Author: Monnie
Rating: PG13
Summary: The cast of The X-Files goes to an amusement park in Canada. Canada-- for some reason I find that funny already.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Chris Carter, except Jennifer and company. They belong to me. =)
Authors Notes: This is the official sequel to my other fic "Insanity". Expect one last installment within a month. The last one will be a collaboration with my other fic "Dinner". I don't know about y'all but I'm excited! I'm like one of those bad Hollywood directors. I get a few really good reviews and I try to push it as far as I can. Hehe.
***
Robert: Eh, look. The Niagara County Fair is coming to town. It's a few hours away and it's in Canada but I hear it's rally good!
Annabeth: Canada? Robert, I--
David: No, no, no Annabeth, I think this is a great idea! Now everyone in Canada can see what a great person I am, letting myself stoop down to the level as to go to a public amusement park! *Me*.. at an amusement park; ugh.
Gillian: Oh shut up!
Robert: Gosh, Gillian you're so damn sexy when you 're angry. *floats toward Gillian*
Annabeth: ROBERT! *slaps Robert*
Gillian: Oh, that's fine Annabeth, men just can't resist me. Can you blame them?
(Gillian and Annabeth fight, while David looks into a mirror, combing his hair)
Robert: You guys!!! Back to the amusement park... ?
David: Ooooh, but we'll have to pass by Buffalo. I don't like Buffalo, it'll be bad for my image!
Gillian: Okay seriously, what the Hell is your problem today?
Annabeth: You know, um, I think we should go. It'll take our minds off things! And after we can go to Marine Land! It's like five minutes away and they have beluga whales! Whales! You know, just like in the commercials... *starts singing Marine Land commercials*
David: (gives Annabeth a dirty look) Who's car are we taking?
Robert: Actually, there's a bus leaving in a few hours that would take us right to the gate at Niagara!
David: A buss?! Who do you think I am?!?!
Gillian: Wear a hat. (puts a rather ugly fisherman's hat on David's head) No one will ever recognize you if you cover up that big head of yours.
Annabeth: Gillian, why do you have a fisherman's hat in your pocket?
Gillian: (through clenched teeth) That... is not... the point!!!!!
Robert: (clears throat) The bus leaves at 11 AM, we'll meet back here at say... 10:30?
David: Good. That'll give me just enough time to style my hair. Maybe I'll get a new pair of sunglasses too, so I can look oh-so-cool. Ooooh yeah. (struts off)
-TWO HOURS LATER-
(Gillian, Annabeth and Robert are waiting. David has yet to show up)
Gillian: Where the Hell's David? He's supposed to be here by now!!
Robert: You really are sexy when you're mad Gillian...
Gillian: Ew, get the Hell away from me!! You ugly old bat... (walks away)
Annabeth: I'm sure David will be here any minute now. He probably just stopped by the mall to get some hair gel or something.
Robert: David in a mall. Somehow I doubt that. He'd rather order it by mail and wait four weeks, than be seen in a mall.
Annabeth: I don't believe some people. They land a spot in a TV show and let all the fame get to their heads.
David: Oh yeah? How would you know?
Gillian: Speak of the devil. What the Hell happened to you?!
David: You will not believe it! I went to the hair stylist and he almost used medium brown highlights #57 instead of medium brown highlights #58!! Can you imagine!?
Gillian: (pokes Robert who has now fallen asleep)
Annabeth: You guys! The bus is here! The bus is here, we're gonna miss the bus!! C'MON!
David: Don't wet yourself...
Annabeth: (glares and repeats calmly) The bus is leaving. Let's go.
David: (smirks)
(Everyone gets on the bus and finds a place to sit)
Robert: Ah, these seats are so comfortable. It's like--
Gillian: A party for your ass?
Robert: You betcha.
Girl from the Back of the Bus: (squeals with delight) IEEEEEEE!!!!! Evwybody look! It's da X-Files gang! AHHHHH! *grins stupidly*
Gillian: Oh Jesus, this is NOT happening.
David: Wow! More adoring fans! All for ME!
Annabeth: How sweet! Look how excited they all are!
Gillian: No dumbasses! It's Jennifer! From when we went to the mall last time, remember?
Robert The one that kept foaming at the mouth?
