The next day, Mother tried to keep me in. She said I was becoming a young lady, and it was inappropiate to keep running around the gardens. Of course, I see now that she was right, but back then I didn't.
"Dolores," I remember her saying suddenly "You're not going in the forest, are you?"
"No," I said carefully.
"You know you're forbidden, don't you?"
"Yes."
"Good."
And then I ran out and went into the forest.
*****
I found Parath quickly. I'd gotten better at finding him in the forest, which I thought was quite odd. Still, I didn't think about it any more than that. Especially since when I found him, he was carving something on a tree, and he didn't even turn around when I approached. I wondered if I should clear my throat loudly or something to get him to notice me...but I didn't.
A few minutes later he did turn, and he didn't actually look annoyed or cross...I'd expected him too. Maybe he'd got used to me or decided to put up with me or...something.
"What were you doing?" I asked quietly.
He was silent for a few more seconds and then decided to tell me. "My wife...Malrie and Rinlen's mother...she was killed several years ago. She is buried beside this tree. Every year on the annivarsary of her death...I write on this tree. To tell her how the children and I are doing."
A lump grew unbidden in my throat. I leaned over to look at the tree. I couldn't read it.
"It's old centaur language," Parath informed me. "I don't speak it usually. I'm not good at it. But Emanzi was." I guessed Emanzi was his wife. "Very few humans can speak it. I don't imagine you can."
"No," I said, shaking my head. "Did you write...anything about me?"
A shadow crossed his face. "No," he said shortly.
I suddenly thought of something, but I didn't know if I should say it. I thought about it for a second. "Parath...if you don't mind me asking...who...killed her?"
His dark eyes fixed on me. "You know who. Don't you?"
Yes. I did. "Humans...us. Me, I mean."
"Not you," he said. "You haven't killed anyone. Just your kind. Dolores...if you sit down, I will tell you the whole story."
I realised that he used my name. I sat down on a log. "Tell me."
He nodded, pulled another log over to be opposite mine, sat down on it...well, sort of sat down, sort of kneeled..he was a centaur after all and they can't sit down like us...and looked me in the eyes.
"There used to be life in this forest," he said, and suddenly the forest was full of life. Fresh air and colours and...people. (Not people. Centaurs!) Just...being alive. Talking. Making things. Playing music. Being things...
(How silly.)
"There were a great deal of centaurs in this forest then. Not just three. We lived in peace and happiness...until one night came. It was winter and cold and dark and raining. The sort of night in which things like that happen." He gave a rueful smile.
"Men. Men with wands. They didn't use your Avada Kedavra spell. They used other spells...messier ones. Crueller ones. All I heard that night was screaming." His eyes were not closed. "Emanzi and I...I don't know how we escaped. She was pregnant with Rinlen. We ran through the night as fast as we could...occasionally stumbling over the body of a friend. I don't know why...but when morning came, we were still alive."
I realised that at some point, I had clapped my hand over my mouth. I removed it.
"After that...well, the night after that some more people came back. But there were less of them, and they weren't looking for murder this time. They just gathered up all the bodies, and burnt them." I could almost see the flames in his eyes. "They didn't come back. Not for years. Rinlen was born and later Malrie was born. And then..." Against my will, my stomach swirled. "They started to suspect there were still centaurs in the forest. They killed in a quieter way now. They simply took the body of an animal we like to eat, laced it with poison and dumped it in the forest. Emanzi found it. She ate only a little, but it was enough to kill her slowly and painfully. I told the children she was dying of an illness, but I didn't say the illness came from human's poison."
My mind spun and I picked the first vaguely sensible-sounding thing out of it. "Rinlen suspects something, doesn't he?"
"I think so. I still haven't told the children all the details of their mother's death. I'm not sure if I ever will."
"If you did, they'd stop talking to and playing with me..."
"Yes," He looked very long and hard at me. "I don't know where or why you got this notion that we would be your friends, but perhaps it wasn't entirely foolish. I just hope you know that friendship works both ways."
"I do," I said.
"I hope so."
Then we both turned and went our seperate ways.
*****
I couldn't sleep that night. I don't know why. Eventually, very early in the morning, I crept out of my room. I tiptoed past Victoria's room...and she jumped out at me, giving me the fright of my life.
"What on earth are you doing?"
"I couldn't sleep."
"You woke me up!"
"Sorry..." I muttered, and turned around.
"You shouldn't be walking around in the middle of the night!"
"I said sorry."
"You disturbed my beauty sleep! I need it."
I glanced up at her. "Yes, you do."
She glared and then, being very childish, yanked a lock of my hair.
"Ow!"
"Brat," she muttered, and went back to bed. I went back to my own.
You understand why I didn't love her, don't you?