Part 11-
When Megan came out of the bathroom she tucked a portion of hair behind her ear and looked up at the boys. It was about ten thirty at night and they shot her confused glances. With an equally unsure expression, Megan walked to Peter's bed (who's turn it was to let Megan sleep in his and he on the floor) and pulled back the bedding. As she got under the sheets she felt the stares on her back and she looked up at the boys.
"What!" She blurted out. She was getting aggravated by the silence. "What are you looking at?"
"You sure were in the bathroom a long time." Darryl mentioned. Megan searched their faces for a smile, like that they were tricking the pathological liar and were going to explode with laughter at any moment. She received no such glance.
"Yeah." She concurred and drew her words out for a long moment.
"But your hair still looks the same." Said Peter from the floor. Megan looked down at him and he looked at her puzzled.
"I wasn't fixing my hair. Why would I fix my hair at-"
"Then what were you doing in there for so long?" James interrupted.
"I was using the bathroom." She told them. She was still very confused by their bewilderment.
"Man, you take a long time to pee." David said and marveled at her.
"I wasn't peeing." She said, a little embarrassed.
"Then how else were you 'using the bathroom'?" Reumus asked and used quotations around Megan's own words.
"I wasn't peeing." She repeated with a hinting tone in her voice.
"Don't tell me you were pooping!" James asked excitedly.
"James, girls don't poop." David said.
"Yeah, it's common knowledge." Sirius agreed.
"What! Of course we poop, everyone poops."
"Not girls."
"They never talk about it." James pointed out.
"And girls are too, you know, girly." Reumus added.
"They don't poop." David stated and the group all agreed.
"You are all nuts." She said and laid down. "The next time I poop, I'm going to leave it in the toilet and show you guys."
"That's disgusting." Darryl said and got in his bed.
"Who's too girly now?" She said sarcastically. "It doesn't matter to me, you'll find out when you get married."
"Oh, that's when they start." Reumus said.
"When?" Megan asked. "Please enlighten me one my own excretory system."
"Girls start pooping when they get married. My ex-girlfriend Liz told me." Reumus said.
"And you believing her, yeah, that's probably why she's a former girlfriend." She said, emphasizing the word 'former'.
"Go to sleep Megan." Reumus said, defeated.
"Heh, heh. Go make me a sandwich." She said with joy.
"What?" He asked.
"Yeah, you've lost. Now you're my little bitch and you get to make me a sandwich." The rest of the boys laughed at him.
"I'm not making you a sandwich."
"Actually, at first I was kidding but this brings up the subject of food." She said and sat up. "You guys, I sincerely appreciate all the food you've been bringing me from meals. But, could you not put it in your pockets?" She requested. "Maybe we could work out a Ziploc baggie system?"
"Why?" Sirius asked.
"You're getting pocket lint on all my food." She said.
"I'm actually getting kind of sick of gravy inside my pockets." James said. Megan motioned at him.
"Ok, so now we can think of a better way to feed me. Then I can poop it all out." She said and laughed at Reumus. "Dumbasses believing girls don't poop..." She murmured.
Megan woke up twelve hours later. The room was empty, the boys were in class and she decided to continue with her mischief making that she had started the day before. She climbed out of bed, went to the bathroom and opened a drawer. A massive amount of makeup from the Gryffindor girls dormitory sat in front of her like the Holy Grail. She smiled and jumped up on the counter, plucking blush, eye shadow, lipstick, all sorts of things, from the drawer and applying it to her face. She admired herself for a moment and then got off the counter. A smile widened across her face and she left.
She came down the stairs, past multiple doors that led into the other boys dormitories, and then entered the common room. Megan jumped on the thick armchairs and walked on them instead of the floor. She kept bouncing, attempting to grasp the rafter above her head to no avail. When that bored her (about an hour and a half later) she strolled to the door to the girls dormitory and went inside. Up the stairs, humming a song, she went into the first door she saw. This was the first year girls dorm. There hadn't been many interesting items in there before so she kept her snooping to a minimum.
