Geminae Gundam Galactical
Miranda Shadowind

Author's Note: The song being parodized here is the translation of "Golden Queen Galaxia" from Sailor Moon Sailor Stars. It's an awesome villain song I highly recommend.

Quatre shook his head as he watched the scene of borderline chaos across the room. The week before, he and Dorothy had invited the other Gundam pilots and their spouses over to celebrate the second anniversary of the Barton Foundation's defeat. However, although they could keep the peace between the Colonies and the Earth, doing so amongst themselves was a different matter.

In this case it was Wufei and Krysta, who were currently exchanging various insults and the occasional obscenity. No one was sure who had started the argument, but with those two one could never tell. Sally simply smiled and watched, knowing her husband was getting what he deserved.

"Brainless chauvinistic berk!" Krysta yelled.

"Insufferable onna who can't speak English right!" Wufei retorted, knowing that would strike a nerve.

"Whoi I oughta...!" Krysta's eyes narrowed as she clenched a fist and brought it back.

"He's gonna get it now..." Duo snickered.

Ever the pacifist, Relena marched over to the pair before Heero could stop her. "Both of you stop this childishness right now! Can't you be civil with each other for ONE night?!"

"Fluffy? CIVIL?! Tha'll be the day, 'e doesn' even know the meaning of the word!" Krysta cackled in disbelief.

"Speak for yourself, Gutter Onna!" Wufei couldn't believe she had the gall to call HIM uncivilized when SHE was the one who had spent time on the streets. Granted, he didn't know exactly how much time she'd spent there (only Duo did), but he didn't really care either.

Slitted emerald eyes glared back at him. "Nae, tha's whea they'll find yer body, in the bloody gutta!!!" How dare he denounce her as a common street urchin when she'd only spent a little over two years "down below"! It wasn't her fault that the Alliance had destroyed her childhood home and almost everything she held dear!

Duo's blood was boiling as well after Wufei's last comment. "Save some of him for me Krys, I want his head on a platter!"

Wufei ignored Duo's demonic tone. "You stay out of this, Maxwell! Riannese is the one who cried uncivility in the first place!"

"Actually, technically Miss Relena declared both of you uncivilized before that," Dorothy interjected with a devious grin, her sadistic streak having never quite faded. As she saw it, the more carnage the better.

"Dorothy...!" Relena couldn't believe her best friend would turn her [Relena's] own words against her like that.

At this reminder the two rivals froze, looked each other in the eye, and slowly nodded. Relena wanted civility between them? She would get it - if only for a few moments - while they united against a common enemy. Ironically enough, said enemy happened to be her.

Relena took one look at Krysta's and Wufei's demented features and took several steps backwards, panicking. They would have given chase if not for the sudden all-too-familiar sound of a gun being cocked. A wordless yet clear warning that if either ex-pilot so much as loomed in Relena's direction (s)he would be dead before (s)he hit the carpet.

Which brought them back to square one. If they couldn't take their anger out on Relena, it would have to be on each other. Quatre quickly realized this and attempted a different form of intervention.

"Umm... karaoke time everyone!" he announced, gesturing to the nearby machine and CD racks.

Krysta considered, then gradually lowered her fists, still scowling a little. Wufei smirked smugly at her. "What's the matter Riannese? Finally at a loss for words?"

Quatre groaned, but Krysta merely got onstage and headed for the karaoke machine, a mischievous grin forming on her lips. "Far from it, Fluffy." Wufei grunted as snickers rose from the others.

Krysta browsed the CD racks for a minute before making her selection. 'Oh yes, this one's perfect...' She popped it into the CD player and toyed with the track buttons until it was on the right song. She picked up the microphone just as organ music started playing.

*Gundam Darkness...
Gundam Darkness...
*

"What are you plotting?!" Wufei demanded, unable to make sense of it despite the fact that those were only the opening lines. Then again, in his opinion almost nothing made sense if Krysta was involved.

She ignored him and launched into the first verse with a snicker.

*The six Gundams overflow light in
the huge United Earth Sphere
Everything in chaos and death
The Maiden of Turmoil!
*

"Quatre Rabaerba Winner, I'm surprised someone like you'd have this song in your collection!" Duo commented, a bit surprised.

"She's changed the lyrics, and besides, I didn't buy that one, Dorothy did!" the blonde Arabian replied.

"That explains it."

*The alignment of insane scientists brings
Not normal soldiers, Gundam Pilots instead
the power of feminism is in my hand..
.*

"There is no such power you weakling!" Wufei cried, not liking where this seemed to be headed.

It was all Krysta could do to keep from laughing as she began the chorus, raising her right fist.

*Forward!
Gundam Geminae!
Calling everyone weak, a sexist dwells
I make his life miserable!
*

"And you shall pay for that starting now!" Wufei headed for the stage only to be tripped by a howling Duo. This made Sally laugh even harder than she already was.

*I just keep shining brightly
I'm Shinigami's Maiden of Turmoil, Krysta!
*

"That's my girl!" Duo said, quickly pulling his braid out of harm's way as Wufei sliced at it. Quatre snickered softly, and the other girls were giggling.

A wide evil grin spread across Krysta's face as she leaned over and locked eyes with her furious sword-wielding rival.

*Wufei no baka, the planet in the corner overhead
to protect it from "injustice"
I challenge you to a surprise attack!
The Maiden of Destruction!
*

"Yours is the only injustice that Earth needs protection from!" Ready to accept this challenge, Wufei turned to gather more weaponry only to spot something disturbing. Heero and Trowa were actually looking a little more than mildly amused! Apparently Relena and Midii had gotten them to loosen up a little over the past two years.

*The alignment of insane scientists brings
Not normal soldiers, Gundam Pilots instead
the power of feminism is in my hand...
*

Undaunted, Wufei charged the stage, but Krysta was ready for him.

*Let's end this!
Stuffington Fluffypants!
You possess your "justice" and Nataku
and your admittance that woman are strong is my desire!
I just keep shining brightly
I'm Shinigami's Maiden of Turmoil, Krysta!
*

"I'll NEVER admit it! You're all weak! SHI NE!" Furious, Wufei took a swipe at her, but she sidestepped it and hit him over the head with her microphone.

The resulting screech was cut short by the cord being chopped in several places by a katana. There was a music break at this point, so the battle that should have started several minutes before began at last.

"Aren't you worried?" Midii asked Duo, a bit concerned. The spectators had moved to the walls to keep clear of the two-person tornado that was zipping about the room.

"Nah, Krys can hold her own, Gundam or no Gundam," he replied, watching as his bruised and battered wife fought her way onstage, grabbed the second microphone, and repeated the all-too-appropriate chorus.

*Let's end this!
Stuffington Fluffypants!
You possess your "justice" and Nataku
and your admittance that woman are strong is my desire!
I just keep shining brightly
I'm Shinigami's Maiden of Turmoil, Krysta!
*

As the final chords were playing, everyone looked up as a loud Chinese battlecry rang out. Krysta barely ducked in time as Wufei went flying over her head and slammed into the wall. Panting and laughing at the same time, she staggered offstage, leaning on Duo for support.

As Wufei peeled himself off the wall, she paused long enough to get out, "'ad enough?"

"Just call me Fluffy..." he mumbled in a daze before keeling over.