Title: The Last of the Corinthians
Author: Daenar
Disclaimer: JAG is property of Belisarius Productions, CBS and Paramount
Pictures. No copyright infringement intended.
For the other text I use, luckily there isn't and never will be any copyright to observe.
Rating: PG Category: Christmas Vignette, Romance (H/M)
Summary: Just this - let Chaplain Turner fix things. Or: another way to have 'that talk'.
Author's note: Words can be so incredibly powerful, and there are some you can hear time and time again and still not grasp their full meaning. But if you listen carefully, each time they'll take up a little more meaning than before.
Once again this is the result of a moment's inspiration. So this hasn't been beta-read. Sorry for any mistakes.
Maybe the story will be a little difficult to read because of the layout. [Mac's thoughts] are going to be marked like this, (Harm's thoughts) like this. But I didn't want too many descriptions of the scene to interrupt the silent dialogue of words and thoughts. I hope you'll see through it.
*************************************
Dec. 24th 2326 ZULU - 1826 EST Naval Academy Chapel Annapolis, MD
The silence stretched as the dignified old man in the blue class A uniform let his wise, dark eyes slowly travel over the small congregation. When he could be sure of everyone's attention, he raised his voice that to outsiders might seem old and uneven. But those who knew him had been given enough proof of how its owner knew to use it - making frozen hearts melt, shifting a life's load of unresolved issues in a few moments' time.
(I wonder if he knows how much he's drawing us in by just looking at us. I'm only glad Sturgis doesn't use that tactic in court.)
[I can't believe it: I'm afraid. Call it a premonition but I'm sure he'll again say something that'll make me come close to crying. I just hope Harm won't notice. Why can't he just sit in another row? Like two years ago? No, he's sitting right beside me. So close. Too close.]
"I know that tonight I should probably speak about the Gospel of St. Luke," Chaplain Turner began with a slight smile. "But those who of you who were here last year or the year before know that I don't always stick to what's expected of me. Two years ago, for instance, I told you the story of Joseph - not of Jesus, or Mary. And as many of you told me afterwards, it became clear that there are indeed some aspects to Christmas that are barely mentioned - or aren't even mentioned at all - in tonight's Gospel. And yet, they are key issues. Like Joseph, the father. And if that sermon two years ago made some of you see your own fathers in a different light, then the words have worked a small wonder inside you."
[They did. Definitely. And I'm still not sure what to make of it.]
(In a way. and not just Dad. Frank as well.)
"Now, if we take a closer look at St. Luke, we'll discover something truly shocking. In the whole second chapter that tells us the very story why we celebrate Christmas each year, the word 'love' doesn't appear at all. Not once, can you imagine? All those carols, telling us of the 'Season of Love', and not one reference to it in today's Gospel! Actually, I think this is something we have to remedy in this service.
"Love is the one power that is able to overcome any adversities that might bring people to hate each other. It will heal any wounds that we may be hurting from. And it will close any gaps that might possibly separate us from those whom we'd want to be close to. The power of love exceeds all understanding. As long as we keep up our hopes for whatever wonders love can do in our lives, we'll keep on loving. Anyone of you: search your hearts, and you will know what I mean."
[Don't I know it. just wish it were true.]
(Don't I know it. just wish it were true.)
"So, instead of talking about St. Luke, I want to turn to St. Paul tonight because he has expressed the true meaning, yes, the very nature of love, in such a masterful way that his words - although 2000 years old - still ring inside our hearts and make us experience what love is about. All we need to do is listen. St. Paul wrote a letter to the Corinthian Christian community - and in a way, we all are Corinthians tonight. Let us hear his message."
(Sir, please. don't do this to me. not here, not tonight. Couldn't you choose something else instead? Something that'd be easier to digest when Mac's sitting so close to me. something like.hope, for instance? No, same effect. Faith, maybe? No, doesn't work, either - because I've always had faith in her and always will. Anyway: anything, just not love. God, let me wake from this quickly.)
[I knew it. I knew this was going to be hard. Proven right once again. God, keep me from running.]
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."
[Nothing, indeed.]
"Love is patient and kind;"
(Theoretically, yes.)
[Patient. 'as long as it takes.' That hurts.]
"Love is not jealous or boastful;"
[I wish he had been jealous back then, though.]
(No, not true. I was jealous. and I am now. but I know I shouldn't be. All that should matter to me is her happiness.)
"It is not arrogant or rude;"
[Then why do we keep sniping at each other? We're being rude all the time. Does that mean what's between Harm and me isn't love then? God. does that mean I was really thinking it were?]