The sixth year girls proved to be her favorite room. She had figured out which area was her grandmother's. She sat on her bed and rummaged through her drawers, reading letters and looking at pictures. She found a particularly ironic letter from a girl named Tonya:
'Lil-
Oh my God! James Potter asked you to the Yule Ball? That's so weird! I saw him writing something in Potions and he wouldn't let me read it. I bet that was his letter to you. I'm so excited for you. Are you going to say yes? You better say yes! He's such a nice guy. Besides the whole Marauder thing. Although, that's kind of a plus when you think about it. Well, Binns is looking at me funny, I better go.
Au Revoir,
Tonya'
That one was dated from 1975, a year before. Megan smiled as she wiped a tear from her chin and wondered what Lily had said. The letter she had found when she was cleaning must have been his first attempt at asking her to the dance. He probably couldn't get the nerve to give it to her until it was too late and he had lost it so he had written another one.
"Poor guy." She said and put the letter back. Megan left the dormitory exactly as she had found it, returning to her place of temporary residence. As she walked in the door she noticed James was there, fists clenched, eyes closed and his back to the door. He was listening to a song and singing along with it.
"I'm a joker, I'm a smoker, I'm a midnight toker. I get my lovin' on the ruuuun..." The musical bridge came into the song and he continued bobbing stiffly to the song. "This is like, my anthem." He said and Megan exploded with laughter. He turned to her suddenly, with embarrassment.
"What the hell! Your anthem? Are you a country? Maybe a TV show." She said when she wasn't gasping for breath and laughing.
"Shut up, Megan." He said. She stopped momentarily but continued when the voice from the gramophone sounded again with a 'Woop woooo'.
"Don't you worry baby, don't worry, Mama." She said mockingly and grabbed his shoulder.
"I hate you." He turned it off, grabbed his Charms book and left.
***
A few nights later, the boys (and Megan) were in the dormitory about to go to sleep when Peter came out of the bathroom with his hands full of the stolen make-up. He looked down at his hands as he shut the door with his butt. Reumus, who's bed was adjacent to the bathroom (and closest to Peter), caught Peter's eye and then looked at the make up.
"Guys," Peter said and looked at the Marauders. "I-I know we take things sometimes, but I don't remember taking the girls make up. I really, really don't." He said earnestly.
"We didn't take it." James said and jumped off the bed and over to Peter. "I know we didn't. Maybe someone drugged us and then we took it." James offered.
"No one drugged us." Sirius said and looked over at Megan from the corner of his eye.
"I remember stealing it!" David said and Darryl nodded.
"Yes, we were trying to defeat the Dark Lord and get into the Chamber of Secrets when-"
"Everybody knows the Chamber of Secrets isn't real, Darryl." Reumus said. Megan noticed the cruel irony that none of them would know for at least twenty-five years.
"Look, we didn't steal it, that's the bottom line." James said and picked up an eye shadow. He looked at the bottom and the initials 'LE' on the label.
"And how likely is it that Dumb and Dumber did?" Reumus said.
"Megan, did you steal the make up?" Peter asked, still holding all of it.
"What! No, that's my make up." She lied and started grabbing them out of Peter's hands. James gripped her wrist as she reached for a tube of lipstick.
"If this is yours, what does LE stand for?" He asked and flashed the bottom of the eye shadow disc in his hand.
"LE? That's -um- my nickname. Love Eater." She said unsurely and searched around with her eyes.
"Love Eater?" James asked skeptically and let go of her wrist. She glared at him and snatched the eye shadow from his hand.
"Hey! It's better than Space Cowboy." She said and ran into the bathroom.
Three hours later she was still in the bathroom with the door locked. Reumus had spent twenty minuets banging on the door trying to make Megan let him in.
"Megan, please! I've really got to pee!" He would plead.
"Go out the window." Was her response more often than not. Once, Reumus almost broke down and did, but then reasoned with himself.
"I can't, um, 'go' out the window. The groundskeeper is out there."
"Pee on his head!" She shouted angrily.
"Megan, I'll get frostbite on my..." He started but trailed off.
"On your what?" Megan asked, finally finding some joy in this situation.
"On my you-know-what."
"Your wanky?" She asked in a high pitched, childish voice.
"Yes, yes my wanky, now let me in-"
"Your weiner?" She said in the same taunting voice.
"Megan, let me in."
"There are so many things you could call that."
"Why don't we discuss this, after I pee!" He begged.
"After you pee out of your Opposite of a Vagina?"
"Fuck you, Megan." He said and gave up
.
