Even the Perfect Soldier Cries
Some people say the past can be overcome, that we can all move on from the horrible events in our lives that we choose to forget, but forgetting is not easy. Especially for some.
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Crawling in my skin These wounds they will not heal
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The gundam pilot of 01 lay awake one night not being able to sleep because of his all to real past. The events of his life were all to hard to forget, and they were now hitting him in his dreams. He sat up in his bed and looked around his room, seeing that he was back in reality, Heero quietly got out of bed and walked out of his room. The hallways were long,, considering the fact all of the gundam pilots were staying at The Winner Estate that Quatre, gundam pilot of 04 , owned. He crept past the rest of the bedrooms and made his way down a smaller hall. There. Heero saw something no one else could. Holding a yellow flower was the little girl that he had accidentally killed during a mission. She looked up at him with her big eyes and threw the flower on the floor. Heero closed his eyes and shook his head, knowing this was not real.
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Fear is how I fall Confusing what is real
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She was still there when he opened his eyes, standing there, smiling. He took two steps back and still the little girl stood, smiling. Heero quickly turned around and walked away from the hallway. It was all too strange; especially people from his past are now coming to him when he was awake. He turned now another hallway, and again saw something no one else could. Now the little girl was playing with her puppy, Mary. Heero walked away from that hallway as well.
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There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface Consuming/Confusing
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Heero walked down a set of stairs, He came to the bottom of the staircase and shook his head again and walked to a window and looked out. Again he saw another image of his past. There stood Dekim Barton and Dr. J in front of a eight year old Heero. After messing up, Dekim bent down and smacked the young boy down to the ground. And when the boy tried to get up, Dekim kicked him down again. Heero clenched his teeth, made a fist, and put it through the window.
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This lack of self-control I feel is never ending Controlling, I can't seem.
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Duo and Quate woke up when they heard the shattering glass. The both walked out of their rooms, and looked first at each other, then to where the noise was came from. Downstairs, Heero looked at his now bloody hand. It symbolized to him, the pain and suffering he went through, and still was going through. He walked from the now broken window . Quatre and Duo walked down the flight of stairs where they first heard the shattering glass, and discovered that the window had been broken. Duo looked down and saw blood and pointed this out to Quatre. There also appeared to be a trail of drips of blood, leading away from the window, and they both followed them.
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To find myself again My walls are closing in (Not a sense of confidence I convinced that there's too much pressure to take)
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Heero walked outside, hoping that just maybe that the night air would calm his nerves, and stop the images of his past. But this wasn't so. Heero saw himself, holding the detonation button. Walking away from the base, which he had just blown up. He saw the mobile suit fall, killing everyone in that building, discovering the little girls teddy bear, burying her dead dog. Then saw the peacekeepers he accidentally killed because of an OZ trick. He saw the innocent people he had killed when he first tried out the new type gundam Epyon. So many innocents.. He could not take any of this anymore. He took a handgun out, which he had found in the weapons cabinet, it to his forehead and shot off the gun.
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I've felt this way before So insecure..
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Wu Fei and Trowa woke up when they heard the gunshot and ran downstairs to find out who had shot off a gun. They had met up with Duo and Quatre, who were just as surprised to hear the shot. The followed the bloods trail to the weapons cabinet and found it open. While taking some pistols, the other gundam pilots wondered where Heero had gone. Surely he would have heard the gunshot and he would be the first to go after who ever shot the gun off. But with the weapons cabinet open and Heero missing. they all ran outside to where the gun shot came from. There, they all saw a sight, which they didn't want to see.
**************
Crawling in my skin These wounds they will not heal Fear is how I fall Confusing what is real
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Hidden behind a table, Heero sat on the ground with his knees up to his chest, hiding his face in his arms, which were around his knees. He had quickly changed his aim and shot the wall two inches from his head. The gun he used was next to him, along with some blood from his hand. Wu Fei thought this whole scene was pathetic; Trowa and Duo couldn't believe it and Quatre knew something was wrong. He took a step closer to Heero and suddenly stopped. Heero looked up and this shocked even Wu Fei. It appeared the he'd been crying, something the gundam pilots thought he couldn't do. He was the Perfect Soldier after all and he wasn't supposed to have emotion. But even the Perfect Soldier can have feeling.
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Discomfort inside me has pulled itself upon me
Distracting/Reacting
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Heero stood up and turned away from the others and began walking. Quatre began to follow him, hoping that maybe he'd be able to help him. But Duo told him he should be left alone, especially now. Heero walked up to another window and looked at his reflection.
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Against my will I stand beside my own reflection It's haunting, I can't seem.. To find myself again My walls are closing in (Not a sense of confidence I convinced that there's too much pressure to take) I've felt this way before, So insecure. **************
His reflection reveled his pathetic state, and he was appalled at sight. He should have put an end to this all, he shouldn't have missed he thought. It began to rain and Heero thought that God was feeling pity towards him. He looked back at the others and Duo and Quatre advanced a bit towards him. Heero turned completely around to see the last image of his horrible past, the images flicked in his mind. All the pain and suffering he had caused, the pain he had gotten, his horrible training, all the fighting. Trowa and Wu Fei moved closer, as Heero looked up at the sky. They stopped. Heero closed his eyes, clenched his fists and screamed one last scream for all the pain he felt and never could express.
