FYI:

~Personal Thoughts~

~"Inner Voices"~

ESP

%The Written Word%

[Flashback]

"Normal Conversation (Duh)"

* Com Link or Telephone *

*Sound Effects (usually just Kurt's bamfing)

ROGUE

Thin's for the past week an' a half had been absolute havoc in the mansion. Nearly every night was like a party as students found out they passed this big final or that exam. So basically the week was spent having fun as Kurt, Piotr and I prepared ta graduate. Everyone was pretty excited, especially the professor ta see his second set of graduates. Ah found that everyone suddenly seemed interested in what Ah was gonna do now that Ah 'no longer had ta worry 'bout homework'. Ah didn't have the slightest clue how ta answer 'em so usually Ah came up with some lame excuse ta put it off or changed the subject.

Ah kept thinkin' 'bout when Remy an' Ah had first started datin'. We'd once had a conversation 'bout what Ah wanted ta do when Ah graduated an' Ah hadn't had a clue then either.

["What do y' want t' do when y' graduate, Marie?"

"Ah don't know. Ah guess Ah'll stay here like Scott an' Jean did."

"I don' see y' as doing dat, Cherie. Besides, Marie, y'd never be able t' stand de stick dat far up y' ass." I couldn't help but laugh as he looked at meh in his quiet wistful way.

"Yeah, Ah guess Ah can't see meh doin' that either. So what do ya see meh as doin' then, Sugah?"

"Living a normal life, unlike de rest of us. Y'd make one hell of a lawyer, seeing how much y' like t' argue."

"Yeah, Ah could just touch the witness ta see if they're lyin'." Laughin' he leaned over an' kissed the top of mah head.

"Dat y' could." Ah leaned mah head on his shoulder an' we sat there in silence for awhile.] (A/N: This is from Island in the Sun, Island in the Sun)

~Well, Ah guess thin's haven't changed much since school started this year. Good ta know Ah'm still completely clueless. Can't imagine goin' through all that schoolin' just ta be a lawyer. Though Ah might change mah mind after a year out. Thin's change, man is that ever obvious.~ Ah glanced across the community room, where we were currently throwin' a party for Amara an' Tabitha passin' their Algebra final, ta watch the professor an' Magneto talkin'. Still can't get over the fact that he's here. He looked up at meh an' Ah scowled at him in return. ~Ah could be writin' back ta Remy right now, but no…Ah've got ta be in the same room as him.~

Ah looked elsewhere so Ah didn't attract ta much attention for bein' ta anti-social. Ah saw Kitty gigglin' like a hyena at somethin' Jubes had said while she held onta Piotr's arm. Betsy was hangin' close by an' had a phone in hand. ~Guess she just got done talkin' ta Warren.~ "Hey, luv! Got something to tell you."

Ah walked over ta her tryin' ta feign indifference. "What's that?"

"Warren's coming down tomorrow. He'll be here for your graduation. Isn't that sweet of him, luv?"

"Uh huh." Ah rolled mah eyes knowin' he wasn't comin' ta see meh, Piotr, or Kurt but ta spend some extra time with Bets. Ah wasn't gonna spoil her good mood though as Ah just smiled.

The next day went by exceptionally normal. Ah sat between Piotr an' Kurt for the ceremonies an' glanced up once inta the stands ta see the others watchin' us. Logan grinned at meh in what was becomin' an extremely fatherly way. Betsy was sittin' next ta Warren, no surprise there, the professor, Beast with an image inducer of course, Ororo, Miss Frost, Kitty, Amanda, an' all the other students as well.

Principle Kelly gave some long speech about how some 'students' had advantages over the others but that they shouldn't be discouraged. Let's just say he picked up where he left off last year when, well, when I interrupted the graduation with some help from Mesmero.

Ah must have seemed like a complete nervous wreck, 'cause Ah was so afraid that somethin' else would happen. That Apocalypse would somehow come back an' spoil mah day just like he'd made meh spoil Jean an' Scott's. Nothin' did happen an' Ah got mah diploma just like everyone else.

