Author: Hilda
Title: Solace
Warnings: shounen ai, fluffiness; later on, you will be treated to a hearty helping of angst, self-injury etc etc.
Pairings: hints of 1x2 in the beginning - 2x4 later on
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing - surprise, surprise. Don't sue me or poor little Quatre will cry!!
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
"Quatre, it's me - I'm sorry to bother you, but, well, may I come in?"
Surprised, Quatre sat straight up in bed and stammered in the direction of the door: "Of, of course Duo, come in."
The door was pushed open slowly to reveal Duo in simple black pajamas, his hair hanging free, cascading down his back. His eyes were hidden, half by shadows, half by auburn bangs. Quatre noted the absence of Duo's usual goofy grin - something was definitely wrong.
"Duo, are you all right? Are you feeling well? Is there anything I can do for you?" the blonde asked urgently.
Duo's hidden eyes seemed to be watching the floor as he spoke quietly. "Heero kicked me out of his room." He said it bluntly and without emotion - what Quatre could see of his face was unreadable.
The blonde boy wore an expression of understanding. He had assumed that the two pilots had been sharing a room, what with how close they had become lately. Quatre was about to say some supportive words, but Duo spoke first.
"I'm really sorry to bother you like this, but could I ask a favor of you.?" he trailed off hopefully. Trying not to seem too taken aback by Duo's politeness, the small blonde responded instantly with emphatic nodding. "Oh yes, anything Duo, all you have to do is ask."
Quatre could barely keep his jaw from dropping as he witnessed pink embarrassment spreading across Duo's cheeks. It was so out of character for him to be acting in such a roundabout manner!
"Well, er, you see." the shadowy pilot stumbled, shifting nervously. "I couldn't go to Trowa of Wu Fei about this, but I knew you'd understand, umm." He stopped again, took a deep breath and forced his thoughts out into the open.
"Quatre, could I stay in here tonight? I promise it'll just be one night. I just don't want to go back to my old room right now."
Duo looked up and for the first time, the boys' eyes met. Quatre smiled understandingly and answered softly: "Of course - it would be a great honor to sacrifice my bed for the likes of Shinigami."
Duo's face went that bizarre shade of red again. "No, no, no - don't get up," he stammered as the blonde moved to get out of bed. "If you could just scoot over a little bit. I'm really sorry. really - if you just give me a little bit of room on one side, I promise I'll be out of your way by morning."
He stumbled forward as Quatre moved away from the clock that had held his attention earlier. Duo shuffled over to the other side and climbed in. The young Master watched worriedly as the black clad boy curled up into a ball on the far edge of the bed, facing the wall.
With one last glance at Duo, Quatre flicked off the light and the two were bathed in darkness.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ [1]
Whether it was seconds or minutes or hours later, Quatre didn't know. Troublesome thoughts kept tugging at his brain, keeping him awake as he tried to answer their incessant questions. No matter how many times he went over it in his head, he simply could not figure out why Duo had been so timid in asking for help. Could Heero have really said or done something so bad that it had stolen the smile from Duo's face?
Quatre fidgeted. Maybe the braid-wearing pilot had been drinking.
Quatre leaned in close to Duo so as not to disturb the sleeping boy. Propping himself up on his elbows, he made to sniff the pilots breath, but was instead left with a very unsettling sight indeed.
Tears were streaming down the curled up pilot's face, and his face was contorted in an expression of anguish. His hands were resting by his face on the pillows, but were balled up into fists, his fingernails scraping deep into the palms. Also, just visible in the moonlit room were red, raised scars on Duo's pale, barely exposed wrists. Quatre's eyes grew even wider at this last observation. It barely even registered with him that there was no alcohol to be smelled about the boy. He did know that something was very wrong.
Suddenly the brown haired pilot's body shuddered with an audible sob, and began to shake uncontrollably with smaller ones.
Quatre didn't know what to do - he searched his mind frantically for something to do to help, but his brain could come up with nothing. Duo was still shaking - he had to do something - he couldn't take seeing a friend like this.
Slowly, nervously, Quatre allowed his instincts to take over. His arms snaked around the distressed pilot, and to his great surprise, Duo calmed, just slightly. The blonde thought of something that surprised him even further.
