Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world in general and Sirius Black in
particular belong to J.K. Rowling, and not me, unfortunately. This is
merely for fun - I know this, and you know this. Enough said.
..................
That the funeral was going to devolve into something hideous and ugly should have been a foregone conclusion. What else could it have been? Sirius didn't even really remember what it was that had possessed him to go in the first place. It couldn't possibly have gone worse, but looking back, it was hard to imagine that it could have gone any better, either. That man wasn't his father anymore; he had ceased to be the day Sirius had left home, the day his name had been stricken from the Black family tree. Why did he even bother?
When the headmaster had called him to his office, Sirius was sure he was in trouble - what else could it possibly be? When, instead, Dumbledore told him that his father had died, he was actually a little relieved. That incident with Snape and the Whomping Willow had only occurred a few months before, and it had been made quite clear to him that any more trouble would result in his immediate expulsion. After this unexpected news, Sirius had only one question.
"Why the hell should I care?"
For sure, it was a fair enough query, but Dumbledore, as solemn as Sirius had ever seen him, had simply asked him if he wanted to attend the funeral. Well, not so much asked - he advised it, and it was hard to say no to Dumbledore.
Sirius's immediate reaction was to say 'no' regardless of what the old headmaster said, and get on with his life. But something made him hesitate. Perhaps it was the knowledge that, family tree or no, he was still related to these people, like it or not. Or perhaps it was his mother.
Sirius's relationship with his mother was as bad, if not worse than things had been with his father. But, like most people, he still really wanted his mother to like him, to care for him, even if it was just a little bit. Oh, he knew she didn't, and his expectations of family acceptance were not what anyone could call unreasonable - he really didn't have any to speak of - but there was still that faint glimmer of hope.
His mother's family, although most certainly pureblood, was not considered nearly as dark as his father's had been. Perhaps, he often wondered, if his mother and father were no longer married, she would be a touch more pleasant?
But always, he'd brush this idea away quickly, it was far too foolish. It was a waste of time to toss around these "what ifs" that would never happen. However the thought was still there, and that's probably why he finally (and very reluctantly) agreed to go.
And that is how, on the 12th of January, on one of the coldest days of the year so far, he made his way to London.
The school had made arrangements for him to use the floo network, so he could more easily get to Diagon Alley, where the church that the 'grand event', as Sirius had taken to calling it, was located. He would miss less than a day of school, and that was just fine with him.
Sirius walked, as slowly as possible, down the twisted road, until he found the place he was looking for. It was not a nice looking church, and Sirius had more than his share of unpleasant childhood memories of the place. The sight of it nearly made him turn right back around and go home. Instead, he screwed up all the courage he could muster, and walked through the doors.
The sheer enormity of the crowd was nothing less than stunning, and for a minute Sirius nearly forgot why he had come in the first place. It was obvious that the Ancient and Noble House of Black had spared no expense. The whole spectacle was nothing less than revolting, and he couldn't help but roll his eyes and sigh. From what he had gathered, although his father was well known in the Ministry, he wasn't very well liked by most. It occurred to him that most of these people probably just came for the snacks, and a little amusement.
"Well, more power to them." He grumbled. How he wished that he could just have a sandwich and go back to Hogwarts.
Finally, he spotted his mother in the crowd, flanked on each side by family. Regulus, "The dutiful son" thought Sirius bitterly, was sitting right next to her.
"If he tries to get any closer to her, he'll have to crawl back in the womb," muttered Sirius, with an involuntary smile. It was now or never. He took a deep breath and walked toward them.
"Mother."
The newly widowed Mrs. Black stared at him in shock, which gave him just enough time to spit out the only thing he had to say.
"Um.er., look, I'm really sorry, uh, what happened to dad and everything, um. I know we're not on the, um.best terms, but.I'm sorry." he finished lamely.
"Yeah, nice Sirius," he thought, mentally kicking himself, "real eloquent."
Even with the many worst case scenarios he had imagined on the way here, Sirius was most certainly not prepared for his mother's response. She stood abruptly, her chair falling to the ground with a clatter, and let out an ear-splitting shriek. Impressively, the entire hall fell quiet, and, as if on cue, the crowd turned to stare voyeuristically at the unfolding drama.
"You!" She screamed, pointing a long bony finger at his chest, "What the hell do you think you're doing here? You drove your father to an early grave, and now you've come to ruin the last thing I have left, is that it?! This-"she motioned frantically around the room "Is all your fault!"
Sirius stood with his mouth hanging wide open. He doubted he could have moved an inch from the place where he stood if he tried.
"How dare you call me 'Mother'! How dare you intrude on us here, and try to worm your way back into this family after what you've done? I wish" she continued, her voice growing ever more dangerous, "That this was your funeral."
She smacked him hard across the face, turned, and walked away without even glancing back. Regulus stared at him for a moment, smirking, and followed her away.
Sirius stood frozen to his spot for a moment, swayed slightly, and slowly turned around. Hundreds of pairs of eyes were looking directly at him, from all corners of the hall, and the walk from the place where he stood to the door seemed to be the longest of his life. His mother was right about one thing - he shouldn't have come.
He was back at school only a couple of hours after he had left it, and James, Remus and Peter, although a little hesitant, were eager to know what had happened. Sirius told them that it had been unpleasant, and nothing more. They'd know soon enough, anyhow - the entire school would know once Regulus returned to Hogwarts. His brother would make sure of it. At least his friends didn't press the issue, as they were not quite sure how to behave around someone who had recently lost a relative that had been not at all liked by the unwilling mourner.
And so, life returned to something like normalcy - for a few days, at least.