Of course there were two big long pauses when they called Remy and John. Obviously some dumb secretary made the mistake of never takin' 'em out of the records. Piotr placed a kind hand on mine when Remy's name was called an' nobody went across stage so then they finally decided ta move on. ~He's sad ta. Ah can sense it. Of course he is, they were his two best friends.~ Ah glanced at him an' his head was hangin' down so Ah couldn't see his face. "Ya okay?" Ah whispered so that Ah didn't get noticed by everyone else.

"Yes, I am fine." He didn't sound ta sure of himself but Ah decided ta let it go.

"Just checkin'." He glanced up at meh for a moment then removed his hand as he looked back ta Kitty sittin' in the stands. Ah bit mah lip ta keep from laughin'. ~Ya got ta be kiddin' meh. He's worried that Kitty might geek over somethin' that li'l?~

"Congratulations, Stripes." Ah found mahself bein' pulled inta a huge bear, er wolf, hug by Logan.

"Thanks, but Ah can't breath." The words barely came out as a whisper as Ah tried ta start breathin' 'gain once he let go. He tossled mah hair as he grinned. ~Yep, just like some proud papa.~ Amanda an' Kitty were cooin' over Kurt an' Piotr respectfully, an' Betsy was holdin' Warren's hand casually as they talked. Ah felt a li'l left out since everyone was seemingly paired off on meh. Sam an' Rahne, Bobby an' Amara, Ray an' Jubilee, Jamie an' Sarah, Ororo an' Logan, Miss Frost an' Beast, even Roberto got up the courage ta talk ta Tabitha an' Dani. Everybody seemed ta have someone they could celebrate with an' talk ta. Everyone but meh that is.

Ah sensed the professor approachin' meh an' turned ta face him. "Somethin' ya want?"

"Yes, I was wondering if you've considered any plans for your future." Magneto showed up at his shoulder an' smirked as Ah struggled for an intelligent way of sayin' Ah didn't have a clue. ~Who invited him inta this conversation!~

"Yes, tell us Rogue." I glared at him before Ah answered.

"Well, Ah don't really know ta be honest. If Ah do go ta college, Ah'll probably end up waitin' a year just so Ah can relax a li'l…" ~This is soundin' really dumb, but then that's how Ah feel right now.~

"That's understandable. Will you be staying with us in the meantime? You know you're always welcome to."

"Ah know, but Ah was actually thinkin' 'bout takin' a break from the X-Men as well." He looked a li'l shocked an' Ah'm grossly underestimatin' that one. Magneto looked slightly taken back as well.

"That's not a good idea, Charles. She's a prime target for Apocalypse if and when he comes back."

"Key word, Bucket Head, 'if'. None of us know for sure if he's ever gonna show face again. Ah'm not gonna spend the rest of mah life worryin' 'bout some age old creep." He scowled at mah slam as he once more pleaded ta the professor ta make meh change mah mind.

"You know as well as I do, Charles, that the world is no longer safe for mutants." The professor sighed as he rested his head in his hands in thought.

And where do you plan on going, Rogue? Ah smiled when Ah realized that the professor had made this conversation more private.

Don't really know. Ah just thought Ah'd go where ever Ah felt like, see the country or somethin'. He frowned at meh but continued ta use telepathy.

There is nothing I can do to stop you, Rogue. You are eighteen and old enough to make decisions for yourself, but I hope that you will not do anything to rash.

When have Ah ever been rash? Ah gave him an innocent smile as Magneto looked from meh ta the professor questioningly.

Must I list the times?

No, Ah get the idea, proff. Really, though, Ah can take care of mahself, an' ya shouldn't worry 'bout meh.

I'm afraid that I'm not the one who will be doing the most worrying. It was mah turn ta look puzzled as he glanced over at Logan who was now talkin' ta Kurt.

"Oh." Ah swallowed hard as Ah thought 'bout how hard Kurt would take it if Ah left. Then there was Logan who would more than likely follow meh ta make sure 'Stripes' stayed in one piece while anyone Ah would happen ta meet would end up in several pieces. "Ah still think that Ah need some time away from the institute." Magneto frowned again ta see that Ah was still stubbornly stickin' ta mah choice. Ah turned an' walked away slowly leavin' mah friends an' what had become mah family behind.

