Authors Note: I don't own any of
the canon that you see here...the plot, hopefully is mine...I don't think I
copied it...Oh yeah, this story contains slash of the major kind, plus
rape/descriptive sexual actions, if you're still interested keep going, if
you're not, leave now and please don't flame me, If you do, I'll just use the
angst that I will feel in reaction to it in this story. Don't fuel
something you hate...
Broken
All my efforts to get warm for
the past two hours proved to be in vain, as I laid
shivering in bed.
I had been told once, by one
person or another, that you get cold when you're tired. When you're too
tired to sleep it's freezing...I have been freezing
for three days. Though I'm so cold, and my eyelids are almost to heavy to hold, I know it has to be better than what I'll
inevitably see if I close my eyes.
I'm tired, cold, hungry and upset, all because of one horrifying night, all
because of one horrifying person. A person who
played my weaknesses like a fiddle, hurt me and humilated
me to the fullest extent. I still can't believe it was only two days
ago. 2 days ago when I would lie awake in bed for another reason.
**2 Days Earlier**
He was beautiful, there was no
denying that, his hair his face, his eyes, his cool demeanor. Everything
about him had gotten me hooked, and I wasn't willing to let go. I was
awake, thinking, fantasizing about him and what it would be like if I was
his. Things would be perfect. I wanted to love him. To have him love me. I wanted to wake up in the
morning smiling, then rushing downstairs to meet
him. As he'd kiss me softly I'd smile and we'd share some type of private
joke before heading off to our respective tables. I wanted to love him.
Becoming restless, I rose out
of bed, and only bothering to put on jeans and my invisibility cloak, I went
out for one of my usual nightly strolls down the corridors. It was a
clear night, with no stars, and it brought a sense of calmness over me. Calmness that took my mind off of him. That is, until
he appeared in front of me.
I let out a loud gasp and he
turned to find the source of the noise, his face inches from mine. I
tried to control my breathing, but that only made it sound louder and more
erratic.
"Potter."
He whispered. "Fancy meeting you here."
I stopped breathing, stopped
inhaling the smell of his hair, his robes, his body, whatever it was that
smelled so good. How did he know it was me?
"M-Malfoy." I stammered as he began pulling my
cloak off of me.
"What do you want?" I
asked him, attempting to sound as menacing as possibe,
but instead sounding girlish and frightened.
He took in a deep
breath. "Nothing. Look, I found
something. Something...really cool.
Can I show you?" He looked at me shyly, pleading in his eyes.
I stared at him dumbfounded that he was both having a civil conversation with
me and that he was offering to take me somewhere. I didn't know what to
do.
"Come on, I won't hurt
you." He finally said, grabbing at my hand and pulling me down the
hall.
After turning at a few
random openings and running through a few places I'd never ventured to, he
stopped me in front of another unfamiliar painting, it was completely black
with something else black moving on top of it. He whispered a word, possibly another language and pulled me into
a room.
I looked in shock at the
black sheets on the black bed, the black walls and the black door.
"What is this?" I
asked.
His voice popped up behind
me, "You'll see." And with that he grabbed me around the waist
from behind.
** **
It's almost too much to think
about, the details. But think about it I do. Now, more than ever,
he fills every one of my thoughts and every one of my dreams. My dream, to get as far away from him as possible. He
hurt me so bad. I turn to my side and sigh, trying to think of something nuetral to fall asleep on. I feel a tap on my
shoulder and I jump, scared to death.
"Hey, Harry, are you
alright?" It was Seamus.
"I'm fine
Seamus." He looked at me wearily, and got back in his own bed.
Yes Seamus, I'm fine. So fine that just someone tapping on my shoulder can remind of that
nightmare. All I wanted was him to love me. All I wanted was
to have him speak to me softly and teach me how to love. Nothing about
this was loving or soft. I broke into sobs and I knew that all the other
boys in my dormitory were watching me.
** **
I shrieked as he threw me
up against the wall, and immediately smashed his lips on to mine. I tried
to break free, I tried to stop him and ask him what was going on but he pinned
me down.
"This is what you
wanted, right Harry?" I blinked. He was right. This is what I
had been wanting all along, and he had just called me Harry. So I slipped
my fingers in his hair and kissed him for all I was worth. It was more
than I ever could have wanted, so soft and so amazing. I opened my mouth
only slightly to allow his tongue entry and he moaned into the
kiss. How amazing it is to have your dreams come true, even if it's
only for a second. He moved his face down into my neck and after a quick
kiss from him and a gasp from me he looked into my eyes.
