Author: Ryuen
Genre: Romance
Pairing: SenRu
Rating: PG
Warning/s:----
Dedication/s: To my deary friend, Purokulots! Hey dude! 'Sup? Thanks for dedicating to me that silly fic of yours! ^_^ Heh, that was soo damn funny, weird… and of course… stupid!! –lolz- Take Care, you punk! To all SenRu fans: here's a little 'comeback' from me, thanks! I know I still have tons of pending fics here… *sighs wearily* really busy—what with the coming holiday season and all! ^^;; Please R&R, ne? Arigatou!
A/N: A songfic—my ultra-super-duper-mega-kaboom-whambam-favorite song ever! From the 'genius' guy himself- yep, the one who made us all fall-in-love with his undying song… I'll Be… yep… Mr. Edwin Mc Cain himself! […if I am not mistaken, this is an OST from a movie…?] 0.o?
Standard Disclaimers Apply***
I did not want to believe at the so-called petty thing… 'love at first sight'. It was one of the most crazed saying ever! Yeah, how I used to remember my cruelty to some of my friends… making fun of them whenever I see them either thinking on one side of the room—thinking of their 'loved' ones that is… thinking on how to 'get' them… planning on how to make their first move… saving enough money just to buy some cheesy gifts! Sheesh… it was plain nuts and sheer stupidity to me! I especially hated the part wherein they become mightily poetic… almost beating the crap out of the world's number poet… whoever that mister is… heh!
That was me before… a happy-go-lucky-not-so-serious-highschool-playboy of Ryonan High. Yep. Two words. Sendoh. Akira. And you know what, still? I am ever adorned! Hahaha. All for the sake of my irresistible charms, charisma, wit, excellence… ahh… the epitome of perfection- and that is simply me. Yeah, I am darn vain but then, is it that too bad to be honest? Berate me but… still, people loved me! Yay!
Except for someone so blind.
Grr, how I used to hate him! Not really like, 'hate' him… you know what I mean… like… just /hate/ him for ignoring me to the core. I don't know what's with this uptight guy that keeps me slightly fuming whenever I will get to hear or see his coldness towards me. Hello?! I? Of all the people in Kanagawa? I who is the great Sendoh Akira- people love me… adored me… hail me… I am… uh, God? O~kay, maybe not 'Kami-sama' himself but… hmm… 'Basketball God!'? Argh… whatever… in short, I am ultra famous- and yess… no one and I do mean it… no one can even dare ignore me!
But he just did…
And he /always/ did…
And you know what…
I don't know why…
Why…
…by Gods…
It damn /hurts…/
Yep, you read it right…
/It hurts/…
I used to wonder a lot on why is that. Why the feeling of being ignored by someone… hurts. I have never, ever been ignored… well, except maybe for my plain naughtiness but… you know… the mere thing itself… 'ignored' as if I am /nothing/ but a plain dirt in his very own eyes.
I tried everything…
I tried to get his attention- doing some of the craziest things ever just to hear or see his reaction—even though how passive and plain it may be… I am and will be /contented./ Contentment? Since when did I learn the word? I didn't have that… nope, not until I met him that fateful day. Yes… it was almost like a scene in a TV drama- very, very mushy as it may seem but…
…ever since his eyes bore into my very own pair of orbs…
…I felt…
… nervous.
Not that I am scared- nothing stupid like that. I justly don't know what hit me back then… all I know is that… I was already smiling at him and was very much trying all the luck and sheer stupidity in the world just to get his attention.
I don't know if you would like to call me a modern-time jerk or maybe all of this 'innocence' of mine is plain naïve-ness—I honestly don't know.
Until one day… I was enlightened. Yep. Thanks to that someone who told me something about the thing I used to laugh and mock my hearts out… and you know what thing was it… heh…
… the so-called…
…love…
And then, time came when I finally come to admit to myself that I have also been cursed by the word. Gods! But… why do I have to fall for… a guy for Pete's sake? Why? I know very much that love transcends age, gender… everything. It is one of the most powerful feelings on Earth- no, it /is/ the most powerful feeling… that when you got hit right onto that pumping organ in your chest…
… you cant do anything about it…
You either feel suddenly so high… acting as if you are the most blessed creature on the face of the universe. What's worse is that… why is that whenever you are with that person… why… do it feels like you can do absolutely anything just to protect that person… even reaching to the absurdity of wanting to /die/ just… just for the sake… of him?
