Disclaimer: Once again, Moulin Rouge isn't mine. We knew that.
Note: Not really sure how this one happened. One of those 'listening to Evanescence while staying awake until 6 am' type deals. Again. ;) Also, BlackTangledHeart [go read her stuff, I promise, you will not be disappointed!] got me reading a few Nini/NA fics and I wanted to try something from a different point of view. Specifically, Nini's, as I've never put much thought into it before reading her fics and those of others who tend to favor the minor characters. Thanks, guys.
I Must Be Dreaming
She sat alone on the stairs of the elephant, exhaling a long drag from a cigarette held daintily in her hand. Her chin rest in the palm of her hand, her body swaying ever so slightly out of boredom. Usually the elephant was strictly Satine's territory, however, tonight, Satine was nowhere to be seen. Nini's job had been done for tonight, and luckily for her, the customer had a family to return to, leaving her with the rest of the night to do as she pleased. Free time was not something she was accustomed to having, let alone using. Thoughts of all sorts sorted themselves in her mind those few minutes of quiet with nothing but the moon and stars to keep her company. Nini couldn't remember the last time she had time to herself, it was also dangerous; thinking thoughts she didn't know she had. She inhaled and exhaled another drag before tossing the nearly gone cigarette butt into the garden below.
Just before she thought of turning in, she heard a door slam against the wall and unrelenting fit of giggles erupting from the room. She snuck cautiously down the few steps, careful not to let herself be known and peered carefully from her perch. Though it was a tad dark, the moon was bright enough that she could distinguish what was happening. Satine had burst in the room, one hand over her mouth trying to muffle her constant almost drunken giggles, which was failing, and leading the writer with the other. He followed with the same grace as the laughter that escaped her lips, stumbling, yet his eyes were still full of color. He, too, was laughing, though not as boisterously, following her without hesitation, his face smothered in crimson lipstick. She had led to him to the bed, pushed off to the side of the room, it's satin sheets awaiting what the night had in store. Nini turned away for a moment, confused. So it wasn't just all an act, after all?
She let her attention return back to the bed. Christian had himself hovering over her now, perpetually yet passionately planting kisses upon her lips, the same lips that had told countless lies to countless amounts of men between the same sheets. Satine still had managed to whisper her "I love you's" between them, it's a wonder she could breathe let alone speak.
After a few moments, they both silenced, though it took a few minutes for her giggling to come to an end. Nini could hear them whispering, probably dreaming dreams that they only knew would ever exist as dreams. However she couldn't help but wonder what went on in their minds. She was already painstakingly jealous of Satine for her accomplishments within the Moulin Rouge, though they weren't necessarily things to be proud of. But she couldn't possibly truly love him, this had to be one of her acts; Something she was doing to test her acting ability. It wouldn't have been the first nor second time she had a man believing that she loved him. Next week at this time she'll have the poor boy drowning in his tears just like the men before him, who believed that Satine, the most prized whore at the most haughty night club, would give her soul to him and only him. Yes, this sounded like an appropriate theory. Nini almost felt sorry for Christian, if only for a moment, if at all.
After what seemed hours, which it probably was, seeing as the sun was starting to come out of his resting spot, Nini heard them begin to speak rather than whisper.
"I'm sorry it has to be this way," Satine sighed, inching closer to Christian, who was now lying by her side. He said nothing, just gave a slight nod. It was obvious she wanted him to tell her everything would be alright in the end, that they'd both fly away from here, but they both knew it wasn't true. He didn't want to lie to her. His only other motion was turning to face her and wrapping an arm tightly around her waist, pulling them as close as two people could be without being one.
"Not that I want you to…but…you have to go now. Harold's going to be coming around to collect the earnings…not that he'll find any here…he can't see you here…" Satine whispered, her voice cracked almost threatening to cry, as if the musings of what she pictured happening if they'd been 'discovered' happened. Nini gave a slight laugh at this, almost in spite. She'd never seen Satine cry honestly before.
Christian began to get up, Satine watching him the whole while. He now stood over her again, she, sitting up, the blankets held tight against her bare body to keep from getting a chill from the morning's breeze. He leaned down and kissed her passionately once more. She wrapped her arms around his neck, yet only for a moment before she pulled away.
"See you in a few hours, love…" Christian still clasped her cold hand, yet eventually had let it fall when he departed. Nini raised an eyebrow, wondering what she was really thinking. This was definitely one of her acts, she was throwing to much of herself into it, a dead give away.