"Malfoy"
I said breathlessly.
"Let's not waste time
Harry" he said, and with a quick swish of his wand I was completely
stripped of all my clothing.
"Didn't
want that to get in the way." He said, smirking. He
took off his t-shirt and led me over to the bed. "Lay down." He
commanded, and suddenly I realized that it wouldn't be the sweet love session I
had been planning in my head, but I didn't care. I laid
down on the bed and he crawled over me, straddling my hips.
"You'll like
this." he informed me, and then proceeded to attach my arms to the
headboard and my feet to the bedposts with another swish of his wand.
"Draco?"
I asked him nervously. He put a finger to his lips and then bent over my
lap. He ran his tongue along my length slowly, causing me to
shudder. I nearly cried out, but remembering his commands to be quiet, I
bit my cheek instead. He tipped his head up to smirk at me and then
enveloped me into the warm depths of his mouth. I gasped quietly, and
then as I cursed myself for making any type of indication that I felt what was
happening, he took his mouth away and gave me a look I'd never forget.
Draco unbuttoned his pants and slid them off his
naked thighs. With a predatory glint in his eyes he lifted my legs and
leaned forward.
"This is the fun
part." He said, before roughly shoving himself inside me. I was
immediately filled with intense pain that surged throughout my body. I
cried out in surprise and pain, but still, nothing seemed to faze him. He
pressed himself in and out quickly, throwing his head back in pleasure and
crying out random words. Tears stung my eyes and I swallowed sobs as the
searing pain hit me over and over again. Just as I felt as though I would
die from the emotional and physical pain Draco
exploded into me and with one last cry from him he pulled out.
I kept my eyes shut tight,
and I knew he was staring down at me.
"Potter."
He said breathlessly. I kept quiet. I kept my mouth and eyes shut
and soon my body was bieng coated in Draco's saliva. Through my tears I gasped
again. Not wanting his ministrations to feel good, but bieng powerless against my reactions. He licked and
sucked every piece of me that could be taken in, and then as suddenly as he had
started, he stopped. He rebound my ankles to the bedpost and as I feared
that he would hurt me again, he redressed himself and walked out of the room,
but not before looking at me wickedly and winking in my direction.
** **
I continue to bury my
anguished sobs into my pillow and I hear someones bed
curtains opening, then mine.
"Harry." Said a pleading voice. "Harry, please tell me
what's wrong." I sat still, trying unsuccesfully
to silence my cries. "Harry?" a
hand reached to my head and stroked my hair, and a weight pressed down on the
edge of my bed. A tall redhead leaned his face near mine and turned my
head to face him. Though I tried to avoid it, I had no choice but to look
at his eyes and I could see that there were tears there too.
"Talk to me,
please." He said.
"I c-can't, Ron."
I choked out between sobs and hiccups.
"I want to help!"
He nearly yelled to me, tears slipping down his cheeks as well.
I shook my head and buried
my face back into my pillow. Ron sat, unmoving, for a long time before I
passed out from my pain.
** **
Un-ending pain,
humiliation, anger, desperation and even worse, loneliness. I
stared in shock at the ceiling because of what had happened to me. I had
gotten what I wanted. He told me it was what I wanted, and who was I to argue. No tears could come, because as I kept
telling myself, this had been my doing. I had wanted this to
happen. I walked out of the common room in hopes of finding him, I had kissed him in hopes of making love to him.
Things had turned wrong, and I was to blame. He had done nothing
wrong. Draco can do no wrong.
After I had been lying
there for hours, shivering without my clothes and digging myself deeper into a
well of self pity, the binds disappeared and I was free to sit up, rubbing at
my wrists.
Slowly, feeling the pain
in each step, I walked over to my discarded clothing and returned them to my
body. Covering myself with my cloak I walked out through the portrait and
ventured back to my house, never stopping to look back.
-----End of Chapter 1-----
Teaser- "I've been wanting to tell you for so
long but I didn't know how." He hugged me and I stared in shock at
the person who had broken me only a few days prior.
"Don't do this." I said weakly, knowing all too well that I had
no power to stop him.
"Don't do what?" He asked, looking puzzled. "Harry I'm in
love with you."
"You can't be." I said, feeling myself grow faint. "No, not
after what you did..."
"After I did what? Harry, what are you
talking about? Do you hear what I'm saying?"
Hope You liked it. Please review. Or if you really wanna talk email me at jayd5187@aol.com