A/N: I am assuming that, although Sai is a ghost, his bond with Hikaru allows him to –somehow- solidize when it comes to skin on skin contact. This is based on the anime.
Disclaimer: I do not claim to own Hikaru no Go, and I make no money from this work of fiction.
Summery: After Sai's disappearance, Hikaru tries to live on as if nothing has happened, but games alone can't make up for the loss of his closest companion. When Hikaru runs to fetch his grandpa an old porcelain cup from the attic, he sinks into old memories, and when he goes to the old goban, he finds himself face to face with Sai. But his old friend doesn't remember him…
-Prologue-
They can't see him, hear him, or sense him in any way. Sometimes he wonders if he exists anymore, or if he ever had. He realizes that he is slowly going insane, and at moments he doesn't even care, but those moments pass quickly.
'I am Fujiwara Sai, a Go player aiming for the divine move,' He recites this litany to himself in his less lucid moments, knowing that its words make up a vast part of his soul. The times that worry him most are when he can't remember why. He plays the games out in his head, every one of the thousands he has ever played. Over and over he plays them, faster and faster, ranking the opponents in strength, and looking on in wonder at the change of style that takes place over years. In his mind he categorizes the games, and he finds one group that sticks out.
For that group, the names of his opponents would not come to mind.
This infuriated him, and devastated him. These games were interesting, much different from the others, as if the old techniques had developed into something… more. Logic was that he would have a place stored in his brain for all information about them, including details on the players, their ages and such. There was nothing.
One of the opponents that he could not recall appealed to him further then the rest. The unknown competitor played more then half the games, hundreds of them, and improved over these games with obvious steps of comprehension. The fire of youth, the determination of someone with a distinct purpose. It motivated him.
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Sai's grasp of time was absent, neither passing by quickly or sluggishly. He wondered if time, measured in minutes, hours, days, or years, had any meaning for him in his present state.
He found himself obsessing feverishly over the unknown opponent, yearning to remember him, sensing the threads of connection that seemed to form an invisible path between them. He felt… alive again.
-Chapter One-
"Hikaru!" Yelled the old man from across the room, "You can't just sit there playing Go! If you can't find anything else to do, run up to the attic and find me your Grandma's good porcelain."
Hikaru sighed in exasperation, he obviously *could* spend a day without doing a thing but playing Go, he *was* a professional player. Still, deciding to humor his senile grandpa, he stood up and walked slowly up to the attic, pushing open the door.
Dust clouded the room, dulling its mood to gray. Saturday afternoon sun shined through a window above the biggest trunk in the room. Most of the vases and cups in it were cracked, but he was sure there was some good stuff in there somewhere. 'Although it does depend on your definition of good' He smirked to himself and looked in disgust at his grandpa's old treasures lying about.
Hikaru remembered his game downstairs and hastily opened the lid of the trunk, starting to rummage around, throwing the rejected objects behind him. Just as he was about to pull out some more pieces of pottery, his hand froze.
He had sold most of the expensive stuff grandpa owned after allowance cuts… The last time he had come looking for anything had been… When Sai appeared.
A grimace ran through Hikaru's expression. Slowly he brought his hand back and fell to the ground in an ungraceful sprawl, back against the hard floor. Subconsciously, his head leaned towards the place where he knew the Goban was setting. It seemed to call out to him, and he couldn't resist the urge to move over there and look.
He stood above the goban, practically seeing the stain again, right where it should have been.
It was so clear that he looked away, but his head turned back on it's own accord. A second later he collapsed onto the board, tears clouding his eyes. All of the games… all of them should be Sai's, but he had selfishly stolen them from the formally trapped spirit. Sai had spent nearly a thousand years in a Goban waiting to play, and he had ignored this out of pure spite.
Through his tears he could still see the stain.
Eyes widening in astonishment, Hikaru startled upward and ran his figures over the disfiguration.
"You can see it?"
"S-Sai?" Hikaru croaked out hoarsely. "No no no no no no no no, this can't be right, it isn't real, it can't be…" The 16 year-olds voice drifted off, eyes rolling back, before finally subsiding to the shock and falling away from the world.
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Sai's bliss at his awakening, and his apparent separation from the goban was somewhat… dulled by the teenagers collapse. When he had seen the boy crumpling to the ground he had automatically gone to catch him, but it seemed the damage had already been done.
Sai studied his saviors pale face, wondering if this was sickness, or shock. Honinbo Shuusaku had been prone to suffering from many illnesses as a child; he pitied this boy if the same affliction affected him. Still, his new acquaintance seemed to be breathing normally, and his color seemed to be bleeding back into his face.
'He knew my name…' Sai thought back on the few words the boy had said. 'Why did he know my name?'
After pondering this for a while, and getting absolutely nowhere, the renowned spirit gave up and waited for the black bleached hair kid to wake.
Tick-tock: One minute passed
Tick-tock: One minute thirty seconds gone
Tick-tock: One minute forty-five seconds
The spirit reached the end of his patience rather quickly for one accustomed to playing games of Go that lasted nearly three hours.
Long hair flowed as Sai's head turned with super fast speed, back and forth, taking in the rooms assortment of objects. He found himself getting up and jumping around with bursts of joy. Certainly nothing could compare to his happiness.
"Hikaru! Have you found it?" An old mans voice sounded from the below.
Sai gasped a little in surprise. It hadn't occurred to him that other people were here. He wondered if they would be able to see him. It had only been Shuusaku before.
"Hikaru, don't make me come up there!"
Sai giggled a little, unable to keep it in, he could hear again, see again! Something else gnawed on the edges of his senses, but he ignored it.
tbc
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written: 12/04/03
somewhat revised: 12/04/03
Sei Hishida