In the time of her quick thought, Satine had managed to put on a robe properly and sit back up in bed, as if still waiting for him. Ever the drama queen. It was now or never. Nini stepped into the elephant, leaning against a pole, arms crossed.
"Please don't tell me you really love him."
Satine spun around, all the blood draining from her face, looking as if she'd seen a ghost.
"How can I pretend that I don't see, what you hide so carelessly?" Nini taunted, raising an eyebrow, a vain smile appearing on her face.
"Stay out of this." It was obvious Satine was at a loss for words. Nini had never found her so vulnerable before.
"I've got to tell someone, tell them what I know you've done." The smile was still ever present across her lips. It was almost like trying to get an older sister in trouble, just for the sake of getting them in trouble and nothing else.
"You're just jealous!" She had hit the weak spot.
"Jealous of what? You're penniless writer? We both know you've done better, quite literally."
Satine turned away. She'd been caught.
"All those nights you said you were rehearsing, if that's what you want to call it. You were at his garret. I'm not blind or stupid, you know. Harold may be, but not after I tell him. It'll all make sense, to both him and that Duke of yours. Oh, won't this be a delight to him…"
She still said nothing, but it was obvious she was shaking, either out of rage, nervousness, or shame, but it wasn't the cold. "This is between Christian and myself, please…just…don't do this to me."
Nini thought for a moment. How could she use to this to her situation? What did she want that she could get out of this?
"Just answer me one question and I won't mention it. I swear."
"I don't trust you. I know you're jealous, I'm not blind or stupid, either. Besides, you'd just be hurting yourself. You want to go on and be a dancer, or an actress, or…something, too, I know it. Face it, you're all depending on me to make all of your dreams come true. Don't do this to yourself."
So the tables had turned. "Just answer me one question and I won't mention it to anyone."
"Fine. Ask. I don't care anymore."
"Do you really love him, Mademoiselle Sparkling Diamond? Would you really throw your entire career away for him? You've got everything you could ever fucking dream of right in front of you and you're letting him block your view. Not that I care either way, I could put myself in your place if I really wanted to, you know."
"I said only one question."
"Is this one of your acts?"
There was a silence. Satine's lip quivered slightly before replying. "No."
"Don't lie to me."
"I'm not." It became obvious that she was irritated now.
Nini nodded. She hadn't moved from her place, yet she knew Satine was in her power now. So this is what it feels like, to pay a whore, she thought, a chill running up her spine at the musing.
"Why do you care, Nini?"
"It gives me power. Now I can smash every dream you've ever had and give it to myself. All because the Sparkling Diamond decides to break the single rule. You can do whatever the fuck you want, yet you go and break the very rule that is set. You fell in love. And not even with the man who can give you everything, but with one who can give you nothing at all! You're a fool, Satine, and you did this to yourself."
Satine still sat, dumbfounded. How dare she. Nini was jealous, it was nothing more. Even if she did tell anyone, they wouldn't believe her. She was Satine, the star, the Sparkling Diamond. It was because of her that they were all going to have their own hopes and dreams come true, and they'd have Nini to blame if they failed.
Nini turned on her heel to leave, just before remembering one more smart remark she could hear out to make Satine uncomfortable again. "Oh, and thank you."
Satine did nothing. She knew what Nini had meant, and chose to ignore the comment. She's just jealous, repeated over and over in her head, knowing that it wasn't true. Or perhaps it was. It didn't matter anymore. Tomorrow night would be the same, though perhaps in Christian's garret. The only reason they had come here was that Satine had promised the Duke she'd be here in the morning, yet didn't want to leave Christian so early in the night.
Nini had gone. Off to her own quarters, or perhaps out to find another customer, leaving Satine more alone than she'd felt in a while. She wanted, more than ever, to run to Christian, to tell him what had happened, and to leave. To go wherever they could go. No. She wouldn't. She would stay here and do her duty. It wasn't just for herself anymore, it was for everyone, yet she'd still make herself believing that it'd be Nini's fault if things went wrong. Though, she knew in her heart, the same heart that put her in this position, that she was wrong.
Hm, that was pointless. I'll probably re-do this one day, Nini didn't come across quite how I wanted her to.
Parts of what Nini says comes from "I Must Be Dreaming" by the ever so inspiring Evanescence.