Ah walked the longest way back ta the institute an' was surprised ta see that no one was back there yet. Ah decided ta use the time ta write ta Remy since Ah'd been so preoccupied for so long.

%Friday, June 4, 2004

Dear Remy,

I know it's been a really long time since I was last able to write but things have been absolutely crazy around here. With all the exams and finals I had to study for and then there was the prom that Kitty dragged me to, well, there hasn't been much spare time for letter writing. Still can't believe that for as long as I live I'll never have to do anymore homework, or study for anymore tests, or do anything of the sort. It's still hard for me to believe that I've graduated from high school. Seems like just yesterday was Homecoming.

Prom was a complete bore. I stood around like a wallflower the entire time for lack of anything better to do. Of course there were some guys who came up to talk to me. They obviously didn't recognize me as one of the mutants after I'd gone through Betsy and Kitty's makeover. I turned them all down flat on their faces and that proved to be my only entertainment. Well, you probably want some better visuals, huh? I wore an emerald green dress that had some silver adorning it. It had some pretty designs stitched into the edge in a silver metallic thread and I wore a pair of long green opera gloves. Nothing really fancy about the style.

Everyone's been bugging me asking me the usual questions. Are you going to college? What are you going to do this summer? Are you going to stay at the institute? What do you want to do now? If you leave, will you miss me? That last one was Jamie of course, the little sweetheart. I don't know how to answer any of those questions. I've been avoiding them for as long as I could but now that I'm out of school, I don't have much choice but to answer them for my own sake.

You probably don't remember but way back at the beginning of the school year you asked me the same question. I didn't know the answer then either and had told you I'd probably stay at the institute. Now that I think back, you're right, I'm not cut out for this place. I simply wouldn't be able to stand a stick that far up my ass if I became an instructor here. Besides, it would be simply to weird to be teaching the kids that I've been training among for so long.

I can't stand Magneto anymore. He's worse than everyone else about asking me what I'm going to do. Pisses me off to no end when he gets this little grin when I tell him and everyone else that I really don't know. I don't know why everyone expects me, of all people, to have my mind made up. Not even Jean knew what she really wanted to do. But then she at least knew she wanted more than just a high school education. She's cut out for that whole preppy college thing; I'm not.

Hmm…wonder what special day is coming up on the seventeenth, could it be a certain Cajun's birthday? I know you're birthday's almost two weeks away, but I thought I'd send you your gift early. I hope you like them. You've been using a lot of Three Doors Down lyrics lately so I thought you might like their CD and I threw in Avril Levigne's since I've been using hers. Wow, you're twenty now. One more year, and then you'll be able to legally drink. Don't think that matters to you much, but still it's kind of a big deal for most people. I guess next year, I'll have to send you a case of beer, but what would be the point? You'd just go out and steal one if you wanted to. Yeah, I know there's this code of yours that says that you only steal from the rich and then it's really only acquiring or something. Doesn't make it right, you know.

Sorry, I didn't mean to go preaching to you like that. I'm glad to hear that things have quieted down for you in New Orleans. Maybe things will start looking up for you. I'm kind of surprised that you let your pride get hurt so easily when someone teases you about being from New Orleans or something like that. Thought you were tougher than that. Didn't think you'd let it get to you either that I called you a pervert. Hmm…then again, you really are that second guy, the really sweet one, when you want to be. You should just let that side of you show more often.

I'm sorry that you feel I was poking fun at your Tante Mattie. She really is a pretty smart lady. She'd have to be to keep you under a tight reign. So, I'm sorry that you think that way. I'm not that mean to pick on somebody's Tante. That's like a thousand times worse than a 'your momma' joke.

I thought I should tell you that by the time you get this letter, I'll have probably already left the mansion. I don't know how long I'll be gone nor if and when I'll be back. So don't send anymore letters. I'll start them again when I settle down someplace again, so don't worry about me. Like I told the professor, I can take care of myself and I think that everyone should simply have a little faith that the 'Rogue One' can handle things.