"Heh, Heh, Heh." She said, happy with herself. She then turned on the faucet very high, high enough to be loud enough to be heard in the dorm room.
"I hope you die!" He shouted.
They tried so hard to get Megan out of that bathroom. Megan actually wanted to come out, but didn't want to face the boys after stealing. Suddenly there was a rap on the door.
"Megan, we've got a suprise for you." She heard Sirius' voice, more calming than usual.
"For me?"
"For you." Sirius answered. "It's pizza."
"Pizza?"
"Yes, with pineapple and pepperoni and cheese."
"Pineapple?"
"THERE'S NO PIZZA!" Said an angry, growling voice in her ear. There was no one in the bathroom but herself, and she remembered opening her mouth to say it but she didn't know why. "THEY'RE LYING TO YOU!" It said.
"Why would they lie to you? They're your friends. They love you." Said a calming voice in her other ear. Another voice she knew she had made, but didn't know why.
"Megan, are you in there with someone?" David asked.
"No." She said quickly.
"But I hear someone." He said and leaned his ear against the door.
"Liar!" She shouted.
"I KNOW THERE'S NO PIZZA, I SAW THEM EAT IT ALL." Said the angry voice.
"Yes there is." Megan argued and shot up from the floor and put her hand on the door knob. Then she heard another voice from behind the door.
"Hey, Meg." Said the unfamiliar male voice. "This is Jim, Jim Morrison. I'll let you light my fire if you break on through to this side of the door." Megan jumped back in excitement and then suddenly opened the door to a room with no pizza, no pineapple, no pepperoni, and no Jim Morrison. She looked at them, with sheer disappointment in her eyes.
"I was delirious." She said and shook her head, going towards the bed. Reumus made a mad dash for the door and the rest of the room went to sleep.
{A/N: Ok, a few parts that need some discussion: The poop thing: Something we actually had to clarify with a few of our guy friends. How fucked up is that? All the penis names: I dunno, just thought it might be humorous and the Jim Morrison thing: Did you catch alll three references in that sentence? Uh-huh, extra points if you did! Talking to herself: Hell if I know, just a fun comment. And we're done! Mucho Love! Thanks for your reviews!}
When Megan came out of the bathroom she tucked a portion of hair behind her ear and looked up at the boys. It was about ten thirty at night and they shot her confused glances. With an equally unsure expression, Megan walked to Peter's bed (who's turn it was to let Megan sleep in his and he on the floor) and pulled back the bedding. As she got under the sheets she felt the stares on her back and she looked up at the boys.
"What!" She blurted out. She was getting aggravated by the silence. "What are you looking at?"
"You sure were in the bathroom a long time." Darryl mentioned. Megan searched their faces for a smile, like that they were tricking the pathological liar and were going to explode with laughter at any moment. She received no such glance.
"Yeah." She concurred and drew her words out for a long moment.
"But your hair still looks the same." Said Peter from the floor. Megan looked down at him and he looked at her puzzled.
"I wasn't fixing my hair. Why would I fix my hair at-"
"Then what were you doing in there for so long?" James interrupted.
"I was using the bathroom." She told them. She was still very confused by their bewilderment.
"Man, you take a long time to pee." David said and marveled at her.
"I wasn't peeing." She said, a little embarrassed.
"Then how else were you 'using the bathroom'?" Reumus asked and used quotations around Megan's own words.
"I wasn't peeing." She repeated with a hinting tone in her voice.
"Don't tell me you were pooping!" James asked excitedly.
"James, girls don't poop." David said.
"Yeah, it's common knowledge." Sirius agreed.
"What! Of course we poop, everyone poops."
"Not girls."
"They never talk about it." James pointed out.
"And girls are too, you know, girly." Reumus added.
"They don't poop." David stated and the group all agreed.
"You are all nuts." She said and laid down. "The next time I poop, I'm going to leave it in the toilet and show you guys."
"That's disgusting." Darryl said and got in his bed.
"Who's too girly now?" She said sarcastically. "It doesn't matter to me, you'll find out when you get married."
"Oh, that's when they start." Reumus said.
"When?" Megan asked. "Please enlighten me one my own excretory system."
"Girls start pooping when they get married. My ex-girlfriend Liz told me." Reumus said.
"And you believing her, yeah, that's probably why she's a former girlfriend." She said, emphasizing the word 'former'.
