Hello again! I am such a pitiful excuse for a writer... I had a week to
write this chapter, but i didn't write until today, the day I post.
fortunately for me, i'm off school today because of election day. election
day is such a cruel irony... my birthday is a week and a half after
election day, so even after i'm eighteen i won't be able to vote for
another year. oh well. anyway, here goes.
History Behind the History, chapter eight
It was amazing how much information one could find on a person if one tried. The caption under that little photo in his history book and Mr. Higo's comments in class had led him to believe hitokiri Battousai was practically a phantom, but there was much more knowledge than he had thought. What lies beneath is never fully betrayed by the surface.
Apparently, there was a small faction of historians fascinated, like him, by this 'Himura' character. There was an even smaller faction within this one that was interested in his wife, Tomoe. Akitaka was scanning one of this group's Web sites currently, and had come across quite the intriguing passage. Yukishiro (Himura) Tomoe faithfully kept a diary throughout the time she knew Battousai, which, if found, would undoubtedly reveal much about both of them.
Akitaka's interest was piqued. There was a physical object he could hunt. He read on. This book ultimately ended up in the hands of her ferociously attached brother, Enishi. What would a 'ferociously attached brother' do with it? Most likely, he would keep it with him everywhere he went if he were really attached, or maybe keep it at his house if he were more sedate. This led him to search for two places: where Yukishiro Enishi lived, and where he died.
* *
*
Kenshin sat there a long while after his commanding officer left, staring alternately at the book in his hands and the fire in front of him. He was, for the second time, contemplating joining the two, when, for the second time, someone interrupted by entering. This tattered little book really must be fated to survive.
"Enishi-chan," he greeted rather emptily. All he received in answer was a cold glare before the now-white haired child turned and ran the opposite direction.
As the departed's husband, Kenshin technically owned all of her worldly possessions now, but thought this diary would best serve Enishi. It would help him understand things, but... when he was older. Such a young boy probably wouldn't understand the respect with which it should be treated, and anyway he wouldn't have anywhere to put it. e was probably homeless. It would be kept for him, though. It didn't seem right for Kenshin to keep it until then, so he would leave it to the same ones to guard her body.
He felt a little guilty for not trying to help Enishi when he could guess that the boy was homeless and alone, but there were reasons he could not really do much anyway.
As nice as it might be as a reminder to Kenshin of Tomoe, Enishi would not want to live with his sister's killer, even if it had been an accident and even if it was his best chance of survival. Actually, the survival part was debatable, since Kenshin was a key player in this little thing called a war that was still going on...
The next best thing to do for the child after taking him in would be to refer him to someone else who could do so, though even this would have to be done covertly, as Enishi would willingly die before knowingly taking advice from Kenshin. He didn't really know of anyone who could- and more importantly, would- do that anyway, however. The most he could do for Enishi right now was to preserve his sister's thoughts until he was old enough to receive them.
Even though he couldn't help Enishi, Kenshin found himself wondering where he would go and how he would live. They were only about five years apart in age, which brought to mind a similar situation he had faced at a similar age.
Was it already five years ago that he had been another orphaned ten- year-old that also had no place to go and no family? Now he was in the position of the murderers who were the reason he'd been orphaned, and Enishi was in his own place. He hung his head, struck by the similarity between them. Would some kind stranger take on Hiko's role in the repeated incident? The odds were such that if one did not, a gambler would put his money elsewhere than Enishi's survival, or at least his well-being.
If anything, Enishi's real sister could be likened to Kenshin's three adopted 'sisters' who had never known him as Kenshin. Tomoe had died trying to save Kenshin, however, not Enishi, but it still sort of fit. Tomoe, his fellow slaves, plus all the people he had willingly killed... so many people had died because of him, and would likely continue to do so. Even after he stopped killing when the war ended, might more people sacrifice themselves willingly to die for reasons that had somehow to do with him? Might it preserve more life if he simply extinguished his own before anyone else died? The voice of one of those very people came to mind and declared otherwise.
