Disclaimer: The characters herein are created by Anthony Zuiker and are the properties of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation/CBS. I do not own or make any monies off of the characters in this story.
SPOILER WARNING! Highly spoiled for Butterflied.
A/N: This is a song fic and the song is White Flag by Dido. If you recommend this fic, please be responsible and include the spoiler warning. I want to thank Marlou/Ghibli for her help in giving this fic life and to LSI for beta'ing and giving me encouragement.
I couldn't help it today when I heard this song and all I could do was imagine it playing as the background music for the scene.
Hope you enjoy it and if so, let me know! Feedback is truly appreciated.
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Never Surrender
~
I
know you think that I shouldn't still love you, I'll tell you that.
But if I didn't say it, well I'd still have felt it. Where's the sense in that?
Her eyes dart back and forth between the men just on the other side of the glass. The suspect, cold and haughty stares after Grissom with a predatory glare, as Grissom paces around the room. Sensing the build up in the room, the hair on the back of her neck rises.
I promise I'm not trying to make your
life harder or return to where we were.
The words of the man she'd shown interest in –once a friend, now her boss –drew her attention. His voice has dropped, almost to a whisper, as he speaks of the passion that the doctor felt for his victim.
"If you keep saying 'no' to embracing the moment, when you finally say yes, it becomes bigger than you. And you are no longer you anymore. You're somebody else. Abstraction becomes reality. All you think about is her."
This is no longer about Dr. Lurie. It's become something much more personal.
His voice grows stronger and he states, "You want to be with her. Eat with her. Laugh with her. Make love to her." Grissom's face furrows into a frown, as if in agony. Sara strains again to hear his last words as they fade away. Her eyes grow with disbelief at his impassioned delivery. Is he talking about Lurie or is this some deeper introspection? "Go into infinity with her. Without doors. No boundaries. No restrictions. An entire lifetime that comes down to this single frame of life."
A tear slowly runs down her face, and this time its taste is not bitter.
The suspect asks, "Who are you talking about Mr. Grissom?"
Grissom stops his pacing and stares at the fiend he sees sitting before him. "I'm talking about every man who's been there."
Well
I will go down with this ship and I won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door. I'm in love and always will be.
It's almost too much to take in and she blocks out the rest of the exchange. It no longer has a bearing on what he's said… what he's confessed. 'Does he know I'm here? Does he know I heard him?'
She shakes her head as if to clear the cobwebs from around it. The last thing she wants is more tension, more grief between them. She steps to the door to leave…
I know I left too much mess and
destruction to come
back again and I caused nothing but trouble.
I understand if you can't talk to me again and if you live by the
rules of "it's over" then I'm sure that that makes sense.
Then she hears a loud crash and swings back to see the table and chairs overturned, and the suspect lunging at Grissom. His arm flies out, hitting Grissom squarely in the face, then again and again. Brass and the officers scramble to tackle the suspect and protect Grissom. As they pull them apart, Dr. Lurie pushes off of Grissom, sending him crashing to the floor.
She runs over to the glass, her hand now on the door knob to enter the Interrogation Room. She hesitates when she sees Brass and another officer pinning the suspect to the wall. Her eyes dart back to Grissom as he stands to his feet and then to Brass, his words unheard by Sara, as he escorts the man out of the room.
Well I will go down with this ship and I
won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door. I'm in love and always will be.
And when we meet, which I'm sure we will, all that was then will be there still.
I'll let it pass and hold my tongue and you will think that I've moved on...
Her fingers slip slowly from the door knob, hesitating for a mere second before completely letting go. Her need to comfort the man she loves warring against her knowledge that he would never accept it. Her eyes still glisten from the earlier tears and she walks to stand before him as he looks in the two-way mirror, examining his eye.
Well I will go down with this ship and I
won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door. I'm in love and always will be.
Her hand, fingers out-stretched, raises and skims over the barrier –her fingers whispering over the glass.
Well I will go down with this ship and I
won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door. I'm in love and always will be.
His hand touches the bruise in his examination and pulls back as he hits a tender spot. He looks back at the mirror in surprise. She watches him turn away, walking to the door. Her heart skips a beat, her legs cemented to the floor, keeping her from running away. He reaches for the door knob; her apprehension grows as she sees it turn on her side.
The cement crumbles and she starts to move forward when the door opens. Grissom steps through and she gasps as their eyes meet. His jaw drops in surprise and he takes a step back. Their gazes hold for a moment as the suspension rises and she can only think of fleeing. She tries to walk by him but he straightens and intercepts her with a hand on her arm. She looks from it back to his eyes and she sees the resignation, no…the surrender, in his blue eyes. She grasps his hand, never taking her eyes away from his and closes the remaining distance between them.
The taste of victory was never sweeter.
Well I will go down with this ship and I
won't put my hands up and surrender.
There will be no white flag above my door. I'm in love and always will be.