"Go to sleep Megan." Reumus said, defeated.
"Heh, heh. Go make me a sandwich." She said with joy.
"What?" He asked.
"Yeah, you've lost. Now you're my little bitch and you get to make me a sandwich." The rest of the boys laughed at him.
"I'm not making you a sandwich."
"Actually, at first I was kidding but this brings up the subject of food." She said and sat up. "You guys, I sincerely appreciate all the food you've been bringing me from meals. But, could you not put it in your pockets?" She requested. "Maybe we could work out a Ziploc baggie system?"
"Why?" Sirius asked.
"You're getting pocket lint on all my food." She said.
"I'm actually getting kind of sick of gravy inside my pockets." James said. Megan motioned at him.
"Ok, so now we can think of a better way to feed me. Then I can poop it all out." She said and laughed at Reumus. "Dumbasses believing girls don't poop..." She murmured.
Megan woke up twelve hours later. The room was empty, the boys were in class and she decided to continue with her mischief making that she had started the day before. She climbed out of bed, went to the bathroom and opened a drawer. A massive amount of makeup from the Gryffindor girls dormitory sat in front of her like the Holy Grail. She smiled and jumped up on the counter, plucking blush, eye shadow, lipstick, all sorts of things, from the drawer and applying it to her face. She admired herself for a moment and then got off the counter. A smile widened across her face and she left.
She came down the stairs, past multiple doors that led into the other boys dormitories, and then entered the common room. Megan jumped on the thick armchairs and walked on them instead of the floor. She kept bouncing, attempting to grasp the rafter above her head to no avail. When that bored her (about an hour and a half later) she strolled to the door to the girls dormitory and went inside. Up the stairs, humming a song, she went into the first door she saw. This was the first year girls dorm. There hadn't been many interesting items in there before so she kept her snooping to a minimum.
The sixth year girls proved to be her favorite room. She had figured out which area was her grandmother's. She sat on her bed and rummaged through her drawers, reading letters and looking at pictures. She found a particularly ironic letter from a girl named Tonya:
'Lil-
Oh my God! James Potter asked you to the Yule Ball? That's so weird! I saw him writing something in Potions and he wouldn't let me read it. I bet that was his letter to you. I'm so excited for you. Are you going to say yes? You better say yes! He's such a nice guy. Besides the whole Marauder thing. Although, that's kind of a plus when you think about it. Well, Binns is looking at me funny, I better go.
Au Revoir,
Tonya'
That one was dated from 1975, a year before. Megan smiled as she wiped a tear from her chin and wondered what Lily had said. The letter she had found when she was cleaning must have been his first attempt at asking her to the dance. He probably couldn't get the nerve to give it to her until it was too late and he had lost it so he had written another one.
"Poor guy." She said and put the letter back. Megan left the dormitory exactly as she had found it, returning to her place of temporary residence. As she walked in the door she noticed James was there, fists clenched, eyes closed and his back to the door. He was listening to a song and singing along with it.
"I'm a joker, I'm a smoker, I'm a midnight toker. I get my lovin' on the ruuuun..." The musical bridge came into the song and he continued bobbing stiffly to the song. "This is like, my anthem." He said and Megan exploded with laughter. He turned to her suddenly, with embarrassment.
"What the hell! Your anthem? Are you a country? Maybe a TV show." She said when she wasn't gasping for breath and laughing.
"Shut up, Megan." He said. She stopped momentarily but continued when the voice from the gramophone sounded again with a 'Woop woooo'.
"Don't you worry baby, don't worry, Mama." She said mockingly and grabbed his shoulder.
"I hate you." He turned it off, grabbed his Charms book and left.
***
A few nights later, the boys (and Megan) were in the dormitory about to go to sleep when Peter came out of the bathroom with his hands full of the stolen make-up. He looked down at his hands as he shut the door with his butt. Reumus, who's bed was adjacent to the bathroom (and closest to Peter), caught Peter's eye and then looked at the make up.
"Guys," Peter said and looked at the Marauders. "I-I know we take things sometimes, but I don't remember taking the girls make up. I really, really don't." He said earnestly.
"We didn't take it." James said and jumped off the bed and over to Peter. "I know we didn't. Maybe someone drugged us and then we took it." James offered.
