Hola readers! Thank you for taking time from your life to read what I
write! I love you for actually paying attention to this. My heart swells
with gratitude! I wub you very much! Anyway, this is a Degrassi song
fiction "Going Under". The-N owns Degrassi, Evanesence owns "Going Under".
I just happen to like both of them! :)
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Chapter 1: PROLOGUE: Beginning to See
Ashley was sick of the way her room was. It always looked so... ordinary. She remembered everything that had ever happened in there: the time she almost had sex with Jimmy, when she made out with Sean, when she signed Jimmy's yearbook... the thought came back to her, and she shuddered. How could she have been so naive? She stared at her alarm clock. It was three in the morning.
She needed change, and she needed it right at that moment. She got out of bed, and began to move everything. It took her until 6:45 for everything to be perfect. Nothing was where it had been, everything was far from it's original location: the piano was at the window, the desk was where the bed had been, her dresser was in her closet, and her bed was directly in the middle of it all.
Ashley stared at it, and lay back down in her bed, with a feeling of satisfaction. Then, she looked at the wall, there was a picture of her and Jimmy, still in a neat little frame, that made her want to gag. She couldn't stand her past life as a prep, though in actuality she missed it.
She began to remember everything she did. Go shopping, listen to happy sounds, not wearing that eye liner. And then she recalled that night.... the night she took ecstacy. She remembered the high points and the things she had done. She looked over at her mirror, her once shoulder length hair was now like a man's, her eyes didn't look like her own, and her nails were what she hated. Ashley looked in her own eyes and saw not the face of herself, but the face of someone hiding.
Yes, she thought, I'm hiding. This isn't me... or maybe I wasn't who I was before I.... and... Her alarm rang into her ear, and tears of wonder, tears of madness... the tears of sheer guilt came down her face as she realized she no longer knew who she was.
~~~***~~~
Chapter 1: PROLOGUE: Beginning to See
Ashley was sick of the way her room was. It always looked so... ordinary. She remembered everything that had ever happened in there: the time she almost had sex with Jimmy, when she made out with Sean, when she signed Jimmy's yearbook... the thought came back to her, and she shuddered. How could she have been so naive? She stared at her alarm clock. It was three in the morning.
She needed change, and she needed it right at that moment. She got out of bed, and began to move everything. It took her until 6:45 for everything to be perfect. Nothing was where it had been, everything was far from it's original location: the piano was at the window, the desk was where the bed had been, her dresser was in her closet, and her bed was directly in the middle of it all.
Ashley stared at it, and lay back down in her bed, with a feeling of satisfaction. Then, she looked at the wall, there was a picture of her and Jimmy, still in a neat little frame, that made her want to gag. She couldn't stand her past life as a prep, though in actuality she missed it.
She began to remember everything she did. Go shopping, listen to happy sounds, not wearing that eye liner. And then she recalled that night.... the night she took ecstacy. She remembered the high points and the things she had done. She looked over at her mirror, her once shoulder length hair was now like a man's, her eyes didn't look like her own, and her nails were what she hated. Ashley looked in her own eyes and saw not the face of herself, but the face of someone hiding.
Yes, she thought, I'm hiding. This isn't me... or maybe I wasn't who I was before I.... and... Her alarm rang into her ear, and tears of wonder, tears of madness... the tears of sheer guilt came down her face as she realized she no longer knew who she was.