Chapter 7; Hmmm.. Anyone for fruit??? And the curse of the old and withered

Sango and Kagome sat on a very large rock outside the village, "It's MY rock!"

"My rock!!!" Kagome retorted,

"It loves me more!!!" Sango yelled, Kagome's eyes got all big and dewy, "I'm sorry Kagome!!!!! It's yours!!!" Sango hugged her.

"Any problems up there??" Inu Yasha and Miroku blinked from below the rock,

"NO!!!!!!!!!" the girls yelled in unison.

Blink.

Blink.

Blink.

Blink.

"WHAT??????!!!!!" the girls yelled. (a/n: **Inu Yasha comes over and taps Hime-chan on the shoulder** "Yes?" **bop!!!!** "OOWWW!!!")

"Quit it with the OOC comments Hime or you're grounded!" Inu Yasha snarled,

"Yeah PMS much Hime?" Miroku smirked, **WHAM** Three equally sore lumps formed on top Miroku's head.

"Hentai.." Sango growled.

"Lech.." Kagome scowled, (A/n: How Inu Yasha like!!! ^-^)

(A/n: Sexist...)

Inu Yasha walks over next to Miroku and stops blinking for a second then. **FWAP!!!**

"What was THAT for Inu Yasha???" Miroku growled,

"What, I felt outta place!" Inu Yasha shrugged innocently. The others look at him then shrugged.

"FRUIT!!! GET YOUR FRESH FRUIT!!!" a boy with short black hair in a pigtail with blue eyes and a Chinese suit walked around with a boy with long black hair and green eyes covered up with swirly geek glasses (A/n: I couldn't help it!!! And if you don't know these famous Rimuko Takahashi characters.. HOW DARE YOU CALL YOURSELVES HER FANS!!!) Also wearing a Chinese suit with long sleeves.

Kagome grabbed her comic book (Ranma ½) and blinked then looked back at Ranma. Book. Ranma. Book. Ranma. Ranma on the other hand took out his Inu Yasha comic book at looked at Kagome, the book. Kagome. Book. Kagome. Book. Kagome. ****************GLOMP!!!!!********************

"RANMA!!!!"

"KAGOME!!!!!"

Blink.

Blink.

Blink.

Sango walked over to Mousse then blinked, "Eh." He blinked straightening his glasses,

"Eh." They counted to three then **********Glomp!!!!!!!************

"SANGO!"

"MOUSSE!!!!"

Inu Yasha and Miroku were speechless, "Nani?" a convenient wind. Tumbleweed. Another convenient wind, "OI!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY KAGOME?" Ranma and Inu Yasha scowled and looked at each other, each scowl matching the other, they blinked, eyes narrowed at the same time, eyebrows lifted, lips twisted upward, both stood turned away from each other, looked back, looked away, looked back again.

"OI! WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM???" Inu Yasha and Ranma yelled in unison, voices were exact,

"I can see why she likes you, total copy." Inu Yasha put a smug look on his face,

"I could say the same," Ranma grumbled. The two got caught in a death glare once again then turned and,

"FEH!!!!!" they gaped then looked at each other again,

"WHAT IN THE SEVEN LAYERS OF HELL IS GOING ON????" Ranma and Inu Yasha yelled together again.

Kagome and Shippo all through out this scene grabbed fruit from Ranma's cart and munched on strawberries.

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Miroku and Mousse had somewhat of a different time..

"So you're a sex god?" Mousse blinked looking in awe at Miroku,

"One of the best.." Miroku smirked,

"WOW!!!!" Mousse gasped, "Can I shake your hand???!!!"

Sango had become bored and frankly pissed at her uneventful conversation between guys. "Can I shake your hand???!!!" was the only thing Sango heard from the boys, everything else was blah blah blah, god, blah blah blah!

"You wanna shake his hand??? May I suggest this one???" Sango grabbed Miroku's right hand trying to unwrap it.

"Sango please. not to my god!" Mousse blinked.