Carefully, deliberately, he hugged the pilot to him, curving his own body around Duo protectively. Quatre kissed Duo gently on the top of his head, almost like a mother would, trying to further ease the sobs.
Still immersed in fitful sleep, Duo opened his mouth in a pained gasp, as if searching for another mouth to answer and comfort his own. When there was no reply, he began to sob again, whimpering slightly.
Quatre nervously rolled the pilot onto his back and debated whether not he should. He'd never kissed anyone like that before - what if he did it wrong? Upon processing this latest series of thoughts, Quatre realized that he was actually considering it - he really wanted to kiss Duo, to ease his pain, even if it was only for a moment. "And he probably won't remember a thing in the morning anyway." he assured himself in his head.
He closed his eyes and slowly brought his lips to meet those of Duo. The anguished look vanished from his face, replaced by a peaceful expression as he calmed completely in Quatre's arms. The blonde breathed, then went back for another gentle kiss.
The blonde had honestly never felt so happy in his entire life - to be able to comfort someone else and himself simultaneously, to fill this strange void deep in his chest that he had never been consciously aware of until that moment.
A few more seconds and the kiss was done. Quatre let Duo curl back up into his previous sleeping position and once more he conformed to the sleeping boy, smiling this time. He hugged Duo close to him, unable to resist the urge to never let go again.
Suddenly, Duo whispered something barely audible in his sleep. Quatre blinked and smiled.
He could see the red glow of the clock, but couldn't see the actual time - of course, he had no intention of getting up to check for details. Instead he allowed himself to bury his face in the Duo's hair and drift off to sleep, the brunette pilot's groggy words ringing in his head:
"thank you."
TBC
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
[1] - I had originally cut off the section there, but I decided to go ahead and post a longer chapter instead of a tiny, annoying section of sorts. Oh, and sorry about the first chapter being so short - I know how irking it is to take the time to start reading a story only to find that the author is a lazy bum.
Well, that was a painful piece of work, ne? I usually write better than this, but since my experience lies in poetry and creative writing, it's a little hard for me to adjust to pre-existing characters and guidelines. Just try and bear with me for a little longer!! - Hilda
Title: Solace
Warnings: shounen ai, fluffiness; later on, you will be treated to a hearty helping of angst, self-injury etc etc.
Pairings: hints of 1x2 in the beginning - 2x4 later on
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing - surprise, surprise. Don't sue me or poor little Quatre will cry!!
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
"Quatre, it's me - I'm sorry to bother you, but, well, may I come in?"
Surprised, Quatre sat straight up in bed and stammered in the direction of the door: "Of, of course Duo, come in."
The door was pushed open slowly to reveal Duo in simple black pajamas, his hair hanging free, cascading down his back. His eyes were hidden, half by shadows, half by auburn bangs. Quatre noted the absence of Duo's usual goofy grin - something was definitely wrong.
"Duo, are you all right? Are you feeling well? Is there anything I can do for you?" the blonde asked urgently.
Duo's hidden eyes seemed to be watching the floor as he spoke quietly. "Heero kicked me out of his room." He said it bluntly and without emotion - what Quatre could see of his face was unreadable.
The blonde boy wore an expression of understanding. He had assumed that the two pilots had been sharing a room, what with how close they had become lately. Quatre was about to say some supportive words, but Duo spoke first.
"I'm really sorry to bother you like this, but could I ask a favor of you.?" he trailed off hopefully. Trying not to seem too taken aback by Duo's politeness, the small blonde responded instantly with emphatic nodding. "Oh yes, anything Duo, all you have to do is ask."
Quatre could barely keep his jaw from dropping as he witnessed pink embarrassment spreading across Duo's cheeks. It was so out of character for him to be acting in such a roundabout manner!
"Well, er, you see." the shadowy pilot stumbled, shifting nervously. "I couldn't go to Trowa of Wu Fei about this, but I knew you'd understand, umm." He stopped again, took a deep breath and forced his thoughts out into the open.
"Quatre, could I stay in here tonight? I promise it'll just be one night. I just don't want to go back to my old room right now."
Duo looked up and for the first time, the boys' eyes met. Quatre smiled understandingly and answered softly: "Of course - it would be a great honor to sacrifice my bed for the likes of Shinigami."