I'm mostly worried that Logan will try and follow me. It's not that I want to get away from certain people here, it's just that I need away from the whole system. I'm tired of fighting, at least for now, and everybody is always talking about how I'm a hero. I don't feel that way and it's starting to grate on my nerves.

So please, Remy, don't do something stupid like show up here or anything, thinking I'm trying to ignore you. I really am going away from the institute for a while and have absolutely no clue where the road's going to take me. Thought I'd take your advice and just take a page out of your book and just ride off sometime with my bike. The more I think about it the better it sounds.

Rogue

P.S. Went back home again, This sucks, gotta pack up and leave again, Say goodbye to all my friends, Can't say when I'll be there again, It's time now to turn around, Turn my back on everything, everything—'Mobile' Avril Levigne

P.S.S. It's all right that your letter was short. Some days there just isn't anything to write about.%

I put the letter inta a small box with the two CD which I'd wrapped in some bubble wrap for protection on their long journey ta N' Awlins. As Ah walked back downstairs ta drop the box inta the mail pile the others were comin' back in the front door.

"Oh, like there you are!"

"Ja, ve zought ja vere going to miss ja own graduation party." Bobby grabbed mah arm an' dragged meh inta the community room where they'd already decked it out for the party. Ah plastered on a smile an' tried ta have a good time but kept thinkin' 'bout mah choice ta leave the institute.

"So what now, luv?" Ah knew Ah couldn't avoid the truth anymore.

"Ah'm leavin'." Everythin' in the room stopped in one instant as everyone's attention turned on meh.

"Like for college, right?" Ah shook mah head no kind of panic stricken by the sudden attention.

"Ah'm…just goin'."

"Vhere?"

"Why?"

"When"

"So who's the guy?" Tabitha got a sharp jab in the ribs as Ah felt like mah head was gonna spin 'til it came clean off.

"Um…Ah don't know. Ah just feel like Ah need ta get away. An' Ah think soon. Did Ah catch all the questions?"

"You didn't answer mine," Tabitha muttered under her breath.

"That's 'cause there ain't no guy."

"Then like why would you want to leave all your friends?"

"Ah don't want ta leave mah friends! Ah just need ta go away for awhile." Ah couldn't explain the way Ah was feelin' an' everybody was demandin' answers that Ah couldn't give.

Ah turned an' quickly left the room before the tears of frustration could come. Ah was nearly at the end of the hall when Ah felt a hand on mah shoulder bringin' meh ta a stop. Ah turned ta see everyone's favorite Russian standin' there. "What is it, Piotr?"

"Will you tell Remy hello for me?" Ah looked up at him astonished.

"What…why do ya think Ah'm goin' ta see him?" He looked down at the ground as he answered meh.

"I saw the letters you were writing." Ah could feel mah face growin' red as he eventually looked at meh. "I mean, I only saw the envelopes. Never anything that you wrote."

"Well, Ah ain't goin' ta N' Awlins." He seemed embarrassed ta admit this ta me an' Ah was tryin' ta set thin's straight.

"Of course not. I just thought…I thought that if you were…"

"It's okay, Pete, Ah understand. Ya guys were really close friends." If it was anybody but Piotr, they would have been crying their eyes out by now but he remained like a stone. A corner of mah mouth lifted up inta a smile an' he began to look less taken back as Ah turned ta leave 'gain.

Five days had passed since graduation an' Ah was finally goin' ta leave. Ah'd packed up a few clothes an' put 'em inta a small bag that Ah was carryin' with meh on mah bike. The rest Ah'd put inta boxes ta be put away. "Luv, what are you doing?"

"Packing."

"Then just leave what you don't need in the dressers. Less unpacking later."

"Someone else might need the space in the meantime." She looked at me with tears in her eyes.

"I can't believe you're really doing this, luv." She threw her arms 'round meh in an awkward hug.

"Bets, ya startin' ta act like Kitty. Speakin' of the devil…" Kitty phased threw the door an' seein' the emotional moment decided ta join in makin' it an official group hug. "If ya two don't mind, I'd like ta breath again."