Coming up - Ch 2; The Room of Requirement
..................
That the funeral was going to devolve into something hideous and ugly should have been a foregone conclusion. What else could it have been? Sirius didn't even really remember what it was that had possessed him to go in the first place. It couldn't possibly have gone worse, but looking back, it was hard to imagine that it could have gone any better, either. That man wasn't his father anymore; he had ceased to be the day Sirius had left home, the day his name had been stricken from the Black family tree. Why did he even bother?
When the headmaster had called him to his office, Sirius was sure he was in trouble - what else could it possibly be? When, instead, Dumbledore told him that his father had died, he was actually a little relieved. That incident with Snape and the Whomping Willow had only occurred a few months before, and it had been made quite clear to him that any more trouble would result in his immediate expulsion. After this unexpected news, Sirius had only one question.
"Why the hell should I care?"
For sure, it was a fair enough query, but Dumbledore, as solemn as Sirius had ever seen him, had simply asked him if he wanted to attend the funeral. Well, not so much asked - he advised it, and it was hard to say no to Dumbledore.
Sirius's immediate reaction was to say 'no' regardless of what the old headmaster said, and get on with his life. But something made him hesitate. Perhaps it was the knowledge that, family tree or no, he was still related to these people, like it or not. Or perhaps it was his mother.
Sirius's relationship with his mother was as bad, if not worse than things had been with his father. But, like most people, he still really wanted his mother to like him, to care for him, even if it was just a little bit. Oh, he knew she didn't, and his expectations of family acceptance were not what anyone could call unreasonable - he really didn't have any to speak of - but there was still that faint glimmer of hope.
His mother's family, although most certainly pureblood, was not considered nearly as dark as his father's had been. Perhaps, he often wondered, if his mother and father were no longer married, she would be a touch more pleasant?
But always, he'd brush this idea away quickly, it was far too foolish. It was a waste of time to toss around these "what ifs" that would never happen. However the thought was still there, and that's probably why he finally (and very reluctantly) agreed to go.
And that is how, on the 12th of January, on one of the coldest days of the year so far, he made his way to London.
The school had made arrangements for him to use the floo network, so he could more easily get to Diagon Alley, where the church that the 'grand event', as Sirius had taken to calling it, was located. He would miss less than a day of school, and that was just fine with him.
Sirius walked, as slowly as possible, down the twisted road, until he found the place he was looking for. It was not a nice looking church, and Sirius had more than his share of unpleasant childhood memories of the place. The sight of it nearly made him turn right back around and go home. Instead, he screwed up all the courage he could muster, and walked through the doors.
The sheer enormity of the crowd was nothing less than stunning, and for a minute Sirius nearly forgot why he had come in the first place. It was obvious that the Ancient and Noble House of Black had spared no expense. The whole spectacle was nothing less than revolting, and he couldn't help but roll his eyes and sigh. From what he had gathered, although his father was well known in the Ministry, he wasn't very well liked by most. It occurred to him that most of these people probably just came for the snacks, and a little amusement.
"Well, more power to them." He grumbled. How he wished that he could just have a sandwich and go back to Hogwarts.
Finally, he spotted his mother in the crowd, flanked on each side by family. Regulus, "The dutiful son" thought Sirius bitterly, was sitting right next to her.
"If he tries to get any closer to her, he'll have to crawl back in the womb," muttered Sirius, with an involuntary smile. It was now or never. He took a deep breath and walked toward them.
"Mother."
The newly widowed Mrs. Black stared at him in shock, which gave him just enough time to spit out the only thing he had to say.
"Um.er., look, I'm really sorry, uh, what happened to dad and everything, um. I know we're not on the, um.best terms, but.I'm sorry." he finished lamely.
"Yeah, nice Sirius," he thought, mentally kicking himself, "real eloquent."
Even with the many worst case scenarios he had imagined on the way here, Sirius was most certainly not prepared for his mother's response. She stood abruptly, her chair falling to the ground with a clatter, and let out an ear-splitting shriek. Impressively, the entire hall fell quiet, and, as if on cue, the crowd turned to stare voyeuristically at the unfolding drama.
"You!" She screamed, pointing a long bony finger at his chest, "What the hell do you think you're doing here? You drove your father to an early grave, and now you've come to ruin the last thing I have left, is that it?! This-"she motioned frantically around the room "Is all your fault!"
Sirius stood with his mouth hanging wide open. He doubted he could have moved an inch from the place where he stood if he tried.
"How dare you call me 'Mother'! How dare you intrude on us here, and try to worm your way back into this family after what you've done? I wish" she continued, her voice growing ever more dangerous, "That this was your funeral."
She smacked him hard across the face, turned, and walked away without even glancing back. Regulus stared at him for a moment, smirking, and followed her away.
Sirius stood frozen to his spot for a moment, swayed slightly, and slowly turned around. Hundreds of pairs of eyes were looking directly at him, from all corners of the hall, and the walk from the place where he stood to the door seemed to be the longest of his life. His mother was right about one thing - he shouldn't have come.
He was back at school only a couple of hours after he had left it, and James, Remus and Peter, although a little hesitant, were eager to know what had happened. Sirius told them that it had been unpleasant, and nothing more. They'd know soon enough, anyhow - the entire school would know once Regulus returned to Hogwarts. His brother would make sure of it. At least his friends didn't press the issue, as they were not quite sure how to behave around someone who had recently lost a relative that had been not at all liked by the unwilling mourner.
And so, life returned to something like normalcy - for a few days, at least.
Coming up - Ch 2; The Room of Requirement