Pathetic. God, she's pathetic. You know, i used to respect the little witch. She seemed to have a head on her shoulders, the one who would think things through and not act to....childish.
I thought she had a good strong hold on her powers....that she could handle them. When things were rough, you could see how she tried to get ahold of them and try to help everyone out. She also used to be so strong. not this snivelling little mess here. When Oz left, she didn't mope about it. It seemed like i was the only one who noticed the chits pain.
But maybe thats where this whole bloody mess started. When she casted the spell. How can someone like that, whos strong and loyal to her friends and helps to save this miserable world..how can she be so selfish? She was probaley the member of the scooby gang i respected the most. She listened to me whine and be a bloody git when dru left. She let me do that, she didn't have too, but she comforted me as well.
But now look at her! She's a mess. Emotionally and physically. How can one person be so bloody selfish? She's just laying there, looking at buffy, asking the poor girl for forgiveness.
Buffy. God how i love that girl. How I respect, admire, envy, love, and yet hate that girl. Look at how strong she.. you can pratically see the enternal battle shes going through. Her eyes...her beauitful brown strong eyes. How dead they look..... how alive they once were. I know why shes dead. They know now to, but they don't truly understand it. I do. I don't know why,
i just do.
I know she doesn't love me. Hell, i'll be surprised if she even likes me. Yet shes with me. I'm a bad man. I take advantage of her. I know shes not with me because she loves me or likes me. Shes only doing it to feel alive again. I'm probaley the only thing in this world
that makes her feel...human. Well, not me, but the things we do. The things i let her do to me. The things i do to her. No, i'm not proud of what I do. But I love her so damn much! I don't even know why. I just do. she's just so strong..so beautiful and strong and loyal..she's a goddess.
Yes, I too am pathetic. Me and Red so create a bloody club. we're both pathetic. We both use things that are much to powerful or good for us. I use Buffy like Red uses magic. For our own selfish needs. Maybe I am too human. Maybe I should just snap the slayers neck when I see her again.
Yeah, thats what I think I'll do tonight.
Bloody Hell. I know i can't do it. I'm just too in love with this girl. and She'll never love me back. I'll just hold on to what we're doing now. This thing we do that lets us both us each other. I use her vunerablity. She uses me to feel alive. Maybe we're all just pathetic. All of them in their little gang. Every damn vampire and human in this godforsaken world Giles, when he left the poor girl because he was "standing in the way". Not likely. He deserted her. and turned her to me, in a way.
I'm pathetic, Red is pathetic, maybe its just in our nature to be that way.
I can't stop being this way. I'll continue to do this until she realizes what shes doing. Until she realizes that she doesn't need me. Until she sees that I'm just a monster who needs her for his own selfish needs. Until she sees me for what I really am...
...pathetic.
I thought she had a good strong hold on her powers....that she could handle them. When things were rough, you could see how she tried to get ahold of them and try to help everyone out. She also used to be so strong. not this snivelling little mess here. When Oz left, she didn't mope about it. It seemed like i was the only one who noticed the chits pain.
But maybe thats where this whole bloody mess started. When she casted the spell. How can someone like that, whos strong and loyal to her friends and helps to save this miserable world..how can she be so selfish? She was probaley the member of the scooby gang i respected the most. She listened to me whine and be a bloody git when dru left. She let me do that, she didn't have too, but she comforted me as well.
But now look at her! She's a mess. Emotionally and physically. How can one person be so bloody selfish? She's just laying there, looking at buffy, asking the poor girl for forgiveness.
Buffy. God how i love that girl. How I respect, admire, envy, love, and yet hate that girl. Look at how strong she.. you can pratically see the enternal battle shes going through. Her eyes...her beauitful brown strong eyes. How dead they look..... how alive they once were. I know why shes dead. They know now to, but they don't truly understand it. I do. I don't know why,
i just do.
I know she doesn't love me. Hell, i'll be surprised if she even likes me. Yet shes with me. I'm a bad man. I take advantage of her. I know shes not with me because she loves me or likes me. Shes only doing it to feel alive again. I'm probaley the only thing in this world
that makes her feel...human. Well, not me, but the things we do. The things i let her do to me. The things i do to her. No, i'm not proud of what I do. But I love her so damn much! I don't even know why. I just do. she's just so strong..so beautiful and strong and loyal..she's a goddess.
Yes, I too am pathetic. Me and Red so create a bloody club. we're both pathetic. We both use things that are much to powerful or good for us. I use Buffy like Red uses magic. For our own selfish needs. Maybe I am too human. Maybe I should just snap the slayers neck when I see her again.
Yeah, thats what I think I'll do tonight.
Bloody Hell. I know i can't do it. I'm just too in love with this girl. and She'll never love me back. I'll just hold on to what we're doing now. This thing we do that lets us both us each other. I use her vunerablity. She uses me to feel alive. Maybe we're all just pathetic. All of them in their little gang. Every damn vampire and human in this godforsaken world Giles, when he left the poor girl because he was "standing in the way". Not likely. He deserted her. and turned her to me, in a way.
I'm pathetic, Red is pathetic, maybe its just in our nature to be that way.
I can't stop being this way. I'll continue to do this until she realizes what shes doing. Until she realizes that she doesn't need me. Until she sees that I'm just a monster who needs her for his own selfish needs. Until she sees me for what I really am...
...pathetic.