Note: Yokohama, a Japanese city, is famous for its good Chinese food.
It seemed that a wonderfully beautiful, and maybe even a bit scary of a romance was unfolding between Akito and I! It was one month later and I had already gone on several dates with Akito, though he didn't try to assault me with kisses while watching a political drama again. We went to another movie one time, and we went to bazaars, and little outside markets in Arabic neighborhoods, and ate Chinese in Yokohama, and once he even bought me a bouquet; it was wonderful! And I think Akito had fun too, though he didn't express it much. But I guess he does enjoy it, because he still calls me. Life was truly wonderful!
But, as the days passed, one fact became shockingly clear to me. Well, actually when I think about it, it isn't that shocking, but, Akito had never told me he loved me. I had many times without thinking twice, knowing it was a good thing to do, but Akito had never said anything of the like in return. Akito had never said, "Tohru-kun, I love you." And to me, it was a little surprising. We had both accepted that things were different between us for the better, and were dating, but he had still never told me. At first I didn't think too much of it, Akito was never the type to say "I love you" to anyone, but as time progressed, it became more and more apparent to me. And after I realized this, I soon began to feel very lonely when I said those words to him and he never replied. I became increasingly aware of the seeming hole in the conversation of his absence of the three words he always failed to say. I guess I knew he loved me as well, but I just needed to hear it. I had kept this to myself until lately. I had been saying "I love you" more and more often, in some subconscious futile attempt that I might hear those magical words spoken to me one day.
~~~~~~~~~~
So, one day, after a short date, at his house, I told Akito I loved him again for the third time that date. As expected, an unnerving silence followed, that I had become very immune to by now. Holding my breath and taking my chances, I repeated what I had just said.
"Akito, I love you." Silence. I was begging for Akito to say something and break the silence before I suffocated. I heard Akito exhale out his nose and I sensed faint discomfort from him. I finally gave up and exhaled and took another breath. "I love you, Akito," I repeated, this time a bit more bravely. There was a pause where neither one of us said anything. I took another breath. "Akito, I love you. I love you. Can't you see that? I love you. Why don't you react? Why do I always feel like I'm talking to myself? Akito, I think that you do love me, so could you just show me, once?" I said. I was expecting this to be a long ordeal of some sort, and I thought it would take some persuading to get Akito to open up to me- well, not that much.
"I've tried."
"And Akito, I- Huh?"
"I've tried to tell you my feelings. I've tried to tell you that the main reason I get up in the morning is because I know I can hope I can see you that day. I've tried to tell you that there are some days I can't stop thinking about you no matter what I do. I've tried...I've tried to tell you that I love you, but I just couldn't. I held back because, I just couldn't find the time. I couldn't say it as easily as you could, just 'I love you'. So, I'm sorry."
"Oh..." There was a pause between us for a moment.
"Tohru Honda, I've wanted to tell you, I love you." He had said it, he had finally said it. I felt tears rim my eyes as I stepped forward and embraced him in my arms and leaned my head against his chest. And for the first time I felt his arms wrap around my body protectively as well. I froze this moment in time in my memory forever so that I would never ever lose it. I smiled into the warmth of his shirt.
"We've come so far," I whispered. "When...when you were sick, everyone...everyone was sure you were going to die. Your situation seemed very hopeless, but then, somehow, you recovered. And suddenly, your situation became very, very hopeful and I wish I knew how it happened. Maybe...maybe there is someone or something watching out for us, that cared enough to save you, Akito. Maybe we're not entirely alone and unguided," I said. "From hopeless to hopeful," I whispered with a smile. Never before had I felt such a peace of mind, such a contentment.
Mom, you were watching over Akito for me, weren't you? Thank you. Thank you for saving one of the most important people to me. You've been watching over both of us.
"Tohru, you've saved me. It was you who gave me the will to live, the will to continue. And that's what helped me to live, the prayers of everyone. You weren't too late to save me after all."
Mom, I know now that whatever may come, I can handle it. I can live and continue through any manner of pain and heartache, because I've been saved once from it. Akito is alive, he's present, so I don't have to hide from it anymore. I can face forward now, with Akito. I know now, that whatever misfortunes befall me, I can continue, I have to keep going. I love you, Mom.
"I love you so much, Akito," I whispered. Akito pulled away gently and kissed me gently.
"I love you too, Tohru Honda, my saviour. I've been saved. I love you," Akito said. He pulled me into his embrace again and touched my head and leaned his head on my hair.
"I love you," I whispered the final time as I closed my eyes. Everything was going to be okay. This has definitely taught me that anything can go from hopeless to hopeful. Anything at all, even the most seeemingly hopeless things;anything can be saved and improved for the better. I know it for sure.
From Hopeless to Hopeful
The End
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Whew! The end! I posted this story on August 15, 2003, and now, on November 24, 2003 I've finished it, complete at ten chapters. I really enjoyed writing this story, and I think it shows some rare writing talent of mine; I think this is one of my best works yet. Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing.
Okay, I don't have anyone to dedicate this to, though I wish I did. So, think of someone that you know, that you really appreciate, and this is dedicated to them.
