Disclaimer: As usual, I don't own BttF. Not even the DVD. 2 of the
questions were from classmates, another from a class notice board and one
more from Bill and Ted. The rest are mine. This fic is dedicated to J-Flux,
who for some reason has stopped writing.
Back to the Future: The Weakest Link
Jaina McFly: Hello everybody and welcome to the BTTF edition of The Weakest Link!
(Applause)
JM: Today we have here 8 contestants who will be playing the game in hopes of winning the grand prize of... (Drum roll) ONE MILLION CENTS! Or, in other words, $10,000.
Audience: Oooooh...
JM: For those people who have no idea what TWL is, go watch the show, and for those people who haven't watched BTTF, go watch it too. If you don't know who I am, I'm the alter ego of Anakin McFly, who is currently too overwhelmed by homework and band practice to do anything but sleep and write stuff like this. Anyway, the contestants for today are, in alphabetical order, Biff, Clara, Doc, George, Jennifer, Lorraine, Marty and a miscellaneous representative of the Hill Valley Toilet Committee.
(Audience applaud the HVTC rep, who waves and gives out autographs.)
JM: Ok, we can skip the introductions. If you don't know who those people are, as I said, go watch the show. Universal Studios better be paying me for this. In the case of the HVTC rep, you probably won't know him, so I'll give him some time to introduce himself.
(Spotlight moves over to the HVTC rep.)
HVTC rep: Hi everybody! My name is 'Ted' Theodore Logan and I work in the Hill Valley Toilet Committee. For this year, our vision is to have the cleanest toilets in the world, so party on, dudes!
Audience: EXCELLENT!
JM: On to the show...you all should know the rules, so we can start. Just take note, however, that to bank money you have to say the following phrase: "Some crazy driver wearing Nike shoes just crashed my brand new Mercedes Benz in his weird looking DeLorean going at the speed of 87 mph and I demand compensation."
Marty: Huh?
(JM repeats herself)
JM: Got it?
Contestants: Yup.
JM: Yay! On to the questions! We'll begin with Biff, as his name comes first alphabetically. Start the clock. Biff, as stickmen don't wear clothes, are they considered pornographic?
B: Of course!
JM: Right. Clara, if the male of a goose is called a gander, is the male of a moose called Amanda?
C: Yup!
JM: Correct. Doc, what do you call someone who breaks wind?
D: A windbreaker!
JM: Yes! George, what is the Matrix?
G: No one can tell you what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself.
JM: Uh...yeah. Jennifer, why do all the years the DeLorean go to end with a '5'?
J: That's just the way it is.
JM: Yup. Lorraine, were KIA vehicles Killed In Action?
L: I think so.
JM: Correct! Man, you guys are good. Marty, who is shorter, you or Luke Skywalker?
M: LUKE! DEFINITELY!
JM: Er, the answer was 'I don't know'.
M: Aw, man!
JM: Ted, if you have one piece of advice to give to the world, what would it be?
T: PARTY ON, DUDES!
Audience: EXCELLENT!
M: What kind of question is that?
JM: A good one. Back to you, Biff.
B: Some crazy driver wearing Nike shoes...
(Jaina starts whistling the BttF theme song)
B: ...Mercedes Benz in his weird...
Timer: Teet!
B: #@$!
JM: Times up! It's now time to vote off The Weakest Link!
Miscellaneous voice from somewhere: With one question wrong, Marty is the weakest link. Everyone else is the strongest link. Let's see who gets kicked out...
JM: We shall now go for a short but irritating commercial break, and when we come back, we'll see who each person voted for. Hang on there, and hands off that remote. Thanks.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Back to the Future: The Weakest Link
Jaina McFly: Hello everybody and welcome to the BTTF edition of The Weakest Link!
(Applause)
JM: Today we have here 8 contestants who will be playing the game in hopes of winning the grand prize of... (Drum roll) ONE MILLION CENTS! Or, in other words, $10,000.
Audience: Oooooh...
JM: For those people who have no idea what TWL is, go watch the show, and for those people who haven't watched BTTF, go watch it too. If you don't know who I am, I'm the alter ego of Anakin McFly, who is currently too overwhelmed by homework and band practice to do anything but sleep and write stuff like this. Anyway, the contestants for today are, in alphabetical order, Biff, Clara, Doc, George, Jennifer, Lorraine, Marty and a miscellaneous representative of the Hill Valley Toilet Committee.
(Audience applaud the HVTC rep, who waves and gives out autographs.)
JM: Ok, we can skip the introductions. If you don't know who those people are, as I said, go watch the show. Universal Studios better be paying me for this. In the case of the HVTC rep, you probably won't know him, so I'll give him some time to introduce himself.
(Spotlight moves over to the HVTC rep.)
HVTC rep: Hi everybody! My name is 'Ted' Theodore Logan and I work in the Hill Valley Toilet Committee. For this year, our vision is to have the cleanest toilets in the world, so party on, dudes!
Audience: EXCELLENT!
JM: On to the show...you all should know the rules, so we can start. Just take note, however, that to bank money you have to say the following phrase: "Some crazy driver wearing Nike shoes just crashed my brand new Mercedes Benz in his weird looking DeLorean going at the speed of 87 mph and I demand compensation."
Marty: Huh?
(JM repeats herself)
JM: Got it?
Contestants: Yup.
JM: Yay! On to the questions! We'll begin with Biff, as his name comes first alphabetically. Start the clock. Biff, as stickmen don't wear clothes, are they considered pornographic?
B: Of course!
JM: Right. Clara, if the male of a goose is called a gander, is the male of a moose called Amanda?
C: Yup!
JM: Correct. Doc, what do you call someone who breaks wind?
D: A windbreaker!
JM: Yes! George, what is the Matrix?
G: No one can tell you what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself.
JM: Uh...yeah. Jennifer, why do all the years the DeLorean go to end with a '5'?
J: That's just the way it is.
JM: Yup. Lorraine, were KIA vehicles Killed In Action?
L: I think so.
JM: Correct! Man, you guys are good. Marty, who is shorter, you or Luke Skywalker?
M: LUKE! DEFINITELY!
JM: Er, the answer was 'I don't know'.
M: Aw, man!
JM: Ted, if you have one piece of advice to give to the world, what would it be?
T: PARTY ON, DUDES!
Audience: EXCELLENT!
M: What kind of question is that?
JM: A good one. Back to you, Biff.
B: Some crazy driver wearing Nike shoes...
(Jaina starts whistling the BttF theme song)
B: ...Mercedes Benz in his weird...
Timer: Teet!
B: #@$!
JM: Times up! It's now time to vote off The Weakest Link!
Miscellaneous voice from somewhere: With one question wrong, Marty is the weakest link. Everyone else is the strongest link. Let's see who gets kicked out...
JM: We shall now go for a short but irritating commercial break, and when we come back, we'll see who each person voted for. Hang on there, and hands off that remote. Thanks.
TO BE CONTINUED...