"Don't let it get you. The pull of society is strong, but your will of
nonconformity must be stronger. Don't you know that?"
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
It's hard. Too go against everything that was taught to you. A girl grows up and becomes a woman. Women want to fall in love and get married.
When I was little, this wasn't hard at all. I blindly followed a shadow that I couldn't see. Thinking in my mind that some noble prince had saved me. My memory skewed. And now I begin to wonder...if I had remembered that day clearly. Remembered how cruel the prince was, remembered how hurt the girl was...the true reason I wanted to become a prince...would all this have happened. Would I have been led on so easily and used by my weakness.
The simple wants and insecurities of a female are weakness. They get in the way...they were the death of me.
When I was young, my mission was clear. Become a prince. But just as Dios had said...I eventually became a woman. And women are all trained to sit waiting for that prince...to be a princess.
And I became blind. Blind to my goal. Blind to myself. No matter how much I wanted to become a prince, they told me I shouldn't...a princess I was meant to be. Why? Why were they trying to change me? Since the day I met Dios and he showed me that girl doomed to live forever in pain...
'Please! Help her!'
'I can do nothing for her now. She needs a new prince to save her.'
'Then I'll do it! I'll grow up and become a prince and save that girl!'
'But you can't...you're a girl.'
No. That's where Dios was wrong. That's where Touga was wrong. And that's where Akio was wrong. I am not a girl. And they are not princes. Maybe once before... long ago, they were princes, for other women. But those men sought to rule over princesses. They were not princes for long. Corrupt and dead to this world, but nothing more. I am the prince.
'I'll become a prince and save her!'
'But you can't...you're a girl.'
No. That's where you were wrong.
'It may seem simple now, but girls become women and women become princesses.'
No. That's where you were wrong.
'Just a girl.'
No.
'Swords are not meant for you.'
No.
'I think a dress suits you much better.'
No, I think you're wrong.
'But you can't...you're just a GIRL.'
That's where you are all wrong. I am not JUST a girl. I am a revolutionary girl! I am a prince. The prince. To be 'just a girl' is weakness, but I am no girl. I am more of a prince then any of you shall ever be. I saved Anthy! Maybe not as well as I would have hoped...but I gave my life to her. And looking back, I never could have done that for any "prince." I gave my life to my bride, to my fiancé, to my princess...to eternity...
But now, I am lost. Lost and alone without my princess. A prince should never be without her princess. But this new world is different. It's open and free and full of beauty. It's everything I want to share with Anthy. But where is she?
Revolution...miracles, memories, something that shines, and eternity...
So many versions of the same goal. But did anyone ever truly see? Did anyone ever know...that it was right under their noses?
The miracle of the witch being saved from her hell, the memories deep inside of me-truly of her, the beauty of what shines between us, the thing that saved that girl from the coffin one day was a vision of her eternity, and my revolution...was her...
Anthy was the miracle.
Anthy was the memory.
Anthy was that thing that shone.
Anthy was eternity.
Anthy was the revolution!
But now...where is Anthy?
I sit here now, the clouds slowly drifting over the streets. This new place, already inhabited? Or is it that it is now inhabited because I am here. The prince of this world. Will I become corrupt too?
No. That is where I am wrong.
The trees gave me shade as I sat on the cool grass. The breeze blowing my free salmon hair about. Imagining a beautiful dark skinned woman to my right, violet hair coursing down her back.
But where is she?
The people go on, walk by. They can't even imagine what I've done. Or what's gone on. Can it be? Can it be that this is heaven? Or is it truly that I have created this new world, filled only with the people who-like me- have died but-unlike me-could not go on. I have saved these people. I have saved them from their painful slumber. And here lies a new world. But where is it? How far is it from Ohtori? Could I ever get back? Would I want to go back? Where's Anthy? Has she stayed there? Back with Akio? Back at Ohtori! NO! Anthy! You can't!
Tears slowly role down my red cheeks as I pray for my princess to come for me. Trapped here in this new world I have made. I know she can find me. She just has to! Maybe they were right...I do need a prince...but in a new form...She is miracle, memory, the thing that shines, eternity, Revolution! Therefore...she would be revolutionary...
