*Reposted in HTML format*
Hello! The tenth chapter is already up! I'm happy about that! Are you happy about it…? I hope you are! Well, anyway read and review… If you've seen my BIO you know I'm an alien from the Netherlands, and due to that I live on REVIEWS instead of bread, water and love! Alright, stupid joke... But DO review and maybe the title may make a bit sense after this chapter... But not much! This chapter is a songfic again. The first song used is One Step Closer and the second In The End, both by Linkin Park. I found out that the lyrics are neither italic nor coloured. I think I'll put them between ~~ now.
*Not in HTML, it'll just be italic*
Final Breakdowns and Still Doubting
Chapter 10
"I think you are… You are still in love with her... Still... after all she did to you... I think your heart can't let her go... That's what I think..."
I cannot take this anymore
"Of course I can let her go! I hated her! She was the one that nailed me to the Goshinboku for fifty years! Of course my heart can let her go!"
I'm saying everything I've said before
"Geez, Inu-ko! Just tell her that you love the Kikyo-girl so everyone will live a happily ever after... Well, for me it is..."
All these words they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
"Kouga! I'd never tell her that! Because-"
"Because I have to locate the last shards and purify the whole thing! Inuyasha, please tell me now why I'm still here…"
Less I hear the less you'll say
"I need you! You can't just go away!"
But you'll find that out anyway
"I'm still Kikyo for you, ne? I still am her... I ain't her, Inuyasha. I never will be her. I never want to be her… Except for sometimes... When you, when you…"
Just like before…
"What, Kagome? I don't see you as Kikyo. She's dead, she's gone!"
Everything you say to me
"And I will be gone sometime soon too! Nice world then, ne?"
Takes me one step closer to the edge
"Kagome! What are you saying! The world's better with you in it!"
"But still much less than when Kikyo was in it…"
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
"Whoah... What are you all talking about! This is WAY out of my knowledge..."
"That's because you don't have any brains, Kouga!"
"Kouga… Would you please give me your shards… I'd be home quicker that way…"
'Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
"You wanna go home so bad?"
"At this time... Yeah, actually, I do. Give me a reason why I should stay any longer- and don't say you need me, 'cause I know that you need me for the shards."
"You should stay... because...What do you think Shippo, Sango and Miroku will feel when you go forever, without a real reason?"
I find the answers aren't so clear
I wish I could find a way to disappear
"They don't feel anything like that, because I HAVE a good reason for going!"
"Tell me that reason then, Kagome…"
"Yeah, why shouldn't you leave the puppy and live with me instead!"
"Kouga... You make me sick, you know..."
"Anyways... I can't tell you my main reason... You guys wouldn't understand..."
All these thoughts they make no sense
I find bliss in ignorance
"Now THAT is the stupidest thing I ever heard!"
"Inuyasha, you can't assure you'd understand. In fact, I think you just wouldn't understand me. You didn't even understand me when I told you why I didn't want you to kill Kouga, that way…"
"She just likes me, Inu-ko. Get over it!"
"Kouga, just give me your shards and get lost!" a very angry Kagome said… -_-#
Nothing seems to go away
"I ain't givin' up my shards!"
Over and over again
"Inuyasha… Would you understand? Would you? I don't think so, ne? It's true…"
"What's true? I don't get it!"
"I now know why Kikyo could get such a grudge against you. I won't let that happen to me, but... I can see why, it's not that hard... It's more difficult not to get one... "
"What the... What do you mean? You... You understand why Kikyo wanted to kill me?! What is it that bothers you so much about me?"
"It's your attitude! Not telling anything to a woman, but still assuming she stays with you, no matter what! That isn't really fair, is it?"
"Never tell anything to a woman? What should I tell the bitch then? Which type of youkai I hate most?"
"Inuyasha! I've totally had it with you! You really expect me to stay with you, after you tell me what a bitch, wench, whore or stupid baka I am?! You think I just should get used to that?! What do you think I am? Some kind of thing which you can command? You aren't being realistic Inuyasha! Hasn't anyone ever taught you some manners?"
Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to break
I need a little room to breathe
'Cause I'm one step closer to the edge
And I'm about to
Break
"Ka… Kagome... "
"Now it's you who's trying to soothe me with the 'sweet eyes'! You think you can make me stay if you're nice to me sometimes! -Just make her happy for the moment, so she doesn't run off!- That's what I… I really, really HATE that about you!"
*You really hate that about me... Don't you hate everything about me? Actually you do so... But I really don't get what you're trying to say... I am nice to you sometimes, ne? You should be happy about that… What do you want more from me…"
"But you ain't nice to me everyday! What do you do with this rosary, for example! You just-"
It starts with…
"SIT me! Yeah, you know why I do that? Because else I wouldn't have any power against you and you'd just make me stay! What do you think people at my time will think? I'd be a missing person, or a runaway-child! And my life here... I can't do anything with my life HERE! I can't go to college, I can't get the job I'd want to! I'd just be a... a stupid PRIESTESS! Do you think I'd like that?"
One thing I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
"Why not?" he muffled in the dirt.
"I'm going, Inuyasha! Win the stupid fight with Kouga, I don't care! Just get of my back and let me be!"
Time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
"Kagome! Wait! You wouldn't survive if you go home by yourself! You know how far it is from here to the well? You'd starve to death and if you didn't, all sorts of youkai would rip you apart!"
It's so unreal
"What if I don't want to survive, Inuyasha? What if I think it's better to give my miserable life up? What if I don't feel like living anymore?"
Didn't look out below
Watch the time go right out of the window
Trying to hold on but didn't even know
We wasted it all just to see you go
"That's a cowardly thing to do!"
"I knew it... The last thing you'd tell me is that I am a coward! But this time you might be right! I am a coward, I'm running away for obvious facts! My life in my time is not of any value too, I mean, if it was I wouldn't spend all my time here!"
I kept everything inside
And even thought I tried
It all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory
Of the time when…
"Your life means a lot just by that! Why do you think you can travel in time? Because you are special! You are destined to be here, to help me, to make the world in this time a better place!"
"Travel in time?!" said a very puzzled Kouga, who was still standing there...
"Well, I just don't wanna be destined anymore, Inuyasha... You just don't wanna see... You can't see beyond yourself... It's only you ya think of..."
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end it doesn't even matter
I had to fall
And lose it all
But in the end it doesn't even matter
*Of course not... I think about you every second... Please don't go!*
"Please don't go, Kagome…"
"We already had this discussion, Inuyasha... I can't stay here if you aren't willing to change your attitude… That would break me apart, I can't let that happen! If got a life beyond you, you know!"
In spite of the way you where mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I'm surprised I got so far
"Yeah… Your sweetie-sweet Hoho-boy, ne?"
"Hojo-kun is just some boy who thinks I like him! I told you that, ne? I thought you said you'd listen! Apparently, you didn't... I should never have thought you would..."
"I did listen! I did!"
Things aren't the way they were before
You wouldn't even recognise me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me in the end
"Not bad enough, if you don't even know that anymore... You really are simple-minded..."
"Fine then! Go and die out there! You just go on about me, ne? Who are you comparing me to? I'm not from your time, I didn't have any family or friends that could tell me anything about how to behave! I just fought myself out of anyone that had a problem with me! I don't know why I let you live in the first place, 'cause it seems you've got the biggest problem of all!"
I put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
But for all this there's only one thing you should know
"Inuyasha… You can be so rude and cold-hearted to me..." Kagome said with tears in her eyes.
*Me? I just do what I think is best! What am I supposed to do if you don't wanna live anymore! I can't help it, can I? YOU are the one who's thinking inside your head, not me!*
"Kagome... What do you expect from me then? In this time it's not as nice and happy as in your time, here it's all war and violence. I'm a nice guy for this time!"
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end it doesn't even matter
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end it doesn't even matter
"But why can't you just... WHY can't you be a bit nicer to me... It's always 'Wench, do this, Bitch, get me that!' That is really frustrating you know... Sometimes I'd wish I was Kikyo... Maybe you wouldn't yell at me like that then..."