Duo's face went that bizarre shade of red again. "No, no, no - don't get up," he stammered as the blonde moved to get out of bed. "If you could just scoot over a little bit. I'm really sorry. really - if you just give me a little bit of room on one side, I promise I'll be out of your way by morning."
He stumbled forward as Quatre moved away from the clock that had held his attention earlier. Duo shuffled over to the other side and climbed in. The young Master watched worriedly as the black clad boy curled up into a ball on the far edge of the bed, facing the wall.
With one last glance at Duo, Quatre flicked off the light and the two were bathed in darkness.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ [1]
Whether it was seconds or minutes or hours later, Quatre didn't know. Troublesome thoughts kept tugging at his brain, keeping him awake as he tried to answer their incessant questions. No matter how many times he went over it in his head, he simply could not figure out why Duo had been so timid in asking for help. Could Heero have really said or done something so bad that it had stolen the smile from Duo's face?
Quatre fidgeted. Maybe the braid-wearing pilot had been drinking.
Quatre leaned in close to Duo so as not to disturb the sleeping boy. Propping himself up on his elbows, he made to sniff the pilots breath, but was instead left with a very unsettling sight indeed.
Tears were streaming down the curled up pilot's face, and his face was contorted in an expression of anguish. His hands were resting by his face on the pillows, but were balled up into fists, his fingernails scraping deep into the palms. Also, just visible in the moonlit room were red, raised scars on Duo's pale, barely exposed wrists. Quatre's eyes grew even wider at this last observation. It barely even registered with him that there was no alcohol to be smelled about the boy. He did know that something was very wrong.
Suddenly the brown haired pilot's body shuddered with an audible sob, and began to shake uncontrollably with smaller ones.
Quatre didn't know what to do - he searched his mind frantically for something to do to help, but his brain could come up with nothing. Duo was still shaking - he had to do something - he couldn't take seeing a friend like this.
Slowly, nervously, Quatre allowed his instincts to take over. His arms snaked around the distressed pilot, and to his great surprise, Duo calmed, just slightly. The blonde thought of something that surprised him even further.
Carefully, deliberately, he hugged the pilot to him, curving his own body around Duo protectively. Quatre kissed Duo gently on the top of his head, almost like a mother would, trying to further ease the sobs.
Still immersed in fitful sleep, Duo opened his mouth in a pained gasp, as if searching for another mouth to answer and comfort his own. When there was no reply, he began to sob again, whimpering slightly.
Quatre nervously rolled the pilot onto his back and debated whether not he should. He'd never kissed anyone like that before - what if he did it wrong? Upon processing this latest series of thoughts, Quatre realized that he was actually considering it - he really wanted to kiss Duo, to ease his pain, even if it was only for a moment. "And he probably won't remember a thing in the morning anyway." he assured himself in his head.
He closed his eyes and slowly brought his lips to meet those of Duo. The anguished look vanished from his face, replaced by a peaceful expression as he calmed completely in Quatre's arms. The blonde breathed, then went back for another gentle kiss.
The blonde had honestly never felt so happy in his entire life - to be able to comfort someone else and himself simultaneously, to fill this strange void deep in his chest that he had never been consciously aware of until that moment.
A few more seconds and the kiss was done. Quatre let Duo curl back up into his previous sleeping position and once more he conformed to the sleeping boy, smiling this time. He hugged Duo close to him, unable to resist the urge to never let go again.
Suddenly, Duo whispered something barely audible in his sleep. Quatre blinked and smiled.
He could see the red glow of the clock, but couldn't see the actual time - of course, he had no intention of getting up to check for details. Instead he allowed himself to bury his face in the Duo's hair and drift off to sleep, the brunette pilot's groggy words ringing in his head:
"thank you."
TBC
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~
[1] - I had originally cut off the section there, but I decided to go ahead and post a longer chapter instead of a tiny, annoying section of sorts. Oh, and sorry about the first chapter being so short - I know how irking it is to take the time to start reading a story only to find that the author is a lazy bum.
Well, that was a painful piece of work, ne? I usually write better than this, but since my experience lies in poetry and creative writing, it's a little hard for me to adjust to pre-existing characters and guidelines. Just try and bear with me for a little longer!! - Hilda