Disclaimer: Although I would most certainly enjoy it, I do not, in any way, own Harry Potter. Phooey.
The Power of Speech
By Ronandchicken
As long as our hearts beat
As long as the earth spins
As
long as the sun burns
Let
us remain together
Here
forever
Never
to be taken away...
The words blew along with the wind, and only
those who knew how to listen could hear them. If you cocked your ear just right, if
you stood in the breeze and were silent long enough, you would hear. But you also had to want, to need, to long, to feel the strong connection,
the immense power of love.
~~~
Harry stood outside of Hogwarts. This
was the first time he had not quite wanted to return. It held so many good
memories... and just as many terrible. A breeze ruffled his cloak about him. He
longed for Sirius to be back with him. It had been months since the man had
died, but Harry still grieved for his godfather, was still plagued by
nightmares reminding him of his foolish mistake: believing Voldemort, falling
prey to Voldemort, and, as Dumbledore said, acting just as Voldemort expects those 'fools
who love' to act. The words of the poem blew across the wind to him, sensing his feeling
of loss, of confusion, with nowhere to turn. But
through his tears, his quiet sobs, he did not hear them.
~~~~
"Harry?" asked Hermione as
he slowly walked into the Common Room. He took with him a sense of gloom, a sense of
a rock, without emotion. It felt cold. Harry was closing his openings
to the outside world.
He looked at her without speaking. He had written to Hermione and Ron, but when they saw each other, not uttered a word. Nothing. In class, he never practiced the spell, but when everyone had to do it for the professor, he always had it right.
"How are you?"
He stared, and then nodded. It was solemn, sober. He didn't shrug. That gave an impression of giving up to his feelings. He was stern with them. He would remain in control this year.
"Why won't you talk to us Harry?" she asked desperately, as she had so many times over the summer.
No reaction. He just stared at her, but with his eyes out of focus, as if he were seeing something other than her face. She watched him to see if she could read his emotions, but with no success.
"We know you're hurt on the inside,
Harry. No point in hiding it."
His eyes snapped into
focus and met hers. She started slightly. The expression in his eyes was most
frightening. It was anger, grief, loss, shame, guilt, restlessness, and a score
of other things all in one, but one emotion shining out among the rest: fear.
He turned
and ran up the boys' staircase, looking over his shoulder to give her a
fleeting look.
He knew that people
could tell. But talking to anyone roused the emotions,
and he didn't want that. Not when he worked tirelessly
through the night and day to push the feelings away. He couldn't be around people much anymore. He couldn't talk. Then he would think of what to say, and
feelings would come back. He had to become emotionless. If I never loved, I
never would have cried, he
thought, after changing into his pajamas and rolling into bed. I can't love anymore. He dozed into a
fitful sleep.
~~~
In his dream, he was sitting in
Dudley's second bedroom at the Dursely's. It had taken him a few
moments to realize he was crying into his hands. Sirius walked up to him from the window, as
if a ghost were coming in on the breeze.
Don't stop living became I am gone, he said, putting an arm around Harry's shoulder. James and Lily would not have wanted you to slop living for them, and I don't want you to stop feeling for me.
'But if I bother to care' dream-Harry said, voice hoarse from remaining silent for so long, 'then I risk loss. If I bother to love, I lose. How can I feel again, when I am scared of feeling? Live again when scared of living?''
Do not be afraid. We are always here.
As long as our hearts beat
As long as the earth spins
As long as the sun burns
Let us remain together
Here
forever
Never to be taken away...
And with that, Sirius faded back into the wind.
'No!' dream-Harry cried, struggling out of bed and over to the window. 'Don't leave me again! Please! No! Don't go!' And he slowly woke up to find himself yelling those words aloud. A figure was standing in the dormitory door, watching, as though he didn't realize Harry was awake yet. It was still very early in the evening, as a hint of light still remained in the western part of the sky, and the buzz from the Common Room below was still loud.
Harry began to get up, and the figure gave a small gasp and ran down, calling to Hermione. Harry figured it was probably Ron, who Hermione had sent to come check on Harry. How much had he muttered? But before worrying about it too much, and risking setting off many more dangerous emotions, Harry rolled over and forced himself to sleep again. Whatever dreams he had after, he forgot completely.
~~~
A/N: So what do you think? It is certainly not finished, so don't get any
ideas. I want to see what you guys think of the plot.