Title: A Good Day To Die
Rating: PG-13 (Probably overrated.)
Summary: A one chapter ff from Draco's POV.
Warnings: Very sad. If you don't like sad, don't read, don't flame.
Disclaimer: All characters in story belong to J.K. Rowling. If they were mine, I'd have them invent a spell to get into our world.
Notes: I wrote this immediately following a bout of depression. So, here it is. It's short, sad, and mine. (Mostly. See above.) Hope you like. Don't forget to R&R!
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I stared out the window into the dark. It was raining. I used to love the rain. It was cold and wet and always left a wonderful mossy smell behind.
I used to love it.
Now, I love nothing. Not even myself, which I was about to prove.
I hate everything. My life. My home. My father. I couldn't hate my mother. She was dead. Had been since I was six. Oh, for all appearances she was alive. And I guess technically, she was alive. On the outside. On the inside she was dead. All the beating and hexing my father had done to us had finally taken its toll on her. I didn't blame her. I almost wished I could join her.
I hated school. Everyone hated me. Except Slytherins. They worshipped me. Disgusting. If they hadn't hated me, maybe things would be different.
But Malfoys aren't nice, Father says so. And I always go by what Father says. I'm afraid of him.
Dumbledore was the worst. He didn't approve of me. Thought I was evil like my father, I guess.
I'm nothing like my father. If I were, I wouldn't be doing this.
But Dumbledore never helped at all. Maybe if he had been considerate, had tried to get to know me, understand me... maybe.
I read a book, by some muggle doctor or other, which said that anger, sarcasm, and criticalness were often signs of loneliness, pain, rejection, and low self-esteem. I wish someone else would read that book.
I hated Lucius. He had done this to me. By beating the Malfoy ways and rules into me at a young age he had turned me into a monster. Someone- no, something everyone hated. That Potter and The Dream Team hated. I had always admired Potter. And envied him. He had friends, fame, people who loved him. And he was brave. He never would have taken what I get from Lucius.
Sometimes, I wonder where I would be if Potter and I had been friends. Or even civil. But it's too late for that now.
But most of all, more than I hated school, Dumbledore, or Lucius, I hated myself. The way I was sarcastic, sadistic, and cruel. The way I feared my father. The way I was so... Malfoy.
That, above all, was the main reason I was doing this.
I sighed as I turned from the window and walked over to my bed. I had to do this before he got home and I chickened out. I sat on the edge of my bed and looked at my hands and my wand for a long time. Then, with my wand, I slowly cut the slits on my wrists and lay back on my bed.
As I lay there I remembered a muggle book I once read. In the book two Indian warriors faced each other in battle. On says to the other,
"Today, you will die."
And the other answers back,
"Then it is a good day to die."
And it is a good day to die...
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There it is. I don't know if it's overrated or not. He does commit suicide, so... I don't know. Anyway, hope you liked it. I know it's short but that's all I have. I warned you about it being short in my notes above. Well, R&R everyone!