::A/N::
________ =Flashbacks/thoughts
(( ____ ))=Diary/Journal entries or just things one of them wrote **FYI: I wrote all of the poems, ect so please ask before you take and give me credit cuz copyin and pastin dont take skill.... **
*** _____ ***=Song lyrics- look at the song credits at the end of each chapter....
disclaimer: I don't own the HP series, yada yada...
Fic Info:
Title: Whispers of Suicide
Rating: R for violence, gore, suicide, drug use, heavy language, some sexual situations
Summary:
Draco is struggling with his life- his suicide attempts getting worse and worse...
Pansy is fighting with her all to keep him alive, but he is slowly dragging her down with him...
Other Info:
Told in different POVs, each time ** is put between text, the POV changes. Contains things like letters, diary entries, song lyrics, and the occasional "Daily Prophet" article. Told in a very interesting and capturing way....
******************************************************************************************************
...**Chapter 4**...
***Long lost words whisper slowly to me.
Still can't find what keeps me here.
When all of this time I've been so hollow inside.
I know you're still there.***
**
Pansy sat alone in the common room, watching the fire. It was nearly 1:30 in the morning, and everyone had retreated to their dorms hours before. Draco appeared before her, a soft gaze in his eyes. He sat down beside her and she scooted close to him, laying her head down on him. He gently stroked her arm, the firelight dancing across his face. "I want it to all go away." She said, staring into the fire. Draco was silent. "I just want it to be you and me...without all of this hurt between us. I don't wanna let it break us apart." "It never will." Pansy lifted her head. "I'm so sorry for hurting you, Pans, I love you so-" "Just shut up and kiss me." Their lips met, and Draco wrapped his arms around her. Pansy withdrew, gazing into his crystal blue eyes. "I love you too."
**
((Save yourself, love,
don't let me take you down.
Don't let my pain become your own.
there's nothing that can amount...
to you.
So take my hand,
and let it go.
Leaving you with just one thing,
you need to know.
You held my hand all through the dark,
you love me despite my pain.
I pray to you now,
love me and not in vain.
Love reaches across enternity,
Let's see how far it can be.
Just take my hand,
and let it go.
And don't scream, my precious...
my love is here.))
**
Pansy stared at the little black notebook in the middle of the table. Should she read it? Temptation took her over and she took it in her hands, turning it over and over. It was worn, and the pages were yellowing. She flipped open the cover, fanning the pages through her fingers. They were filled- Draco's handwriting scribbled across the pages. She stopped somewhere in the middle, reading the page....
((They have no idea-
the jagged edges of my past
coming back to cut me open-
pull me open-
to make assumptions.
To help me is to kill me.
So kill me, love, and help me die.
I'd love you to hate me-
to not feel a thing for me.
But you're trapped up inside me,
holding your mind-
there's nothing free.
I lay my head down
on the satin silk of the night-
falling through the dakrness-
not even trying to win the fight.
Moonlight wishes-
you dance upon the night.
Maddness encloses-
nothing will ever be right.))
......
**
Pansy shoved the book at Draco. "You left this downstairs." She said hastily, before turning on her heels and leaving. "Pansy, wait." Draco ran after her. "What's wrong?" Pansy whirled around. Pansy snatched the book back from him, flipping it open to a page. "I'm swimming in the sea of silk, her skin caressing mine. It means so much to her yet nothing in my heart. Her chest is heaving, the night enclosing, I'm diving into-" "Pans, look-" "You've never slept with ME, so I can only imagine who this is about!" "I can explain." "I don't wanna hear your excuses, Draco! I give up!" Draco stood, watching her as tears built up in her eyes. "Why do you insist on hiding this shit from me?!?" Pansy yelled. "Why the hell do you insist on putting yourself through all this misery? I realize now that there is no way to help you. I give up. You're not letting me in! Let me the fuck in, Dray! Maybe then you'll see what might become of you!" Tears bled from her eyes now. "You're killing yourself slowly and painfully. I just can't watch it anymore! There's nothing I can do but watch you die!" Pansy ran down the empty corridor, sobbing.
**
Draco ripped the pages from the book, tearing them each to shreds. He furiously tossed the remaining pages into the fire, collapsing into one of the oversized chairs in front of it. The fire reflected in his eyes as he watched his words of pain and hurt burn in the fire- feeling himself as he was freed of it all. He pulled the small blade from his pocket, examining it. He pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill- and wrote this...
"If you can't stand to see me in pain-
I'll let you out of your misery then.
I'm leaving you- letting you forget.
Just forget."
***I tried to kill the pain
But only brought more.
I lay dying.
And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal.
I'm dying, praying, bleeding and screaming...
Am I too lost to be saved?
Am I too lost?***
~*~
Once again, let it sink in.
I think life is turning back into an endless shit hole for me, either that or the fact that I am totally utterly alone is finally sinking in.....
