Rockin On
A Final Fantasy Humour Fic
Disclaimer: MAKE IT UP!!!! DO I REALLY CARE ANYMORE? NO!!! Me don't own Liptons Ice Tea either.....
Sorry about that *necks pills from purple bottle* aaaaaahhhhhh......
*********************************************************************** Chapter 10: The Morning After The Night Before......Which Generally Involves Lacey Underwear........
The Setting: Balamb Garden, October 29th, 2003, about precisely 9ish.....
The Cast: The Band, Distorted Minds
The eye of perspective shifts, swooping gracefully down through the hallways and corridors of Garden, strewn with empty beer bottles, purple feathers, inflatable bananas, and the other associated paraphanalia of a good night out....
The only mortal...er...actually...immortal being awake on this fine, if slightly chilly, November morn was Death, stalking around in his customary fashion, wiping up the empty glasses and collecting the beer bottles, lobbing them absent-mindedly over his shoulder, hitting the bin every time.....
Death: *materialises a computer station, strewn with empty Liptons Ice Tea bottles and half finished crackers, with KOV sitting behind it, cackling evilly and typing rather randomly* THEE, SIRRAH, ART PUTTING DOTS AT THE END OF THY STATEMENTS AGAIN....
KOV: *jumps in shock* what the.....I'm in Garden?......Hey!!......*clunk* *head hits keyboard*
Death: AHH.....ERM.....HELLO?....ER......AH, TA HELL WI' ET! *biffs KOV on the bonce with scythe handle*
KOV: *snore*
Death: THIS DUDE IS RANDOM...ER....RIGHT........BASS PIPE TIME!
Death strolls up to the church organ, still on stage after the heady reveries of last night, and selects the most eardrum-damaging combination of stops and pedals he can think of, with added Vox Humana, just for the un- easy reverberation value.
KOV: *wakes up* *holds hands over ears* eeeeeeerrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhhh........
Meanwhile, in another part of the Garden, Seifer wakes up, bright, refreshed, and in a generally good mood until he realises that Dr Kadowki was next to him.
Seifer: errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......i knew i was ratarsed, but not THAT ratarsed.....ah ta hell wi' 'et.....*goes and takes a shower*
*******
After many minutes of pleading, begging, and threatening, the gang reconvene in the cafeteria for a good fry-up.
DAY: *sleepy* whhyyyy....are....we...up...this....early....
Selphie: Whyevernot?
KOV: Selphie.....
Selphie: YeahaMrAuthorMan?
KOV: *pauses for a moment*.....SHUT THE HELL UP!!! YOU MAD...OVERLY PERKY....LUNATIC!
Selphie: *bursts into tears*
Irvine: Hey, that was mean man!
Squall: yeah, whatever....
Quistis: *lying on table* yeah...man....
KOV: Don't start that again. Anyway, i had good reason. i mean, who is taht perky first thing in morno?
Squall: Erm..whatever....it's not actually first thing in the morno....whatever....it's 10:30
KOV: WELL IT DAMN WELL FEELS LIKE IT!
Selphie: *stops crying when she realises no-one cares* blasphemyisnaughty....
KOV: oh fine then.....*sits down and starts hitting his head against the table leg*
Quistis: *still on table* so can anyone remember anything?
Squall: Er, i can remember...oh no, i'd rather not remember that actually, watever....
Irvine: Oh, that...
Squall: Yeah, that....
Irvine: I don't think i'm ever gonna be able to forget that, tho i'm gonna give it a damn fine go.....
DAY: what are you talking about?
Squall+Irvine: *unison* Don't Ask!
Quistis: There were a great many women throwing their underwear on stage....
Death: INDEED.....
Everyone (see, note clever non-use of all): *stare at Death in suspicious fashion*
Death: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT....YOU CADS....
KOV: I reckon we oughta go and get some hangover cures inside of us.
KOV: Damn, you again! *stands up* Who are you, punk!
KOV: I ain't no punk, take that heathen comment back!
KOV: Make me, beatch!
KOV: *starts fighting with KOV*
Edward: *grabs bullrush again* and it's a thrilling start to the latest KOV v KOV bout....
Quisty: *sees Edward* It talked, it talked! Come 'ere, you rodent you!
Edward: Erk...quick departure time! *runs off*
KOV: haha, thou canst not resist the ultimate spell of the Crusty Bread Roll of doom!!!
KOV: *unleashes the pink bunnies again, with DAY's consent*
KOV: noooooooo *passes out*
PBOUD: *start eating KOV's trousers*
*********************************************************************** And on that note, let us bring this randomness to an end. Read, review, please, if you really feel like it....
