Three Little Lab-Techs

by Bugs & Beauty

AN: An adaptation of the Three Little Pigs done CSI style.

There was a crime lab in Las Vegas that housed three little lab-techs, each lab-tech decided he had a specialty of his own and went forth in the building to prove himself. The first lab-tech found a room with a microscope and other basic lab equipment. He decided that this was where he would became famous.

Along came the ex-stripper and knocked on the door. "Little Lab-tech, do you have my results yet?"

To which the lab-tech replied, "No, come back another day."

The ex-stripper answered to him, "Then I'll yell and scream and talk about my kid all day." So she yelled and screamed and talked about her kid all day and the little lab-tech fell asleep with boredom and she ate him.

The second little lab-tech came upon a room with everything the first lab-tech had and so much more. He had fume hoods, electroscopes and even his own computer system. He sat in his chair was pleased with himself.

Then along came the ex-stripper and said, "Little lab-tech where are my results?"

"Come back in an hour." The lab-tech told her.

"Then I'll yell and scream and talk about my ex-stripper days all day long." So she yelled and screamed and talked about her ex-stripper days. The little lab-tech fell asleep from boredom and she ate him.

The third lab-tech found an empty room with only a single sheet of paper and a single pencil. He decided that this would be where he made his mark. So he sat down and was pleased with himself.

The ex-stripper came by as she did with the other lab-techs and said, "Little lab-tech where are my results?"

"Come back in a minute, I'm brewing coffee."

"The I'll yell and scream and talk about Sam Braun all night long." She talked and yelled and screamed but the little lab-tech just sat and drank his coffee all shift long. When the ex-stripper found out that he would not be lulled by her boring talk, she devised a plan. "Little lab-tech I know where some equipment is if you want it."

The little lab-tech nodded his head. "Sure."

"Come down to the evidence room and get it at five o'clock." They left the building but the little lab-tech came back at four o'clock and gathered all his equipment. When the ex-stripper came back at five, she was very angry with him.

"Okay little lab-tech, I know you got there before me but I also know where to get some pictures of Sara."

"Where at?" The little lab-tech poked his head out of the room.

"Come down to her locker room at four."

So they both left the building but little lab-tech came back at three and got the picture of Sara smiling at the camera. He was ready to leave when the ex-stripper walked into the room. "What? Did you find the picture already?"

"Yes I did but Warrick had one of you naked over there." He pointed to the far side of the room. While she was looking for it, he ran to his lab. He proudly put it up where he could see it every day. The ex-stripper was now very, very angry.

"Okay little lab-tech I know where Grissom keeps his recipe for Red Creeper." Now the little lab-tech knew this was a trap but he HAD to get the Red Creeper. "Go down to is office at two."

The both left the building. Little lab-tech decided to come in extra, extra early so he arrived at noon. He got a recipe card for the Red Creeper but he saw that the ex-stripper was there early too. "Oh my! What will I do?" There was no where to hide. He jumped behind the Singing Billy Bass fish.

The ex-stripper poked her head inside. "Little lab-tech where aaaaaare yoooou?" She looked around.

Little lab-tech was scared so he hit her over the head with Billy Bass and ran to his lab with the Red Creeper recipe in his hand. The ex-stripper ran after him as fast as she could go in her heels. She decided to shoot him and eat him up.Seeing the ex-stripper's intentions, little lab-tech pulled out a wall size photo. He hid behind it so when the ex-stripper saw it, she died instantly.

"I never thought I would be one to say, a naked Hodges saves the day."

The End