And so it was already way too clear for me… clearly enough to know and feel that this so called intruder within me is the so-called 'love'. Yess… and so I am finally in love. Good news everyone!
But you know what…
Are you supposed to feel an intolerable prick of pain when you are in love?
Is it… normal?
Was 'ache' a deserving feeling for someone so unserious before…?
No…
This isn't right…
This shouldn't be…
It can't be…
But…
/This/ is what I am feeling…
…have been feeling…
… all those past two years of trying to win him…
…his attention… his… /heart/…
"I love you Rukawa-kun…"
…it all came down to the drains when he told me the words…
"I don't feel the same way…"
I asked him 'why'? And he told me the most pricking words my heart has ever felt…
"I don't believe you…"
… then he left me and ran away…
… left me standing and broken-hearted under the weeping sky that unforgettable night of my life…
…he didn't see the tears that poured down from my eyes when he turned his back against me…
…he didn't…
How I use to cry every night… I always have this big lump in my throat I cant seem to swallow. The fucking pain of rejection…
This is all too much for my already battered pride…
I thought I could anything and anyone I wanted… but why… not him? Maybe he's not meant for me… but…
… I cant live with that!
No… I cant… I know I /cant/…
…not even a second… a minute… or hour of my every day can I live without seeing his lithe form…
…how could one live without his 'life'?
Now this is getting too deeper and way too serious but… yes, I remembered how I admit the fact that I am in love… but this…
…this feeling of…
…not being able to /survive/ the harshness of reality without him by my side…
Another set of two years passed me by… I am older and definitely much more mature now than before… I am definitely sure of what I truly wanted now more than ever…
A lot of things, happenings, and people came my way but still… none of them made me forget him… the person who I have always believed has taught me the real essence of love…
… I saw him one day…
…and so I decided to confront him once again…
Call me persistent but that is the way I am and yes… I know I have to ready yet myself for another slap in the face but… maybe… 'sincerity' of my words is what he all needed for him to believe me and for me to earn his trust and win his heart this time…
…since the pain of not being able to see him for years is that too unbearable for someone so suddenly powerless against everything…
…and so I…
…told him that I love him…
…I only
…love… him…
That time… no matter how hard that is…
… I just had to…
…heaven help me…
…A second chance Rukawa Kaede…
…just this time…
------------------
I opened my eyes to the sound of heavy rain pouring noisily against the window. As I tried to adjust my eyes to the darkness surrounding me- I caught a glimpse of the wall clock.
2:30 am…
It was still pouring hard…
Rain always seems to remind me a lot of things that has happened to me during the past years…
I sighed softly against the quite and gloomy morning…
My eyes widened a bit when I felt a weight shifted closer to me…
I looked down and was met by a pair of glassy blue orbs…
… the same pair of sapphire stones I have come to love…
I smiled lovingly at him…
"Sorry… did I wake you up?"
He blinked once and shook his head ever so slightly.
I couldn't help but to kiss him softly on his forehead and whispered the words I know never in my life will I get tired of saying to him…
"I love you Kae-chan…"
…he smiled back and snuggled closer to me…
… lying here with him…
… listening to the rain…
… smiling just to see the smile upon his face…
…these are the moments I thank God that I'm alive…
…these are the moments I'll remember all my life…
… I've found all I've waited for…
… and I could not ask for more…
::owari::
A/N: That's all minna! Thankies so much for taking the time to read my fic! I surely appreciate it very much… anou, if its not too much to ask… could you kindly R&R? ^_______________^ Hehehe… ack! If you're craving for the lyrics of the song itself… here it is!!!! Gomen if this sux… ^^'
I Could Not Ask For More-Edwin Mc Cain
Lying here with youListening to the rain
Smiling just to see the smile upon your face
These are the moments
I thank God that I'm alive
These are the moments
I'll remember all my life
I've found all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more
Looking in your eyes
Seeing all I need
Everything you are
Is everything to me
These are the moments
I know heaven must exist
These are the moments
I know all I need is this
I have all I waited for
And I could not ask for more
I could not ask for more
Than this time together
I could not ask for more
Than this time with you
And every prayer has been answered
And every dream has come true
Right here in this moment
Is that where I want to be
Here with you
Here with me…
These are the moments
I thank God that I'm alive
These are the moments
I'll remember all my life
I've found all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more
I could not ask for more
Than this time together
I could not ask for moreThan this time with you
Every prayer has been answered
Every dream has come true
Right here in this moment Is where I want to beHere with you
Here with me…
I could not ask for more
Than the love you gave me
Coz its all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more…
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