*Again, posted again in HTML so it's easier to read*
YAY! I love you all, and I love my eleven chapters! I didn't know it would go so fast, but I think the twelfth chapter will be the last that I already wrote. From then I'll have to think of the story in chapters (these chapters were actually one story) and they might get better in cliffhangers and stuff. And as you all know by now, I need your opinion about how to go on. But this is al about the twelfth chapter that isn't even here, so don't bother and read this chapter! (REVIEWS PLEASE!!!)
Final Breakdowns and Still Doubting
Chapter 11
"Why in the HELL is that?!"
"Because he might die if I take his shards out! I don't wanna be responsible for his death!"
"I do wanna be! I'll get them if your stupid conscious is bothering you... Geez!"
"Inuyasha... Don't you care..."
"You didn't care about Kikyo, so stop asking me things like that!" Inuyasha said, a bit harsh.
"... Inuyasha..."
"Kagome, where the hell has the bastard hid his shards?"
"In... In his legs they are right above his knees... and… in his right arm between his hand and his elbow… " she said, shivering lightly.
"What is it, Kagome? Why are you shivering like that?"
"Oww... It's just... If he died instantly I wouldn't have such feelings... but now he's still alive... and I don't know if he will live without the shards... Then it feels as if I'd kill him behind his back, you know... "
"But he was gonna die one way or another. Why are you feeling so guilty about this?" he said, while he found one shard in Kouga's leg.
"It's just... I don't know. I actually really have no idea... Rather stupid, ne?"
"Actually, yeah... "
"Oww! You're supposed to tell me- never mind... "
"What?"
"Never mind. Just some stupid thing... "
"Are you being more stupid today or something... "
"OWW!!! You can be so... so... ARGH!"
"If you don't like it, get your ass going."
"And what's that supposed to mean?"
"I meant, if you've got problems with me, you shouldn't be around me all day... "
"And you tell me to get my ass going?!"
"Yeah... Got problems with that?"
"Well... "
"Then get the fuck back to your time... "
"You should really learn how to say things WITHOUT a curse or anything in it!"
"Why should I? I like it the way it is!"
*I like the curses... They make me the bad guy... Only weaklings don't curse... Besides, it's my habit, you go 'bathing' every three days... Now THAT is something weird... *
"Oww! You really are so rude! You don't know how to say things in a nice way, don't you?"
"Of course not! And I'm still searching for the shard in his arm. I can't find it. Where the hell is it!"
"It's more in the upper half there, Inuyasha... Gross... "
"Hey! Be happy that I'm doing it for ya!"
"Yeah... REALLY happy... "
"Got it! Now let's get out of here!"
"Shouldn't we... check if he's still alive... "
"Why should we, I don't care if he's alive or not!"
"Inuyasha! Just check his heartbeat! I wanna know if he's dead!"
"Yeah, yeah... You do it, if it's so important!"
"But… But he's… yukky… Oww, what the hell…"
Kagome got to the bloody, ragged Kouga and tried to feel his heartbeat. At first hand, she didn't feel anything and got teary eyes. But then she felt a weak beat in his chest.
"Thank god, he's still alive... "
"THANK GOD?!"
*Why would you thank GOD if the fucking bastard isn't dead! Just minutes ago you were talking so cool to him, so confident. You were as hard as a rock, with your 'Kouga, give me your shards, or die!' Why are you being so soft now?*
"Yeah, I would never forgive myself if he was dead. I know you kill youkai often, but I don't and Kouga wasn't an ordinary youkai!"
"No, he was SOOO special! Geez, why don't you get to know each other, maybe I should just go to Kaede's, so you can have some TIME OF YOUR OWN!!!"
"Inuyasha . . . Why would I want that?"
"Now don't play games with me, Kagome! I'll be going to the village. If you might change your mind, you can come after me. Not that you'd do that of course, you'd rather stay with this oh-so-special youkai, Kouga!"