"Until you're old enough to choose your own way of life, you've got to... you've got to stay alive!" A woman's voice implored somewhere inside his head. He had still not chosen his own way of life, had he? He had always been pushed into things by adults and calmly acquiesced. Though he had not protested, he had not asked to be taught the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. He had chosen to be involved in the war, true, but he had not chosen this. When he'd been approached about becoming an assassin, he again had not protested, but had not asked for it, either. Katsura had made it sound like such noble work, ridding the world of injustice and oppression, creating a new, peaceful era, but really all that was a sham. No doubt, Katsura believed those things and had not intentionally lied to him, and this absolved him of nothing. He had allowed himself to be convinced. Violence begets violence, not peace, despite the best of intentions. It is a vicious cycle, piling action upon reaction upon revenge upon more and more and more... it would never stop until someone did something other than the retaliation the cycle demanded, refused to continue the violence. It would not stop on its own when the war's causes were satisfied, as some believed. Someone would have to actively refuse it, which would not happen for quite some time. He saw that now. If he were the one to stop the cycle, that would mean simply quitting, and he did not have the authority to make others stop. Someone in a decision making position would have to make the appropriate decision, whichever side the decision came from. Perhaps he could bring the end more quickly if he stayed here to do his dark job. That might or might not be true, but it was what he was resolved to do. Only time would reveal what the correct choice would have been.
****************************************************
i like this chapter because it has enishi in it... and i love enishi. he's bad, but i pity him. i often do that. anyway, on to the review responses:
Ginger1280: Don't feel obligated to review; it's a privilege for me and not a right. You won't hurt my feelings. i'm not planning for kenshin and akitaka to meet because they lived about 125 years apart and i would have to make this into a sci-fi story to do that. thank you for saying you like this, i'm glad you're enjoying it. i think it's better than my other fic, 'Baka Deishi' since it's more internal and angsty and also i know more about rk now so it's more accurate. my others are either one-shot or poetry, so they can't really be compared to this.
Amaya: thank you for your ideas, but as you can see akitaka's getting info from a different journal now. i like the flashbacks, though. they're part of the structure of the chapters now, and the most fun to write. that was cute about the universe. hey guess what? i used your name in my spanish homework. i had to write a short story with spanish words in it and amaya was this very misao-like character (read: loud).
Hitokiri-san: sorry if katsura was too cruel... i meant it to be a contrast between the strong emotions ken is having and katsura's rather normal behavior, but also that he's trying to encourage him to be strong. plus when you're feeling loss and someone else isn't quite as injured by it as you, you tend to think they don't care even if they do, it's just human nature kenshin just got that impression i guess even if that's not what katsura meant to convey. hey, i don't know much about the Japanese language, but i just noticed this... your name means 'honorable assassin' doesn't it? how ironic and creative.
PraiseDivineMercy: actually i hadn't planned on it, but you gave me the idea and i used it. he's going to have to work to track it down by finding out things about enishi, which i'm going to LOVE writing! i adore enishi!
History Behind the History, chapter eight
It was amazing how much information one could find on a person if one tried. The caption under that little photo in his history book and Mr. Higo's comments in class had led him to believe hitokiri Battousai was practically a phantom, but there was much more knowledge than he had thought. What lies beneath is never fully betrayed by the surface.
Apparently, there was a small faction of historians fascinated, like him, by this 'Himura' character. There was an even smaller faction within this one that was interested in his wife, Tomoe. Akitaka was scanning one of this group's Web sites currently, and had come across quite the intriguing passage. Yukishiro (Himura) Tomoe faithfully kept a diary throughout the time she knew Battousai, which, if found, would undoubtedly reveal much about both of them.
Akitaka's interest was piqued. There was a physical object he could hunt. He read on. This book ultimately ended up in the hands of her ferociously attached brother, Enishi. What would a 'ferociously attached brother' do with it? Most likely, he would keep it with him everywhere he went if he were really attached, or maybe keep it at his house if he were more sedate. This led him to search for two places: where Yukishiro Enishi lived, and where he died.
* *
*
Kenshin sat there a long while after his commanding officer left, staring alternately at the book in his hands and the fire in front of him. He was, for the second time, contemplating joining the two, when, for the second time, someone interrupted by entering. This tattered little book really must be fated to survive.
"Enishi-chan," he greeted rather emptily. All he received in answer was a cold glare before the now-white haired child turned and ran the opposite direction.
As the departed's husband, Kenshin technically owned all of her worldly possessions now, but thought this diary would best serve Enishi. It would help him understand things, but... when he was older. Such a young boy probably wouldn't understand the respect with which it should be treated, and anyway he wouldn't have anywhere to put it. e was probably homeless. It would be kept for him, though. It didn't seem right for Kenshin to keep it until then, so he would leave it to the same ones to guard her body.
He felt a little guilty for not trying to help Enishi when he could guess that the boy was homeless and alone, but there were reasons he could not really do much anyway.
As nice as it might be as a reminder to Kenshin of Tomoe, Enishi would not want to live with his sister's killer, even if it had been an accident and even if it was his best chance of survival. Actually, the survival part was debatable, since Kenshin was a key player in this little thing called a war that was still going on...
