by Yuki
Disclaimer: Inuyasha is the property of Rumiko-sama...Not Viz. I refuse to accept that the evil known as Viz has any sanction over this wonderful series.
Chapter 3: How Inuyasha came to love fudge.
There was a quiet rustle in the woods as two demon brothers poked their heads
out from a bush and looked around.
"So you say it's around here somewhere?" Inuyasha asked his brother
in a whisper.
"I've said that twenty times you moron..." his brother growled. "Are
you dumb or just plain stupid?"
"I'll give you stupid!!" Inuyasha grabbed Sesshoumaru by the neck
and began to strangle him.
Which....was very stupid.
No HURT Sesshoumaru!!!
A large fireball erupted out of nowhere, engulfing Inuyasha in flames, burning
him to a crisp, yet missing lovely Sesshoumaru entirely. With a small puff of
smoke, the charred half-demon fell to the ground twitching.
I told you not to hurt him baka!!
"Biiii....tccchhh....." Inuyasha managed to gasp out as he lay smoldering
on the ground. Sesshoumaru looked rather smug in a cute way and smirked at his
brother.
"Shall we go now brother-dear?" he asked in a very condescending voice.
Making sure to step on him on his way out, Sesshoumaru left the bushes. Inuyasha
gave a growl and shook off the ashes, following him.
......................
I said....Inuyasha gave a growl and shook off the ashes, following him.
....................
That's your cue Inuyasha...
"I think you killed him..." Sesshoumaru poked his head back into the
bushes and poked his brother's crispy corpse. "Good going."
HEY! It was an accident! He was going to hurt you!
"Well it seems like we won't be having that problem anymore..." Sesshoumaru
picked up his arm to check his pulse and was moderately surprised to see it
crumble into ashes. "Damn woman, you did a job on him"
I said I didn't mean to!!!
Kyyyyaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There was a scream. WAIT! What do I mean there was a scream?!? There's not supposed
to be a scream now!! Who's that?!?!
"Kyaaaaaa!!!! Inuyasha!" a girl in a green and white sailor fuku came
running through the bushes.
"Inuyasha!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!"
Kagome! What are you doing here?!?!?
"Kagome?" Sesshoumaru looked at the girl who was now kneeling beside
Inuyasha and crying a lot.
"Oi....Correct me if I'm wrong...which I rarely am...but that's not Kagome..."
Of course it's not! It's an imposter! She's not the REAL Kagome.
"Inuyasha!!!! He's DEAD!!!!" the girl cried some more and looked a
little pathetic.
Oh please, get over it.
"You killed him Yuki-chan!" she screamed at the narrator who was really
quite innocent of the whole ordeal. In fact, everyone should thank her. With
Inuyasha gone, the series can further explore the wonders of Sesshoumaru.
"Why...that's a good point!" Sesshoumaru beamed happily at the idea
of the story revolving around him. "I do believe I would make a very good
main character!"
You would! My little Sesshou-chan would be the most popular bishounen EVER!
"I would!"
You Would!
"I would!"
You DEFINATLY Would!!!
"SHUT UP!!" Kagome screamed causing both Sesshoumaru and the lovely
narrator to stop short. "Yuki-chan you knew Inuyasha was mine!"
Really? I was unaware of that actually.
"Baka....don't play that..." The girl pulled out an official "Inuyasha
no Tsuma" card.
Oh...that...ahem...Well...I'm sure he'll be fine in the morning.....
Sesshoumaru and Kagome both gave the narrator a flat stare. With his taloned
finger, Sesshoumaru poked his brother's blackened chest, causing the entire
body to crumble into ashes.
"Fine in the morning huh?" Sesshoumaru said flatly, obviously forgetting
that he had been happy about it a moment before, which makes one believe that
perhaps Inuyasha hadn't gotten all of the stupid genes.
"OI!" Sesshoumaru fumed "I'm not stupid!"
Feh, whatever.
"Yuki-chan..." Kagome decided to point something out besides the fact
that the real Kagome's fuku was extremely too small in the upper chest reason,
therefore creating a very big eyeful for Sesshoumaru who appeared to be taking
full advantage of the situation. Which didn't last long since, for no real reason
other than because the narrator tends to be jealous, a large branch feel out
of a tree knocking Sesshoumaru out cold.
Damn...missed her....
"Yuki......" Kagome said somewhat annoyed, although the fact that
she had nearly been creamed by an overly jealous fan girl made her a tad nervous.
"I was about to point something out."
What?
"You just wrote yourself into a corner." She said with a mixture of
seriousness and amusement.
I what?
"A corner....think about it...you'll get it in a minute..."
............................
...........................
"Come on...you can do it.." she said with a smirk.
Shut up! ..........................Ahh shit!
"Get it now?"
............Yes..........dammit..........Hmmm.......
"But.....since this fic is anything BUT serious, it's easily resolved."
You're right! I can fix it no problem! Ahem....Suddenly a little angel fell
from the sky, his grey hair shining slightly.
"Kaworu-kun!" Kagome jumped up and down, giggling happily as the tiny
winged-version of Kaworu fluttered over Inuyasha's ashes, dropping a bunch of
fairy dust. With a wink and a smile, he disappeared.
Well...that was...interesting...
"Kaworu-kun!" Stars filled her eyes as she gazed where he had been,
not noticing that Inuyasha was completely healed and revived, although a little
peeved.
