This chapter was inspired by Descendent. Check out the fic 'Brotherhood Evolution'. It's a lot of fun!
A Day in the Life of Lockheed: Personal Journal
My humans are so weird.
I never tire of their bizarre antics. Yesterday they nearly burned down the kitchen. And they complain about my fires? I know for a fact that they start ten times more fires than I do!
Still I love my humans, especially Kitty, my favorite. I swear she acts just like a sentient dragon sometimes. I wish she would find more suitable suitors though. I don't approve of either Lance or the big metal guy to be her mate. When she is older I will find her a more suitable companion.
They are odd creatures however. They have this bizarre belief that the entire planet revolves around them. It never occurs to them that I might have a life of my own. Which reminds me, Polly owes me fifty bucks from the poker game the other night. That flying weasel better pay up if he wants his tail feathers in one piece!
Still my humans are often sad because other humans treat them badly because they can do things other humans can't which lets face it is stupid. I mean there are many animals and dragons that do different things and usually we get along pretty well. Unless said animal is part of another animal's food chain. I mean for example horses don't get jealous of birds because they can fly and birds don't get jealous of horses because they can run fast. I know for a fact Polly isn't really jealous of any animal with the exception of this one parakeet but that's because he's sweet on this little parrot Polly likes.
Still humans are lower life forms and I guess you have to be patient with them.
Here is my list of things I must do today:
Inspect my home for predators. Dragons must protect their home! It's our most important job! Train my human Kitty into not taking the paper before I am done reading it.3. Play with Kitty. (Humans need a lot of attention.)
4. Teach those ridiculous male humans not to invade my territory (again!) I swear don't they have any clue what marking is? What do they think I am doing? Making a mess?
5. Get fifty bucks from Polly
6. Snack time
7. Naptime (Raising humans takes a lot out of you.)
8. Afternoon snack time
9. Dinner
10. Dessert
11. Making sure my humans behave themselves and not get into trouble. Sometimes I have to discipline them when they do something wrong by shredding their shoes and sneakers but you have to train them right!
Well I'd better get going. I think the human with the large shiny head is trying to invade my closet again. Sigh, sometimes I wonder why I have so many humans. They are a lot of work.