Warning: Yes, another warning. This is where the story goes nuts! I am kind of planning on putting some readers in this fic, so if I put you in here and you get offended, remember one thing...you asked for it!

Disclaimer: No, these characters are not mine. Okay, Ashley Benlove in this chapter sort of is. She is based on a reviewer! I hope I did her justice!

Here we go...

The Wizard Protection Program

Pairings: Harry/Ashley, Ron/not telling, Hermione/not telling, Draco/not telling, Snape/not telling

Rating: PG

Chapter: Urinals and Bicycles

Harry looked around at his cramped flat. 'It's called an apartment,' he reminded himself. It was small and drab, his apartment. He was, after all, the janitor at River Valley Elementary School in Sunnydale, Texas.

He sat down on the old rotting sofa and took out his notebook and pencil. He was uncomfertable with his new writing utensils, but there was no way he would look normal whipping out a quill and roll of parchment in front of the Muggles. He looked over at the snow white poodle in the corner with a screwed-up look on her face.

"I know how you feel, Hedwig," he sighed. Sure, his situation was not great, but he wasn't stuck as a poodle until God knows when. The poor bird may not fly again for a few years. Harry had sacrifices, too. He may not drink a butterbeer again or see Remus again. Both of them were trapped in by the four grimy walls of Harry's new apartment.

Harry looked down at the notebook and began a letter.

"Dear Ron,

How are you? I don't know anything about where you are or who you are now. Minister McNally said to send all letters through him until we are better informed.

I am now Karl Stephan. I am a janitor at River Valley Elementary School. I am 18 years old (duh) and have a whole new look. I have blonde short hair and blue eyes now. I am not too sure on what a janitor does, but I have work tomorrow and will get all the details then. I am guessing it's a crummy job because my flat is a dump.

My address is attached, please mail me soon. I miss you-"

He had hesitated, thinking of writing "and Hermione, too," but thought better of it. He signed the letter with his new name and wrote a very similar letter to Hermione. He had not mentioned Ron to her. He didn't want to upset her. He then walked the letters, addressed to Minister McNally (well, it said Mr. McNally on the envelope), to the mailbox on the first floor of the apartment building.

When Harry got back, he settled into his bed with Hedwig lying by his feet. It was going to be a long...well, however long he would be there, it would be long.

~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~

Well, Harry surely knew that Voldemort wouldn't think to look for him cleaning urinals at an elementary school in America. He was greatful he was safe, but he was certain that he could handle Voldemort. He was supposed to kill him, wasn't he? He couldn't believe Dumbledore was making him do this!

"Bastard," Harry whispered as he wheeled his cleaning cart down the hall to the next bathroom.

"Actually, my parents were married," came a sweet voice from his left. Harry turned to see the most beautiful girl he had ever laid eyes on. Her twinkling brown eyes and wonderful curly brown hair were so lovely. She was about 5'3", the perfect height for him, as he was an inch short of six feet. She was an absolute model of a Mary Sue, and he loved her.

"Oh, Miss..." he stammered. 'What a moron I am, cussing in an elementary school,' he thought to himself. 'She probably hates me.'

"Benlove. Ashley Benlove," she finished. She looked at him and took in his blond hair and blue eyes. They for some readon looked out of place, but she couldn't understand why. She still found him handsome, though.

"It's a pleasure to meet you. My name's Karl Stephan. I'm the janitor. I apologize for my cussing, I was deep in thought," Harry returned, hoping beyond hope that she forgave him. He didn't think he would be able to handle himself if she didn't.

She thought for a moment, then replied, "I forgive you, but I want something in return."

Harry thought that it could be his lucky day. This beautiful girl wanted a favor. He just stood there, then remembered she was waiting for a response from him, and nodded. "Sure," he managed.

"Can I have a ride home? I usually walk, but I pulled a muscle in my leg today and-" she started, but Harry cut her off.

"Say no more,. Do you mind riding on my handlebars? I only have a bike," he said, all of the sudden feeling dumb that he didn't have a big, cool acar to take her home on.

She smiled at him and said, "Sure! Meet you out front at 3:45." Then, she turned and headed back into her classroom.

Harry spent the afternoon on cloud nine, despite the fact that he had to clean up after a kid who got sick in the cafeteria.

He met Ashley outside of the school and drove her home, which was three blocks away from the school. When he got home, he told Hedwig all about it and started getting excited about Friday, when he was taking her out to dinner.

A/N: Hey, I got a few requests and stuff, and I will try to honor them all, but I don't know if I can. I have pairings made for everyone that requested being it the story but one person. Also, unless you want a very small part, you can't be in this fic anymore, all major roles are filled. Notes to my reviewers:

Lisa-Chan~ I am so glad you like the story! I think it's going to turn out great. Aren't the last names great? I hope you like the characters "new names"!

RowlingFan1: I am planning on putting you in, but I have a question or two first that could effect the whole plot, so expect an e-mail.

Aranami~ I have a spot for you, and even the knife thing is probably going to be worked in eventually!

Vanyaria Darkshadow~ I want to put you in, and yes, there will be several love stories, but I don't know if I will get you worked into one. You see, someone else is alread going to meet Snape and date him. You could be his friend, and depending on what Rowlingfan1 says, you may even get to have another romantic interest. How about I e-mail you?

Thanks everyone, and also, if you guys have ever thought being a Hogwarts student might be fun, you should join this great site. The URL is: http://hsm.proboards15.com/index.cgi and it's really cool. You can be a student or teacher. Terms are 9 weeks long, but if you hate it, you can drop out. It is comprised of all message boards, and there are areas for all classrooms, common rooms, house tables, sorting hat, library, Diagon Alley shops, teacher's offices, Quidditch Pitch, Gringotts, and much more. Check it out as a guest. It's really great! And if you have questions, e-mail me!

~CrazySwimmer27