The next best thing to do for the child after taking him in would be to refer him to someone else who could do so, though even this would have to be done covertly, as Enishi would willingly die before knowingly taking advice from Kenshin. He didn't really know of anyone who could- and more importantly, would- do that anyway, however. The most he could do for Enishi right now was to preserve his sister's thoughts until he was old enough to receive them.
Even though he couldn't help Enishi, Kenshin found himself wondering where he would go and how he would live. They were only about five years apart in age, which brought to mind a similar situation he had faced at a similar age.
Was it already five years ago that he had been another orphaned ten- year-old that also had no place to go and no family? Now he was in the position of the murderers who were the reason he'd been orphaned, and Enishi was in his own place. He hung his head, struck by the similarity between them. Would some kind stranger take on Hiko's role in the repeated incident? The odds were such that if one did not, a gambler would put his money elsewhere than Enishi's survival, or at least his well-being.
If anything, Enishi's real sister could be likened to Kenshin's three adopted 'sisters' who had never known him as Kenshin. Tomoe had died trying to save Kenshin, however, not Enishi, but it still sort of fit. Tomoe, his fellow slaves, plus all the people he had willingly killed... so many people had died because of him, and would likely continue to do so. Even after he stopped killing when the war ended, might more people sacrifice themselves willingly to die for reasons that had somehow to do with him? Might it preserve more life if he simply extinguished his own before anyone else died? The voice of one of those very people came to mind and declared otherwise.
"Until you're old enough to choose your own way of life, you've got to... you've got to stay alive!" A woman's voice implored somewhere inside his head. He had still not chosen his own way of life, had he? He had always been pushed into things by adults and calmly acquiesced. Though he had not protested, he had not asked to be taught the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. He had chosen to be involved in the war, true, but he had not chosen this. When he'd been approached about becoming an assassin, he again had not protested, but had not asked for it, either. Katsura had made it sound like such noble work, ridding the world of injustice and oppression, creating a new, peaceful era, but really all that was a sham. No doubt, Katsura believed those things and had not intentionally lied to him, and this absolved him of nothing. He had allowed himself to be convinced. Violence begets violence, not peace, despite the best of intentions. It is a vicious cycle, piling action upon reaction upon revenge upon more and more and more... it would never stop until someone did something other than the retaliation the cycle demanded, refused to continue the violence. It would not stop on its own when the war's causes were satisfied, as some believed. Someone would have to actively refuse it, which would not happen for quite some time. He saw that now. If he were the one to stop the cycle, that would mean simply quitting, and he did not have the authority to make others stop. Someone in a decision making position would have to make the appropriate decision, whichever side the decision came from. Perhaps he could bring the end more quickly if he stayed here to do his dark job. That might or might not be true, but it was what he was resolved to do. Only time would reveal what the correct choice would have been.
****************************************************
i like this chapter because it has enishi in it... and i love enishi. he's bad, but i pity him. i often do that. anyway, on to the review responses:
Ginger1280: Don't feel obligated to review; it's a privilege for me and not a right. You won't hurt my feelings. i'm not planning for kenshin and akitaka to meet because they lived about 125 years apart and i would have to make this into a sci-fi story to do that. thank you for saying you like this, i'm glad you're enjoying it. i think it's better than my other fic, 'Baka Deishi' since it's more internal and angsty and also i know more about rk now so it's more accurate. my others are either one-shot or poetry, so they can't really be compared to this.
Amaya: thank you for your ideas, but as you can see akitaka's getting info from a different journal now. i like the flashbacks, though. they're part of the structure of the chapters now, and the most fun to write. that was cute about the universe. hey guess what? i used your name in my spanish homework. i had to write a short story with spanish words in it and amaya was this very misao-like character (read: loud).
Hitokiri-san: sorry if katsura was too cruel... i meant it to be a contrast between the strong emotions ken is having and katsura's rather normal behavior, but also that he's trying to encourage him to be strong. plus when you're feeling loss and someone else isn't quite as injured by it as you, you tend to think they don't care even if they do, it's just human nature kenshin just got that impression i guess even if that's not what katsura meant to convey. hey, i don't know much about the Japanese language, but i just noticed this... your name means 'honorable assassin' doesn't it? how ironic and creative.
PraiseDivineMercy: actually i hadn't planned on it, but you gave me the idea and i used it. he's going to have to work to track it down by finding out things about enishi, which i'm going to LOVE writing! i adore enishi!