(Not arrogant. then maybe it's me after all who screwed up. I've been incredibly arrogant at times. Mac, I'm so sorry.)
"Love does not insist on its own way;"
[.does not insist. Oh, Harm, I'm so sorry I kept bugging you for those words. I should have listened to your way of telling me. if there was anything you wanted to tell me, that is.]
"It is not irritable or resentful;"
(Well, I guess, I was just that when you came to me to talk about the Imes affair. You called me 17 times and I ignored it. Resentful covers it quite well, doesn't it?)
"It does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right."
[I do. All those wonderful times we had together.]
(There are so many memories of the 'right', wherever I go, Mac. 'We' would have been right.)
[God, Harm, at times, you and me. just felt. 'right'. I still can't believe we aren't.]
"Love bears all things, endures all things."
[Will we bear this? Please, Harm, tell me we'll get through this, please.]
(I was ready to close this chapter once and for all. After Paraguay, for a while, I felt so. void, so drained. but I guess St. Paul's right here. My. love? Yes, I'll admit it: my love. The feeling is still there, Mac. Tell me that you and me, we'll endure this.)
[Great God. he took my hand. Does that mean he's answering my question? Does that mean he feels. Help me understand you, Harm!]
(I can't believe I just did that. And yet. she's tense but she didn't pull away. Would she really understand what's going on inside me? Mac, look at me. just look and you'll know for sure.)
"Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away."
(Perfect...)
[Perfect...]
(The way she looks at me really takes my breath away... as if she knew what I'm thinking.)
[No walls, no mask, no denying - I never thought I'd ever see him this sincere. 'The imperfect will pass away'... Harm, my knowledge of you was imperfect. But I think it won't be anymore. I feel like I can read you. God, I feel like crying with gratitude that you let me see this...]
"When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood."
(No more guessing, Mac. I did give up my childish ways. I won't hide anymore. You understood me. And I promise I'll understand you as well if you'll give me the chance.)
['Face to face'. Read mine now, Harm, as I'm reading yours.]
"So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love."
(I have faith in you, Mac...)
[Harm, I have faith in you...]
(And I still have hope.)
[And there is hope for us. I love you, Harm.]
(I love you.)
The silence was heavy - but it was warm and tender, uniting all in the feeling they had been able to experience through the chaplain's words. And among them were two who had finally understood.
THE END
***A joyful Advent to all of you!***
For the other text I use, luckily there isn't and never will be any copyright to observe.
Rating: PG Category: Christmas Vignette, Romance (H/M)
Summary: Just this - let Chaplain Turner fix things. Or: another way to have 'that talk'.
Author's note: Words can be so incredibly powerful, and there are some you can hear time and time again and still not grasp their full meaning. But if you listen carefully, each time they'll take up a little more meaning than before.
Once again this is the result of a moment's inspiration. So this hasn't been beta-read. Sorry for any mistakes.
Maybe the story will be a little difficult to read because of the layout. [Mac's thoughts] are going to be marked like this, (Harm's thoughts) like this. But I didn't want too many descriptions of the scene to interrupt the silent dialogue of words and thoughts. I hope you'll see through it.
*************************************
Dec. 24th 2326 ZULU - 1826 EST Naval Academy Chapel Annapolis, MD
The silence stretched as the dignified old man in the blue class A uniform let his wise, dark eyes slowly travel over the small congregation. When he could be sure of everyone's attention, he raised his voice that to outsiders might seem old and uneven. But those who knew him had been given enough proof of how its owner knew to use it - making frozen hearts melt, shifting a life's load of unresolved issues in a few moments' time.
(I wonder if he knows how much he's drawing us in by just looking at us. I'm only glad Sturgis doesn't use that tactic in court.)
[I can't believe it: I'm afraid. Call it a premonition but I'm sure he'll again say something that'll make me come close to crying. I just hope Harm won't notice. Why can't he just sit in another row? Like two years ago? No, he's sitting right beside me. So close. Too close.]
"I know that tonight I should probably speak about the Gospel of St. Luke," Chaplain Turner began with a slight smile. "But those who of you who were here last year or the year before know that I don't always stick to what's expected of me. Two years ago, for instance, I told you the story of Joseph - not of Jesus, or Mary. And as many of you told me afterwards, it became clear that there are indeed some aspects to Christmas that are barely mentioned - or aren't even mentioned at all - in tonight's Gospel. And yet, they are key issues. Like Joseph, the father. And if that sermon two years ago made some of you see your own fathers in a different light, then the words have worked a small wonder inside you."
[They did. Definitely. And I'm still not sure what to make of it.]