It seemed that a wonderfully beautiful, and maybe even a bit scary of a romance was unfolding between Akito and I! It was one month later and I had already gone on several dates with Akito, though he didn't try to assault me with kisses while watching a political drama again. We went to another movie one time, and we went to bazaars, and little outside markets in Arabic neighborhoods, and ate Chinese in Yokohama, and once he even bought me a bouquet; it was wonderful! And I think Akito had fun too, though he didn't express it much. But I guess he does enjoy it, because he still calls me. Life was truly wonderful!
But, as the days passed, one fact became shockingly clear to me. Well, actually when I think about it, it isn't that shocking, but, Akito had never told me he loved me. I had many times without thinking twice, knowing it was a good thing to do, but Akito had never said anything of the like in return. Akito had never said, "Tohru-kun, I love you." And to me, it was a little surprising. We had both accepted that things were different between us for the better, and were dating, but he had still never told me. At first I didn't think too much of it, Akito was never the type to say "I love you" to anyone, but as time progressed, it became more and more apparent to me. And after I realized this, I soon began to feel very lonely when I said those words to him and he never replied. I became increasingly aware of the seeming hole in the conversation of his absence of the three words he always failed to say. I guess I knew he loved me as well, but I just needed to hear it. I had kept this to myself until lately. I had been saying "I love you" more and more often, in some subconscious futile attempt that I might hear those magical words spoken to me one day.
~~~~~~~~~~
So, one day, after a short date, at his house, I told Akito I loved him again for the third time that date. As expected, an unnerving silence followed, that I had become very immune to by now. Holding my breath and taking my chances, I repeated what I had just said.
"Akito, I love you." Silence. I was begging for Akito to say something and break the silence before I suffocated. I heard Akito exhale out his nose and I sensed faint discomfort from him. I finally gave up and exhaled and took another breath. "I love you, Akito," I repeated, this time a bit more bravely. There was a pause where neither one of us said anything. I took another breath. "Akito, I love you. I love you. Can't you see that? I love you. Why don't you react? Why do I always feel like I'm talking to myself? Akito, I think that you do love me, so could you just show me, once?" I said. I was expecting this to be a long ordeal of some sort, and I thought it would take some persuading to get Akito to open up to me- well, not that much.
"I've tried."
"And Akito, I- Huh?"
"I've tried to tell you my feelings. I've tried to tell you that the main reason I get up in the morning is because I know I can hope I can see you that day. I've tried to tell you that there are some days I can't stop thinking about you no matter what I do. I've tried...I've tried to tell you that I love you, but I just couldn't. I held back because, I just couldn't find the time. I couldn't say it as easily as you could, just 'I love you'. So, I'm sorry."
"Oh..." There was a pause between us for a moment.
"Tohru Honda, I've wanted to tell you, I love you." He had said it, he had finally said it. I felt tears rim my eyes as I stepped forward and embraced him in my arms and leaned my head against his chest. And for the first time I felt his arms wrap around my body protectively as well. I froze this moment in time in my memory forever so that I would never ever lose it. I smiled into the warmth of his shirt.
"We've come so far," I whispered. "When...when you were sick, everyone...everyone was sure you were going to die. Your situation seemed very hopeless, but then, somehow, you recovered. And suddenly, your situation became very, very hopeful and I wish I knew how it happened. Maybe...maybe there is someone or something watching out for us, that cared enough to save you, Akito. Maybe we're not entirely alone and unguided," I said. "From hopeless to hopeful," I whispered with a smile. Never before had I felt such a peace of mind, such a contentment.
Mom, you were watching over Akito for me, weren't you? Thank you. Thank you for saving one of the most important people to me. You've been watching over both of us.
"Tohru, you've saved me. It was you who gave me the will to live, the will to continue. And that's what helped me to live, the prayers of everyone. You weren't too late to save me after all."
Mom, I know now that whatever may come, I can handle it. I can live and continue through any manner of pain and heartache, because I've been saved once from it. Akito is alive, he's present, so I don't have to hide from it anymore. I can face forward now, with Akito. I know now, that whatever misfortunes befall me, I can continue, I have to keep going. I love you, Mom.
"I love you so much, Akito," I whispered. Akito pulled away gently and kissed me gently.
"I love you too, Tohru Honda, my saviour. I've been saved. I love you," Akito said. He pulled me into his embrace again and touched my head and leaned his head on my hair.
"I love you," I whispered the final time as I closed my eyes. Everything was going to be okay. This has definitely taught me that anything can go from hopeless to hopeful. Anything at all, even the most seeemingly hopeless things;anything can be saved and improved for the better. I know it for sure.
From Hopeless to Hopeful
The End
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Whew! The end! I posted this story on August 15, 2003, and now, on November 24, 2003 I've finished it, complete at ten chapters. I really enjoyed writing this story, and I think it shows some rare writing talent of mine; I think this is one of my best works yet. Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing.
Okay, I don't have anyone to dedicate this to, though I wish I did. So, think of someone that you know, that you really appreciate, and this is dedicated to them.