"What the FUCK is going on?!?!" Inuyasha sat up and rubbed the back
of his neck, looking around in confusion. Beside him, Sesshoumaru still lay
unconscious and a starry-eyed Kagome was on the other side.
"Wait...never mind...I don't wanna know..."
Ahah! He's alive! I kick ass!
"INUYASHA!" Apparently recovering from her momentary lapse of sanity,
Kagome glomped Inuyasha fiercely. "You're ALIVE!!! How do you feel??"
"ACK! Who are you?!?!?" he screamed, trying to escape the grasp of
the strange girl. "ACK! NOOO!!! A
RABID FANGIRL!! DAMN YOU!!!"
Hey, I didn't do it this time. She did it on her own.
"Sesshoumaru!! HELP HELP!!" Inuyasha clawed the ground furiously as
Kagome clung to his legs, snuggling him happily.
Umm he's out cold...But....I could be persuaded to wake him...
"ANYTHING!! Just get him to HELP ME!!" Inuyasha was desperately pushing
away the girl as she continued to cling to him, smiling happily.
Welll......ok....Ahem....Sesshoumaru awoke at the sound of his brother's screams
"Huh? What's going....ACK! Inuyasha!! There's something CLINGING to you!!"
Sesshoumaru pointed at the frantic dog demon with a shocked look on his face.
"I fucking KNOW that!" he screamed back. "HELP ME!!!!"
Sesshoumaru blinked and then a wicked smile crossed his lips. "Oh...so
you're asking ME for help now?
Kukuku Amusing..."
"Argggh!!! Don't DO this to me!!! We're BLOOD dammit!!" Inuyasha was
beginning to realize that he might not win this battle on his own. Which is
probably a good assumption, given the degree of Kagome's obsession.
"Feh......I don't know why I even do these things..." Sesshoumaru
grumbled to himself, not feeling like arguing about it and dragging this fic
out any longer than it had to be. With a snort, he stood up and grabbed his
brother's hands, pulling with all his might.
"NOOOOOO!!! Inuyasha! Noooo!! Don't LEAVE me!!" Kagome tightened her
grasp as she felt him being pulled away. The little game of tug-of-war lasted
for a few moments, but not even the raging strength of this rabid fan girl could
stand up to the maleficent strength of the powerful Sesshoumaru!
With loud FWOOSH sound, Kagome lost the war, and was thrown miles away by the
force of her own pulling, screaming as she went.
"Yuuuuuuuuukiiiiiiiiii............... annnnnnnttttaaaaaaaaa wwwaaaaaaaa
baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaakkkkkkkkaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Which didn't bother the narrator much since in the process of being tugged from
Kagome's grasp, Inuyasha had lost his pants, which provided everyone with a
very nice view of his lower portions.
"SHIT!" Inuyasha blushed furiously and pulled his upper shirt around
him tightly, concealing as much as he could.
Whohoo, shake it baby!
"SHUT UP!!!" Crouching on the ground to further conceal himself, Inuyasha's
face was a fierce shade of red, while his brother was chuckling softly. "Dammit...get
me some pants or something Sesshoumaru."
"From where!?! We're in the middle of nowhere!" Sesshoumaru snapped
at him for really no reason at all except that he looks cute when he's slightly
angry.
".............." Neither brother dignified that with a response.
"So....Inuyasha..How do you feel?" Sesshoumaru asked out of sheer
boredom rather than actual concern.
Although we can't understand how he could be bored with all that just happened.
"Feh...I feel fine..." he said with a grumble, apparently still upset
over the pants thing. "Except..."
"Except what?" Sesshoumaru asked with a slightly bit more interest.
Which also made him look very very cute.
"I have this overwhelming urge......to....to..."Inuyasha looked up
into Sesshoumaru's eyes. "To...kiss you.."
WHOHOOOO!!!!!
"WHAT?!!?!" Sesshoumaru leapt back, shock covering his face. "BITCH!
What did you do to him?!?!"
ME??? I didn't do anything!!!
"AHHH!!" Inuyasha slapped his own face a few times. "What DID
you do?!?! Why am I thinking about kissing my brother?!?!"
Oh wait....
"What?? What??" Sesshoumaru asked frantically. "What is it??"
Well maybe...umm maybe I shouldn't have had Kaworu revive him... we all know
he's a little light in the loafers himself.
"HUH???" both Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru gasped at the same time.
"You're telling me, that because of the little fairy-angel thing, Inuyasha
is gonna be wanting to KISS me for the rest of the fic??!" Sesshoumaru
scooted further away from his brother.
Among other things....
"OTHER THINGS?!??!" Inuyasha screamed.
"I am GONE!!" Sesshoumaru jumped up and was about to leave when he
stopped, because we all know the narrator's not gonna let her hot little stud
muffin leave so easily.
You stay. You've gotta get the dash monster remember?
"Ahh shit...I forgot about that damn thing." Inuyasha growled. "Dammit...at
this point, I say forget it!!"
"Yeah!" Sesshoumaru agreed since he had to stay anyway. "Just
end the whole thing!"
Nope. This keeps going cause I say so. Besides, if we end the Dash Monster story,
I'll just turn it into a lemon for the hell of it. It's not like Inuyasha would
object much now.
Inuyasha turned slightly green....but didn't disagree which made Sesshoumaru
very very uneasy.
OK! Now then! On with the story. Which...will have to wait until the next chapter!
"Stay away from me..." Sesshoumaru moved very far away from Inuyasha.