Knight Of Valhala
Disclaimer: MAKE IT UP!!!! DO I REALLY CARE ANYMORE? NO!!! Me don't own Liptons Ice Tea either.....
Sorry about that *necks pills from purple bottle* aaaaaahhhhhh......
*********************************************************************** Chapter 10: The Morning After The Night Before......Which Generally Involves Lacey Underwear........
The Setting: Balamb Garden, October 29th, 2003, about precisely 9ish.....
The Cast: The Band, Distorted Minds
The eye of perspective shifts, swooping gracefully down through the hallways and corridors of Garden, strewn with empty beer bottles, purple feathers, inflatable bananas, and the other associated paraphanalia of a good night out....
The only mortal...er...actually...immortal being awake on this fine, if slightly chilly, November morn was Death, stalking around in his customary fashion, wiping up the empty glasses and collecting the beer bottles, lobbing them absent-mindedly over his shoulder, hitting the bin every time.....
Death: *materialises a computer station, strewn with empty Liptons Ice Tea bottles and half finished crackers, with KOV sitting behind it, cackling evilly and typing rather randomly* THEE, SIRRAH, ART PUTTING DOTS AT THE END OF THY STATEMENTS AGAIN....
KOV: *jumps in shock* what the.....I'm in Garden?......Hey!!......*clunk* *head hits keyboard*
Death: AHH.....ERM.....HELLO?....ER......AH, TA HELL WI' ET! *biffs KOV on the bonce with scythe handle*
KOV: *snore*
Death: THIS DUDE IS RANDOM...ER....RIGHT........BASS PIPE TIME!
Death strolls up to the church organ, still on stage after the heady reveries of last night, and selects the most eardrum-damaging combination of stops and pedals he can think of, with added Vox Humana, just for the un- easy reverberation value.
KOV: *wakes up* *holds hands over ears* eeeeeeerrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhhh........
Meanwhile, in another part of the Garden, Seifer wakes up, bright, refreshed, and in a generally good mood until he realises that Dr Kadowki was next to him.
Seifer: errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......i knew i was ratarsed, but not THAT ratarsed.....ah ta hell wi' 'et.....*goes and takes a shower*
*******
After many minutes of pleading, begging, and threatening, the gang reconvene in the cafeteria for a good fry-up.
DAY: *sleepy* whhyyyy....are....we...up...this....early....
Selphie: Whyevernot?
KOV: Selphie.....
Selphie: YeahaMrAuthorMan?
KOV: *pauses for a moment*.....SHUT THE HELL UP!!! YOU MAD...OVERLY PERKY....LUNATIC!
Selphie: *bursts into tears*
Irvine: Hey, that was mean man!
Squall: yeah, whatever....
Quistis: *lying on table* yeah...man....
KOV: Don't start that again. Anyway, i had good reason. i mean, who is taht perky first thing in morno?
Squall: Erm..whatever....it's not actually first thing in the morno....whatever....it's 10:30
KOV: WELL IT DAMN WELL FEELS LIKE IT!
Selphie: *stops crying when she realises no-one cares* blasphemyisnaughty....
KOV: oh fine then.....*sits down and starts hitting his head against the table leg*
Quistis: *still on table* so can anyone remember anything?
Squall: Er, i can remember...oh no, i'd rather not remember that actually, watever....
Irvine: Oh, that...
Squall: Yeah, that....
Irvine: I don't think i'm ever gonna be able to forget that, tho i'm gonna give it a damn fine go.....
DAY: what are you talking about?
Squall+Irvine: *unison* Don't Ask!
Quistis: There were a great many women throwing their underwear on stage....
Death: INDEED.....
Everyone (see, note clever non-use of all): *stare at Death in suspicious fashion*
Death: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT....YOU CADS....
KOV: I reckon we oughta go and get some hangover cures inside of us.
KOV: Damn, you again! *stands up* Who are you, punk!
KOV: I ain't no punk, take that heathen comment back!
KOV: Make me, beatch!
KOV: *starts fighting with KOV*
Edward: *grabs bullrush again* and it's a thrilling start to the latest KOV v KOV bout....
Quisty: *sees Edward* It talked, it talked! Come 'ere, you rodent you!
Edward: Erk...quick departure time! *runs off*
KOV: haha, thou canst not resist the ultimate spell of the Crusty Bread Roll of doom!!!
KOV: *unleashes the pink bunnies again, with DAY's consent*
KOV: noooooooo *passes out*
PBOUD: *start eating KOV's trousers*
*********************************************************************** And on that note, let us bring this randomness to an end. Read, review, please, if you really feel like it....
Knight Of Valhala