did it.  She washed her face and even pressed a cold washcloth to her eyes.  She didn't bother changing her clothes, figuring nobody really noticed or cared.

            She checked her wristwatch again.  Dinnertime.

            She wandered the halls slowly, counting the number of stairs she walked down, looking closely at the paintings, carefully avoiding stepping on all the cracks in the stone floors.  Ginny had spent hours wandering around the castle over the years.  Usually, it was just to keep occupied, a way to relieve stress.  She had to admit, despite years of exploring the castle, she didn't fully understand all of the mysteries of the school.

            She smiled sadly, things aren't always what they seem.  Footsteps behind her brought her back to reality, snapping her out of her meandering mood.

            Ginny looked over her shoulder.  It was Harry.  He jogged a bit to catch up to her.

            "Heading to dinner, Ginny?"

            "Er…yes."

            They walked in silence, side by side.  It wasn't the same comfortable, warm silence that she shared with Draco.  This was an annoying, rather embarrassing silence.  They were headed for the Great Hall.

            "Loads of assignments.  And it's the holidays!  Can you believe that?"  Ginny tried making conversation.  Harry looked a little surprised that she had spoken first.  And without mumbling, stuttering, or…putting her elbow in the butter, as she thought of it.

            "Yeah.  If you're talking about Snape…I can…"  He smiled down at her.

            They entered the Great Hall together.  She sat down next to Ron, and Harry seated himself beside Hermione.  The meal passed rather quickly, Ron and Harry talking about some Quidditch team.  Ginny wished she were sitting beside Hermione, who also looked rather bored by the topic.  

A large owl swooped in, dropped a package in Ginny's lap and flew back out of the Hall.  This is an odd time for the post, she thought.  She tore open the package, and found a card.  She smiled.  It was obviously hand-made, and that made even more precious to her.  It read "Happy Christmas, Ginny!" across the front in mismatching letters.  The inside was signed by all six of her brothers and Harry.

She looked up at Ron and Harry.  They were both pretending to be looking around the room, Ron whistling, and Harry twiddling his thumbs.

"What is this?"

They turned back to her and smiled.

"Sorry it's late.  Open it, Gin!"

She tore open the rest of the package to produce a box.  She peeked inside.  Her mouth dropped open.  She stared back up at Ron, wide-eyed.

"We all pitched in, Gin.  You like 'em?"

Ginny felt her body starting to shake slightly.  She opened the box all of the way and peered inside.

They'd all pooled their money to buy her a nice new pair of shoes.  They were wonderful.  Knowing they must be expensive, and that her brothers could hardly afford to buy new things for themselves…

Ginny burst into tears, letting Ron hug her.  She was silently thankful she'd chosen to slip on her tattered sneakers, not the new black shoes, for dinner.

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

            Draco awoke to the sound of a softly tinkling silver bell.  That was the way Maggy always woke him up.  He rolled over in his huge bed, rubbing his eyes.  Parts of his legs were numb.  He'd slept in his clothes, insteading of changing.  Serves him right, he supposed.

            He stood from the bed, glancing at the clock.  Nearly 6:30.

            He wandered into his bathroom, where a hot bath was already drawn for him.  He was confused.  He looked around at Maggy, who was trying to straighten the bed up.

            "What's this?"

            "You's to have a bath, Master Draco."  She tugged at the sheets.

            "I always shower, you know that."

            "Master said you's to take a bath."  She smoothed the down comforters over the bed.

            A bath.  Draco sneered.  It was like stewing in your filth.  He raised his eyebrows, coming up with, what he considered, a brilliant solution.  He undressed and took a shower, washing up best as he could.  Then he stepped into the bath. 

Oh.  Well, he could certainly see why so many people enjoy baths.  Quite relaxing, luxurious.

            "Not too long, Master Draco, you's to be ready by 7:30!"  Maggy yelled through the closed door.  Draco cleaned up, and stepped out of the bath.  He made a mental note to try a bath again, sometime.  He put on his thick bath robe.  And now to his changing room.

He stepped out of the bathroom, walking past his closets and into his changing room.  This was where he was normally fitted for his clothes.  And where he tried things on.  It was shaped like an octagon, each side a floor-to-ceiling mirror.  There was a small platform in the center of the room for his fittings and such. 

But now, the room was empty, save the mannequin wearing a fantastically expensive suit, layered with grand robes.  They looked much like his father's finest.  He licked his lips, resigning himself to his fate.

Draco took a deep breath, and started to dress methodically.  He slipped off his bathrobe, and put on his underclothes and socks.

He tried to think calmly.  He'd partition his mind.  They can have the part of him that they wanted.

Draco pulled the pants up each leg, tugging them to his waist.  He fastened the pants, and reached for his belt.

They'd expected him to join for years, after the way he mocked muggle-borns with such malevolence…Isn't that what he wanted?  To be a Death Eater like his father? 

Draco looked at himself in the mirror, buttoning up his white dress shirt.  He tucked the ends into his pants.