"If I'd... If I'd promise that I'll try to be nicer to you, would you stay than?"
"Maybe... But what's nice for you?"
"I won't call you wench again, okay?"
*Please stay alive... You don't now how much you mean to me...*
"No more bitch too?" she asked a bit cheered up.
"No more bitch, alright? Then let's finish this sneaky Kouga, who apparently still tries to understand what we are saying here! Why the HELL are you still here!!!"
"Kouga-kun... I'll ask you nicely one more time, okay? And consider your answer... Give me your shards now, or die!"
*Geez... Still the nice Kagome, ne? Well, should get used to it, I guess...*
"But... But you are my woman! You can't tell me to do anything!"
"I'm not your woman! Besides, if I were your woman, you'd do what I'd say! I'm telling you to give your shards, Kouga! Give 'em up!"
*What the- I didn't know you could be like that... WOW... Better watch out... Don't wanna get such a Kagome in a fight with me... My face hurts only by the thought of it... AUCH!*
"Why should I give 'em up? I could still fight, and not die, ne?"
"You can't. Inuyasha is a million times stronger then you are, you know. You shouldn't get him mad, because this time I won't let you escape. Get my point?"
"Inuyasha isn't a million times stronger! And how should you know? You don't know how strong I am!"
"You're only good at hiding, with those shards in your legs you're only fast. Maybe you should take a real fight for a time. You could learn from it, although I don't think you can use the knowledge afterwards... "
"Oww, come on! Why do you need my shards so bad! And besides, you should consider staying with me… That'd really do you good."
"But it would only make you die a bit slower. You know, Inuyasha wouldn't just let me go off to you, what do you think he is? Someone who lets you take HIS girl from the future? Don't think so, ne?"
*MY girl from the future? But... She's MY Kagome and that wimpy Kouga can't take her from me!*
"I'm not giving my shards! And by the way, what is this 'girl-of-the- future' thing all about! You're just wearing weird clothes, you ain't from the future, right?"
"Of course I am! And I love to stay here, it's a pity I don't have much time, so give the shards!"
"Kagome, he isn't giving them. Better get some fight going, or we'll starve at the way back to Kaede's…"
"Oops, I almost forgot! Inuyasha, maybe it is better to put on a fight after all. I'm starving already! Kouga, last chance, or Inuyasha will slice you. Maybe it's better if you just give the shards now…"
"And why should I-" Kouga began, but got the blade of the transformed Tessaiga right under his nose…
"Give 'em up, Kouga." he growled.
*Why is this taking so long! I could've killed the guy in 5 seconds…*
"But… I'd better get going!" Kouga said, and tried to get away, but Inuyasha got after him and fired the Kaze no Kizu at him. Strange enough Kouga wasn't totally destroyed by it.
"Kouga! Are you alright?"
"Are you alright?! What's this about, Kagome! Get his shards and let's get out of here!"
"I only threatened him to get sliced by you, you didn't have to do that for real!"
~SWEATDROP~
"THE GUY WAS GETTING AWAY! WHAT SHOULD I'VE DONE THEN?!!!!!"
"Inuyasha! SIT!!!"
~BAF~
"What was that for!!!"
"'Cause Kouga is dying, you idiot! You shouldn't have hurt him that bad! Now I've got regrets taking his shards..."
"Why in HELL is that?!"
~*~
Yeah, why the hell would that be??? Read the next chapter when I've posted it! Oww, and in this chapter I think Kagome isn't really the personality Rumiko Takahashi made, but more like me. I don't know, but it's the way I'd think, actually… But if it doesn't bother you nice, cool readers I don't think I have to make a big deal out of it. Just forget I ever said that, okay… And I hope the three dots work, I haven't checked on 'em... If there still is a weird sentence there are two possibilities: Or I have forgotten to change them or it's still no use...
*Again, all of this doesn't matter anymore, 'cause it's posted again in HTML. Again I made the stuff readable and I corrected some minor spelling. Story still the same*