I can only hope. But what if I'm wrong about all of this. What if she did stay with Akio in Ohtori? What if she never cared or never loved or never...ANTHY!!!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Wrong again Miss Utena. I am coming for you, my prince..."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
It's hard. Too go against everything that was taught to you. A girl grows up and becomes a woman. Women want to fall in love and get married.
When I was little, this wasn't hard at all. I blindly followed a shadow that I couldn't see. Thinking in my mind that some noble prince had saved me. My memory skewed. And now I begin to wonder...if I had remembered that day clearly. Remembered how cruel the prince was, remembered how hurt the girl was...the true reason I wanted to become a prince...would all this have happened. Would I have been led on so easily and used by my weakness.
The simple wants and insecurities of a female are weakness. They get in the way...they were the death of me.
When I was young, my mission was clear. Become a prince. But just as Dios had said...I eventually became a woman. And women are all trained to sit waiting for that prince...to be a princess.
And I became blind. Blind to my goal. Blind to myself. No matter how much I wanted to become a prince, they told me I shouldn't...a princess I was meant to be. Why? Why were they trying to change me? Since the day I met Dios and he showed me that girl doomed to live forever in pain...
'Please! Help her!'
'I can do nothing for her now. She needs a new prince to save her.'
'Then I'll do it! I'll grow up and become a prince and save that girl!'
'But you can't...you're a girl.'
No. That's where Dios was wrong. That's where Touga was wrong. And that's where Akio was wrong. I am not a girl. And they are not princes. Maybe once before... long ago, they were princes, for other women. But those men sought to rule over princesses. They were not princes for long. Corrupt and dead to this world, but nothing more. I am the prince.
'I'll become a prince and save her!'
'But you can't...you're a girl.'
No. That's where you were wrong.
'It may seem simple now, but girls become women and women become princesses.'
No. That's where you were wrong.
'Just a girl.'
No.
'Swords are not meant for you.'
No.
'I think a dress suits you much better.'
No, I think you're wrong.
'But you can't...you're just a GIRL.'
That's where you are all wrong. I am not JUST a girl. I am a revolutionary girl! I am a prince. The prince. To be 'just a girl' is weakness, but I am no girl. I am more of a prince then any of you shall ever be. I saved Anthy! Maybe not as well as I would have hoped...but I gave my life to her. And looking back, I never could have done that for any "prince." I gave my life to my bride, to my fiancé, to my princess...to eternity...
But now, I am lost. Lost and alone without my princess. A prince should never be without her princess. But this new world is different. It's open and free and full of beauty. It's everything I want to share with Anthy. But where is she?
Revolution...miracles, memories, something that shines, and eternity...
So many versions of the same goal. But did anyone ever truly see? Did anyone ever know...that it was right under their noses?
The miracle of the witch being saved from her hell, the memories deep inside of me-truly of her, the beauty of what shines between us, the thing that saved that girl from the coffin one day was a vision of her eternity, and my revolution...was her...
Anthy was the miracle.
Anthy was the memory.
Anthy was that thing that shone.
Anthy was eternity.
Anthy was the revolution!
But now...where is Anthy?
I sit here now, the clouds slowly drifting over the streets. This new place, already inhabited? Or is it that it is now inhabited because I am here. The prince of this world. Will I become corrupt too?
No. That is where I am wrong.
The trees gave me shade as I sat on the cool grass. The breeze blowing my free salmon hair about. Imagining a beautiful dark skinned woman to my right, violet hair coursing down her back.
But where is she?
The people go on, walk by. They can't even imagine what I've done. Or what's gone on. Can it be? Can it be that this is heaven? Or is it truly that I have created this new world, filled only with the people who-like me- have died but-unlike me-could not go on. I have saved these people. I have saved them from their painful slumber. And here lies a new world. But where is it? How far is it from Ohtori? Could I ever get back? Would I want to go back? Where's Anthy? Has she stayed there? Back with Akio? Back at Ohtori! NO! Anthy! You can't!
Tears slowly role down my red cheeks as I pray for my princess to come for me. Trapped here in this new world I have made. I know she can find me. She just has to! Maybe they were right...I do need a prince...but in a new form...She is miracle, memory, the thing that shines, eternity, Revolution! Therefore...she would be revolutionary...
I can only hope. But what if I'm wrong about all of this. What if she did stay with Akio in Ohtori? What if she never cared or never loved or never...ANTHY!!!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Wrong again Miss Utena. I am coming for you, my prince..."