Sara decided the anger bit wasn't doing her any good. She allowed herself a long speculative look at him, all while judging the distance between herself and the door, and his proximity to it. There was no way in hell she was going to allow him to escape the consequences of his actions tonight. Sara positioned herself in such a way that her advancement towards Grissom would force him to retreat farther into his office, as opposed to out the door. She allowed him one more chance to prevent the reckoning.
"Well?" It was just as well that the man was too clueless to understand the challenge in her question. He'd attracted her, pushed her away, attracted her again, all for some strange and cruel purpose of his own, and Sara wasn't about to let him off the hook with another weak excuse. When she left this office, he had better know exactly what to do about 'this,' and devil take the consequences. Sara knew she would be able to find another job easily if it came to that, and she told herself that the heartache of being without him would be assuaged by the cruelty of his reaction, should he choose to fire her over the decisions she was about to make.
Grissom, meanwhile, had felt an uncharacteristic twinge of fear at the change in Sara's body language and expressions. She had gone from rage to indecision to grim determination, all in a flash he could have missed had he not been watching her so closely. The rage he was ok with, the indecision he could handle, but this determination was what frightened him. He knew in his heart that they would need to resolve this 'thing' between them, but childishly he had hoped he could continue enjoying her company at work, and convince himself that was enough. Enjoying had turned to craving, and that was what had led him to turn away from her. A man who'd fallen in love late in life, he was not accustomed to falling victim to any emotions he couldn't readily shut away or deal with. He suddenly realized that Sara had come quite a bit closer to him than she was before. The look in her eyes was almost feral.
"What's the matter Grissom?" Sara's voice was harsh, clipped. "Don't like being trapped?" For a split second, he was confused as to her meaning, but then the pieces fell in place and her movements toward him made sense. She was now standing in front of the door, blocking any escape. He turned toward his desk, hoping to regain his authority by re-asserting his position as the supervisor.
"What? Now you can't even face me?" Sara's voice lashed out, and involuntarily Grissom found himself turning back towards her. A sudden giddy thought interrupted the tense moment in his mind, questioning why it was that men could not refuse a challenge laid out by a woman. Suddenly he found he could understand Marty McFly's inability to accept being called a chicken. The retreat to his desk now not an option, Grissom stood with his back to it, facing Sara with his arms crossed, awaiting her next verbal beating. She was a lot closer now, and Grissom cursed his sense of decorum, that forbade his simply turning tail and running out of the room. His mind was now a complete blank, besides the feeling of slight panic, and the intrusive thought that damn, Sara sure was sexy when she was angry.
A sudden surge of anger came over him. What was she doing here, in HIS office, berating him like he was some sort of naughty schoolboy? He did not call her in on her night off to be treated like this.
"What is it Sara, we have work to do." There, that ought to work.
"Oh, this IS work, Grissom. The hardest work there is." 'Teaching you to realize you pay for your actions, that you can't just play with my heart and then retreat when I decide to take you up on the implied offer.' Her comment clearly baffled him, and she chose that moment to step closer to him.
"What on earth are you talking about?" It was obvious that he had no idea what she was planning. Sara stepped closer. Time to give him one more chance...
"Have you noticed that we hardly ever work together anymore?" He opened his mouth to protest that he had called her to headquarters that night, but Sara held her hand up and stopped him before he could begin. "Don't even try to tell me you didn't have me working solo tonight." Grissom stayed silent, but looked away, which is all the answer she needed. "Griss, if we don't work on our...friendship," Sara had grasped for the correct word, and settled for that one. "We're going to have to give up on our working relationship as well." Somewhere in the back of Grissom's mind, he made the connection that she'd spoken as if they'd given up on their friendship. He supposed that, in all appearances, she was right. That didn't help matters though, considering that he was still completely tongue-tied, not that he could really define what he wanted to say even if he had the words to say it.
Sara stood stalk-still, counting seconds in her head. When she hit 60 with no reaction from Grissom, she launched her plan.
"Grissom." She spoke commandingly, requiring no less than his full attention. "If you're not going to speak to me, not going to fight me with words, then we're going to have to find some other way to resolve this." Sara watched him closely, and managed to catch the slight flicker as his eyes shot from her to the door and back. 'Oh, no, Griss. There will BE no escape.' Sara turned her head and looked pointedly at the door, indicating to Grissom that she'd caught his look.
"Are you feeling trapped, Dr. Grissom? You don't like that feeling, do you? You'd rather run away from life, hide away even from happiness, than be trapped into making a tough decision." With each sentence, Sara had advanced on Grissom, who in turn had backed up as far as he could. Sara's verbal images became reality as he felt the rough edge of his desk on the back of his legs. Sara stepped even closer, now to within a foot of him, blocking his escape with her body.
"You could get away, Griss," she said, her voice considerably softer than it was previously. "All you have to do is touch me; move me out of the way. You can't do it though, can you? You're so used to running away, that you won't even touch me, not even to get away from being cornered!"
He still hadn't spoken a word, not that Sara was surprised. She believed he was finally getting her point, though, and just in case he wasn't, she stepped forward one last time, close enough to feel his heat on her body. She could see the confusion in his eyes; the fear. She knew that, for all the time they'd spent together, as well as he knew her, he had no idea what was running through her mind right now.
She was right, he couldn't do it. She was wrong about the reasons, though. Grissom felt as though the tension in the room was just like natural gas, filling the room silently and invisibly, and touching Sara would be just like lighting a match. The anger and tension they both felt was quickly translating to a slightly different kind of tension, and therein lay the cause of his fear. It wasn't for lack of wanting Sara that caused him to push her away, it was not wanting the lack of her. He didn't think he could take it if he gave in to his desires and then lost her. For him, wanting Sara was an all-or-nothing kind of thing, and being the cautious man that he was, he had tried to convince himself that choosing nothing was the better for both of them. The adrenaline and testosterone rushing through his veins were rapidly changing his mind, though.
"Why won't you speak to me?" Sara lifted a hand to his mouth, tracing his lips with a soft finger. Grissom flinched as though he'd been struck by lightning, and indeed, that was how it felt. His hand snaked up and grasped her arm, not moving it but simply holding on. He wasn't sure if it was to stop her, or to hold on to her.
"Sara, don't--" The words came out as though torn from his soul, as she moved her hand from his mouth to the curls at his forehead, finally indulging herself by twisting one around a finger. The hand he had held her arm with slid up, resting on her shoulder. Grissom closed his eyes as he allowed himself a moment to savor her touch, just as Sara closed hers and did the same. She forced herself to ignore the fact that the only thing he'd said so far was "Sara, don't."