"Yeah, like okay." Kitty stepped back and I could clearly see that she was crying as well. ~What am Ah gonna do with these two?~ "You'll like write won't you?"

"Yeah, sure once Ah find some place ta hang for awhile." She nodded slowly as we walked down the hall tawards the garage. ~The sooner Ah leave, the better. Ah suck at goodbyes.~

Ah passed Ororo an' Hank an' they ta looked ta be in rough shape. Ororo threw her arms 'round meh then as she cried silently. "Goodbye, Child. Come back soon." Ah didn't know what ta say as she let meh go an' Beast took mah hand an' started ta shake it before pullin' meh inta another hug.

"And the prodigal daughter shall return someday as well."

"Ya tryin' ta tell meh Ah'm gonna screw up out there?" Ah tried ta give mah voice a light an' laughin' tone but Ah failed miserably.

"No, of course not." Jamie came flyin' 'round the corner an' slid causin' him ta fall inta the wall. Ah received another group hug as six Jamies attacked meh at once. He pulled himself back tagether, literally.

"Roguey, please don't go."

"Ah gotta."

"No, you can stay here with us, with the X-Men." Ah mussed up his hair an' looked down at him. He was cryin' ta an' for some reason his tears seemed ta hurt the most.

"Ah'll miss ya Jamie, but this is somethin' Ah gotta do for mahself." He nodded slowly as he pressed somethin' inta mah hand.

"I know how much you like getting letters, so I wrote you one to read once you're gone." Ah gave him a faint smile realizin' for once that leavin' meant no more letters from Remy as well.

"Thanks." Ah finally got away ta the garage only ta find Logan checkin' the guages on mah bike. "Tryin' ta sabotage it so Ah can't leave?"

"No, making sure that it's in decent shape, so you don't get hurt, Kid." Ah bit mah lip ta keep from cryin' mahself. ~Ah've been doin' so good, don't start now.~

"Thanks, Wolvie. Um…well, I guess I'll see ya 'round." He pulled meh inta a bone crunchin' hug as well but for once Ah didn't make some comment 'bout not bein' able ta breath.

"Take care, Darlin'." The last word hit mah system like an atomic bomb. ~Darlin'? What's up with that?~

"Ya feelin' okay?" He stepped back an' Ah could see that the man Ah'd always assumed ta be ta tough ta cry was very close ta breakin' down.

"Just be careful." He turned an' walked away without another word. Ah swallowed an' blinked back the tears as Ah picked up mah bike helmet an' secured mah bag ta the back of the bike. *Bamf!

"Meine Shweister, ja be careful." Ah turned ta find Kurt in his finest bluest glory.

"Don't worry, Ah will." Ah winced as he hugged meh as well realizin' that mah ribs were surely bruised nicely by then.

"Ve'll…I'll miss ja."

"Ah will ta. Ya a great brother."

"I told meine self I vouldn't cry." He was balling his eyes out anyway. "Ja coming back zough?"

"Ah guess, eventually."

"Can eventually be soon?"

"Maybe…" Ah didn't want ta commit ta an early return then decide that it would be a year or more. It would kill 'em all if Ah broke that kind of a promise.

"Goodbye." *Bamf! Ah bit mah lip as he disappeared 'gain. ~Well, Ah think that was the last of 'em.~ Ah got onta the back of the bike an' kicked it inta gear. Ah tore outta the garage an' glanced over mah shoulder one last time at the institute ta see everyone out on the front steps wavin' goodbye ta meh. Ah bit mah lip so hard that Ah could taste the blood as Ah tore out through the gate an' away from everythin' that Ah'd known.

GAMBIT

It had been almost three weeks since I'd last gotten a letter from Marie. I was beginning t' worry dat she'd decided t' quit writing, but dere was also de fear dat Apocalypse had come back and had hurt her in some way. Each day I spent waiting on de porch f' de mailman t' come wit' de day's mail. I began t' carry mon sketch book outside wit' me t' pass de time and found myself sketching more of Marie den of de landscape 'round me dat I'd told myself I was going t'.

