"Eventually the wounds will heal and close." I thought about what Kenshin
had said. The wounds will eventually heal and close. But there will always
be the scar. It's hard for me to pretend that I don't care she's gone. I
won't just pretend it doesn't matter and that it had no impact on my life,
like how it did. Kaoru is dead. She's gone. She isn't coming back. I was
tired of being sad; of course I always would, just as the scar.
I stood and opened a fusuma that led to a coolish outside.Grey clouds floated slowly overhead. I stepped down from the porch I had come out on, onto the ground. I looked up to the sky, at the soon breaking clouds. There was a roll of thunder in the distance as a single tear fell down my cheek.
This is the last time, Kaoru. This is the last time I'm crying over you. Though my wound is little less fresh than it was that day months ago, I have to allow myself to heal. Just tell me you're with me always. Then this will be the last time. I'm not crying anymore. This is the last time, Kaoru. I don't want to cry anymore.
My stomach heaved inward and I gave a gasp. I let myself fall to the ground and layed on my back, staring up at the grey sky. Giving a sob, a tear slid down my cheek and light droplets of rain began to fall.
This is the last time. I'm not crying anymore. I'm not crying...
I shivered in the cool air and the rain, as rain and tears fell down my face indistinctly. All over again, the sorrow and grief, the anger and hopelessness all flooded back now to memory, as fresh as it was the day she died. And all over again, I wanted reality to just stop.
When I had finished crying, and the rain had slowed to a drizzle, I stood from the ground and dusted myself off. By a river where I sometimes practiced, I gathered a small bundle of flowers and found myself in front of the Shuei Yakuza once again, not since the last years that Kaoru was live.
It looked as it always did, so familiar, but not welcoming. Foot imprints in the muddy sand and dirt around it had been mostly flooded over by the rain. I felt nothing for this place anymore; not even sadness or anger, simply nothing. I was entirely indifferent to this place now, it no longer meant anything.
Approaching the steps and low porch, I set the flowers down on the porch, sheltering them from the rain. I stood at the steps and bowed my head for a moment. After a moment, I raised my head.
"I'm sorry, Kaoru. I miss you." I left the Yakuza to go back home, to try and move on.
At the dojo, I found myself again in Kaoru's invisible presence, in the training room. Unused swords lined the walls, indicating a time when they were once before, but put away for seemingly the last time.
"You are the heir of the Kamiya Kasshin. Kaoru would've wanted you to carry on the tradition taught to her by her father, and then you can teach it to others, and bring it even farther. Yahiko, you are the heir. You can keep Kaoru's presence alive." That seemed like something Kenshin would say to me. But could I believe it myself? Could I find the strength to continue what she had taught me? Could I live with that wound? I could try. Maybe Kaoru would've wanted it. Could I pick up a sword once again?
I unsteadily approached a wrack of wooden swords and pulled one out. It was several years old and had been used many times before, but still good. I put the wooden practice sword back. I walked across the long, wooden planks of the floor to the other end. I knew Kaoru's sword was here, from looking in this place when I came here. This was the last place she put it before she died. I approached the sword and with a quivering hand, and touched it. I wrapped my hand around the handle and pulled the long sword out. It was like a sudden, overwhelming glimpse of beauty. I walked to the center of the long, rectangular room. For a moment, the sword only stayed at my side.
I raised it slowly, remembering a form Kaoru used to practice when she wasn't teaching me. I secretly used to love to watch her when she practiced, and I began to memorize it myself. I patiently waited for memory to kick in. I knew every step and movement by heart, but I had never dared try it myself before. I thrust the sword forward and heard the air swish. I turned around and sliced, twirling a circle over my head as I turned back with her sword. There was a kick here, I knew, and another slice.
And then, suddenly, I was done. I stopped from where I was, and bowed and felt my knees weaken from pressure. I collapsed on the floor and held myself for a moment, panting, trying to keep myself together.
"Kaoru, you didn't have to die," I whispered throatily. "Didn't you have a choice? Didn't you try to stop him before he killed you?" I recieved no answer and I became very aware of the silence swallowing the room. "If you could've stopped him, why didn't you? Did you want to die? Did you want us all to be sad and mourn over you?" I said softly. Again, there was no reply, not that I expected one. "So, you're dead? Is that how it's going to work out? I guess so; I know you can't be brought back," I said. "I still wish you could've though. But, I need to move on," I said and slowly found the strength to stand up. I hugged myself for a moment before I hung my head again and closed my eyes, resisting back the tears that begged to pour from my eyes, as if to never stop. "You were my family, and I loved you as my friend, a real, true friend," I said finally.
~Spring can heal wounds like no remedy~
Sunlight streamed into the dojo and I stood confidantly there. I raised Kaoru's old sword and approached a young boy swinging disorderly and without grace. I stood by him and raised the sword in front of me and pulled down, completing a forward swipe.
"Just aim, and swipe; don't try and put too much force behind it yet, and keep it straight," I instructed the boy. A memory of me when I was younger, practicing, came to mind. He nodded and continued to practice his swiping technique as I walked away.
Am I doing what's right Kaoru? Do you want this? I thought. Is this good? What you've hoped for? I want to take this farther, I want to take the Kamiya Kasshin and teach its ways, so that it can continue into the next generation. This is right, isn't it Kaoru?
At the other end of the room was a more advanced student, trying to master a different technique. I stood beside him and showed him the technique properly.
"You almost have it. And once the sword is in place here, you have to make sure you turn it just enough so that it finishes with a clean cut," I said to the boy who nodded. I stepped away and watched the boys and girls who were my students. I sincerely hoped I could inspire in them a real love for the Kamiya Kasshin as Kaoru had in me so many years ago.
