The green moon Xeraxis was high in the window of the Devastis Irken High Conciliate building. Purple stood watching the soldiers march on the grounds outside, perfectly in time.
"Man, I do not want to do this again." Red whined. He was sprawled over a couch, and sucking on a soda. "Every time I turn around, we're being summoned again. Seems like we've been spending more time here than aboard the Massive, where we should be." He pounded on the padded arm of the couch. The room was lavishly furnished, as were all the rooms meant to accommodate the Tallest.
"I know, but what can we do? Tell it 'no?'" Purple answered. "Besides, it wouldn't summon us if it didn't have good reason."
Red stopped slurping his soda. "What do you mean by that?" He said nervously.
Before Purple could respond, a lanky irken official with purple eyes sauntered into the doorway. "My lords. The chamber is ready."
Red and Purple walked onto the small circular platform, the quiet humming sound from their hoverskirts echoing in the spherical chamber. Just before them, a great suspended metal sphere loomed ominously. Tubes and umbilicals that connected the sphere to the ceiling and floor that gave the object a sickly organic feel, and several green glass eyes spotted the mechanical apparition. Though obviously unliving, the eyes seemed to stare at the two with a sharpness that pierced through their armor and any defenses and mental blocks they had set up, real or imagined.
Slowly, the metal floor in front of both of them began to liquify and form itself into two spheres. At about a foot wide, the orbs separated from the floor and hovered like oversized drops of mercury. Both Tallest glanced at each other, and then simultaneously knelt before the orbs, reaching out and grasping them, and bowing their heads. They had practiced this so many times before that after 250 years, it'd gotten to be second nature to coordinate their movements and efforts when it was really necessary. But, no matter how many times they came here and did this, they never really got used to it. Both irkens gritted their teeth and braced themselves.
The Control Brain exploded into their minds, blaring inquiries and commands that thundered through their skulls like foghorns pumped though an amplifier, all at a rate faster than they could think. Purple, being the analytical one, had figured out a long time ago that most of the stuff happened below the surface. Their subconscious did most of the work, he said. On the surface, however, they could only make out one simple idea at a time, but had gotten pretty good at piecing the fragments together.
"EARTH--ZIM--WHY?"
Red was the first to respond; he always was. All the same, he had to make special effort to direct his thoughts to speech. It was trying to talk over a tornado. "Uhh. We'd gotten tired of his... daah... ineptitude and... eh... wanted to be rid of him...!" He shuddered as he clutched the orb. "We could never... uhh... use that planet, anyway--
The multiple glassy eyes flamed red. Red convulsed and screamed as electricity suddenly surged through him. He was thrown from the orb and fell backwards on the floor with a sickening metallic thud, shaking and gasping for air. His respirator was making a weird hissing sound. Purple watched his friend lie there but didn't dare come to his aid: the same thing would only happen to him.
"FOOL--EARTH--PERFECT--CONTROL--DESIRE--ZIM--DANGER--FORSEE--REMOVE--EARTH--PERFECT"
"But, why!? ...Perfect? ...What for?" Purple yelled, haltingly.
The eyes pulsed again with green light. A horrible gurgled whisper drifted through the Tallest's heads...
"MITOSIS..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I've got ya now, Zim!" Dib yelled, blaster trained at the menacing four-legged spidery shadow that skittered along the circular wall of the arena. He pulled the trigger and discharged two plasma blasts, which were dodged by the shadow and impacted the wall, the flash reflecting off two glaring magenta eyes in the darkness. Two identical plasma blasts barreled from the wall towards Dib, who rolled away from the blasts. Landing face-down on the metal floor, he propped himself up just in time to see Zim leap from the shadows, the needle-sharp points of his mechanical legs aimed directly at him. Dib ducked down and covered his head, and concentrated. With a metallic flash and a yelp, Zim's trajectory changed and the little green Irken crashed several yards behind Dib.