::Song Credits::
Evanescence- Haunted
Evanescence- Tourniquet
God help us all....
sara
***
________ =Flashbacks/thoughts
(( ____ ))=Diary/Journal entries or just things one of them wrote **FYI: I wrote all of the poems, ect so please ask before you take and give me credit cuz copyin and pastin dont take skill.... **
*** _____ ***=Song lyrics- look at the song credits at the end of each chapter....
disclaimer: I don't own the HP series, yada yada...
Fic Info:
Title: Whispers of Suicide
Rating: R for violence, gore, suicide, drug use, heavy language, some sexual situations
Summary:
Draco is struggling with his life- his suicide attempts getting worse and worse...
Pansy is fighting with her all to keep him alive, but he is slowly dragging her down with him...
Other Info:
Told in different POVs, each time ** is put between text, the POV changes. Contains things like letters, diary entries, song lyrics, and the occasional "Daily Prophet" article. Told in a very interesting and capturing way....
******************************************************************************************************
...**Chapter 4**...
***Long lost words whisper slowly to me.
Still can't find what keeps me here.
When all of this time I've been so hollow inside.
I know you're still there.***
**
Pansy sat alone in the common room, watching the fire. It was nearly 1:30 in the morning, and everyone had retreated to their dorms hours before. Draco appeared before her, a soft gaze in his eyes. He sat down beside her and she scooted close to him, laying her head down on him. He gently stroked her arm, the firelight dancing across his face. "I want it to all go away." She said, staring into the fire. Draco was silent. "I just want it to be you and me...without all of this hurt between us. I don't wanna let it break us apart." "It never will." Pansy lifted her head. "I'm so sorry for hurting you, Pans, I love you so-" "Just shut up and kiss me." Their lips met, and Draco wrapped his arms around her. Pansy withdrew, gazing into his crystal blue eyes. "I love you too."
**
((Save yourself, love,
don't let me take you down.
Don't let my pain become your own.
there's nothing that can amount...
to you.
So take my hand,
and let it go.
Leaving you with just one thing,
you need to know.
You held my hand all through the dark,
you love me despite my pain.
I pray to you now,
love me and not in vain.
Love reaches across enternity,
Let's see how far it can be.
Just take my hand,
and let it go.
And don't scream, my precious...
my love is here.))
**
Pansy stared at the little black notebook in the middle of the table. Should she read it? Temptation took her over and she took it in her hands, turning it over and over. It was worn, and the pages were yellowing. She flipped open the cover, fanning the pages through her fingers. They were filled- Draco's handwriting scribbled across the pages. She stopped somewhere in the middle, reading the page....
((They have no idea-
the jagged edges of my past
coming back to cut me open-
pull me open-
to make assumptions.
To help me is to kill me.
So kill me, love, and help me die.
I'd love you to hate me-
to not feel a thing for me.
But you're trapped up inside me,
holding your mind-
there's nothing free.
I lay my head down
on the satin silk of the night-
falling through the dakrness-
not even trying to win the fight.
Moonlight wishes-
you dance upon the night.
Maddness encloses-
nothing will ever be right.))
......
**
Pansy shoved the book at Draco. "You left this downstairs." She said hastily, before turning on her heels and leaving. "Pansy, wait." Draco ran after her. "What's wrong?" Pansy whirled around. Pansy snatched the book back from him, flipping it open to a page. "I'm swimming in the sea of silk, her skin caressing mine. It means so much to her yet nothing in my heart. Her chest is heaving, the night enclosing, I'm diving into-" "Pans, look-" "You've never slept with ME, so I can only imagine who this is about!" "I can explain." "I don't wanna hear your excuses, Draco! I give up!" Draco stood, watching her as tears built up in her eyes. "Why do you insist on hiding this shit from me?!?" Pansy yelled. "Why the hell do you insist on putting yourself through all this misery? I realize now that there is no way to help you. I give up. You're not letting me in! Let me the fuck in, Dray! Maybe then you'll see what might become of you!" Tears bled from her eyes now. "You're killing yourself slowly and painfully. I just can't watch it anymore! There's nothing I can do but watch you die!" Pansy ran down the empty corridor, sobbing.
**
Draco ripped the pages from the book, tearing them each to shreds. He furiously tossed the remaining pages into the fire, collapsing into one of the oversized chairs in front of it. The fire reflected in his eyes as he watched his words of pain and hurt burn in the fire- feeling himself as he was freed of it all. He pulled the small blade from his pocket, examining it. He pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill- and wrote this...
"If you can't stand to see me in pain-
I'll let you out of your misery then.
I'm leaving you- letting you forget.
Just forget."
***I tried to kill the pain
But only brought more.
I lay dying.
And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal.
I'm dying, praying, bleeding and screaming...
Am I too lost to be saved?
Am I too lost?***
~*~
Once again, let it sink in.
I think life is turning back into an endless shit hole for me, either that or the fact that I am totally utterly alone is finally sinking in.....
::Song Credits::
Evanescence- Haunted
Evanescence- Tourniquet
God help us all....
sara
***