"And why are you being jealous, Inuyasha! You're so… so... "
"Can't say the word now, Kagome? I guess I'll never understand the way you think. It's better this way I, I guess? You're going happy with Kouga... and I'd be like I was before... the dangerous hanyou who's mindless, hartless and more stuff. But then without Kikyo to be there for me!" Inuyasha turned his back to her and walked away. His fists were bawled and you could see he was angry.
*Fine then, Kagome! Have it your way! Have it your way. Stay with Kouga. I don't mind. I don't care. Why would I... *
"Inuyasha!!! Wait! Let me explain!"
Inuyasha turned around again. His eyes focussed on nothing. He had a neutral expression on his face, like he had no emotions.
"Tell me then, Kagome. But wait, you couldn't tell me, ne? OF COURSE YOU CAN'T TELL ME!!!"
"Inuyasha... If I was your enemy, and I'd tell you that I love you, would you kill me, without any regrets about that?"
"Would you let Naraku live if HE told you he loved you???"
"No... of course not. But that's... that's different… "
"The only thing that differs is that you don't love him, and you DO love Kouga!"
"I don't! Honestly not!"
"And you expect me to believe that bullshit! You tell me that every time! WHY do I always see different from that?"
"Because… "
"You give the impression that you love him!"
"And YOU are jealous about it!"
"I'm not jealous about it! Like I said, I'm going to the village! I just wanted to know why I let Kikyo go for you!"
That hit a spot. Kagome didn't say a thing. Kikyo again. She's DEAD. She was dead, but now she also vanished. AND STILL!!!
"What's wrong now, Kagome? Are you HURT by that? Oh my god, now that is a disaster!" he said cynically. (AN: Oops, I'm letting him be a bit to harsh . . . but well, that's what he is, ne?)
"Inuyasha…" she whispered. Why was he like this? Why?
"Well, Kagome, I guess I'd better be going," he sighed, "b'cause I've got no reason to stay around here anymore."
"Inuyasha... "
Kagome got closer to him, tears in the corners of her eyes. Inuyasha just turned away from her. Deaf for her words, blind for her tears. But... also unable to look at her.
*Why the hell is this going like this. This isn't what's supposed to happen! Why did I ever think it would work out between us when Kikyo was gone? Why did I think that... Why the hell do you act like this now Kikyo is gone? You still think Kouga is better then me, ne?*
"Inuyasha... I want to go with you. I really do! But why are you so harsh to me when I only said I'd wanted to check his heartbeat? To know if he was dead?"
"Why would you care about that?"
"You felt guilty about Kikyo dying, I felt guilty about Kouga dying. Maybe you now understand?"
"Yeah, I understand LOTS of things! I LOVED Kikyo, Kagome. So stay with Kouga, you love the bastard!"
"I don't love him! How many times do I have to say it?"
"You don't have to say it! You have to prove it! You always stay around him like you guys are a couple! What do you think of me, I should just believe everything you say?"
"Did I ever lie to you? Ever?"
"There must've been times, of course! You can't go through life without lying!"
"But in important stuff I never lied to you Inuyasha! Never ever!"
"This isn't an important situation, Kagome. Go back to your Kouga!"
"He ain't my Kouga! Inuyasha! Why won't you believe me... "
"Because you don't act like you don't like him! Why am I even having this conversation? I don't have a shit to do with your love life so I'd better get going!" Inuyasha already made attempts on going, but Kagome had something to say first.
"Inuyasha! Wait a minute! First of all I don't wanna stay here and second, I must repair the Shikon no Tama!"
"All about the fucking jewel... Geez! Get on my back."
*Everything seems to be about that stupid jewel. Everyone, including you, is here because of it and everyone is hurt because of it. Everything that goes wrong has always directly or indirectly to do with it. It's just a stupid jewel. Why make all this trouble for it, if all you get is more trouble and pain?*
~*~
What a deeply sad thought of our favourite hanyou... Still think my fic is nice I hope? Well, anyway, the next one is coming up very soon so I'll know how to continue! I can't tell you what it's about 'cause that would ruin the storyline... I love you anyway and I really love your reviews... Gosh, I think I bother you readers too much with my review stuff...
*Posted in HTML after the finish of the story. Corrected some spelling, added pragraphs. Same as usual*