Dib quickly leapt to his feet, while Zim staggered like a drunken arachnid, trying to stand up. Dib looked up to see two long jointed metallic legs extending over him like skeletal wings. He concentrated, and one waved back and forth at Zim. "Hey, I think these things are actually getting easier to control!" Biting his lip, he forced the remaining two out from behind his trench coat. With effort, the 4 legs hit the metal floor with a clamor, and slowly Dib started to rise on them.
Zim was fully upright now. "All right then, Dib, let's see you handle this!" And with that, he aimed his blaster at Dib, and started firing. Dib yelped and leapt from the floor onto the wall, the needle-sharp metal appendages sliding a little and making sparks until he got his hold . He skittered up the wall and leapt across to the huge metallic stalactite that made up part of the ceiling, trying to take cover. He could hear plasma blasts accompany the whistling of exhaust through the ports in the hanging structure he clung onto. "Ha! You can't get me here, can ya, Zim?" He yelled.
The blasts stopped. "You forget who you're talking to, human. Eeeagh!" Zim yelled, and Dib heard a metallic banging and scratching sound from underneath him. He looked down, to see Zim steadying himself on the point of the stalactite, blaster in his hand. He'd managed to jump the 20 feet from the floor! Dib yelped and started to climb. Zim's blaster shots barely missed him as he flailed his arms in a misdirected instruction to his spiderlegs.
"Hah! This is almost too--uh?" Zim started to gloat, but changed his tone when the metal tips to his spiderlegs started to slip as friction was overcome by gravity. He tried to redrive the front legs into the metal, but before he could the back legs gave way, sending him with a scream and a crash to the arena floor.
"Zim??" Dib heard him land, and then leapt haltingly from stalactite to wall to floor, his spiderlegs landing with sparks and a metallic clanging sound. The metal appendages gingerly set him down, and then pulled obediently behind him, without folding up. He ran over to the mess of tangled metal legs and dazed Irken in the middle of the floor. "Are you all right?"
"Ungh. Yeah." Zim mumbled back, sitting up groggily. His splayed-out spiderlegs twitched chaotically around him. "Why wouldn't I be?" He rubbed the back of his head and grimaced.
"Oh. Okay. As long as you're alright…" Dib said, and aimed his blaster at Zim and shot him at point blank range. Zim flinched, but only out of instinct, as the harmless whisp spread around him, lighting up his outline and marking him as being shot. "I win." Dib said, holstering the blaster and helping Zim up. "Only because I got lucky, though. I still can't control these things very well." He involuntarily glanced behind him as his spiderlegs articulated creepily. He focused on them again, and each leg retracted individually behind his trenchcoat.
Zim's legs retracted as well, and he walked behind Dib and removed a familiar-looking oval-shaped object with pale orange spots. "Hey, you'll never be as good an I am, but you're just enough of a challenge to keep me entertained." He scoffed. He started to walk alongside Dib, carrying the Utility Pak. "I'm suprised that the superficial nerve interface is even working on this thing. Usually, these Paks only work if they're, directly attached to your spine, instead of just fastened to your back with a gravity attachment." Zim reached up and tousled Dib's hair. "Must be that big head of yours..."
"Uh--Hey!" Dib said, straightening his hair. He reached around and got Zim in a fake headlock. "Remember what happened last time you did that? You don't mess with my hair." He said jokingly.
"You're proud of that mess on your head? Heh, and you say I look weird!" Zim grinned, writhing around and pulling out from under Dib's arm. As they approached the elevator, Zim stopped. "Go on ahead of me. I'll catch up."
Dib nodded and stood on the elevator, and slowly descended downward.
Zim placed the pak he was holding against a metal plate fastened to the arena wall, and it stuck fast with a loud *Chunk!*, next to a row of other paks, similarly equipped. He turned around and looked back at the arena. The converted power generator still hummed in partial operation, a hollow shell of what it once was. Once a crucial part of his impenetrable fortress, now it was used mainly for amusement. The blades of the exhaust fan cast slowly rotating shadows on the floor. Outcroppings in the wall and the stalactite-like electrode on the ceiling made for very useful cover, though; a pretty good spot for laser tag, thought Zim in consolation. He sighed and followed Dib into the elevator.