(In a way. and not just Dad. Frank as well.)
"Now, if we take a closer look at St. Luke, we'll discover something truly shocking. In the whole second chapter that tells us the very story why we celebrate Christmas each year, the word 'love' doesn't appear at all. Not once, can you imagine? All those carols, telling us of the 'Season of Love', and not one reference to it in today's Gospel! Actually, I think this is something we have to remedy in this service.
"Love is the one power that is able to overcome any adversities that might bring people to hate each other. It will heal any wounds that we may be hurting from. And it will close any gaps that might possibly separate us from those whom we'd want to be close to. The power of love exceeds all understanding. As long as we keep up our hopes for whatever wonders love can do in our lives, we'll keep on loving. Anyone of you: search your hearts, and you will know what I mean."
[Don't I know it. just wish it were true.]
(Don't I know it. just wish it were true.)
"So, instead of talking about St. Luke, I want to turn to St. Paul tonight because he has expressed the true meaning, yes, the very nature of love, in such a masterful way that his words - although 2000 years old - still ring inside our hearts and make us experience what love is about. All we need to do is listen. St. Paul wrote a letter to the Corinthian Christian community - and in a way, we all are Corinthians tonight. Let us hear his message."
(Sir, please. don't do this to me. not here, not tonight. Couldn't you choose something else instead? Something that'd be easier to digest when Mac's sitting so close to me. something like.hope, for instance? No, same effect. Faith, maybe? No, doesn't work, either - because I've always had faith in her and always will. Anyway: anything, just not love. God, let me wake from this quickly.)
[I knew it. I knew this was going to be hard. Proven right once again. God, keep me from running.]
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."
[Nothing, indeed.]
"Love is patient and kind;"
(Theoretically, yes.)
[Patient. 'as long as it takes.' That hurts.]
"Love is not jealous or boastful;"
[I wish he had been jealous back then, though.]
(No, not true. I was jealous. and I am now. but I know I shouldn't be. All that should matter to me is her happiness.)
"It is not arrogant or rude;"
[Then why do we keep sniping at each other? We're being rude all the time. Does that mean what's between Harm and me isn't love then? God. does that mean I was really thinking it were?]
(Not arrogant. then maybe it's me after all who screwed up. I've been incredibly arrogant at times. Mac, I'm so sorry.)
"Love does not insist on its own way;"
[.does not insist. Oh, Harm, I'm so sorry I kept bugging you for those words. I should have listened to your way of telling me. if there was anything you wanted to tell me, that is.]
"It is not irritable or resentful;"
(Well, I guess, I was just that when you came to me to talk about the Imes affair. You called me 17 times and I ignored it. Resentful covers it quite well, doesn't it?)
"It does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right."
[I do. All those wonderful times we had together.]
(There are so many memories of the 'right', wherever I go, Mac. 'We' would have been right.)
[God, Harm, at times, you and me. just felt. 'right'. I still can't believe we aren't.]
"Love bears all things, endures all things."
[Will we bear this? Please, Harm, tell me we'll get through this, please.]
(I was ready to close this chapter once and for all. After Paraguay, for a while, I felt so. void, so drained. but I guess St. Paul's right here. My. love? Yes, I'll admit it: my love. The feeling is still there, Mac. Tell me that you and me, we'll endure this.)
[Great God. he took my hand. Does that mean he's answering my question? Does that mean he feels. Help me understand you, Harm!]
(I can't believe I just did that. And yet. she's tense but she didn't pull away. Would she really understand what's going on inside me? Mac, look at me. just look and you'll know for sure.)
"Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away."
(Perfect...)
[Perfect...]
(The way she looks at me really takes my breath away... as if she knew what I'm thinking.)
[No walls, no mask, no denying - I never thought I'd ever see him this sincere. 'The imperfect will pass away'... Harm, my knowledge of you was imperfect. But I think it won't be anymore. I feel like I can read you. God, I feel like crying with gratitude that you let me see this...]
"When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood."
(No more guessing, Mac. I did give up my childish ways. I won't hide anymore. You understood me. And I promise I'll understand you as well if you'll give me the chance.)
['Face to face'. Read mine now, Harm, as I'm reading yours.]
"So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love."
(I have faith in you, Mac...)
[Harm, I have faith in you...]
(And I still have hope.)
[And there is hope for us. I love you, Harm.]
(I love you.)
The silence was heavy - but it was warm and tender, uniting all in the feeling they had been able to experience through the chaplain's words. And among them were two who had finally understood.
THE END
***A joyful Advent to all of you!***