Kaoru, the last time I saw you...
The End ~~~~~~~~~~
That was a short, little nice story I wrote with a nice finish. It was short, but did you like it?
I stood and opened a fusuma that led to a coolish outside.Grey clouds floated slowly overhead. I stepped down from the porch I had come out on, onto the ground. I looked up to the sky, at the soon breaking clouds. There was a roll of thunder in the distance as a single tear fell down my cheek.
This is the last time, Kaoru. This is the last time I'm crying over you. Though my wound is little less fresh than it was that day months ago, I have to allow myself to heal. Just tell me you're with me always. Then this will be the last time. I'm not crying anymore. This is the last time, Kaoru. I don't want to cry anymore.
My stomach heaved inward and I gave a gasp. I let myself fall to the ground and layed on my back, staring up at the grey sky. Giving a sob, a tear slid down my cheek and light droplets of rain began to fall.
This is the last time. I'm not crying anymore. I'm not crying...
I shivered in the cool air and the rain, as rain and tears fell down my face indistinctly. All over again, the sorrow and grief, the anger and hopelessness all flooded back now to memory, as fresh as it was the day she died. And all over again, I wanted reality to just stop.
When I had finished crying, and the rain had slowed to a drizzle, I stood from the ground and dusted myself off. By a river where I sometimes practiced, I gathered a small bundle of flowers and found myself in front of the Shuei Yakuza once again, not since the last years that Kaoru was live.
It looked as it always did, so familiar, but not welcoming. Foot imprints in the muddy sand and dirt around it had been mostly flooded over by the rain. I felt nothing for this place anymore; not even sadness or anger, simply nothing. I was entirely indifferent to this place now, it no longer meant anything.
Approaching the steps and low porch, I set the flowers down on the porch, sheltering them from the rain. I stood at the steps and bowed my head for a moment. After a moment, I raised my head.
"I'm sorry, Kaoru. I miss you." I left the Yakuza to go back home, to try and move on.
At the dojo, I found myself again in Kaoru's invisible presence, in the training room. Unused swords lined the walls, indicating a time when they were once before, but put away for seemingly the last time.
"You are the heir of the Kamiya Kasshin. Kaoru would've wanted you to carry on the tradition taught to her by her father, and then you can teach it to others, and bring it even farther. Yahiko, you are the heir. You can keep Kaoru's presence alive." That seemed like something Kenshin would say to me. But could I believe it myself? Could I find the strength to continue what she had taught me? Could I live with that wound? I could try. Maybe Kaoru would've wanted it. Could I pick up a sword once again?
I unsteadily approached a wrack of wooden swords and pulled one out. It was several years old and had been used many times before, but still good. I put the wooden practice sword back. I walked across the long, wooden planks of the floor to the other end. I knew Kaoru's sword was here, from looking in this place when I came here. This was the last place she put it before she died. I approached the sword and with a quivering hand, and touched it. I wrapped my hand around the handle and pulled the long sword out. It was like a sudden, overwhelming glimpse of beauty. I walked to the center of the long, rectangular room. For a moment, the sword only stayed at my side.
I raised it slowly, remembering a form Kaoru used to practice when she wasn't teaching me. I secretly used to love to watch her when she practiced, and I began to memorize it myself. I patiently waited for memory to kick in. I knew every step and movement by heart, but I had never dared try it myself before. I thrust the sword forward and heard the air swish. I turned around and sliced, twirling a circle over my head as I turned back with her sword. There was a kick here, I knew, and another slice.
And then, suddenly, I was done. I stopped from where I was, and bowed and felt my knees weaken from pressure. I collapsed on the floor and held myself for a moment, panting, trying to keep myself together.
"Kaoru, you didn't have to die," I whispered throatily. "Didn't you have a choice? Didn't you try to stop him before he killed you?" I recieved no answer and I became very aware of the silence swallowing the room. "If you could've stopped him, why didn't you? Did you want to die? Did you want us all to be sad and mourn over you?" I said softly. Again, there was no reply, not that I expected one. "So, you're dead? Is that how it's going to work out? I guess so; I know you can't be brought back," I said. "I still wish you could've though. But, I need to move on," I said and slowly found the strength to stand up. I hugged myself for a moment before I hung my head again and closed my eyes, resisting back the tears that begged to pour from my eyes, as if to never stop. "You were my family, and I loved you as my friend, a real, true friend," I said finally.
~Spring can heal wounds like no remedy~
Sunlight streamed into the dojo and I stood confidantly there. I raised Kaoru's old sword and approached a young boy swinging disorderly and without grace. I stood by him and raised the sword in front of me and pulled down, completing a forward swipe.
"Just aim, and swipe; don't try and put too much force behind it yet, and keep it straight," I instructed the boy. A memory of me when I was younger, practicing, came to mind. He nodded and continued to practice his swiping technique as I walked away.
Am I doing what's right Kaoru? Do you want this? I thought. Is this good? What you've hoped for? I want to take this farther, I want to take the Kamiya Kasshin and teach its ways, so that it can continue into the next generation. This is right, isn't it Kaoru?
At the other end of the room was a more advanced student, trying to master a different technique. I stood beside him and showed him the technique properly.
"You almost have it. And once the sword is in place here, you have to make sure you turn it just enough so that it finishes with a clean cut," I said to the boy who nodded. I stepped away and watched the boys and girls who were my students. I sincerely hoped I could inspire in them a real love for the Kamiya Kasshin as Kaoru had in me so many years ago.
Kaoru, the last time I saw you...
The End ~~~~~~~~~~
That was a short, little nice story I wrote with a nice finish. It was short, but did you like it?