Jennifer: (begins foaming at the mouth) Ooooh yeah, that's me all right! Are you guys going to da X-Files convention too??
Gillian: Excuse me, what X-Files convention are you talking about?
Robert: Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you- there's also gonna be an X-Files convention across the street from the County Fair.
Annabeth: OH! An X-Files convention! Can we go? It sounds pretty kewl! (grins and starts talking with Jennifer)
Gillian: (ignoring Annabeth) Let me get this straight. You got all of us on a bus to Canada. A bus, which not only by the way smells funny, but is carrying a whole group of X-Files fans right where we're going. And you didn't tell any of us!?!?!
Robert: You are rally *really* hot when you're mad Gillian. Now kiss me, kiss me now!!
Jennifer: Skulley, why is Doggett calling you "Gillian"?
Gillian: Oh my God. Jennifer! We already went through that at the mall!
Jennifer: No you didn't... you and Mouldy and Doggy went for pizza, 'member?
Gillian: (forces a smile) Look, Jennifer, sweety, why don't you take David here to the back of the bus and show him to all your friends! I'm sure he's love to explain everything all-- Annabeth what the Hell are you doing??
Annabeth: Signing autographs.. everyone on the bus wants one.
Gillian: Those are 8x10's of me... not you. And you're signing them.
David: (grins) Aw shucks, get in the spirit Agent Scully! Here, I'll sign some for you.
Gillian: You are forging my signature...
Annabeth: OH! That's forgery you know... did you know that?!
Jennifer: Ohhhh *drools* C'Mon everybody! Da X-File gang is givin' free autograph piccys! Wah! *sqeals with delight*
(everyone on the bus comes running)
Gillian: I don't believe this... these people have no lives!
David: Oh get over it. Remember when you watched nothing but Brady Bunch reruns for months on end? You said you and Marsha were like soul sisters.
Annabeth: *grins* Really Gillian?
Robert: Oh I think Marsha Brady is very.. very attractive.
David: Oh yeah! Gillian would bring all her Brady Bunch videos on the set and she'd watch them in between takes! We used to tease her about it all the time!
Gillian: *Clears throat* So who wants autographs?!
Jennifer: Look! Look! Da X-Files gang is fightin'! Oooooooooooooh!
Bus Driver: Last stop, Niagara County. Everybody out. *falls asleep*
Gillian: Thank God.
David: (whispers OT Annabeth) She seems grumpy/ Must be PMS.
Annabeth: You'd know. And EWW, use a breath mint!
David: You'd know. I don't have one.
Annabeth: Here. *hands David a mint*
David: *eats it* Hey, this is good! *grins*
-two minutes later-
David: ARGHHHHHH!!! Fuck it, are you trying to kill me Annabeth?!
Annabeth: No, just the evil bacteria that lurks in your mouth. But now you know why they call altoids the curiously strong mint!
David: (gives Annabeth the evil eye)
Annabeth: Oh look-- cotton candy! Pink! *runs off*
David: Is she always like that?
Robert: I'm afraid so... Hey Gillian, how does a spin on the love boat sound? I have a coupon for $1 off if I bring a buddy!
David: *smirks* Is he always like that?
Gillian: I'm afraid so! *throws water on Robert*
Annabeth: *runs back with cotton candy all over her* Hey! You leave Robert alone!
David: What the Hell happened to you? You have cotton candy in your hair!
Annabeth: Oh I know, I got full and my hair was just all over the place you know? So it seemed like the only logical thing to do! And it worked.. look how it's not moving at all now! I think the pink looks pretty kewl too. *grins*
David: Oh yes.. very "kewl".
Robert: WOW! Annabeth you look amazing! Say, how about going on the love boat with me? I got a coupon!
Annabeth: *giggles* You got it big boy!
(Annabeth and Robert run off)
David: "big boy"?
Gillian: I don't even wanna know. Hey, you wanna go on the old roller coaster while we're waiting?
David: But the wind will mess up my hair... !
Gillian: (glares)
David: Wll, I suppose I can make an exception just hits once.
(they both get on the roller coaster)
Gillian: This is kinda nice! *grins*
Voice from behind Them: Oh mah God, it's da Skulley and Mouldeer!
(Gillian & Dvid glance at each other as roller coaster drops down steep hill)
Gillian + David: Jennifer?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!