"No one drugged us." Sirius said and looked over at Megan from the corner of his eye.
"I remember stealing it!" David said and Darryl nodded.
"Yes, we were trying to defeat the Dark Lord and get into the Chamber of Secrets when-"
"Everybody knows the Chamber of Secrets isn't real, Darryl." Reumus said. Megan noticed the cruel irony that none of them would know for at least twenty-five years.
"Look, we didn't steal it, that's the bottom line." James said and picked up an eye shadow. He looked at the bottom and the initials 'LE' on the label.
"And how likely is it that Dumb and Dumber did?" Reumus said.
"Megan, did you steal the make up?" Peter asked, still holding all of it.
"What! No, that's my make up." She lied and started grabbing them out of Peter's hands. James gripped her wrist as she reached for a tube of lipstick.
"If this is yours, what does LE stand for?" He asked and flashed the bottom of the eye shadow disc in his hand.
"LE? That's -um- my nickname. Love Eater." She said unsurely and searched around with her eyes.
"Love Eater?" James asked skeptically and let go of her wrist. She glared at him and snatched the eye shadow from his hand.
"Hey! It's better than Space Cowboy." She said and ran into the bathroom.
Three hours later she was still in the bathroom with the door locked. Reumus had spent twenty minuets banging on the door trying to make Megan let him in.
"Megan, please! I've really got to pee!" He would plead.
"Go out the window." Was her response more often than not. Once, Reumus almost broke down and did, but then reasoned with himself.
"I can't, um, 'go' out the window. The groundskeeper is out there."
"Pee on his head!" She shouted angrily.
"Megan, I'll get frostbite on my..." He started but trailed off.
"On your what?" Megan asked, finally finding some joy in this situation.
"On my you-know-what."
"Your wanky?" She asked in a high pitched, childish voice.
"Yes, yes my wanky, now let me in-"
"Your weiner?" She said in the same taunting voice.
"Megan, let me in."
"There are so many things you could call that."
"Why don't we discuss this, after I pee!" He begged.
"After you pee out of your Opposite of a Vagina?"
"Fuck you, Megan." He said and gave up
.
"Heh, Heh, Heh." She said, happy with herself. She then turned on the faucet very high, high enough to be loud enough to be heard in the dorm room.
"I hope you die!" He shouted.
They tried so hard to get Megan out of that bathroom. Megan actually wanted to come out, but didn't want to face the boys after stealing. Suddenly there was a rap on the door.
"Megan, we've got a suprise for you." She heard Sirius' voice, more calming than usual.
"For me?"
"For you." Sirius answered. "It's pizza."
"Pizza?"
"Yes, with pineapple and pepperoni and cheese."
"Pineapple?"
"THERE'S NO PIZZA!" Said an angry, growling voice in her ear. There was no one in the bathroom but herself, and she remembered opening her mouth to say it but she didn't know why. "THEY'RE LYING TO YOU!" It said.
"Why would they lie to you? They're your friends. They love you." Said a calming voice in her other ear. Another voice she knew she had made, but didn't know why.
"Megan, are you in there with someone?" David asked.
"No." She said quickly.
"But I hear someone." He said and leaned his ear against the door.
"Liar!" She shouted.
"I KNOW THERE'S NO PIZZA, I SAW THEM EAT IT ALL." Said the angry voice.
"Yes there is." Megan argued and shot up from the floor and put her hand on the door knob. Then she heard another voice from behind the door.
"Hey, Meg." Said the unfamiliar male voice. "This is Jim, Jim Morrison. I'll let you light my fire if you break on through to this side of the door." Megan jumped back in excitement and then suddenly opened the door to a room with no pizza, no pineapple, no pepperoni, and no Jim Morrison. She looked at them, with sheer disappointment in her eyes.
"I was delirious." She said and shook her head, going towards the bed. Reumus made a mad dash for the door and the rest of the room went to sleep.
{A/N: Ok, a few parts that need some discussion: The poop thing: Something we actually had to clarify with a few of our guy friends. How fucked up is that? All the penis names: I dunno, just thought it might be humorous and the Jim Morrison thing: Did you catch alll three references in that sentence? Uh-huh, extra points if you did! Talking to herself: Hell if I know, just a fun comment. And we're done! Mucho Love! Thanks for your reviews!}