Melancholy
by Feana Puddlefoot.
Disclaimer: I don't own Cho Chang, Cedric Diggory or any other characters featured in the Harry Potter series.
NOTES: This is because I support Cho and I don't think enough people really consider how she must have felt after Cedric's death. CC welcome.
'Cho, do you want a drink?'
'Nah, it's okay. I'm fine, thanks.'
I remember smiling, and I remember feeling warm inside as he walked away. Warm like when you wake up and snuggle back down into bed. And all the time, I had this funny little tingling feeling at the back of my head and on my neck. Especially when Cedric was near.
He always looked out for me. I felt so safe with him around. I knew I'd chosen someone decent. Someone who'd never lie to me. Who'd always be faithful. Who'd love me. Not that I know if he ever loved me. He never said so. But he acted like he did. Always so gentle and patient. How many nights have I spent awake, wondering if he loved me? Wondering what would have happened if he'd lived? Would we have gotten married? Maybe had kids? I see our kids sometimes. Three. Two little girls and a boy. And they all have Cedric's grey eyes.
Oh God, those eyes. Those calm, sensitive eyes. I desperately want to look into them again. Just for a second. I can't, though. But I want all of him back, really. I want his small smiles. I want his warm arms. I want his tall frame. He always was so much taller than me. I didn't mind though. He made up for it by leaning down often or picking me up and swinging me around.
And it's like nobody cares.
Do they all expect me to be over it by now? To be happy, pretty, smiling Cho? How can I smile when Cedric will never smile again? How can I laugh? How can they laugh? How can anyone laugh when the sun has left the Earth? It makes me angry, sometimes.
Nobody wants to talk about it. They just don't get it. Nobody knew him like I did. I saw the whole Cedric. His joys, his hopes, his insecurities. To them all that's been lost is a flat piece of paper. He was more than that. He wasn't just a flat cardboard cut out. He was a real person, and now he's gone and it seems I'm the only one who even cares or notices.
The halls of Hogwarts are empty if Cedric isn't there.
'Harry won. I'm pleased for him. My father, however..'
Kind Cedric. Clever Cedric. Patient Cedric. But most of all, you were fair. In every sense of the word. Beautiful, and just. It would have been so easy to be bitter about so many of the things that happened to you, but if you ever were bitter, you didn't show it. You were all for admitting your faults and weaknesses with good humour and I loved that so much. I felt like I could be completely honest with you and you'd never take offence. I miss the comfort I felt in your presence. I don't find it anywhere else.
Oh, Cedric. I have to know what your last thoughts were. Were they of me? Did you say you loved me? I've got to know. How can I live my life without knowing everything that happened to you in those last fatal breaths?
And I know exactly who to ask.