I looked up at de mailman as he came and put de mail int' de box and den scurried along on his way. ~De homme's mad if he t'inks I'm gonna kill him. If I do dat, den I'll never get anot'er letter.~ I briskly walked down de pat' and opened de mailbox t' find a box addressed t' me. ~Dat's strange. Wasn't expecting a package.~

I tore the brown paper away and opened it t' find anot'er letter and two CDs inside. I looked at de mailing date t' see it had been sent Friday, five days earlier. ~Merde, de postal system takes t' damn long t' deliver a package.~ I quickly read de letter and felt mon heart plummet t'rough de ground as I read her plans t' leave de institute. ~Maybe I'm not t' late.~ I ran inside and grabbed up de phone and hurriedly punched in de number f' de institute not caring who picked up on de ot'er end. ~Go ahead, Logan I dare y' t' pick up and hang up on me. Just tell me she's still dere and dat she was just having some silly teenage dream of running away from home before y' do t'ough.~

* Hello, Xavier Institute for Gifted Youngsters. Emma Frost speaking. *

* Emma, is Chére dere? *

* No, I'm afraid not. She left just this morning, Gambit. * ~Mon Dieu, I'm t' late!~

* When is she gonna get back? *

* We don't know. * Her voice sounded pained as she talked t' me. * Hold on a minute, Betsy wants to talk to you. *

* Hullo, luv. *

* Betsy, where is she? *

* Nice to talk to you too. None of us know. You missed her by like three hours. *

* Damn de postal system. * I realized what I'd said a li'l t' late.

* What are you talking about, Remy? *

* Not'ing. * I heard her laugh on de ot'er end. * Y' shouldn't laugh at a pissy Cajun. *

* I'm sorry, luv, but it just hit me as to what she's been writing so much. You've been pen-paling! *

* Maybe…y' ain't gonna tell Wolvie dat are y'? *

* Of course not, but it just makes sense now. She must be on her way to see you. *

* Non, Remy don't t'ink so. *

* Of course she is! Where else would she go without wanting to tell anyone? *

* Remy don' know, but he doubts it's N' Awlins. *

* Jamie not now…* I heard her talking t' someone but her hand must have been over de phone 'cause de conversation was muffled. * Hold on Remy, you seem to be Mr. Popular tonight. *

* Hey Remy! *

* Petite homme, what are y' doing? *

* I think Roguey's on her way to see you. *

* And Remy's telling y' she ain't. *

* Didn't you tell her not to wait though? I think she's coming to see you so she doesn't have to wait anymore. *

* Homme, have y' been in Rogue's room wit'out her permission? *

* Maybe…promise not to be mad? *

I sighed. * Oui, Remy promises. *

* I found the letters you sent Roguey and…and I read them too. *

* Y' did what?!?! *

* You promised. * I grumbled at being so stupid as t' let de kid off but listened as he continued. * I wrote Roguey a note telling her she should send me a postcard from New Orleans when she gets there. And I think she'll be there. I really do. *

* What makes y' so sure, homme? *

* I just have a gut feeling. *

* Y' sound more like Wolvie. Y' sure Remy be talking t' li'l Jamie? *

* I'm not that little! *

* Course not, homme. *

* Speaking of…you know who…I better get going. *

* T'anks homme. *

* Uh huh…no we don't need a new vacuum cleaner. Good luck, though. * I heard de ot'er line hang up and grinned. ~De kid's smart, t' smart f' his own good. Still, even as sure as he was, I'm not so sure dat Rogue's on her way here.~

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Another long chapter. Whew…that was exhilarating. Almost did that all in one sitting. 4,750 words! Yikes!

Rogue4787: Yeah, they're both getting too soft for my personal taste, at least for now. So I hope you'll be okay if I start having them slam each other next chapter.

Pomegranate Queen: You are way to close to what I have in mind! I don't like it, are you a telepath? I don't like telepaths, well excluding Betsy, so tell it to me straight. I hate Jean too. Can you tell she acts like such a bitch in my stories.

Lupine Draconis: You do that…I'm like Santa Claus I know who's been good and who's been naughty.

Ishandahalf: I am the 'bunny on crack' 4750 words in almost one sitting come on there's no one better than me!