**************
Crawling in my skin These wounds they will not heal Fear is how I fall Confusing what is real **************
Some people say the past can be overcome, that we can all move on from the horrible events in our lives that we choose to forget, but forgetting is not easy. Especially for some.
**************
Crawling in my skin These wounds they will not heal
**************
The gundam pilot of 01 lay awake one night not being able to sleep because of his all to real past. The events of his life were all to hard to forget, and they were now hitting him in his dreams. He sat up in his bed and looked around his room, seeing that he was back in reality, Heero quietly got out of bed and walked out of his room. The hallways were long,, considering the fact all of the gundam pilots were staying at The Winner Estate that Quatre, gundam pilot of 04 , owned. He crept past the rest of the bedrooms and made his way down a smaller hall. There. Heero saw something no one else could. Holding a yellow flower was the little girl that he had accidentally killed during a mission. She looked up at him with her big eyes and threw the flower on the floor. Heero closed his eyes and shook his head, knowing this was not real.
**************
Fear is how I fall Confusing what is real
**************
She was still there when he opened his eyes, standing there, smiling. He took two steps back and still the little girl stood, smiling. Heero quickly turned around and walked away from the hallway. It was all too strange; especially people from his past are now coming to him when he was awake. He turned now another hallway, and again saw something no one else could. Now the little girl was playing with her puppy, Mary. Heero walked away from that hallway as well.
**************
There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface Consuming/Confusing
**************
Heero walked down a set of stairs, He came to the bottom of the staircase and shook his head again and walked to a window and looked out. Again he saw another image of his past. There stood Dekim Barton and Dr. J in front of a eight year old Heero. After messing up, Dekim bent down and smacked the young boy down to the ground. And when the boy tried to get up, Dekim kicked him down again. Heero clenched his teeth, made a fist, and put it through the window.
**************
This lack of self-control I feel is never ending Controlling, I can't seem.
**************
Duo and Quate woke up when they heard the shattering glass. The both walked out of their rooms, and looked first at each other, then to where the noise was came from. Downstairs, Heero looked at his now bloody hand. It symbolized to him, the pain and suffering he went through, and still was going through. He walked from the now broken window . Quatre and Duo walked down the flight of stairs where they first heard the shattering glass, and discovered that the window had been broken. Duo looked down and saw blood and pointed this out to Quatre. There also appeared to be a trail of drips of blood, leading away from the window, and they both followed them.
**************
To find myself again My walls are closing in (Not a sense of confidence I convinced that there's too much pressure to take)
**************
Heero walked outside, hoping that just maybe that the night air would calm his nerves, and stop the images of his past. But this wasn't so. Heero saw himself, holding the detonation button. Walking away from the base, which he had just blown up. He saw the mobile suit fall, killing everyone in that building, discovering the little girls teddy bear, burying her dead dog. Then saw the peacekeepers he accidentally killed because of an OZ trick. He saw the innocent people he had killed when he first tried out the new type gundam Epyon. So many innocents.. He could not take any of this anymore. He took a handgun out, which he had found in the weapons cabinet, it to his forehead and shot off the gun.
**************
I've felt this way before So insecure..
**************
Wu Fei and Trowa woke up when they heard the gunshot and ran downstairs to find out who had shot off a gun. They had met up with Duo and Quatre, who were just as surprised to hear the shot. The followed the bloods trail to the weapons cabinet and found it open. While taking some pistols, the other gundam pilots wondered where Heero had gone. Surely he would have heard the gunshot and he would be the first to go after who ever shot the gun off. But with the weapons cabinet open and Heero missing. they all ran outside to where the gun shot came from. There, they all saw a sight, which they didn't want to see.
**************
Crawling in my skin These wounds they will not heal Fear is how I fall Confusing what is real
**************
Hidden behind a table, Heero sat on the ground with his knees up to his chest, hiding his face in his arms, which were around his knees. He had quickly changed his aim and shot the wall two inches from his head. The gun he used was next to him, along with some blood from his hand. Wu Fei thought this whole scene was pathetic; Trowa and Duo couldn't believe it and Quatre knew something was wrong. He took a step closer to Heero and suddenly stopped. Heero looked up and this shocked even Wu Fei. It appeared the he'd been crying, something the gundam pilots thought he couldn't do. He was the Perfect Soldier after all and he wasn't supposed to have emotion. But even the Perfect Soldier can have feeling.
**************
Discomfort inside me has pulled itself upon me
Distracting/Reacting
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Heero stood up and turned away from the others and began walking. Quatre began to follow him, hoping that maybe he'd be able to help him. But Duo told him he should be left alone, especially now. Heero walked up to another window and looked at his reflection.
**************
Against my will I stand beside my own reflection It's haunting, I can't seem.. To find myself again My walls are closing in (Not a sense of confidence I convinced that there's too much pressure to take) I've felt this way before, So insecure. **************
His reflection reveled his pathetic state, and he was appalled at sight. He should have put an end to this all, he shouldn't have missed he thought. It began to rain and Heero thought that God was feeling pity towards him. He looked back at the others and Duo and Quatre advanced a bit towards him. Heero turned completely around to see the last image of his horrible past, the images flicked in his mind. All the pain and suffering he had caused, the pain he had gotten, his horrible training, all the fighting. Trowa and Wu Fei moved closer, as Heero looked up at the sky. They stopped. Heero closed his eyes, clenched his fists and screamed one last scream for all the pain he felt and never could express.
**************
Crawling in my skin These wounds they will not heal Fear is how I fall Confusing what is real **************