"Man, I do not want to do this again." Red whined. He was sprawled over a couch, and sucking on a soda. "Every time I turn around, we're being summoned again. Seems like we've been spending more time here than aboard the Massive, where we should be." He pounded on the padded arm of the couch. The room was lavishly furnished, as were all the rooms meant to accommodate the Tallest.
"I know, but what can we do? Tell it 'no?'" Purple answered. "Besides, it wouldn't summon us if it didn't have good reason."
Red stopped slurping his soda. "What do you mean by that?" He said nervously.
Before Purple could respond, a lanky irken official with purple eyes sauntered into the doorway. "My lords. The chamber is ready."
Red and Purple walked onto the small circular platform, the quiet humming sound from their hoverskirts echoing in the spherical chamber. Just before them, a great suspended metal sphere loomed ominously. Tubes and umbilicals that connected the sphere to the ceiling and floor that gave the object a sickly organic feel, and several green glass eyes spotted the mechanical apparition. Though obviously unliving, the eyes seemed to stare at the two with a sharpness that pierced through their armor and any defenses and mental blocks they had set up, real or imagined.
Slowly, the metal floor in front of both of them began to liquify and form itself into two spheres. At about a foot wide, the orbs separated from the floor and hovered like oversized drops of mercury. Both Tallest glanced at each other, and then simultaneously knelt before the orbs, reaching out and grasping them, and bowing their heads. They had practiced this so many times before that after 250 years, it'd gotten to be second nature to coordinate their movements and efforts when it was really necessary. But, no matter how many times they came here and did this, they never really got used to it. Both irkens gritted their teeth and braced themselves.
The Control Brain exploded into their minds, blaring inquiries and commands that thundered through their skulls like foghorns pumped though an amplifier, all at a rate faster than they could think. Purple, being the analytical one, had figured out a long time ago that most of the stuff happened below the surface. Their subconscious did most of the work, he said. On the surface, however, they could only make out one simple idea at a time, but had gotten pretty good at piecing the fragments together.
"EARTH--ZIM--WHY?"
Red was the first to respond; he always was. All the same, he had to make special effort to direct his thoughts to speech. It was trying to talk over a tornado. "Uhh. We'd gotten tired of his... daah... ineptitude and... eh... wanted to be rid of him...!" He shuddered as he clutched the orb. "We could never... uhh... use that planet, anyway--
The multiple glassy eyes flamed red. Red convulsed and screamed as electricity suddenly surged through him. He was thrown from the orb and fell backwards on the floor with a sickening metallic thud, shaking and gasping for air. His respirator was making a weird hissing sound. Purple watched his friend lie there but didn't dare come to his aid: the same thing would only happen to him.
"FOOL--EARTH--PERFECT--CONTROL--DESIRE--ZIM--DANGER--FORSEE--REMOVE--EARTH--PERFECT"
"But, why!? ...Perfect? ...What for?" Purple yelled, haltingly.
The eyes pulsed again with green light. A horrible gurgled whisper drifted through the Tallest's heads...
"MITOSIS..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I've got ya now, Zim!" Dib yelled, blaster trained at the menacing four-legged spidery shadow that skittered along the circular wall of the arena. He pulled the trigger and discharged two plasma blasts, which were dodged by the shadow and impacted the wall, the flash reflecting off two glaring magenta eyes in the darkness. Two identical plasma blasts barreled from the wall towards Dib, who rolled away from the blasts. Landing face-down on the metal floor, he propped himself up just in time to see Zim leap from the shadows, the needle-sharp points of his mechanical legs aimed directly at him. Dib ducked down and covered his head, and concentrated. With a metallic flash and a yelp, Zim's trajectory changed and the little green Irken crashed several yards behind Dib.