"God if anyone's gonna be a god, its. ME!!!!" Sango pointed, Kagome through hearing Sango's conversation walked over and smirked,

"Hello, my goddess." Kagome said suavely,

"Oh but Kagome you are but MY goddess." Sango became all dewy eyed; now it was the boys' turn to watch.

"We are each other's goddesses.." Kagome smirked. Mousse passed the popcorn to Ranma.

"Well, I guess they don't want any fruit." Ranma turned to his fruit cart to find it empty, with only a little plump Kitzune in the middle. ***Sweat drop***

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Inu Yasha and Kagome were out finding dinner after a long argument with Kagome's 'goddess' Sango about men and how they pick their toes with chopsticks (A/n: EWWW!!! I love Mulan though.. ^.^) and how Miroku should just go with Inu Yasha instead. Kagome watched Inu Yasha with practiced easy run through the forest around her chasing their next meal, with a swift claw Inu Yasha brought down his prey, taking pride as he through a doe over behind his back with three rabbits in hand.

"EWWW!!!" Kagome looked at Inu Yasha's kill which still had it's eyes open.

"Gees, I'm sorry Kagome but we have to kill the 'cute' bunny rabbits for food." His voice gruff, yet in it's own sexy way. **Drool** "Are you drooling?"

Kagome was brought back to reality, "Uh no." she wiped it away.

"Whatever like I said, don't be so pitiful towards smaller cuter animals." Inu Yasha sighed adjusting the weight of the doe on his back.

"You think that's cute?" Kagome blink. Camera films in on rabid wolf snarling with blood dripping from its jaws. "That's cute!" Kagome said pointing. Inu Yasha blinked as Sango came out of nowhere with her hands balled up by her face with her eyes dewy and moving, she looked at the wolf,

"How cute!!!" She squealed then disappeared in with the fog surrounding them.

Blink.

Blink.

"Sango's weird Kagome I don't want you hanging around with her." Inu Yasha sighed; he turned to Kagome, who had big and dewy eyes once again,

"Isn't she great?" she wiped a tear from her eye.

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Miroku sensed a high power of Jaki and followed it, "Where are you going Miroku?" Sango blinked,

"Uh, to go check something out." He said walking off into the fog.

"Whatever.. Come to me Doom.." Sango watched Doom float to her blushing,

"Hello Sango.." Doom blushed even darker,

"You can talk????" Sango gasped,

"Yes, Kagome in bedded a Shikon Shard within in me cause we seem to have no use for them in this story anyway." Doom smirked (a/n: is that possible?) Naraku came out of nowhere.

"If that's the case then can I have them?" Naraku blinked,

"NO!!!!" Sango and Doom yelled,

"Besides aren't you late for Bingo?" Sango blinked,

"***GASP*** Kaede will start with out me!!!" Naraku disappeared. He then reappeared, "Oh yeah. Kukukukukukukuku.." he slowly disappeared (again).

"What a fag." Kagome came outta nowhere,

"Yeah." Sango smirked, "Hello my goddess."

"Hello." Kagome replied back suavely.

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Miroku walked into the fog deeper to find and old which, casting spells. She turned and took of her hood to reveal ugliness beyond all belief horrible eyes that could scare children from their beds, her skin could make a ghost seem dark, and hair of raven's feathers, she was hideous, a beast. "Oh hey Kikyo.."

"I am not Kikyo, I am Kikyo's uncle's brother's aunt's sister's father's mother's grandfather's great mother-in-law's former room mate." She hissed lowly.

"Oh, yeah, you are prettier than Kikyo.." Miroku nodded.

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Somewhere in the woods, we hear "ACHOOO!!" (a/n: What were you surprised?)

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Miroku sighed, "I know you're going to curse me."

"How did you come to that conclusion?" old woman looks up from 'book-of- 1,000-ways-to-curse-a-perverted-Hoshi-that-has-an-air-rip-who-loves-an- exterminator-with-a-gigantic-boomerang-that-has-be-recently-resurrected-for- the-old-and-scary'

"Call it hunch." He blinked,

"Okay."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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Sango and Kagome were in the fiercest battle of there life, it all came down to this..