But they can have the part of him they wanted.  The part that had the will to dominate.  To win at any cost.  The part of him that felt the need to belittle others. 

Draco slipped on the black dress coat, adjusting the sleeves of his shirt underneath.  He buttoned the coat, smoothing it out.

They can have that part of his mind. 

Draco reached for the robes.

He knew that part existed, and he was willing to give them what they wanted.  They wanted Draco Malfoy's malice.  They wanted Draco Malfoy's intelligence.  But they also wanted Draco Malfoy's spirit.

And that was the part of him that he was unwilling to share.  Not with them.  Not with the world.  Not with anyone.  He'll partition himself in, hiding himself from everyone.

            He heaved a deep sigh, looking at himself in the mirrors.  Fully dressed, his hair slicked back to the nape of his neck.  He tilted his head, looking at himself in the different mirrors.  He looked just like his father.  He looked older, more refined.  Though inside he felt like a wreck.

            Stepping close to one of the mirrors, he looked at himself closely.  He looked into his own eyes.  He saw the fear, but that was only because he was looking for it.  He closed his eyes, upon feeling a shiver pass through him.  A sense of dread.  Foreboding.  Doom.  He heaved a deep sigh.

            When he opened his eyes, he looked at himself again.  He knew that the world would not see Draco Malfoy.  They'd only see the Death Eater.  He choked down a sob.  He looked at himself.  They'd only see the monster in him.  Unable to pull his eyes away, he stared at the blond boy in the mirror for several minutes.

Feeling angry and helpless, he threw his fist into the mirror, shattering the image of himself staring so coolly back at him.  He straightened himself, adjusting the cuff of his coat sleeve as Maggy came running in, screaming.

            Blood dripped from his knuckles, and the panicked house elf mended him quickly.  What's gotten into him lately?  Breaking things?  He nearly smiled.  It felt so good. 

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

U2 – Even Better Than the Real Thing

Chapter 13 – Heroes
David Bowie or The Wallflowers

For complete listings, check previous chapters, or:

http://www.lorddave.com/evenbetter/song_lyrics.htm

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

Author's Notes:

Whew.  What do you think?  Well, they kissed.  I know people have been requesting that.  This chapter was titled after my favorite David Bowie song.  I really like the Wallflowers cover, because I thought it was really well done.  And I like the Wallflowers a lot.  I considered using 6th Ave. Heartache for this chapter, but the lyrics didn't apply at all.

I really really really wanted to title the chapter Enjoy the Silence, a song by Depeche Mode, but the last chapter was Depeche Mode.  Its lyrics ARE this chapter.  So perfect!  Here's a link for the lyrics, and try listening to it, great song!!!  I might use it for a later chapter.

http://www.lorddave.com/evenbetter/enjoy.htm

So, let's see.  You'll notice as the chapter progressed, both Draco and Ginny's thoughts were pulled away from each other.  So Draco didn't think of Ginny once since he reached home.  And Ginny was getting distracted by her late Christmas present.  (I know the bonus present means Ron got her two things.  But he's her best friend!  And her other brothers sent her little things too, but they were little things, like a few prank treats from the twins, a stuffed dragon from Charlie, a pair of Egyptian earrings from Bill, etc.  So they all pitched in, Harry included, to buy her something she's wanted for a long time.) 

The fact that Harry even chipped in is important.  It's a present from her brothers…and they included Harry.  He's one of the brothers now.  So this is sort of developing on the Harry-Ginny relationship a little.  She's realized she's not really that infatuated with him, though she still thinks he's attractive.  He's starting to act strange around her, trying to be comfortable, but afraid she might still like him.  I think Harry wants Ginny to be just like a little sister, nothing more.  So it's weird when your little sister fancies you.  Eww!  Hehe…

So Draco's cool.  I like him.  He breaks things.  That's his thing.  He's going to have to outgrow it.  I gave him a slight cough.  I'm not sure what that'll mean, yet.  He might be getting sick.  We'll see.

Plans for next chapter:  We'll see a little bit of what happens a few days later, after Draco has returned and school has resumed.  How is Draco coping?  How is Ginny doing?  Will they have any encounters?  And what will happen when they meet?  I might even have the Quidditch match (Slytherin vs. Gryffindor, of course) I mentioned ages ago.  Could make things tense between Draco and Harry & Ron.

So, I love feedback.  Please review!

Till next time –

-- Eclipsed Planet

*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~~*

A few references:

-- Bath = stewing in own filth:  Calvin & Hobbes comic strip a long time ago, also Friends episode where Chandler finally takes a bath and quite enjoys it.

-- Partitioning of the mind:  a concept I stole from The Sword of Truth series.  I think Richard does this in the first book to save himself from the Mordsith.  I thought it was a really interesting concept.  He saved himself because he locked off everything that was important to him, mainly his love for Kahlan.  Very sweet.  I touched on that.  I'll possibly hit that again later.