Dib quickly leapt to his feet, while Zim staggered like a drunken arachnid, trying to stand up. Dib looked up to see two long jointed metallic legs extending over him like skeletal wings. He concentrated, and one waved back and forth at Zim. "Hey, I think these things are actually getting easier to control!" Biting his lip, he forced the remaining two out from behind his trench coat. With effort, the 4 legs hit the metal floor with a clamor, and slowly Dib started to rise on them.
Zim was fully upright now. "All right then, Dib, let's see you handle this!" And with that, he aimed his blaster at Dib, and started firing. Dib yelped and leapt from the floor onto the wall, the needle-sharp metal appendages sliding a little and making sparks until he got his hold . He skittered up the wall and leapt across to the huge metallic stalactite that made up part of the ceiling, trying to take cover. He could hear plasma blasts accompany the whistling of exhaust through the ports in the hanging structure he clung onto. "Ha! You can't get me here, can ya, Zim?" He yelled.
The blasts stopped. "You forget who you're talking to, human. Eeeagh!" Zim yelled, and Dib heard a metallic banging and scratching sound from underneath him. He looked down, to see Zim steadying himself on the point of the stalactite, blaster in his hand. He'd managed to jump the 20 feet from the floor! Dib yelped and started to climb. Zim's blaster shots barely missed him as he flailed his arms in a misdirected instruction to his spiderlegs.
"Hah! This is almost too--uh?" Zim started to gloat, but changed his tone when the metal tips to his spiderlegs started to slip as friction was overcome by gravity. He tried to redrive the front legs into the metal, but before he could the back legs gave way, sending him with a scream and a crash to the arena floor.
"Zim??" Dib heard him land, and then leapt haltingly from stalactite to wall to floor, his spiderlegs landing with sparks and a metallic clanging sound. The metal appendages gingerly set him down, and then pulled obediently behind him, without folding up. He ran over to the mess of tangled metal legs and dazed Irken in the middle of the floor. "Are you all right?"
"Ungh. Yeah." Zim mumbled back, sitting up groggily. His splayed-out spiderlegs twitched chaotically around him. "Why wouldn't I be?" He rubbed the back of his head and grimaced.
"Oh. Okay. As long as you're alright…" Dib said, and aimed his blaster at Zim and shot him at point blank range. Zim flinched, but only out of instinct, as the harmless whisp spread around him, lighting up his outline and marking him as being shot. "I win." Dib said, holstering the blaster and helping Zim up. "Only because I got lucky, though. I still can't control these things very well." He involuntarily glanced behind him as his spiderlegs articulated creepily. He focused on them again, and each leg retracted individually behind his trenchcoat.
Zim's legs retracted as well, and he walked behind Dib and removed a familiar-looking oval-shaped object with pale orange spots. "Hey, you'll never be as good an I am, but you're just enough of a challenge to keep me entertained." He scoffed. He started to walk alongside Dib, carrying the Utility Pak. "I'm suprised that the superficial nerve interface is even working on this thing. Usually, these Paks only work if they're, directly attached to your spine, instead of just fastened to your back with a gravity attachment." Zim reached up and tousled Dib's hair. "Must be that big head of yours..."
"Uh--Hey!" Dib said, straightening his hair. He reached around and got Zim in a fake headlock. "Remember what happened last time you did that? You don't mess with my hair." He said jokingly.
"You're proud of that mess on your head? Heh, and you say I look weird!" Zim grinned, writhing around and pulling out from under Dib's arm. As they approached the elevator, Zim stopped. "Go on ahead of me. I'll catch up."
Dib nodded and stood on the elevator, and slowly descended downward.
Zim placed the pak he was holding against a metal plate fastened to the arena wall, and it stuck fast with a loud *Chunk!*, next to a row of other paks, similarly equipped. He turned around and looked back at the arena. The converted power generator still hummed in partial operation, a hollow shell of what it once was. Once a crucial part of his impenetrable fortress, now it was used mainly for amusement. The blades of the exhaust fan cast slowly rotating shadows on the floor. Outcroppings in the wall and the stalactite-like electrode on the ceiling made for very useful cover, though; a pretty good spot for laser tag, thought Zim in consolation. He sighed and followed Dib into the elevator.