"Got any threes?" Sango asked.

"Go fish."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Sango yelled in agony. Inu Yasha came outta the fog banks,

"Where have you been?" Kagome asked,

"Playing bingo." Inu Yasha answered,

"Who one?" Sango asked,

"Kaede.." Inu Yasha sighed,

"Pay up!" Kagome held her hand out to Sango,

"Why did I ever deny her sexiness?" she handed Kagome 5,000 yen. ($50)

A figure stepped out from the shadows, Inu Yasha fell over, Shippo gasped, Sango's eyes widened in delight, Kagome was. "Zzzzzzzzzzz.." Uh well now you know.

Miroku stepped forwards scratching the back of his head with his now sharpened claws, and looked upon them with light green cat eyes and two black pointy ears with pink inside and a black curved cat tail from behind, wouldn't be surprised if he had a sandpaper tongue, but let's leave that to Sango to find out.

"KAWAII!!!!!!!!!!" Sango twirked Miroku's ears, Inu Yasha's hair rose from the back of his neck, ~cats, I hate cats~ Kagome blinked half opening her eyes to everyone around her.

"MIROKU????" she blinked, her fingers twitched, ~must put prayer beads on his neck~ Kagome caught Miroku putting one over his head,

"Kagome-sama?" he blinked,

"If you will, my goddess." Kagome smirked,

"HENTAI!!!" Sango yelled, Miroku slammed into the ground.

"OW!" Miroku whined.

"YES!!! UP MOST AND TOTAL DOMINANCE IS MINEEEE!!!!" Sango stood valiantly with her fist in the air upon a rock as the sky darkened, with lightening crackling in the background. (a/n: Aren't the special effects we can afford cool?) Sango picked up Miroku's staff, "I wish I was a cat demon!!!"

"Trust me. no you don't.." Kirara sighed, crickets. Gaped open mouths. "Hey I haven't even talked since chapter 1!!!!!" silence. "Fine.. Meow!" she mewed, everyone went back to normal. Miroku's staff glowed,

"AHHH!!! What's going on?" Sango gasped, and then turned into a cat demon, she had black and white ears (patches), pink glowing eyes, with a long tail, claws and fangs to match. "What is this thing?? A magic lamp???"

"No way, then I wanna change!!!" Kagome grabbed Tetsusiaga from its sheath and blinked, "I wish I was a dog demon." She said cautiously. A big poof! And Kagome came out in a forest green kimono like Inu Yasha's only the puffiness of the shirt was limited, but pants were decreased and they went to her knees, white floppy dog eyes were placed on her head, (unlike Inu Yasha's triangular ones) and complimented with glowing blue eyes with fangs and claws.

"Holy shit." Kirara blinked. Silence once again. "MEOW DAMMIT MEOW!!!" back to normal.

"HA!!! Now you really ARE a BITCH!!!!" Inu Yasha laughed. Kagome smiled sweetly at him and walked over wrapping her arms around his waist from behind, "Inu Yasha?" she kissed his neck.

"Uh. **Gulp** yeah.." He turned his head towards her Kagome licked his lips, "KAGOME????" she held him tight, then released stepping back, she took in a deep breath.

"SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!"

To be continued..

A/n: Oooooh, you thought something else didn't you??? Is there more intimate things I should be putting up here, maybe a PG13 or higher chappie rating later? Hmm.. Give me your suggestions. LOL, I think Inu Yasha will be feeling that one for a while, hanyou or not, oh and Sango, Miroku, and Kagome are all Hanyous too.. Just to add that in... Hmm.. What do you guys think??? Should I make the 'private moments' a little more 'lemon- flavored'? OR simply keep it innocent... Did you like the twist in actions by Kagome??? Oh and be sure to add any SPELLING-errors.. Lol joking.. I want about 20-25 reviews for more to keep going.. I need these; they fuel me to type till 4:30 in the morning to fulfill your Inu Yasha humor needs!!!! ~Love Ya! Hime-chan~